Исцеляющие беседы

by Ilse Sand, Илсе Санд

Когда близкому человеку нелегко, у него трудности в жизни, стресс или депрессия, самое простое, чем мы можем ему помочь, это поговорить с ним. Но как сделать так, чтобы разговор действительно пошел на пользу? Илсе Санд — психотерапевт и автор бестселлеров «С любовью к себе» и «Близко к сердцу» рассказывает, как сделать откровенный, сердечный разговор по-настоящему исцеляющим. Она объясняет, когда стоит проявить инициативу, а когда — помолчать и послушать; что нужно спрашивать и как реагировать на ответы; почему не стоит становиться жилеткой для чужих слез и в каких ситуациях уместна прямота, а в каких — примеры и аналогии. Эта книга поможет читателям развить эмпатию и научиться помогать другим.

176 pages, Hardcover

Published January 1, 2023

About the author

For many years Ilse Sand has been engaged in counseling highly sensitive people both as a pastor and as a psychotherapist.

Before she became a psychotherapist, public speaker and author, Ilse worked as parish pastor under the Danish National Church for eleven years until 2006.

lIlse Sand has a Master’s Degree in Theology from Aarhus University, where her Master’s thesis was based on the works of Swiss Psychiatrist C.G. Jung and Danish Philosopher Søren Kierkegaard. The works of Jung and Kierkegaard has had an impact on both her personal life as well as her professional life and writing.

Through her work as a pastor, Ilse Sand became interested in helping people on a deeper level, and she became educated in psychotherapy within Gestalt Therapy, Cognitive Therapy and Psycho Dynamic Therapy among others.

Reviews

[Ale · Rating 5 out of 5]

ITA
Questo libro, nei suoi 15 capitoli, presenta diversi livelli da considerare se la persona che legge vuole aiutare qualcuno tramite la conversazione.
Come nel libro della stessa autrice letto in precedenza, “See yourself with the friendly eyes, How to let go of guilt”, ogni capitolo è abbastanza breve. Offre una introduzione che contestualizza l'argomento del capitolo, a supporto vengono citati uno o più esempi e, infine, si trova il riassunto.
Mentre il primo libro l'ho trovato molto realistico, l’ho capito con più facilità, in questo caso non riuscivo sempre a immaginarmi o a capire bene a cosa si riferiva il capitolo.
Mi è piaciuto comunque che nel libro in due punti diversi Ilse focalizza l'attenzione sulla persona che offre aiuto, quella che ascolta, supporta, o consiglia l'altro. Ho apprezzato molto che abbia esplicitato di far attenzione a quanto la persona è in grado di aiutare, di ascoltare e che queste persone siano supportate a loro volta.
Penso leggerò questo libro ancora ma con più calma, è ovvio che non potrò trovare degli esempi o delle casistiche nella mia esperienza personale così come sono elencati nel libro, però magari un capitolo per volta mi permetterà di capirlo meglio e di metterlo in pratica.
Consiglio questo libro non solo a chi vuole aiutare gli altri, a chi vuole stare a fianco agli altri tramite la conversazione ma a tutti. In questa era dove si parla tanto, si ha sempre qualcosa da dire su tutto secondo me si sono perse sia la capacità di ascolto che la capacità di parlare.
Ho ricevuto una copia gratuita. Questa recensione contiene la mia opinione ed è pubblicata liberamente.

ENG
This book, in its 15 chapters, presents several levels to consider if the person reading wants to help someone through conversation.
As in the same author's previously read book ("See yourself with friendly eyes: How to Let Go of Guilt"), each chapter is quite short. It offers an introduction that contextualizes the topic of the chapter; one or more examples are cited in support; and finally, there is a summary.
While I found the first book very realistic and understood it easily, in this one I could not always imagine or fully understand what the chapter was referring to.
However, I liked that in the book, at two different points, Ilse focuses attention on the person who offers help—the one who listens, supports, or advises the other. I really appreciated that she made it explicit to pay attention to how much the person is able to help and to listen, and that this person is supported in turn.
I think I will read this book again, but more slowly. It is obvious that I will not be able to find examples or situations in my personal experience as they are listed in the book; however, maybe one chapter at a time will allow me to understand it better and put it into practice.
I recommend this book not only to those who want to help others and stand by others through conversation, but to everyone. In this era where there is a lot of talking and always something to say about everything, in my opinion, we have lost both listening and speaking skills.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

[Lorena · Rating 5 out of 5]

Psychotherapist and pastor Ilse Sand offers practical guidance on how to help others through conversation. Some of the techniques she shares can also be helpful for working through your own problems. I appreciated the author’s gentle, encouraging tone and specific examples.

In the first part of the book, the author offers various tools, such as asking good questions, showing empathy, and talking to an empty chair (it sounds weird but can be very effective). She provides specific guidance and examples of how to implement each tool. The second part of the book addresses potential pitfalls of trying to help, such as taking too much responsibility for someone else or helping for the wrong reasons.

I recommend this book for anyone interested in communicating more effectively and helping others. These are practical skills that everyone can benefit from.

I received a free review copy through BookSirens. I volunteered to provide an honest review.