Linda Stevens

“When you don't hold your pipe with the proper poise, smoking is very hazardous for your image.”
― Bauvard, The Prince Of Plungers

“We need to revitalize the American spirit. People are always asking ‘What would the founding fathers do,’ but I have yet to witness a single séance.”
― Bauvard, Some Inspiration for the Overenthusiastic

“I bet there are a lot of women out there who want to sleep with a guy who reads. And being the head of the reading foundation, I’m very well endowed.”
― Bauvard, Some Inspiration for the Overenthusiastic

“Like a valet who commits grand theft auto not to go for a joy ride but to open a used car lot, so do we seize upon love not to revel in its ecstasies but to haggle over its blue-book value.”
― Bauvard, Some Inspiration for the Overenthusiastic