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You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!: A Self-Help Book for Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder
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You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!: A Self-Help Book for Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder

4.01  ·  Rating details ·  1,855 ratings  ·  102 reviews
With "You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!, " Kelly and Ramundo bring together their considerable personal and professional experiences to create the essential guide to identifying, understanding and managing the dynamics of ADD in adults.
Paperback, 464 pages
Published January 16th 1996 by Scribner Book Company (first published 1993)
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 ·  1,855 ratings  ·  102 reviews

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Start your review of You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!: A Self-Help Book for Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder
Michele Harrod
Jul 05, 2010 rated it it was amazing
Thanks. This is all I can say to these authors. Talk about pick a book up, and suddenly understand your whole life. And yes, I did think that, and yes, I have since been tested ADHD positive, at my ripe old age of 44. Never even knew such a thing existed in Adults. The discovery and the journey of self understanding, forgiveness and learning new ways to live, have been utterly life changing and amazing. Wow, I really wasn't lazy, crazy or stupid! Very cool.
Aug 31, 2010 rated it liked it
Kind of ironically, I'm going to call this one too scattered. I get that when they started, this was a work by not-so-professionals trying to get the word out when zero other material existed on the market, so they tried to cover absolutely everything.

However: SO many anecdotes thrown in for a paragraph at a time and then referred to 300 pages later, so many that you kind of lose track of anything so many different types of "ADDers" are actually supposed to have in common with each other. So
James Oliver
It's the first book I read on ADD so I guess the initial favourable impression was just a kind of 'ah, at last I am not alone' kind of recognition. However, I've liked it less as time passes. It is badly organised and set out with far too many exclamation marks and EMPHASIS!!! It's a real 'victim' book.

One thing that is good is that it outlines the various 'sub-types' of ADDers - ADD symptoms manifest themselves in different kinds of behaviours among different types of people. It's not just
Emma Sea
Well, who knows if I have ADD or not, but certainly the strategies I have in place so I can cope with life are exactly the same strategies the authors recommend for ADD. (Except meditation. I read a lot of books that suggest meditation, and I'm so resistant to the idea and I do not know why.)

But to some extent aren't these just strategies that all adults use to get stuff done and keep sane? SCHEDULE! Time track. Use notebooks to record everything (Evernote is the greatest invention in the
Jul 30, 2010 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Finally, I'm not alone. For years I thought I was crazy. I thought if I tell anyone what its like inside my head, surely they'll have me committed. So I kept quiet. It wasn't until my kids were diagnosed with ADHD and my daughter explained to me what its like in her head, that I realized I had ADD. I still wasn't sure what that meant, so I went looking for books. The title of this one immediately caught my attention, but I was sure the information contained inside couldn't possibly live up to ...more
I can see why this was recommended to me by so many people. It's a good, friendly guide for people who've been diagnosed with ADHD as an adult. Occasionally it's a bit dated, especially some of the organizational advice, but overall I found it super helpful and appreciated the cheerful tone.
Amy Rhoda  Brown
Starting right from the awkward title, this book is showing its age. Written back in the nineties (when it was apparently the only ADD book) it tries to cover all the conceivable angles of the ADD life in one dense tome. It's text heavy, with narrow margins and clunky visual design, leavened only by some unattractive and often irrelevant cartoons.

It's 2016 and you can now read books — or at least articles —about every conceivable concern for people with AD/HD: AD/HD in the workplace, AD/HD in
Marti Dumas
The book was well-organized and the voice was genuine. If I had read it when it was originally published years ago, I probably would have found it informative. Unfortunately, I was hoping to gain some insight into ADD for adults and I didn't learn anything that I didn't already know. I'd give it 2 stars because the Goodreads label says 2 stars= "It was okay," but that seems like a pretty low rating for a book that does have pertinent information despite not being helpful for me.
Adrienne Campbell
Aug 28, 2012 rated it it was amazing
It's been 19 years since I read this book but I know it helped me understand who I am and how my brain works. It was wonderful to read a book that made sense to me. I could totally relate! When you've spent most of your life either being told or believing you are lazy, crazy or's a wonderful relief to know you are not alone. And no, I'm not Lazy, Crazy, or Stupid!
Gavin Sharma
Mar 03, 2016 rated it did not like it
This is not a book. It's a joke really. Looks like the author cut out an article or two from COSMOPOLITAN and then paid someone a few hundred dollars to increase the number of total words so she could have it published as a book.

Utter waste of time (and money).
Sep 01, 2010 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Overall, I think this is a valuable resource for people trying to understand how either they or someone they love can be so many contradictory things at once. Scattered, but then hyperfocused on a new passion. How an intelligent person can be brillant in one moment, then unable to collect his/her thoughts enough to figure out what to make for dinner.

As a professional, I recommend the book, although different people respond better than others. Some can soar through it, amazed by the insights
Dec 28, 2010 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
OMG! This is the BEST book ever for anyone with ADD/ADHD! And especially for those with ADD who have been reading self-help books for years, attempting to improve themselves.

The authors cover everything associated with this disorder and give practical advice on dealing with everyday life; i.e. organization, sexual functioning, medication interactions, memory training, etc.

Even if you are not personally affected with the disorder, you probably know a loved one or a friend who is and it will
Matthew MacKay
Jan 20, 2011 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: People with ADD/ADHD
For someone who recently self-diagnosed themselves with the condition, the book has been nothing short of miraculous. The relatibilty to the characters exemplified so well in the book, the easy to understand breakdown of the strengths and weaknesses (pitfalls) of the condition, and the numerous suggestions the book gives for solutions to problems the ADDer has in life, make this book one of my favorites—if not, my favorite. If you have ADD/ADHD, or believe you do, I HIGHLY recommend you read ...more
Nov 28, 2008 rated it liked it
Recommends it for: anyone who is dealing with ADD in themselves or others.
The most helpful things about this book were the extensive case studies and examples of people and how ADD affected their lives in many different ways. I think also the drug sections and therapy possibilities were interesting and brief. However, the book could have benefited from some serious editing. And the strategies to help ADDers with organization and other areas where they need help were not well organized or nearly extensive enough.
Crazy Uncle Ryan
Apr 23, 2008 rated it really liked it
I really found this book to be helpful. This book taught me a lot about ADD and I found out that much of what I had been told about the condition when I was first diagnosed as a kid had been proven wrong. I also liked the simple, practical advice it provided.
Apr 09, 2014 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I absolutely love this book. It is one of the first that really spoke to my ADD issues.
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Lauren Williams
Dec 16, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Written with Sympathy

Anyone who thinks s/he has ADD/ADHD, anyone who knows s/he has ADD/ADHD, and anyone who is close, personally or professionally, with someone who has ADD/ADHD can benefit from this book. It's a great first step to understanding the possible symptoms and effects of the disorder. It's a great first step to admitting you might be affected by the disorder. It's a map for getting help and helping yourself. What makes it so valuable is the fact that it's written by two women who
Courtney Bowling
Mar 08, 2018 rated it really liked it
I have the first edition of this book. It is really a phenomenal read for any adult with ADHD. If you're already well-read on ADHD it may not produce any information that is life-changing, but the perspectives and humor are very refreshing. Even though the edition I read is a couple decades old, and the references to fax machines, Rolodexes, answering machines, and so on are a bit outdated, you can easily substitute modern technology in the anecdotes. I would give this book 5 stars if it were a ...more
Nov 24, 2019 rated it did not like it
I really struggled with this book and ended up not even being able to finish it. While I am sure it may be helpful for some, I couldn't help but feel like it was providing excuses for individuals who struggle with certain social/cultural norms and expectations. I agree that it is important for each of us to know our worth and be okay with our differences and find ways to maximize our strengths while minimizing our weaknesses. However, I generally enjoy books that are more about taking ...more
Jan 21, 2019 rated it did not like it
Shelves: dnf
Honestly . . ? Some things hit hard. And I thought it was because I was actually finding some sort of kinship with this book. But the more I read, the more I felt like the authors were just including everything in it—including all the contradictions between behaviour.

It didn't give me any new revelations, and the coping strategies were meh.
Aug 01, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: owned
This book was recommended by my psychiatrist, and it really explains a lot. I've read it over multiple times, and have gone back for more, because it's just so full of helpful knowledge to learn to live with ADHD as an adult.
Sep 04, 2018 rated it it was amazing
You know the signs of a solid book when you have to continue pausing to think about implications and how things the back to your own life and behaviors. I've taken copious pages of notes and plan to re-read this book again to capture more ways to help myself and my ADHD.
Mar 25, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: nonfiction, self-help
Really good book for people who have been diagnosed or have a loved one diagnosed with ADHD. Amazing resource with multiple options, not just medication. Highly recommended.
May 02, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Very helpful.
Christopher Cavanaugh
If you're unsure if you have ADD, read this book

Quick, easy, insightful read about the lives of those of us living with ADD. Helpful checklists of symptoms and practical interventions for them. Will recommend to others.
Apr 27, 2019 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: non-fiction, 2019-en
Sometimes you might need help and it's 100% okay to ask for it. This is a kind of help.
And plenty of information.
Feb 02, 2018 rated it did not like it
worthless. a complete waste of time
David Gamble
Jan 23, 2019 rated it it was amazing
It's a great book; I don't know what else to say. lol
It's a little on the wordy side, if I'm looking really hard for a complaint, but I have to think about it.
There are great tips on treatment options that are remarkably unbiased compared to other things I've read, pointers for families (both planning and running), help on relationships and things to keep an eye out for or do differently, and it even ends on a 'pros to ADD.' Overall really useful and pleasant to boot.
Apr 17, 2019 rated it it was ok
This was not the book for me- it is very basic basics. I am still looking for my 201 level book, but this not it.
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Librarian Note: There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name.

Kate Kelly is a clinical specialist in psychiatric nursing who leads therapy groups for ADDults. She lectures widely and is a featured presenter at most major ADD conferences. (from
“The Procrastinator has the opposite problem. He can’t selectively focus his attention and might endure frequent accusations about his laziness. In truth, he’s so distracted by stimuli that he can’t figure out where or how to get started. Sounds, smells, sights and the random wanderings of his thoughts continually vie for his attention.” 4 likes
“When Too Much Isn’t Enough. With” 0 likes
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