Losing Sammy

by Valerie Theng

The heartbreak of miscarriage is experienced by women all across the world, and yet, it remains an uncomfortable topic of conversation for many. Expectant mothers are not taught how to prepare emotionally for miscarriage, and the immense feelings of loneliness and helplessness can cloud over. Many women often find themselves grieving alone – mourning their child they have never had the pleasure of meeting, but whose life and future they had dreamt about.

Losing Sammy is a collection of twelve letters written by Valerie Theng to an unnamed mother after she suffers the miscarriage of her son. The letters speak of loss and loneliness, strength and courage, love and hope, and an overwhelming sense of peace. They seek to encourage, console, and to serve as a reminder that these women are not alone, but that:

“Our heavenly Father is indeed a gracious and loving God. Although these letters were initially written with surging pain, I rejoice to tell you that I am finally at peace. My Lord has indeed caused me to sing and dance again. The season of grief has passed, and I am sure it will too for those who begin their journey with me in my time of grief. For He is more than able.”

78 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2012

Reviews

[Hannah Mozingo · Rating 5 out of 5]

I wish this book didn’t resonate as heavily with me as it did. But recently grieving the loss of a second precious baby, this book was a balm to my soul.

I felt often while reading it that it uttered the words my heart longed to form. Reading it felt like spending time with a friend who truly understood the depths of my own grief. I appreciated Theng’s honesty and consistent pointing of my heart to Christ.

He is with me in the valley. He knows my sorrow. He counts my tears. Thank God.

[Sophie · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book follows the journey of the author through the loss of her child through miscarriage. It invites you into the emotional, spiritual and bodily experience of her grief, her process of making sense of her loss and her experience of loss within her marriage, family and community.

This book is raw with emotion and honesty. A must read for anyone in pastoral ministry or a counselling role. Miscarriage is so common and so dismissed, and in the midst of this the grief of these mothers can be left unheard.

Although this is a short book, it is not one easily read due to the weight of its subject.

[Natalie Print · Rating 3 out of 5]

A concise and readable book, which is a collection of letters written by a Christian lady following a miscarriage. As this topic is often rarely talked about, the openness of the author is refreshing and much-needed. Not just aimed at those who have personally experienced a miscarriage, it is helpful for anyone who wants to be more sensitive to those around them who have experienced the pain of a miscarriage.