Hot Buttons Sexuality Edition

Hot Buttons #3

by Nicole O'Dell

From substance abuse to temptation, relationships to breakups, peer pressure to popularity, teens face all sorts of tough issues. How teens respond to these challenges will influence their future, possibly define their future, maybe even determine whether they have a future or not. What if parents could help their teens prepare for these hot buttons-before the issues arise? Now they can, and in a way that's serious but fun, direct but nonconfrontational, and abundantly beneficial to the parentteen relationship. These two new editions in the popular Hot Buttons Series each offer creative scenarios, discussion points, and Bible verses to help parents create conversation on difficult topics.

"Hot Buttons Sexuality Edition" offers: the facts about teen sexuality, backed by statistics; specifics for how to talk frankly about sex with your kids, discussion about the growth of homosexuality and bisexuality among teens; and compassionate advice for guiding your teen to reclaim purity.

The Hot Buttons Series continues to be a quick-reference resource that parents can use to safeguard their children from today's negative influences.

172 pages, Paperback

First published October 1, 2012

About the author

Nicole O'Dell, Choose NOW Ministries
...battling peer pressure by tackling the tough issues

Youth-culture expert, Nicole O’Dell, resides in Paxton, Illinois, with her husband and six children—the youngest of which are toddler triplets. She’s the founder of Choose NOW Ministries, dedicated to battling peer pressure and guiding teens through tough issues while helping parents encourage good decisions, and host of Choose NOW Radio: Parent Talk and Teen Talk, where “It's all about choices!” On air, O’Dell covers peer pressure, dating, purity, drugs, alcohol, modesty, popularity, and anything else that comes up along the way.  Nicole writes and speaks to preteens, teenagers, and parents about how to prepare for life's tough choices.

 

She’s author of YA fiction, including the popular Scenarios for Girls interactive fiction, which offers readers alternate endings, allowing them to decide what the main character does, and the Diamond Estates Series based on her experiences as a resident at Teen Challenge as a teenager. Her non-fiction for teens includes Girl Talk, 2/1/12, which she wrote with her two daughters based on their popular advice column.

 

Nicole’s desire to bridge the gap between parents and teens is evident in her parenting non-fiction like the Hot Buttons , series aimed at helping parents handle tough issues with their tweens and teens before they pop up in real life. Watch for Hot Buttons books on subjects like dating, Internet activity, sexuality, prejudice, friendships, politics, and many more.

For more information on Nicole O’Dell or her books, or to schedule Nicole for a speaking event or interview, visit http://www.nicoleodell.com. Podcasts of Choose NOW Radio are available at http://www.chooseNOWradio.com.

Reviews

[Jillyn · Rating 1 out of 5]

I received this through Goodreads First Reads.

I can't possibly review this fully without saying mean things that I'll regret, so I'll keep it short.

First, I didn't realize that this was a Christian/faith based books. And that, frankly, is my fault. Had I known, I wouldn't have bothered entering for it.

Long story short, this book is full of paraphrased/updated Bible quotes applied to sexual relationships. This book stresses a "pure until marriage" lifestyle and quite honestly, doesn't do a good job in answering the so-called "important questions" that teens "are asking."

But, the reason I will never recommend this book is for the homosexuality chapter. While I respect the overall message of "Jesus loved the sinner, just not the sin", I think it's absurd that the author suggests things such as prohibiting tv or movies that portray homosexuality in a positive light, limiting friendships with gay friends, and prohibiting your children from getting into a situation that may "tempt them to try out a homosexual relationship." Seriously?

If you're a Christian, maybe this book will mean something to you. If you're gay or non-Christian, don't even bother reading the first page.

[Andrew · Rating 5 out of 5]

Let me just go ahead and say that I am not in the target audience yet for these parenting series books. I am only twenty-two, not married yet, and I don't have any children or teenagers. But I hope to one day be a husband and a father. That's why I'm already reading this series.

In the Sexuality Edition, Nicole O'Dell shared with parents the issues that our teenagers are being tempted by satan about their sexuality. The book covered hot buttons like vaginal intercourse, anal intercourse, oral sex, and mutual masturbation. Most of the descriptions are brief and they don't get to technical and I know parents get a little worried and embarrassed discussing the concept of sex to your teenagers. Some parents even decide to just let the school system teach sex education. I personally think some do this because they are afraid they won't be able to answer their children questions regarding sex. Why not at least education our children, and even if your children ask you something you don't know, then tell be honest and tell them I will find out answer and explain it to you. Sometimes we let the church explain the importance of waiting until their married to have sex. But it's our job and responsibly to lead our children the way Christ has instilled for us to do. I immensely liked how Nicole pointed out would you rather let your friends or the internet tell our children the acts that our considered sex. It's important to realize that vaginal intercourse, anal intercourse, oral sex, and mutual masturbation are all sex!

One of the biggest things that the book presented was overcoming and exposing the lie that the first time, you have sexual intercourse you won't get pregnant or get someone pregnant. This is completely untrue anytime you have vaginal intercourse it can result in pregnancy. There is one way that we have to teach our teenagers and that is abstinence is the only way that is 100 effective. The book shared all the different forms of birth control, including the one most teenagers like to use, you got it the withdraw method (which isn't safe). The book pointed out the risks of getting an STD from the result of unprotected sex and if the condom breaks you can still get one and possible could get pregnant. The book also talked to the parents who take the stance, I will just get my teenage daughter(s) on the pill it's better to be safe than sorry. But as a future father, I can't comprehend doing something like that. I would personally feel like I am endorsing for her to engage in sexual intercourse. Now let's me flip it around, I also couldn't see myself handing my son(s) a condom and saying if you're going to have sex here, wear this. I understand that talking about sex to our children can be daunting. But it's worth talking about! I know it's my job as a parent to lead my children in the Father's ways and when they fail to extend forgiveness.

I would recommend this book series to any parent wanting to protect their teenagers from the hidden dangers of the internet, sexuality, dating, and drug use. Parents need to teach their sons to respect girls and not to use them. Girls also need to be taught not to play around with boy's hearts. It's vital we teach our children the foundations of great relationships now so eventually when they enter into marriage, they know how to treat their spouse. The book taught so many details and scenarios that I have never even considered that could be something my teenagers might have to face.

The scenarios section in each book contained 13-15 different scenarios per book. Parents would then describe the real life story to the teenagers, and then the teenagers would choose which ever multiply choice answer they would have done in that story. I loved that Nicole coached the parents to not freak out on whatever response their children gave them. These life lessons aren't meant to preach to your teenagers. It's meant to connect and understand what your children are thinking. Then you can guide them to the correct choice slowly. If you're looking for guidance on how to parent then this series could significantly benefit you! It has opened my eyes to the truth and I plan on doing this with my own children someday! If you're a parent, get this series, and do it with your children!

"I received this book for free from Litfuse Publicity Group/ Kregel Publications for this review".

[Laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

Nicole O’Dell’s Hot Button Editions can help parents, even timid parents, to become prepared, watchful and proactive with their tweens and teens in the four following areas:

Internet use
Drug abuse
Dating guidelines
Sexuality and purity
(Bullying and Image Editions will release in 2013)

Nicole exudes confidence in her books to parents in helping them learn how to initiate conversations with their young people for their own personal safety, their ability to stand strong against peer pressure, and live a Godly life. Scripture is generously used to combat the lies Satan puts in our children’s minds and to help parents teach and demonstrate Godly lifestyles.

Nicole answers the Why, When and How in each book as they speaks directly to the issues at hand, which are the prepared, watchful, and proactive stances listed above. I found this information vital for parents to know, as well as to process with their tween/teen.

The section under identifying the issue goes into greater detail, giving parents a great resource tool to open discussions with their children and to counsel them in the ways of God. And we all know as parents how hard it can be to open up discussions on these difficult issues at times with our teens.

The third section includes protective procedures, the armor of God and strategic scenarios to work through with their young people, helping them to prepare beforehand to stand up to peer pressure, drug pushers, dating pressures, and learning how they can control their own sexuality. I particularly think the strategic scenarios are a great tool to help their son/daughter to think through scenarios before they are enticed. Using the armor of God as parents and individually by the son/daughter will help them stand stronger.

Nicole O’Dell gives us a lot of great advice and information. If you have young people at home, start early to teach them Godly truths for these issues. Don’t leave it to the schools or church to do your parental duty. After all, God gave them to you to raise and teach them to walk in His ways. You CAN do it!

I believe every parent needs to get these Hot Button books. Remember, they are teaching sex education as early as kindergarten. Be proactive and reach your children for the Lord and His Godly ways before society and the media lead them down wrong and painful paths. These issues are close to my heart, and I thank Nicole for writing these practical, wise books for parents.

Praying for your children is parenting at its best! (Carrie, BSF leader)

These four books were provided free by Amy Lathrop of Litfuse Publicity Group in exchange for my honest opinion. No monetary compensation was received.

[Kaylea · Rating 3 out of 5]

(Note: This refers to all four of O'Dell's Hot Button Editions)

Fill in the blank.

I don't know how to talk to my tween about_______.

...Sex

...Internet Safety

... Pornography

...Dating

...Drugs

...All Of The Above.

There's a lot of topics parents in my children's ministry struggle to talk about.

I'm always looking to find a resource I can pass along to them, to help start a conversation at home - between parent and child.

It's not easy, but it's important.Actually, it's quite vital. At times, the conversation might even make a difference between life and death.

Nicole O'Dell has created four (two more are pending) books that address the "Hot Button" topics in a tween's life - before they become a problem.

From dating to drugs, modesty to purity, morals to popularity and more - O'Dell tackles the tough issues in her four books: Hot Buttons: Dating Edition, Hot Buttons: Internet Edition; Hot Buttons: Sexuality Edition and Hot Button: Dating Edition.

Each book dives into the topic, lays a foundation for how a parent can discuss the issue, and then tackles some of the "hot" pieces.

The books are small - and could easily fit in a purse or backpack. Each book provides short scenarios and three or four responses a teen might talk about in a particular situation.

I found the books (I dove into the Sexuality Edition and Internet Edition specifically) to be interesting. They may not be comprehensive - OK, let's face it, what book can cover EVERYTHING about a topic. But they are a solid resource that a parent can use.

I found the Internet Edition interesting, because she identified four websites that tweens and teens like to use, away from the "favorites" (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram).

I also thought the Sexuality Edition was frank, honest and not preachy.

I also liked the study guide, O'Dell included in the back of each book. The goal - another way students and parents can tackle an issue in a non-threatening way.

In all, I'll keep these books as a resource for parents. On the scale of one to five, I give them a solid three and half. Ultimately, these books aren't the definitive solution to an issue - but they are a tool parents can use to start a conversation with their student.

FYI - Bullying and Image Editions are coming in Spring 2013. Considering how many of my tweens are struggling with bullying at school this fall, I'm definitely going to check it out when it's published.

Note: As a freelance journalist (and children's pastor), I was provided a copy of these books by Litfuse Publicity Group. This review was not influenced by a free book - just in case you (or the FTC) were worried about this detail.

[Laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

Title: HOT BUTTONS series
Author: Nicole O’Dell
Publisher: Kregel Publications
2012
Genre: parenting of young adults and teens

Dating edition ISBN: 978-0-8254-4240-7
Internet edition ISBN: 978-0-8254-4239-9
Drug edition ISBN: 978-0-8254-4241-4
Sexuality edition ISBN: 978-0-8254-4242-1

Nicole O’Dell is a teen expert—and she knows the challenges today’s teen’s face. In the HOT BUTTONS SERIES: Dating edition, Drug Edition, Internet edition, and Sexuality edition, she addresses these challenges and more.

The world has changed since us parents were teenagers and our teens face things that we never dreamed of. According to Ms. O’Dell, 1 out of 5 teenagers are physically abused by their boyfriends. That’s a pretty shocking statistic! And with teens having unlimited access to the internet, mostly unsupervised, considering smart phones, iPads, personal computers, and more, they can get into a world of trouble on the web.

Plus, there’s drugs—readily available anywhere. Kids know who do drugs—and where to get them. They are offered them even in small towns. And sexuality—teens struggle with purity when the school encourages sex by passing out condoms. Homosexuality is rampant. And what about revealing photos of his best friend’s girlfriend stored on his friend’s phone?

Teens face all these issues and more. We, as parents, pastors, teachers, or youth leaders need to be aware of what is going on in the world we live in and discuss this with the teens God has entrusted with us. Not only that, but the short discussion questions are good topics to discuss as a group, one on one, and definitely used as a teaching tool. Even if your child KNOWS the correct answer (in some cases, it’s pretty obvious) find out why they chose that, and to expound on the answer so it’s cemented in their heads.

Excellent series, recommended to anyone with teens or who work with youth. $9.99. 160 pages.

[Cheri Swalwell · Rating 5 out of 5]

I had the privilege of reading a fantastic book by Nicole O’Dell, titled, Hot Buttons: Sexuality Edition. It was perfect for our family.

I’m of the mentality that I have been introducing discussions about “hot buttons” in our home since our kids were little and no topic is off limits for our kids to come and ask about. However, just because I’m willing to talk about these things, doesn’t mean I know all that our kids are faced with or all that needs to be discussed. I lived a fairly sheltered life and therefore, having some guidance in how, when, and different ways to get my kids to open up or ways to create an atmosphere where they will be more receptive to discussions was invaluable to me.

This book is easy to read, easy to understand, and easy to implement into life. I absolutely love the Strategic Scenarios in the back of the book that invite conversations, are neutral (meaning ways to get your kids thinking about what could happen before it’s something that already has happened and therefore emotions would be much higher and reactions stronger), and just plain fun.

I would recommend these books to anyone who has children and wants to be proactive in their parenting years. In my opinion, it’s better to equip a child ahead of time with the tools they will need to succeed than to have to backpedal once the damage has already been done, sometimes changing their lives permanently. STDs and pregnancy are just a few of the ways that kids can permanently alter the plan that God has for their lives. It doesn’t mean they can’t be forgiven or can’t change a dangerous path they are headed down, but it’s so much easier and less heartbreaking to stay on the better path to begin with than to have to turn around and change directions.

[Heather · Rating 5 out of 5]

This makes a great companion to the Dating Edition of this series. While the other focuses primarily on boy-girl relationships, this one focuses on sex. Not just sexual intercourse, but other equally charged acts. It also covers homosexuality. This was a real eye-opener for me, so far as just how hard it is nowadays to help our children remain pure for their spouse. The great thing is it encourages parents to talk frankly – but without too much detail – with your kids. There are suggestions for brief explanations of things like oral sex, anal intercourse, and more. Parents are encouraged to ask their kids for followup questions, to see if there are any misunderstandings that need to be straightened out. Finally, there is a section about helping your teen recover his or her purity.

As with the previous books, I really liked the Strategic Scenarios section. This gives both parents and teens a chance to really think through some sticky situations. Since these can be done at home, teens can choose “wrong” and avoid the negative repercussions. It is something I’ll definitely be working through with my kids as they get a bit older.

[Wendy · Rating 4 out of 5]

When our kids become teenagers there are conversations that we need to have with them about everything from relationships to drug use. These conversations can be a challenge for those of us who aren't really sure what to say or how to say it. Nicole O'Dell addresses these issues in her Hot Buttons Series of books. She not only provides ways to have the conversations, but also the scripture to go along with each one.
As a mom of two teenagers, I am constantly looking for resources to help me lead my sons in these areas and to engage them in an honest conversation about each one.
This is the best one I have found yet.
I highly recommend this series of books to parents of preteens and teens.

[Ruth Hill · Rating 5 out of 5]

I cannot recommend this series of books highly enough. My daughter is not quite a teen, but I read the entire series. This one deals with sexuality, and I love the fact that there are scenarios, up-to-date information, and a parent-teen study guide. There is practical information for every parent, and the author is not afraid to share her mistakes with her readers. I have read many books about some of the issues covered in these books, but I have not found one that made so much sense and was so Biblically based. I am setting these aside, and I am sure within the next year or two, these books will come in handy since my daughter is almost a pre-teen.

I was sent a copy of this book in exchange for my honest review. I was not financially compensated, and all opinions are 100 percent mine.

[Dats · Rating 5 out of 5]

I thought this was an excellent book. Tells ya how to talk to your kids regarding sexual issues. This book is needed. Parents don't know how to say and what to say. Plus it is an uncomfortable thing for both sides. I think parents can us all the help they can get. I won this book through Good Reads and appreciate it. Thank you.

[Cara Putman · Rating 4 out of 5]

In the Hot Buttons series, Nicole O'Dell has written a series of books that address the big issues with scriptural wisdom and the information to equip us with the information to have those conversations. Avoidance isn't the recipe for success. So let's open these books and get started with parenting our tweens and teens.

[MelAnnD · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a great book for parents!!!
There's a lot of topics parents struggle to talk about with their children. I'm always looking to find a resource I can pass along to my children or to help start a conversation at home with them . It's not easy, but it's important.


Won on goodreads.

[Toby · Rating 3 out of 5]

first reads giveaway