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Hostage at the Table: How Leaders Can Overcome Conflict, Influence Others, and Raise Performance

4.07  ·  Rating details ·  403 ratings  ·  34 reviews
George Kohlrieser--an international leadership professor, consultant, and veteran hostage negotiator--explains that it is only by openly facing conflict that we can truly progress through the most difficult business challenges. In this provocative book, he reveals how the proven techniques and psychological insights used in hostage negotiation can be applied successfully t ...more
ebook, 272 pages
Published January 6th 2011 by Jossey-Bass (first published January 1st 2006)
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Average rating 4.07  · 
Rating details
 ·  403 ratings  ·  34 reviews


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Andrey Silaev
Sep 17, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I think it is the best book on psychology and negotiating that I readed so far. Can recommend it anyone.
Niels
Feb 24, 2013 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Very good reminder to look at the positive in things - and not least making sure to bond with goals and people. I liked the secure base/bonding parts.
Dmitry K
Mar 22, 2018 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
(The English review is placed beneath Russian one)

Название книги обязательно поставит читателя в тупик где-то на середине книги (а может и раньше). Лично я воспринял книгу именно как по переговорам и первые страницы книги это как бы подтверждали. В реальности же книга имеет мало общего с работами типа «Переговоры без поражения. Гарвардский метод», «Сначала скажи «нет»» или «Переговоры без компромиссов». Это больше, чем просто переговоры (если так можно выразиться). Это книга о том, как не попа
...more
Brechtje Spoorenberg
Heel interessant, van de eerste tot de laatste bladzijde. Het laat je nadenken over hoe je jezelf verbindt aan doelen en mensen. En over hoe je dat beter kunt doen, persoonlijk en zakelijk. De voorbeelden die hij geeft laten zien hoe dat werkt in uiteenlopende, extreme situaties. Aanrader voor iedereen.
Alex Memus
Прикольная концепция про то, как стать заложником можно только в свой голове. Особенно понравилась глава про психологическую опору.
Не понравилось, что пару глав — поверхностная вода.

Цитаты
Мы можем оказаться в заложниках у самих себя или других людей в любое время и в любом месте. К счастью, большинству из нас при этом не угрожают оружием. Тем не менее мы становимся заложниками, когда не чувствуем в себе сил и соглашаемся стать беспомощными пленниками. Идет ли речь о пустяках вроде критики со сто
...more
Gala
Jul 06, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: non-fiction
Не завжаючи на назdву в дусі Карнегі, дуже гуманістична книга. В ній багато теорії та порад що до переговорів та лідерства і постійно повторювана думка: це все правює, тільки якщо ставитися до людей по-людськи (з повагою та розумінням) , власне, це й сподоалося мені в книзі найбільше.
Joe Brummer
Aug 29, 2013 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
One of the best books on leadership and conflict resolution I have ever read!!
Varun
Aug 10, 2019 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Anyone who would like to hone and develop his/her leadership skills, should read, and re-read this book. It is a great resource on human psychology and behavior, especially during conflicts. George Kohlrieser has elaborated on profound concepts in a beautiful and lucid manner. I believe this book has helped me understand myself and my own behavior in not only professional but also in personal domains. I am sure I am not alone in behaving in a particular way during a situation, and then later upo ...more
Robert Bogue
When you can look at the topic of conflict from the eyes of a hostage negotiator, you realize that it’s a unique opportunity. Few people have the role of hostage negotiator, and it seems like it’s a role that involves nerves of steel and powerful charisma. However, at the same time, it’s easy to think that the skills necessary for hostage negotiation aren’t skills that would be generally applicable to your day-to-day office environment. It’s rare for Suzi to hold a plastic utensil to the throat ...more
Jorge Reyes
May 15, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: favorites
George Kohlrieser es un sabio contemporaneo. Como tal, su experiencia y conocimiento práctico nos ayudan a entender procesos complejos de las relaciones humanas, con un lenguaje cercano y entendible que incluyen historias que complementan y aclaran los temas comentados.
George tiene un diálogo profundo con el lector abordando areas como la psicología, la tanatología, las ciencias de la familia, la educación, la afectividad, etc.
El formato que se utiliza para transmitir las ideas es pedagógico, e
...more
Eila
Mar 04, 2018 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Es uno de los libros que más tiempo me ha llevado leer... no porque sea muy largo sino porque es tan intenso, que tenía que ir dosificándolo para poder asimilarlo. George Kohlrieser se ha desempeñado como negociador de rehenes y nos enseña sus mejores técnicas para lograr nosotros mismos rescatarnos de situaciones en las que somos rehenes... no necesariamente físicos, sino de entornos, de relaciones, de emociones... y hasta de nosotros mismos. Es un libro que recomendaría a todos, porque tiene d ...more
Tim Gillen
Overall, good book, with clear instruction on the power that each individual has, not being a victim to those around them. I have heard George speak in person, and he is quite engaging. As the book wore on, it did hit a few dry spots.

Vladimir Mosin
May 24, 2020 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Хорошая книга про управление конфликтами и управляемые конфликты. Примерно первая половина книга про это, а вот вторая - перепечатка Чалдини и других известных работ по психологии.
Jamie Bowen
A fascinating read on how you can stop being a hostage to your feelings, emotions, history etc. An excellent leadership and psychology book.
Denis Scholokov
Nov 04, 2019 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
интересный взляд на конфликты
Elif Sarıhan
Aug 19, 2021 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
It is a life changing book. I would recommend it to everybody!
Jeff
Feb 26, 2020 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Some great sections and tactics on communications. Bit repetitive but solid read
Laura Walin
Mar 04, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: management
Täytyy myöntää, että lähtökohtaisesi hieman karsastan yhdysvaltalaisia johtamisoppaita, mutta tämä oli hyvä! Toki lähestymistapa on hyvin periamerikkalainen tarinoineen ja loputtomine uskoineen kehittymisen voimaan, mutta perusteesit ostan. Kirjassa käytiin läpi tunneälyn perimmäisiä taitoja niin oman itsen kuin vuorovaikutustilanteiden hallinnan näkökulmasta. Panttivankitilanteista tuttu kiinnittymisen konsepti toimii hyvänä lähtökohtana myös työelämän konflikti- ja neuvottelutilanteiden ratkai ...more
Megan
I first met George in 2012 at an alumni event put on by my business school in Boston. I found him to be an engaging and captivating speaker and lamented the fact that I had not had the privilege of having him as one of my professors during my MBA studies in Switzerland. Many people are taken aback by the title of this book (especially if they skirt the sub-title details), but, indeed, George has made a convincing and practical translation of his skills as a psychologist and a former hostage nego ...more
Lisa Wei
Oct 22, 2015 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
The author shared some solid insights on human behavior/psychology (I especially enjoyed the Mastering Emotions chapter) and interesting anecdotes peppered throughout but the blandness of his writing made it hard to read more than 20 pages at a time without my mind wandering elsewhere. The repetitive nature of his points also bothered me. I wouldn't recommend this entire book to anyone; all you need to read is the summary at the end of each chapter. ...more
vania
Feb 12, 2013 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
E' intitolato "La scienza della negoziazione", ma io di scientifico vi ho trovato ben poco.
Anzi. E' tutto estremamente empirico, basato com'è sull'esperienza personale dell'Autore.
Quello che è trasferibile nell'esperienza altrui, e quindi riproducibile, è solo un atteggiamento mentale di fondo, di natura assolutamente generale.
Ma è sufficiente per poter parlare di "scienza della negoziazione"?
Io non direi.
Peccato, anche perchè ha un prezzo ben più elevato della media degli e-book.
...more
Sean
Apr 14, 2016 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Wanted this book to be so much better - who wouldn't want to learn from a master negotiator of life and death situations? Sadly such a wealth of experience doesn't make you a good writer. Apart from the opening and closing, the meat of the book is yawning and uninspired, and probably would've made a much better longform article than being painfully stretched to 200+ pages. Skim the end of chapter summaries instead. ...more
Dorotea Brandin
Nov 16, 2013 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I loved this book! George Kohlrieser's life experience comes to nourish a highly insightful vision of communication. We don't have to wait to be taken hostage for real to speak and listen with sincerity! All of us have the capacity to touch each other's common humanity and go beyond the difficulty of our immediate circumstances.
...more
Shireen Khan
Sep 17, 2012 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
The author led a module for a group I was in and told some mind-flipping stories. I was impressed with his insights and track record. For the past five years, I've been carrying the book around meaning to read it! ...more
Peregrine 12
Suggested by a friend but not relevant to my situation. This is a book that might help you gain insight into your behaviors if you've never given it much thought before, but I didn't get past page 50. ...more
Brian Mikołajczyk
A pretty interesting book about the situational de-escalation process through the use of interpersonal bonds and the understanding of how emotions play a role in them. Kohlrieser is a former hostage negotiator and does an excellent job in spelling out the conflict resolution process.
Sharon
Sep 23, 2012 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
This book was assigned reading for one of my college courses, and I thought it contained a lot of useful information. It will probably be one of those books I will read again and again as a refresher.
Fabrizio Stucchi
Feb 06, 2021 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Not the book I was expecting but still a very good one. It’s more about motivation and negotiating with ourselves than other and most of the content comes from other studies but it’s well organized and easy to follow.
Pieter​
May 25, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
New insights from hostage negatiator And psychologist
Daniel Escobosa
May 15, 2014 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
El mejor libro de negociación/managmente que he leido, muy recomendable si te interesan esos temas.
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