Before the Lights Go Out! 11 Keys to Achieve Real Physical Intimacy

by Quiniece Sheppard

Physical +emotional + spiritual connection=intimacy. Intimacy will stop the cycle of failed relationships. Intimacy is the answer to a long-lasting, healthy and fulfilled relationship with God, yourself and others.

Genres: Inspirational

192 pages, Paperback

First published June 1, 2011

About the author

Quiniece Sheppard is the author of The Seven Deadly Sexual Sins, published in April 2009, co-author of an e-book anthology titled Christmas is More than a Myth: There is a Reason for the Season, published as a free e-book in December 2010, author of an e-book titled Walking the Path to Real Love: 12 Steps to Practicing Abstinence and Celibacy, published as a free e-book in January 2011. Ms. Sheppards second book titled Before the Lights Go Out:11 keys to Achieve Real Physical Intimacy: will be published in March 2011. Currently, Ms. Sheppard is working on forming an online Christian book club for African American self publishers or independent authors. Ms. Sheppard is founder/CEO of I am the Chase Ministries, LLC: a single womens ministry whose mission is to promote abstinence and celibacy. Ms. Sheppard wants to help every woman define and understand her self-worth and value so she can live out her purpose and destiny. Ms. Sheppard has spoken at several womens conferences, a parent-teen retreat speaking on abstinence, held her own seminar in September 2011 and will be holding her first single womens conference in April 2011. Ms. Sheppard currently resides in Alexandria, VA but frequently travels as a motivational speaker to deliver messages of inspiration, transformation and enlightenment to make a lasting impact to audiences everywhere. Ms. Sheppard speaks at workshops, conferences, seminars, book clubs, churches, youth groups and more. For more information or to book Ms. Sheppard for your next event, visit Quiniece atwww.iamthechase.com or email:quiniece@yahoo.com"

Reviews

[OOSA · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Lights Are Finally On!

In Quiniece Sheppard’s “Before the Lights Go Out: 11 Keys to Achieve Real Physical Intimacy” she gives Christian advice about love and relationships to other women. Not only is she giving out Christian advice but she is backing up her advice with scriptures from the bible.

“Before the Lights Go Out” is very well written for its intended audience. Sheppard presented eleven keys to real physical intimacy and explains in details each and every key. She also poses questions at the end of each chapter that makes you question your own relationship, or makes you think of the type of man and relationship that you are suppose to have. The book goes deep and explains men and women’s role, how to have a real spiritual relationship, how to apply God’s word to your marriage and how to apply intimacy in all aspects of your relationship.

I would recommend “Before the Lights Go Out” to anyone that is looking for their ideal mate.

Reviewed by: KaTina

[angela · Rating 5 out of 5]

I can't say enough about the content of "Before the Lights Go Out"! At first glance I assumed that the contents would be the non-fiction that usually end up forcing myself to read from time to time. you know the kind that's read more out of obligation that for pleasure. Boy was I wrong!!!! Instead, I spent mornings, days, lunch breaks & after dinner time with my fiance' delving into every word of the content. The fact that the information is written with fluidity and with a tone that isn't the least bit preachy added its overall appeal. I was and am PLEASANTLY surprised. I'm an avid reader and when I say that I experienced a plethora of firsts with this book, this is what I mean...1) I was enthralled with the expectation of more from simple reading the preface. 2) Even though I received the book and began reading it in September, I took my time to absorb (body, soul & spirit) every dotted "I" and every crossed "t". 3) Once delving into chapter one, the content seemed to resonate with every fiber of my being as though me, Quiniece, the Holy Spirit & God were all destined to the meeting at this very time. 4) There were hilarious truths emphasized, like the three tests every woman should give her potential "man":
~credit check, blood test check & background check. Aren't these some of the very things us ladies joke about with our girlfriends, sisters and aunts? Yes they are! 5) I actually called up family & friends to encourage them to get this book. Even changed my face book profile picture to the book cover (now, ladies you know that doesn't happen every day! LOL) . Throughout the book, it seemed like Quiniece and I were old friends catching up on all that had taken place in our lives after we left high school. The difference, she and her family members were transparent when it came to intimacy, love, lust, trials and faith. This is the novel I sooooo needed before I got married some 18 years ago. Now that I've read, absorbed, discussed and reflected on the concepts and principles herein, I am the better. I encourage women and men of all ages, regardless of your status: married, divorced, engaged, single, dating, desiring a help meet or considering dating to read Before the Lights Go Out,...before you engage in any of those things. It truly gets to the crux of the matter. It'll make you want to read every book Miss Sheppard has written! Is there such a thing as a 6-star rating? This is what "Before the Lights Go Out" warrants. Miss Sheppard is truly walking in her Godly calling! Headed to purchase her other books.

[Dream 4 More Reviews · Rating 5 out of 5]

Quiniece Sheppard wrote a relatable, relational, and real well-needed book for an audience in relationships (3R’s). She gives great realistic standpoints in the book such as “If God hasn’t put the two of you together then your relationship is illegal, meaning it is not ordained by God nor is it in His will” (p. 4). She encourages couples to rekindle their broken, or sour relationships as well as singles to seek a godly mate, not settling for less (e.g. baby momma, sidekick, or even play wifey).

Dream Moment(s): I loved the “preface” where she not only alerts the readers in but lets us know to chill and get ready to dig in the goodies of the book. The introduction opens up with the worldwide topics: sex. We are to examine our relationships to see what type of bond we truly have with one significant other. Moreover, she has a heart and willingness to help failed relationships. She also enlightens the reader on true intimacy with 11 steps or principles. (Truly, I hope to get this author on one of my 3 Internet Talk Radio program(s) to speak on this book and issues more in depth).

The key viewpoints or quotes highlighted in borders (boxes) are worth reading and applying in your life. I starred many of mines in the book! I enjoyed the eleven principles but favorite ones were “preparation” and “production.”

Dream Disaster (Nightmare(s)): None.

Dream 4 More (Keep us Dreaming or Begging for more): Moreover, Ms. Sheppard keeps us dreaming for the best in our relationships and hope she continues to write what God imparts in her!

The three tests for a man on page 34 from a spiritual perspective: credit check; blood test check; and background check. This definitely was making a woman dream 4 more in a relationship, partner, and mate.

Dream 4 More Reviews received a copy from the author for a book review.

Dream4More Reviews,
Adrienna Turner
Wooed Me Dream!

[Vernita · Rating 5 out of 5]

Before The Lights Go Out is a book that I Highly recommend; especially to Singles. Quiniece Sheppard has not only given us what's required to achieve Real Physical Intimacy, but she has also shown us what God requires of us as His children. This book is one of my favorites and I've recommended it to many.
I can personally testify that not only is Quiniece Sheppard the author of this book, but she is walking the talk. Her life demonstrates what God has given her to share with us. God is using her greatly as an instrument in His ministry.
Before the Lights Go Out; definitely is not only educational but edifying to all that read it. If you aren't sure what a good and healthy relationship is, then PLEASE get this book. If you have doubts or uncertain if you are in a healthy reationship or not, then again PLEASE get this book. Quiniece keeps it real to the readers and she does it with Godly love and even a sense of humor. This is also a good read for married couples and even couples that may be engaged or consider being engaged. At the end of the book, is a challenge to committ to....brilliant is all I can say.
Buying the Journal along with the text book will help you see in writing what your strengths and/or weaknesses may be. It will help you clarify what God commands from us and what we should expect for ourselves and from others. You will be truly blessed. Great gift for the holidays or any day. Quiniece, Keep up the Godly work. God Bless You My Sister.

Your Sister In Christ,

Vernita L. Carter

[Charlotte Riley · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think the name of the book says it all-Before The Lights Go Out!! Quiniece Sheppard, the author of this book empowers the reader about the 11 Keys To Achieve Real Physical Intimacy. After reading this book you will not only know how to be intimate with God, but with your partner as well. Quiniece, being a single woman has really listened to the voice of God in order to bring out such a profound message through this book. Quiniece, explains that there's no way you can be intimate with a mate, unless you first be intimate with GOD, thru Prayer, Praise, Plan, Performance, Passion, Promises and much more. Once Quiniece explains ways of intimacy, she tells you how to apply it to your every day life. It's a learning process that only can be taught through God, which is the holy spirit. On page 142, there a section on marriages and it states, "Focusing on the good and healthy parts of the marriage will help you become better equipped to handle the issues and problems". That little statement allowed me to go past my little problems in my marriages and focus on the greater part. I would recommend this book to everyone, single, married, male or female, because there's always room in our lives for approvement, especially when we have a mate, and you want to make sure that the lights never go out. For the single people this book will teach how to be intimate before God joined you with your soul mate, so that you would bring more to the table.. More excitement, more explosing and more sparkles. GOOD JOB QUINIECE on a job well done!!!

[Dr Author O Wright, PhD, MinD, ThD, DD · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Before the Lights go Out! 11 Keys to Achieve Real Physical Intimacy” by Quiniece Sheppard is a spiritually rich and enlightening book containing faith-based keys to achieving real physical intimacy. In truth, Ms. Sheppard systematically and extensively takes her readers through a series of Christ’s approved keys in seeking and finding lasting love and romance. Indeed, this author carefully pours out her whole heart and soul in presenting biblically based romantic keys that will clearly demonstrate the effectual working of the Holy Spirit in the heart of the lover and the one being loved. It appeared also that each key, when properly followed, will lead you to your God-given soul mate, and then, a happy marriage. Therefore, I am convinced that these keys, when practiced, will build and maintain joy and satisfaction in marital relationships that are based in the will of God. This invaluable and precious book is highly recommended to all, and should be particularly read by all married couples who, above all, want the joy of their marriage to last and to be pleasing in the sight of God.

[Anne Marie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was asked by the author, Quiniece Sheppard, to read and review her ebook. This book is very different then the books I would normally read. I think it would be a great book for young people that are just starting to date (if they are mature enough to understand) and ones that are thinking about getting married. Quiniece does have section(s) for married people (which applies to me). I really enjoyed how she helps the reader to understand the type of mate you need in your life and if your mate isn't that way then you may need to look some where else because they won't change which is really true. I don't know if someone that was thinking about getting married read this book and thought differently about their future husband/wife but maybe it would help cut down on divorce. I have been married for 20 years (going on 21 years in May 2013) and I feel like young people just give up to easy now days and think oh well, there will always be someone else. We need to be like the older generation and be with one person for 50 years and be happy with the person God put us with.

This is a Christian book and has bible scripture throughout the book which I loved.

[Yolanda Marion · Rating 5 out of 5]

First let me just put it out there ~ Never have I read a book that told my business the way this book did.(finished reading this the second time this year in July 2012) I went so far as to purchase them for others who have not yet gotten married and are of the Mind of Christ when it comes to Christ. This book relates to those Already Married and Going to be Married soon. Ladies you want to know how to keep God's Gift under lock and key until you jump the broom??! Well this is it!! God's honest Truth. If you are not ready to hear the Truth about the Do's and Don't and you should not's then don't buy it...Serious & Mature Minded Christ Minds only. A++ And then some.

[Mztiffanydivine · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the first book that I have read by Quiniece Sheppard's. In"Before the Lights Go Out: 11 Keys to Achieve Real Physical Intimacy" she gives Christian advice about love and relationships to other women. It is a very well written and I believed that it is intended for an mature audience. It contains spiritually rich and faith-based keys to achieving real physical intimacy. What more can I say, it is an awesome read. It's very inspiring,enlighten and I would recommend the book to the young as well as seasoned individuals.

[Ruth Hill · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love the philosophy behind this book. The author speaks directly to Christian ladies, and her focus is often on single women (since that is where her heart lies). Most of what she says is Biblically sound, and she is not afraid to say what needs to be said in a very strong fashion.

I enjoy the fact that this book is organized well, and the message does not change no matter where you look within the chapters. She is not afraid to stress the importance of sexual purity. She does not care if she sounds like a prude or an anti-feminist. She will quote Scriptures to back up what she is saying, and she also points out the consequences of sin. I love the fact that she talks to men as well. All too often, we women are told what we must to do so our guys will love us better. Her stance is that men have responsibility, too.

I do have two minor criticisms. There are times that her vernacular becomes a little more difficult to read. I am not sure if the author realizes how she might come across, but I think that her word use sometimes seems more appropriate for public speaking than a book.

My other criticism is still minor but a little more troubling. Some of her theology is a little unusual. It bothered me to read some misinterpretations of Bible passages and apply them to areas where they were never intended. I know that not everyone has the same interpretation of Scriptures, and this is true even amongst theologians. But my problem is that passages that are not typically applied to certain situations. I realize it may be a small issue, but I prefer for Christian authors to check out various sources before stating something as fact. I know this may sound harsh, but I am one who believes in not being dogmatic when it comes to stating things Scripturally that may not be able to be proven 100 percent.

In spite of these criticisms, I would still say this is a refreshing read that can speak to anyone who desires sexual purity and/or a more fulfilling marriage. Being a single mother myself, it was nice to see that I was already doing so much right in this respect! I am glad I am not alone because I sometimes feel I am. Had I read this book before I got married so long ago (and tried to date more recently), I would probably be single to this date!

I was sent a copy of this book in exchange for my honest review. I was not financially compensated, and all opinions are 100 percent mine.

[Foresight Literary Lounge · Rating 3 out of 5]

BENEFICIAL ADVICE AND COUNSEL

Single Christians in today's society face many challenges. In a culture where inhibitions are easily set aside, it takes self-control to remain chaste and pure. There are certain qualities the unmarried should look for in a person before pursuing a relationship. Certain keys such as prayer, praise, performance and passion should be present in the lives of a prospective spouse. For God-fearing Christians, a husband should be the spiritual head of his family, leading them to Christ. The wife should submit to and support her husband as he follows Christ. When certain elements are in place, real physical intimacy will take place. What kind of mate are you looking for - a long term boyfriend/girlfriend or a dedicated spouse?

"Before the Lights Go Out! 11 Keys to Achieve Real Physical Intimacy" is a self-help, motivational guide for Christian singles and married couples. Modeled after Steve Harvey's "Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man," Quiniece Sheppard outlines 11 keys that lead to real physical intimacy from a Christian perspective. The author offers practical advice on many topics, including celibacy before marriage and how to keep a stable relationship between a husband and wife. Although the subject matter the author covers is diverse, it causes confusion at times. Her target audience is unclear as she talks to both singles and the married. Since Sheppard is a single woman who has never been married, I felt that she lacked credibility on the subject of matrimony. Perhaps she should have only addressed singles from her own unique perspective. The book could have also used a more thorough editing job to correct grammatical and formatting errors, as well as misspellings. Despite its imperfections, this guide still offers beneficial advice and counsel to its readers.

Shelita Adams, Reviewer

[Amandasunshine · Rating 5 out of 5]

I enjoyed reading"Before the Lights Go Out" Quiniece Sheppard put her foot into that book. As we would say in the south, it was on like a pot of neckbones, LOL. There were many great points that she made in the book concerning prayer, waiting for God to send you your mate, intimacy, self-esteem, and praise. But there was a statement Quiniece made about savings that really took root and penetrated my mind, rarely do we look at savings and think "I value my future" this is why I save. Yes, we save so we can pay off bills or have something to fall back on, but when you think of it as a value and how you see your future that takes savings to another level. Basically what you do with your money now determines how you want your future to look. If you waste your money and not put away for what's ahead,it can hinder future progress...--saving yourself for marriage also shows that you value yourself and future mate. Overall, her teachings spells out>>>come into a relationship/marriage a whole woman/man. I will end with one of my favorite statements in the book, "Saving shows that you're appreciative of what you have and that you value your future."

Great Work,
Amanda Sunshine Williams

[Monica Mathis-Stowe · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent read!