What do you think?
Rate this book
Do not Marry before Age 30
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
April 20, 2019
Ugh. This is a very difficult book for me to review.
First of all, I want to say that I am probably not the intended audience for this book. This book is clearly written with the daughters of Chinese immigrants who live in the US. I am neither Chinese nor do I live in the US. However, this is exactly why this book was so fascinating to me and gave me a lot of food for thought outside of the "box" of my surrounding. That is what I liked about this book. Much of the advice I read in there was so substantially different to what I have been heard before that it helped me to question things for myself and therefore get to know me better.
However, there are several aspects in this book which I had problems with. For one, the whole book reads as if the author is very confident that her advice is fitting for every woman. It reads as if it is best for every woman to have a smashing career, to get rich fast, to be self-centered and then marry a perfect Mr Right after a very cautious dating phase modeled after the process of corporate headhunting, and then get married relatively old and have kids after. She also implied that you should basically only have kids when you can afford a 24/7 nanny. All in all, the book is empowering women and promotes a rather self-centered and selfish outlook in life, career and love. I think for some women that is very empowering and helpful. Especially for women who are under pressure from their parents and need an extra "push" towards an emancipated life and fulfilling their own dreams and not dreams of someone else. However, this book is not really encouraging the reader to follow their own dreams emancipated from the vision of the family and society but it is rather pushing the reader towards the life plan and lifestyle the author herself chose.
The most problematic chapter was the chapter about sexual harassment at the work place. She basically gave the advice to not report the incident to the company but to just leave the company quietly after interrogating the traitor and firmly asking the traitor for help to leave the company. I think the latter is something that only very very very few victims of sexual harassment have the energy and courage to do. Her arguments as to why not report sexual harassment are making sense, however she ignores the effect this has on the whole society. When a woman DOES report harassment, this has a positive effect on the work environment of all women! If she does not and just leaves, it has no consequences for the traitor and therefore the overall situation stays the same. The author basically exclusively looks at what is best for the victim from the victims own career perspective, which I think is not sufficient.
Also, her views on relationships and sex is extremely sexist. There are countless examples for sexism in this book. If you are sensitive to this or are not a "cliché woman", this book is not for you because you will get a headache at least.
What I really liked about the book was that it was written in fantastic style. It was so easy to read and it had a great "drive" and sometimes felt like a very effective motivational speech.
Why does it get 3 stars? While I think many aspects in this book are (sometimes highly) problematic, I think overall and for the audience it was intended for, it probably is a good book which can help women get more emancipated from their parents and the pressures of society. Also, it was very well written and inspiring. For me, this book did broaden my horizon by providing me with different views on life and life planning strategy.
First of all, I want to say that I am probably not the intended audience for this book. This book is clearly written with the daughters of Chinese immigrants who live in the US. I am neither Chinese nor do I live in the US. However, this is exactly why this book was so fascinating to me and gave me a lot of food for thought outside of the "box" of my surrounding. That is what I liked about this book. Much of the advice I read in there was so substantially different to what I have been heard before that it helped me to question things for myself and therefore get to know me better.
However, there are several aspects in this book which I had problems with. For one, the whole book reads as if the author is very confident that her advice is fitting for every woman. It reads as if it is best for every woman to have a smashing career, to get rich fast, to be self-centered and then marry a perfect Mr Right after a very cautious dating phase modeled after the process of corporate headhunting, and then get married relatively old and have kids after. She also implied that you should basically only have kids when you can afford a 24/7 nanny. All in all, the book is empowering women and promotes a rather self-centered and selfish outlook in life, career and love. I think for some women that is very empowering and helpful. Especially for women who are under pressure from their parents and need an extra "push" towards an emancipated life and fulfilling their own dreams and not dreams of someone else. However, this book is not really encouraging the reader to follow their own dreams emancipated from the vision of the family and society but it is rather pushing the reader towards the life plan and lifestyle the author herself chose.
The most problematic chapter was the chapter about sexual harassment at the work place. She basically gave the advice to not report the incident to the company but to just leave the company quietly after interrogating the traitor and firmly asking the traitor for help to leave the company. I think the latter is something that only very very very few victims of sexual harassment have the energy and courage to do. Her arguments as to why not report sexual harassment are making sense, however she ignores the effect this has on the whole society. When a woman DOES report harassment, this has a positive effect on the work environment of all women! If she does not and just leaves, it has no consequences for the traitor and therefore the overall situation stays the same. The author basically exclusively looks at what is best for the victim from the victims own career perspective, which I think is not sufficient.
Also, her views on relationships and sex is extremely sexist. There are countless examples for sexism in this book. If you are sensitive to this or are not a "cliché woman", this book is not for you because you will get a headache at least.
What I really liked about the book was that it was written in fantastic style. It was so easy to read and it had a great "drive" and sometimes felt like a very effective motivational speech.
Why does it get 3 stars? While I think many aspects in this book are (sometimes highly) problematic, I think overall and for the audience it was intended for, it probably is a good book which can help women get more emancipated from their parents and the pressures of society. Also, it was very well written and inspiring. For me, this book did broaden my horizon by providing me with different views on life and life planning strategy.
March 9, 2021
I can’t wait to recommend a good book to everyone. 80% of the truths have been taught to me by my previous boss, and the truth has been verified by practice. Don’t be fooled by the title, I recommend reading it to girls of all age.
January 22, 2018
Agree with Joy...
Found really enjoying when reading...
Maybe a little bit more practical information :)
Found really enjoying when reading...
Maybe a little bit more practical information :)
February 23, 2019
It basically focuses on how you should be wise while selecting your life partner ...it's about self love and how to build yourself as a women in this male dominated society..
May 19, 2022
4.5 ⭐
August 12, 2015
I won this book through the GoodReads First Reads giveaway program.
This genre is not the sort of a book which I would usually read. Though it is interesting to read Joy's take on modern-day liberal feminism, I found some of the opinions presented to be way too strong and skewed. However, it did gave me a different perspective on the subject of the book - I'm sure it would be a very compelling read for people interested in this genre!
This genre is not the sort of a book which I would usually read. Though it is interesting to read Joy's take on modern-day liberal feminism, I found some of the opinions presented to be way too strong and skewed. However, it did gave me a different perspective on the subject of the book - I'm sure it would be a very compelling read for people interested in this genre!
March 3, 2015
A book that Chinese parents should read.
September 29, 2015
I like the book. its a light read, lots of things to learn, adds a new perspective . There were instances I could relate and I enjoyed my time
May 6, 2015
Một quyển sách khơi gợi cho tôi những cảm hứng mới để đọc nhiều nữa và đi tìm những giá trị sống cho bản thân mình
March 23, 2013
great book, highly recommend girls to read it.
March 7, 2018
A book that mentions some critical questions among women who are on their way searching for a Mr.Right. I would like to rate a 5 star if Joy provided more deep discussions and practical solutions/applications. Unfortunately, it was not. However, this book is truly a mind changing one. I highly recommend every women to read it.
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews