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If Only I Had Learnt
"If only I had learnt to be a lady," Elizabeth whispered, "then perhaps I might be fit to marry, but as it is, I am not." Is it possible for a man, even one such as Fitzwilliam Darcy, to change her mind?
520 pages, ebook
First published November 20, 2011
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June 23, 2017
This is a darker P&P what if. In this version much has changed. Mrs. Bennet has been dead these past 5 years before the arrival of Mr. Bingley to Netherfield. And Mr. Bennet is blind; suffering an accident 10 years prior. Mr. Collins has already been and gone with His wife Charlotte nee Lucas and won't reappear until about 1/2 way through the story.
Lizzy is quite a bit altered, having served as the defacto steward of Longbourn for the past five years, she is not only an accomplished horsewoman but also an accomplished driver. Lydia and Kitty are the least changed of the Bennet family, both still immature and foolish despite not having had Fanny to spoil them.
There is much violence toward women in this story although most of it is off the page. Mr. Bennet had a sister who was seduced by a soldier; disowned by her family and died in childbirth along with her offspring. Georgiana has been violated by Wickham; and had long lasting repercussions. Lydia is nearly raped by Wickham and another soldier until Lizzy rescues her and Charlotte Collins is beaten by her husband.
And yet is a a story of different Pride and altered Prejudice. Lizzy feels she will never marry as that her 'accomplishments' are not those of fine society [It is hard to read this and not think... Lizzy would never think this]. She too harbors a secret. Darcy is smitten and wants to marry her but he has some family issues to work out before he can publicly announce their betrothal. While he is off to the continent to find his cousin, the viscount, Lizzy is off to visit Kent. She has no idea that Mr. Darcy is related to Lady Catherine or of his family's expectations for him and Anne. There are more surprises in store for Lizzy. Mr. Collins is even more spectacularly stupid, ignorant and biased than usual. Lady Catherine has invited Lizzy to Kent for a purpose, Anne is truly disabled and a more vile, selfish creature has never existed .
Darcy's arrival at Rosings causes explosions that will echo into eternity. Lizzy ends up helping Georgiana plan her wedding and at least some of them live happily ever after.
Lizzy is quite a bit altered, having served as the defacto steward of Longbourn for the past five years, she is not only an accomplished horsewoman but also an accomplished driver. Lydia and Kitty are the least changed of the Bennet family, both still immature and foolish despite not having had Fanny to spoil them.
There is much violence toward women in this story although most of it is off the page. Mr. Bennet had a sister who was seduced by a soldier; disowned by her family and died in childbirth along with her offspring. Georgiana has been violated by Wickham; and had long lasting repercussions. Lydia is nearly raped by Wickham and another soldier until Lizzy rescues her and Charlotte Collins is beaten by her husband.
And yet is a a story of different Pride and altered Prejudice. Lizzy feels she will never marry as that her 'accomplishments' are not those of fine society [It is hard to read this and not think... Lizzy would never think this]. She too harbors a secret. Darcy is smitten and wants to marry her but he has some family issues to work out before he can publicly announce their betrothal. While he is off to the continent to find his cousin, the viscount, Lizzy is off to visit Kent. She has no idea that Mr. Darcy is related to Lady Catherine or of his family's expectations for him and Anne. There are more surprises in store for Lizzy. Mr. Collins is even more spectacularly stupid, ignorant and biased than usual. Lady Catherine has invited Lizzy to Kent for a purpose, Anne is truly disabled and a more vile, selfish creature has never existed .
Darcy's arrival at Rosings causes explosions that will echo into eternity. Lizzy ends up helping Georgiana plan her wedding and at least some of them live happily ever after.
June 19, 2017
4.5 stars
Mr. Bennet is blind, Mrs. Bennet is dead, so Elizabeth basically manages the estate. Her only moments of solitude and release come when she rides her stallion, Toppur, early in the mornings on a distant and isolated field. It is there she finds her racing matched by Mr. Darcy and his equally formidable mount, Surtur. They soon find themselves looking forward to these clandestine meetings. (Bingley has leased Netherfield and Elizabeth drove the curricle there so Mr. Bennet could introduce himself and welcome him to the neighborhood.)
Darcy (again) fights with himself about the appropriateness of his feelings for Elizabeth. Georgiana’s failed elopement is proving to be of lasting consequences and then there are, of course, his family obligations. He has never stood up to Aunt Catherine’s expectation that he will marry Anne and must resolve that IF he looks elsewhere for a bride.
As Darcy finds Mr. Bennet to be a comfortable chess opponent and conversationalist and EVEN a man with sharp insight into the leaning and expectations of those around him, he is startled when the man gives him permission to pursue his daughter.
It’s amusing to listen in on the conversations in the Bennet family: Elizabeth has taken to assigning animal qualities to new acquaintances: Mr. Bingley is a spaniel puppy, Mrs. Hurst a bittern, and Caroline a gray heron…while Darcy is a black stallion. Sometimes as she gets to know one better the animal identity may change.
Elizabeth considers herself unmarriageable as no man will want to marry a woman who is doing a man’s job: estate management. When Darcy learns of her thoughts he is even more convinced that this is a rare gem: one who is not out to claim compromise when they are riding alone or in other times when they seem to find themselves together…even caught in the rain and seeking shelter. Jane is the one to come to Netherfield to nurse her sister and Mr. Bennet soon shows up to be with his daughters.
But while the cat’s away…Lydia can’t stand that “she never has any fun”, since her father won’t let her “be out” and demands she spend part of her day constructively AND NEVER talk to soldiers. Elizabeth returns home but soon finds herself physically imperiled while attempting to protect her rebellious sister.
The road to ODC's HEA is very rocky. And we even read of an abuse situation.
Mr. Bennet is blind, Mrs. Bennet is dead, so Elizabeth basically manages the estate. Her only moments of solitude and release come when she rides her stallion, Toppur, early in the mornings on a distant and isolated field. It is there she finds her racing matched by Mr. Darcy and his equally formidable mount, Surtur. They soon find themselves looking forward to these clandestine meetings. (Bingley has leased Netherfield and Elizabeth drove the curricle there so Mr. Bennet could introduce himself and welcome him to the neighborhood.)
Darcy (again) fights with himself about the appropriateness of his feelings for Elizabeth. Georgiana’s failed elopement is proving to be of lasting consequences and then there are, of course, his family obligations. He has never stood up to Aunt Catherine’s expectation that he will marry Anne and must resolve that IF he looks elsewhere for a bride.
As Darcy finds Mr. Bennet to be a comfortable chess opponent and conversationalist and EVEN a man with sharp insight into the leaning and expectations of those around him, he is startled when the man gives him permission to pursue his daughter.
It’s amusing to listen in on the conversations in the Bennet family: Elizabeth has taken to assigning animal qualities to new acquaintances: Mr. Bingley is a spaniel puppy, Mrs. Hurst a bittern, and Caroline a gray heron…while Darcy is a black stallion. Sometimes as she gets to know one better the animal identity may change.
Elizabeth considers herself unmarriageable as no man will want to marry a woman who is doing a man’s job: estate management. When Darcy learns of her thoughts he is even more convinced that this is a rare gem: one who is not out to claim compromise when they are riding alone or in other times when they seem to find themselves together…even caught in the rain and seeking shelter. Jane is the one to come to Netherfield to nurse her sister and Mr. Bennet soon shows up to be with his daughters.
But while the cat’s away…Lydia can’t stand that “she never has any fun”, since her father won’t let her “be out” and demands she spend part of her day constructively AND NEVER talk to soldiers. Elizabeth returns home but soon finds herself physically imperiled while attempting to protect her rebellious sister.
The road to ODC's HEA is very rocky. And we even read of an abuse situation.
June 24, 2017
This is a very intriguing unpublished Pride and Prejudice variation by Maria Grace (a.k.a. TuesdayMorning423 on fanfiction.net). While there are various small errors scattered throughout, it's not an excessive amount for an unreleased novel, and Ms. Grace's usual high quality of writing still shines through.
The plot is absolutely unique. Mr. Bennet is blind as the result of a hunting accident when his firearm backfired. Mrs. Bennet is deceased but had a very positive influence on bringing her husband out of his deep melancholy after his horrific accident before she died. Thanks to her forceful direction, he has learned to compensate with his other senses. He is eerily insightful about everything that goes on around him. I especially love Jane's character, as she is developed well beyond the usual dull vanilla into an accomplished peacemaker within the family and among Longbourn's tenants. Elizabeth really is like a son in that she actively manages the estate with her father's guidance and support. The younger sisters also pitch in to help, although Lydia (predictably) chafes at the restrictions Mr. Bennet places on his youngest daughters.
He is especially strict when he learns that a new regiment is coming to Meryton and forbids his family to have anything to do with the officers or their wives, and with good reason. Aunt and Uncle Phillips do not agree with his prohibition, which sets in motion a whole host of problems for the Bennet family.
Darcy, Bingley and Hurst make the acquaintance of Mr. Bennet and Elizabeth, who come to Netherfield on a social call to welcome them to the area. The Bingley sisters, of course, have nothing but criticism of the two, but Darcy shows an unusual sensitivity about Mr. Bennet's condition. He also is drawn immediately to Elizabeth, who shares his affinity for spirited horseback riding as a way of relieving stress.
The title has a double meaning. Elizabeth is certain she can never marry because her training has been in estate management rather than developing all the accomplishments of a gently bred lady. She also harbors a secret that makes her even less suitable to wed a gentleman. She tries to resist falling in love with Darcy though, of course, she does. The title also refers to the situation at Rosings, which is well off-canon. Lady Catherine is still a busybody, but she is not malicious and actually is quite knowledgeable. It's Anne who is particularly difficult, and the big reveal there is a major shocker. Ironically, Lady Catherine recognizes that Elizabeth might have the necessary skills to push her daughter to learn how to behave more appropriately as the future Mistress of Pemberley.
To a lesser extent, the title could even pertain to Georgiana. I do love her character here and the unusual solution agreed to in the aftermath of her error of judgement with Wickham.
Speaking of Wickham, he really gets what's coming to him. Haven't seen him punished in quite this way before, and it's a sobering scene.
This is not quite a 5-star read. Along with the various missing words, duplicated words and other small gaffes that can be corrected easily, the story needs pruning. It's very long.
I also think Elizabeth's stubbornness regarding her unmarriageability persists beyond what is believable, especially considering her vigorous argument with Georgiana when the parallels in their situations are just too, too obvious. While it's often easy to give advice that we don't follow ourselves, Elizabeth's character is too discerning not to recognize that she's been hearing from others the same exact things she tells Georgiana.
Overall, this has a marvelous plot with the potential to become another fantastic Maria Grace novel should she ever decide to work on it a little more and publish.
The plot is absolutely unique. Mr. Bennet is blind as the result of a hunting accident when his firearm backfired. Mrs. Bennet is deceased but had a very positive influence on bringing her husband out of his deep melancholy after his horrific accident before she died. Thanks to her forceful direction, he has learned to compensate with his other senses. He is eerily insightful about everything that goes on around him. I especially love Jane's character, as she is developed well beyond the usual dull vanilla into an accomplished peacemaker within the family and among Longbourn's tenants. Elizabeth really is like a son in that she actively manages the estate with her father's guidance and support. The younger sisters also pitch in to help, although Lydia (predictably) chafes at the restrictions Mr. Bennet places on his youngest daughters.
He is especially strict when he learns that a new regiment is coming to Meryton and forbids his family to have anything to do with the officers or their wives, and with good reason. Aunt and Uncle Phillips do not agree with his prohibition, which sets in motion a whole host of problems for the Bennet family.
Darcy, Bingley and Hurst make the acquaintance of Mr. Bennet and Elizabeth, who come to Netherfield on a social call to welcome them to the area. The Bingley sisters, of course, have nothing but criticism of the two, but Darcy shows an unusual sensitivity about Mr. Bennet's condition. He also is drawn immediately to Elizabeth, who shares his affinity for spirited horseback riding as a way of relieving stress.
The title has a double meaning. Elizabeth is certain she can never marry because her training has been in estate management rather than developing all the accomplishments of a gently bred lady. She also harbors a secret that makes her even less suitable to wed a gentleman. She tries to resist falling in love with Darcy though, of course, she does. The title also refers to the situation at Rosings, which is well off-canon. Lady Catherine is still a busybody, but she is not malicious and actually is quite knowledgeable. It's Anne who is particularly difficult, and the big reveal there is a major shocker. Ironically, Lady Catherine recognizes that Elizabeth might have the necessary skills to push her daughter to learn how to behave more appropriately as the future Mistress of Pemberley.
To a lesser extent, the title could even pertain to Georgiana. I do love her character here and the unusual solution agreed to in the aftermath of her error of judgement with Wickham.
Speaking of Wickham, he really gets what's coming to him. Haven't seen him punished in quite this way before, and it's a sobering scene.
This is not quite a 5-star read. Along with the various missing words, duplicated words and other small gaffes that can be corrected easily, the story needs pruning. It's very long.
I also think Elizabeth's stubbornness regarding her unmarriageability persists beyond what is believable, especially considering her vigorous argument with Georgiana when the parallels in their situations are just too, too obvious. While it's often easy to give advice that we don't follow ourselves, Elizabeth's character is too discerning not to recognize that she's been hearing from others the same exact things she tells Georgiana.
Overall, this has a marvelous plot with the potential to become another fantastic Maria Grace novel should she ever decide to work on it a little more and publish.
June 24, 2017
“If only… the saddest words in the English language.” Kristan Higgins, My One and Only
Please read the most excellent reviews by Sheila, Leslie and Debbie. They have said it much better than I, in regard to this unpublished work.
This was so very creative. It was heart wrenching as we watched Elizabeth declare that she was un-marriageable, unfeminine and that no man would want her. Famous last words. There is always someone for everyone… even this Elizabeth. I don’t think I’ve seen as many twists and turns in one story as there were in this one. Man, just when you think it is safe to enter the water… lawd another tragedy and I do mean tragedy. This was so creative. Well done.
Please read the most excellent reviews by Sheila, Leslie and Debbie. They have said it much better than I, in regard to this unpublished work.
This was so very creative. It was heart wrenching as we watched Elizabeth declare that she was un-marriageable, unfeminine and that no man would want her. Famous last words. There is always someone for everyone… even this Elizabeth. I don’t think I’ve seen as many twists and turns in one story as there were in this one. Man, just when you think it is safe to enter the water… lawd another tragedy and I do mean tragedy. This was so creative. Well done.
April 20, 2021
This is at least my third reading of this book which I first came across on FanFiction.net. In this Pride and Prejudice variation, Mrs. Bennet has been dead for five years. Ten years ago, Mr. Bennet was blinded and nearly killed when his gun misfired while he was hunting. When Bingley and his sisters come to Netherfield, they bring a rather dour Mr. Darcy with them, and somehow Mr. Bennet, who allows no one but his daughters to assist him, takes to Darcy and allows his assistance. Elizabeth assists her father in running the farm, tracking the finances, etc., while Jane runs the household in her mother's place.
At dawn, Elizabeth often sneaks off to race her father's supposedly "unrideable" stallion in a fallow field, and when Darcy sees her racing astride, he can't help but join her, racing his stallion against hers. They quickly find that they have much in common, especially since he is not shocked by her discussions of crop rotation and other farming topics that the Bingley sisters claim make her unrefined. Darcy and Bennet start playing chess (which Mr. Bennet can play from memory even without a board) and all of the men become increasingly impressed by Mr. Bennet's ability to live a practically normal life despite his blindness.
Darcy and Elizabeth start falling for each other right away, but complications arise and much more occurs, both in Meryton and at Rosings Park, and later, London. It's a heartwrenching and heartwarming novel simultaneously, and it's well-worth reading!!
This book has become one of my go-to "comfort reads" when life becomes too challenging and a bit of warmth and joy is needed. It's definitely a page-turner in many places as well. I highly recommend ... and if you have not read my reviews before, please know that I usually save "5" ratings for classic novels such as Jane Eyre, etc. Only a few modern books receive a "5" from me, including the entire Jane Austen's Dragons series. ;)
At dawn, Elizabeth often sneaks off to race her father's supposedly "unrideable" stallion in a fallow field, and when Darcy sees her racing astride, he can't help but join her, racing his stallion against hers. They quickly find that they have much in common, especially since he is not shocked by her discussions of crop rotation and other farming topics that the Bingley sisters claim make her unrefined. Darcy and Bennet start playing chess (which Mr. Bennet can play from memory even without a board) and all of the men become increasingly impressed by Mr. Bennet's ability to live a practically normal life despite his blindness.
Darcy and Elizabeth start falling for each other right away, but complications arise and much more occurs, both in Meryton and at Rosings Park, and later, London. It's a heartwrenching and heartwarming novel simultaneously, and it's well-worth reading!!
This book has become one of my go-to "comfort reads" when life becomes too challenging and a bit of warmth and joy is needed. It's definitely a page-turner in many places as well. I highly recommend ... and if you have not read my reviews before, please know that I usually save "5" ratings for classic novels such as Jane Eyre, etc. Only a few modern books receive a "5" from me, including the entire Jane Austen's Dragons series. ;)
October 3, 2019
This unpublished work kept my attention as Elizabeth is walking around with a huge chip on her shoulder that she just can't seem to get past. With her mother deceased and her father with a handicap, the story doesn't really allow anyone to feel sorry for themselves. Darcy is wonderful and patient, but he and his family have some demons haunting them as well. Elizabeth has to get out of her way to find love and to understand where she fits.
There are some selfish and evil people in this story. I would say it should have a physical abuse warning. That being said, it is not graphic but implied with post event recollection and injury reports.
The story is amazingly emotional as I cried 2x, which I love!
There are some selfish and evil people in this story. I would say it should have a physical abuse warning. That being said, it is not graphic but implied with post event recollection and injury reports.
The story is amazingly emotional as I cried 2x, which I love!
July 1, 2024
Warning: Contains many abuses against women.
Very interesting premise. I loved this Mr.Bennet. But I found both Darcy and Elizabeth, especially Elizabeth extremely frustrating. There are many new fascinating dimensions added to our dear and not so dear characters which adds a different dimension to the story.
Very interesting premise. I loved this Mr.Bennet. But I found both Darcy and Elizabeth, especially Elizabeth extremely frustrating. There are many new fascinating dimensions added to our dear and not so dear characters which adds a different dimension to the story.
November 23, 2024
Reread it in 2024 for buzzword challenge. It's an interesting twist on a story but has lots of triggering moments both in present and in the past. Both Darcy and Elizabeth guards family secrets and this postpones their HEA final. I liked Darcy here a lot. Like he just doesn't give up. And he fights for both of them. Good.
September 24, 2012
Read this novel on FanFiction.net (total of 42 chapters) - With Mrs Bennett deceased and Mr. Bennett blind, the Bennett sisters must rally together to manage an estate and take care of all things. Bingley and Darcy still come upon Netherfield with love in the air. The pathway to Darcy and Elizabeth's love is a long and at times painful. Do not get deceived when you discover how quickly they become engaged as all the troubles result afterwards. A good read indeed! Hopefully one day we will see it published!
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