Twenty-four plus six – Amy Brett
This insightful, harrowing and emotionally raw book is a ‘must read’ for all those working within the NICU. It’s a journey of highs and lows through the eyes of a mother not knowing if her baby girl will survive, trying to navigate her way through all the experiences a mother shouldn’t have to go through.
As a NICU mother myself, this book was sometimes like reading my own story, by some twist of fate both our babies were discharged in November 2019 and so our babies were struggling for life at the same time, which makes Amy’s story so poignant for me.
Do we name our baby? Does she feel pain? Would she be better off dead? These are some of the questions we ask on a daily basis. We struggle with the guilt of not holding, touching, cuddling and feeding our babies…Will this affect her in later life? What if all these machines and drugs affect her health? What will the future hold for her and for us as a family? The questions keep on coming, but there aren’t any answers, it’s a day by day, hour by hour struggle to get to the next test result and speak to the next member of staff. Normal life goes out the window and you’re left in a world of pain that you walk through feeling completely alone.
How lucky we are to have our babies’ home! This is how we should feel, but discharge comes with its’ own problems, how does anyone begin to process the trauma? Talking helps, seeing her grow and flourish helps even more. Mentally though, it’s tough. I can still hear the beeps of the machines, I still want to call the doctor every time she falls over, and I know that every NICU parent out there will live with the effects for a very long time.
Thank you so much for writing this incredible book Amy, and for highlighting how amazing our NHS is for being able to save our babies every day. To have staff that can communicate and empathise with parents in the most stressful and painful times in their lives, can make all the difference.