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Truckers: The First Book of the Nomes Truckers: The First Book of the Nomes by Terry Pratchett
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“The way to deal with an impossible task was to chop it down into a number of merely very difficult tasks, and break each one of them into a group of horribly hard tasks, and each of them into tricky jobs, and each of them...”
Terry Pratchett, Truckers
“There's some things we can't think because we don't know the words.”
Terry Pratchett, Truckers
“The important thing about being a leader is not being right or wrong but being certain. Of course it helps to be right as well, the Abbot conceeded.”
Terry Pratchett, Truckers
“The monk solved his immediate problem by giving a little whimper and fainting.”
Terry Pratchett, Truckers
“How many books are there?" said Masklin.
"Hundreds! Thousands!"
"Do you know what they're all about?"
Gurder looked at him blankly. "Do you know what you're saying?" he said.
"No. But I want to find out."
"They're about everything! You'd never believe it! They're full of words even I don't understand!"
"Can you find a book which tells you how to understand words you don't understand?" said Masklin.
Gurder hesitated. "It's an intriguing thought," he said.”
Terry Pratchett, Truckers
“ If you ask 10 nomes to push four will pull and two will say pardon”
Terry Pratchett, Truckers
tags: humour
“I will endeavor to clarify my statement," said the Thing. A few lights flashed.
"Jolly good," said Masklin.
"Big-fella Store him go Bang along plenty soon enough chop-chop?" said the Thing, hopefully.
The nomes watched one another's faces. There didn't seem to be any light dawning.
The Thing cleared it's throat again. "Do you know the meaning of the word 'destroyed'?" it said.
"Oh, yes," said Dorcas.
"That's what is going to happen to the Store. In twenty-one days.”
Terry Pratchett, Truckers
“I. Woe unto you, Ironmongri and Haberdasheri; woe unto you, Millineri and Del Icatessen; woe unto you, Young Fashions, and unto you, you the bandits of Corsetry. And even unto you, Stationeri.
II. For the Store is but a Place inside the Outside.
III. Woe unto you, for Arnold Bros (est. 1905) has opened the Last Sale. Everything Must Go.
IV. But they mocked him and said, You are an Outsider, You don't even Exist.

From The Book of Nome, Goods Inward v.I-IV”
Terry Pratchett, Truckers
“I think all we really want is to go home and be safe," said Masklin.
"Go home."
"That's right."
"And be safe."
Terry Pratchett, Truckers
“I’m really not certain about threatening people with antelopes ...”
Terry Pratchett, Truckers: The First Book of the Nomes
tags: humor