The Contemporary Dictionary of Sexual Euphemisms

by Jordan Tate

Until now, no dictionary has ever attempted to record the fascinating and often raunchy inventory of English sexual euphemisms.  Jordan Tate has confronted this task with gusto and the results are nothing short of gratifying.  The Contemporary Dictionary of Sexual Euphemisms is a hilarious, unabashed, at times shocking compilation of every sexual euphemism you’ve ever heard—and many more you haven’t. 
Would you be offended if someone called you a “back door burglar”? Ever heard of a “five against one”? Would you rather do the “Little Dutch Boy” or the “Little Red Riding Hood”?  Along with both a literal and a sexual definition of each euphemism, this dictionary also has photographs, and, of course, an example of each term used in a sentence—all in an effort to irreverently entertain and inform.
A perfect guilty pleasure for anyone who ever got a thrill looking up dirty words in the dictionary as a kid, the Contemporary Dictionary is also a must-have reference tool for those just plain too shy to ask what a “pearl necklace” really is.

114 pages, Hardcover

First published January 9, 2007

Reviews

[Daniel · Rating 3 out of 5]

Absurdly ludicrous is the best way I think I can describe this book. Now at times this is the best aspect of the book, thou given it is on nearly every page, it makes what should be fun, a bit tedious. Here is what I mean, on every phrase is first a list of "dictionary definitions" which is in itself ludicrous, such as "smoking sausage, to draw in and exhale smoke from a finely chopped and seasoned seasoned meat". Which is followed by the equally absurd picture of a man literally lighting up a piece of sausage. Or my wife's favorite a picture of a man with an eye patch over one eye, throwing yogurt against a wall for the one eyed yogurt slinger. Which in some cases, (like this one) is quite hilarious, however for many it is simply stupid and tedious, adding little if anything to the subject of the book.

There is also a false sense that the author was trying to be seen as being academic in absurdly adding what appear to be poor etymologies to each phrase, (which may not be as poor as they appear) thou even assuming that they aren't, I can't figure anyone who reads such a book is looking for the etymologies of these off phrases, and would have been better to leave them to another book.

My last beef (pardon the pun), is that it appears that the man who wrote this, is out to write all male euphemisms in a bad light; and any referring to women, (in less then flattering terms) as mens' fault. This is shown with near ubiquity in phrases like, "contemporary masculinity has developed the need to have all aspects of sexual activity be a power-seeking event for men. Even when the male is the only person involved, it is about a domination of his penis." For both together he adds, "like many for the vagina, is generally unappealing. The use of these types of euphemisms is to ascribe shame to the female sexuality while exalting male power and control (male euphemisms are generally powerful)."

So with these caveats in mind, it is a short and at times entertaining read, and you are sure to learn of at least a few euphemisms you have not heard before, thou it is really all useless outside of the odd trivia; or facts to put into your bag of odd things you happen to know but will likely never use. Or at least I can't think of the real world situation of which any of these would be of any use.

As a whole it is not a bad read, but it could have been better, if you are interested in the subject in general, I thought the Encyclopedia of unusual sex practices was a much better written book, and much more practical; even if such things may not apply to you directly, but maybe helpful to know, and would recommend it far more highly, thou it is longer, more academic, and carries caveats of its own.

[Molly]

Gotta love the cover art.