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500 Tips for Fat Girls

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Mary Lambert's debut collection of poetry. '500 tips for fat girls' is a moving and strikingly original exploration of body image, abuse, and queer love.

Cover art by Crystal Barbre
Printed by United Reprographics

41 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2013

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About the author

Mary Lambert

35 books126 followers
In 2012, Mary Lambert was working three restaurant jobs when her life changed. An aspiring singer-songwriter, cellist, spoken word artist, and newly graduated with a Bachelors of Music Composition from Cornish College of the Arts, she had begun to establish herself around Seattle, performing slam poetry and fusing a talk-singing style into her intimate performances. She received a phone call from a friend who was working with Macklemore and Ryan Lewis on their debut album, The Heist. Macklemore and Lewis were struggling to write a chorus for their new song, a marriage-equality anthem, called “Same Love”. Lambert had three hours to write the hook, and the result was the transcendent chorus to Macklemore & Ryan Lewis’ triple-platinum hit “Same Love,” which Lambert wrote from her vantage point of being both a Christian and a lesbian.

Writing and singing the hook led to two Grammy nominations for “Song Of The Year” and “Album Of The Year”, as well as the iconic performance alongside pop legend Madonna at the 2014 Grammys. Mary then signed with Capitol Records, where she released her debut album “Heart on My Sleeve” produced by Eric Rosse (Sara Bareilles, Tori Amos) and Benny Cassette (Kanye West). Her smash single, “Secrets” launched to No. 1 on the Billboard Dance charts, and was certified RIAA Gold in 2015. The New York Times called her debut album “refreshing and severely personal”.

Mary Lambert isn’t your typical pop artist. Inspired by confessional folk singers as well as spoken-word performers, she is a brutally candid writer who deals directly in her art with her past traumas. Lambert was raised in an abusive home, attempted suicide at 17, turned to drugs and alcohol before being diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and survived multiple sexual assaults throughout her childhood. With that list of horrors, you wouldn’t expect Mary to be disarmingly joyful, but she charms effortlessly, and the effect on her audience is bewitching. She describes her performances as “safe spaces where crying is encouraged; My entire prerogative is about connection, about being present, and facilitating true catharsis. Also, fart jokes.”

Mary Lambert’s latest EP, Bold. is her first release since leaving Capitol Records, and was fully funded through a Kickstarter campaign that raised $20,000 in 8 hours, and closed at $70,000 in a few short weeks. The response was a true testament to the passionate communities she represents. Lambert produced 3 of the 7 tracks herself, including a touching duet with her mom, Mary Kay Lambert. “Bold. is a queer pop EP about being unabashedly yourself. I think that we are in an era where embracing and loving your real, complex self is radical, and this collection of songs epitomizes that belief.” Bold. will be available worldwide on May 5th.

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5 stars
75 (59%)
4 stars
30 (23%)
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15 (11%)
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Displaying 1 - 15 of 15 reviews
Profile Image for H.M. Jones.
Author 31 books76 followers
February 11, 2014
Upsettingly vivid, raw and honest. Lambert does not pull back, does not aim to please, but seems to only want to grasp at understanding: herself, society, love, anger, memory, abuse, and meaning. Her collection is not perfect but it is perfect for me, a woman who has been fat, dejected, in love and taken advantage of. She is a woman, unabashedly strong, depressed, angry, hurt, joyful, in love, rejected and imperfect. And that's okay. I feel healed by knowing that imperfection, rejection and pain is shared.

As a self published work it is simple, concise and short, but it packs a huge punch and stays with the reader. Lambert's style speak to me, as a poet who does not think of form and grammar so much as the motion of words fitting together, words thrust side by side to create heartbreak and beauty.

I cannot rate it lower than excellent because excellent, to me, does not mean perfect grammar but a book that I will revisit and make old by turning the pages and dog-earring its corners. Wonderful collection.

My favorite poems (even though each one was a journey) were:

"greed of my mouth," "my weakness is a crooked wheel," "I know girls (body love)," "dear oprah," saturday night extravagance," and "little heartbeat"

Profile Image for Lissa.
1,319 reviews140 followers
July 24, 2016
I first heard of Mary Lambert, like many, because of the Macklemore song "Same Love." I then picked up her EP (which I totally fell in love with from the first second) and her book, "500 Tips for Fat Girls," which is a collection of her poetry.

I don't reread a lot of books; my TBR pile is far too big to reread many of them. But I can see myself coming back to this collection of poetry over and over again. Mary has obviously suffered through a lot in her short life, and the words in this book show that, sometimes painfully so. Sometimes, it felt like she was writing about my life, really. I'm a (former) cutter, and let me tell you, the first time I heard her poem "I Know Girls (Bodylove)," I cried. I can only imagine how it would be to hear a mainstream radio station playing this song (I still haven't even heard Macklemore's "Same Love" on a radio station yet).

This part from "I Know Girls (Bodylove)" always, always gets me:

"fathers and uncles are not claiming your knife anymore
are not your razor, no
put the sharpness back, lay your hands
flat and feel the surface of scarred skin
I once touched a tree with charred limbs
the stump was still breathing
but the tops were just ashy remains
I wonder what it's like to come back from that.
sometimes I feel forest fires erupting from my wrists
and the smoke signals sent out are the most beautiful things I've ever seen
saying please, your body is home."

I've been meaning to get a tattoo on my upper arm to cover up my numerous self-harm scars, and now I know exactly what it's going to be - that tree. Because I am a goddamn tree stump with leaves sprouting out, reborn.

So, yeah, that's my favorite poem, but each one of the poems here is a gem. Mary puts things into words and turns a phrase like I've rarely seen. It's no wonder that she's won several awards for her poetry. Kudos to her, and I hope to read many more things from her in the future.
Profile Image for Cait.
128 reviews6 followers
December 15, 2013
One of the most beautifully raw collections of modern poetry I've ever read. Mary lambert is my favorite artist of all time, and this book makes me feel so incredibly inspired.
Profile Image for Jaachim.
49 reviews24 followers
August 12, 2015
Holy fucking shit.

This book is so triggery but so so good.

I'd recommend it to a friend with a caution that it is about mental illness and incest and rape and body issues and homosexuality.
Profile Image for Travis.
9 reviews1 follower
July 2, 2017
Mary Lambert is one of my biggest inspirations when it comes to her lyrical and poetic talent. She puts words together in such a beautiful way that I, myself, could only dream of doing. I enjoyed every bit of these poems. My only complaint is that this isn't really a book or collection, per se, but more of a pamphlet in length. It's a very, very short assemblage of poems. I did overall thoroughly enjoy them, though, and it's something I'll love to keep for a long time to pick up for inspiration whenever it's needed.

I also would like to add that this content can be very, very triggering to some. Make sure you are aware of this before diving into it!
Profile Image for Laura.
2,144 reviews76 followers
May 3, 2018
powerful. moving. A few of her poems brought me to tears, while others simply reverberated with me. so many of her poems speak to me on so many levels that I can't wait to see more from Mary Lambert.

May 3, 2018:

I still love Mary Lambert. Every time I read I KNOW GIRLS (BODYLOVE) I hear it in her voice from the EP. I cannot explain why, by i will fill a tub with iceberg lettuce is my favorite poem.

Content warnings: rape, sexual assault, incest, self harm, suicidal ideation, alcohol consumption, inebriation, drug use
Profile Image for Savannah Gingerich.
5 reviews1 follower
February 18, 2014
It was not bad. I must admit, I was surprised by the darkness of it. Based on the title, I expected more inspiration based poetry. However, it is beautifully raw.

Also, I was surprised how small it was. Honestly, it's more of a pamphlet than a book. I ordered it from her though and she included an autographed picture with a note. I thought that was rather sweet.

The book as a whole was not impressive.
Profile Image for Angie.
1 review3 followers
August 6, 2014
I read the whole book in one sitting before bed and re-read it for several nights after. It is simply so heart-wrenching, so raw, so very genuine that it was difficult to not feel deeply connected to its author. I adore this book.
Profile Image for Jess Moss.
84 reviews6 followers
August 19, 2014
I really connected to this poetry. Intense and disturbing, honest and real.
Profile Image for Erin.
44 reviews
June 7, 2017
I love you, Mary. Much darker than her music, but it's beautiful. Raw. Prepare to cry.
Profile Image for Lee Alford.
34 reviews
April 7, 2023
I’m not a fan of poetry, like at all. However, I enjoyed most of this. So props to it! Favorite part is the first one though.
Profile Image for Tiffany Prescott.
58 reviews
April 23, 2016
I was expecting so so much more, and I was sadly disappointed. My sister is a big Mary Lambert fan so I’ve heard her music and was honestly anticipating this to be funnier? More relatable? More polished?

At times it was raw and powerful, but the title barely matched the content. And while many of the topics Mary broached are important, this felt more like reading an unedited diary than published poetry collection. I’m sad to say I was disappointed.
Profile Image for Eli Claire.
602 reviews1 follower
February 11, 2014
Short and sweet and incredibly moving. I'm not much for poetry but I could relate to some of her experiences and that made it more understandable. I especially liked "you are a goddamn tree stump with leaves sprouting out: reborn."
Displaying 1 - 15 of 15 reviews

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