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Transforming Church Conflict: Compassionate Leadership in Action
With many pastors facing burnout and congregations suffering from internal divisions, there is a need for Christian resources that present concrete problem-solving techniques for handling conflict in the church. This book offers practical skills and strategies that the authors have learned through years of studying nonviolent communication (NVC) as described in Marshall Rosenberg's book, Nonviolent A Language of Life , and as developed by numerous NVC trainers all over the world. Using real-world case studies and examples, Hunsinger and Latini helpfully guide pastors and lay leaders through effective and compassionate ways to deal with discord. These strategies include differentiating observations from evaluations, experiencing and expressing feelings, identifying and connecting with needs, and making requests rather than demands. By learning the basic skills of compassionate communication, church leaders can be empowered to transform, rather than merely manage, church conflict
- GenresChurch
270 pages, Paperback
First published April 2, 2013
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34 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews
October 20, 2013
This review, by Dr. Nicholson, has been provided courtesy of Desert Bible Institute www.desertbibleinstitute.com.
Deborah Van Deusen Hunsinger and Theresa F. Latini address an important issue in their book Transforming Church Conflict. They look at what it means to work with people and to deal with the predictable conflict that comes about on a daily basis. This book has a great number of useful points that readers should consider. For instance, church leaders should always attempt to transform conflict into something useful rather than transfer it onto someone else. Additionally, I agree with their position that we should try to understand another person’s position before attempting to correct the problem. They explain how to do this all with great sensitivity and compassion. That said, I think that this would be an excellent book for leaders of a women’s group, provided they weren’t operating in a church.
The book seems to rely heavily on modern psychotherapy principles (not to be confused with true psychological principles). There then seems to be a smattering of spiritualism, Eastern philosophy, and emerging church approaches that make this book suspect at best. While there is certainly the occasional verse thrown in giving the book a Christian feel, most of these references seem to be more thematic than illustrative in nature. Additionally, some of the examples seem to be, if not out of context, slanted to prove the point the authors are trying to make in that section of the book.
In the end, the book comes across as well-meaning and gentle-spirited, but its theology, and therefore its basis, seems either convoluted or manipulated. The writers are clearly literate and well-educated women that have an honest and heart-felt concern for the women around them, but this book needs a little less C.G. Jung and Siddhartha and a lot more C.S. Lewis and Saul of Tarsus. In a world where the popular theory is to just "coexist", this book is a solid example of social "tolerance" and compromise; but then again, we saw what Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego thought about compromise.
Trent Nicholson, Ph.D., D.Min.
Desert Bible Institute, President
Dr. Nicholson reviews academic, Christian living, and fiction books for a variety of publishers in an array of formats. He is never paid for any of his reviews. He writes these strictly as a courtesy to his students at Desert Bible Institute and for any other readers that might find his insights valuable. For more reviews or information, visit Dr. Nicholson’s blog at drtnicholson.wordpress.com.
Deborah Van Deusen Hunsinger and Theresa F. Latini address an important issue in their book Transforming Church Conflict. They look at what it means to work with people and to deal with the predictable conflict that comes about on a daily basis. This book has a great number of useful points that readers should consider. For instance, church leaders should always attempt to transform conflict into something useful rather than transfer it onto someone else. Additionally, I agree with their position that we should try to understand another person’s position before attempting to correct the problem. They explain how to do this all with great sensitivity and compassion. That said, I think that this would be an excellent book for leaders of a women’s group, provided they weren’t operating in a church.
The book seems to rely heavily on modern psychotherapy principles (not to be confused with true psychological principles). There then seems to be a smattering of spiritualism, Eastern philosophy, and emerging church approaches that make this book suspect at best. While there is certainly the occasional verse thrown in giving the book a Christian feel, most of these references seem to be more thematic than illustrative in nature. Additionally, some of the examples seem to be, if not out of context, slanted to prove the point the authors are trying to make in that section of the book.
In the end, the book comes across as well-meaning and gentle-spirited, but its theology, and therefore its basis, seems either convoluted or manipulated. The writers are clearly literate and well-educated women that have an honest and heart-felt concern for the women around them, but this book needs a little less C.G. Jung and Siddhartha and a lot more C.S. Lewis and Saul of Tarsus. In a world where the popular theory is to just "coexist", this book is a solid example of social "tolerance" and compromise; but then again, we saw what Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego thought about compromise.
Trent Nicholson, Ph.D., D.Min.
Desert Bible Institute, President
Dr. Nicholson reviews academic, Christian living, and fiction books for a variety of publishers in an array of formats. He is never paid for any of his reviews. He writes these strictly as a courtesy to his students at Desert Bible Institute and for any other readers that might find his insights valuable. For more reviews or information, visit Dr. Nicholson’s blog at drtnicholson.wordpress.com.
March 14, 2022
I wanted to give this book 4 stars, but like another reviewer said, it was extremely dry. I appreciated the Christian perspective on the NVC technique. I liked the charts and examples of language. That being said, I was not reading this as a Christian book for the church, I was reading more about how to personally reconcile NVC with my theology. Frankly, I was able to extrapolate some good information for my approach to conflict in my secular job.
July 9, 2015
There is some good in this, such as we should try to understand the other person's side of the situation before attempting to solve a problem with in the church, but much of this is psychobabble, of the psychotherapy, not actual psychological principles.
Much of it feels like the authors were using very specific illustrations to force a point. Many just fell flat when looked at from an objective point of view.
I wanted to like this book. I didn't. I debated between 2**'s and 3, and decided I'd be generous and go for three. There are some good things to be learned, but you'll need to sift through the garbage to find the gems.
Much of it feels like the authors were using very specific illustrations to force a point. Many just fell flat when looked at from an objective point of view.
I wanted to like this book. I didn't. I debated between 2**'s and 3, and decided I'd be generous and go for three. There are some good things to be learned, but you'll need to sift through the garbage to find the gems.
February 20, 2015
An amazing and incredible helpful book for those in ministry, even if it is a bit dense at times. The writers practitioners, to be sure, but are also very much academics and the depth of both their content and prose can make this a slower read than you're anticipating, but worth every single effort to really internalize what they're saying.
July 14, 2015
Great book! Loved the idea of how in essence we are all just trying to fulfill our basic needs. We get in conflict when we have unmet needs. Great practical ideas on how to embrace the innevitability of conflict and instead of seeing it as something bad to avoid, see it as something that can be used to transform our lives and the lives of those around us.
July 2, 2016
Super. Good info and wise advice.
April 23, 2017
Deborah Huntsinger cleverly weaves Marshall Rosenburg's method of non-violent communication into a well-articulated strategy for mediating church conflict and bearing with one another in love.
Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews