Leah

“Life would be a lot easier if conversations were rewindable and erasable, like videos. Or if you could instruct people to disregard what you just said, like in a courtroom.”
― Sophie Kinsella, Confessions of a Shopaholic

“We don't usually write up accidents involving rabbits.
- Joe Morelli ”
― Janet Evanovich, Hard Eight

“Okay. Now my skin is really prickling. I've read all the Harry Potter books, all five of them. I don't remember any half-blood prince.

"What's this?" Trying to sound casual, I point at the ad, "What's Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince?"

"That's the latest book," Garth the other trainee, says. "It came out ages ago."

I can't help gasping. "There's a sixth Harry Potter?"

"There's a seventh out soon!" Diana steps forward eagerly. "And guess what happens at the end of book six-"

"Shh!" exclaims Nicole, the other nurse. "Don't tell her!”
― Sophie Kinsella, Remember Me?

“Yesterday I had a woman ask me what kind of salad dressings we have. I told her we have sesame soy dressing, spicy lime vinaigrette, and blue cheese. She made a face and asked, 'Is that all?' 'Yes,' I told her, 'those are all of our dressings.' 'Don't you have any other dressings?' he says. I mean, what the hell? What does she think? That I'm holding out? I was tempted to say, "No, we actually have an entirely different assortment of dressings that I don't tell people about the first time they ask, because they don't deserve these great secret dressings. But now that you have proven your worth, I will show you to the VIP room, where the array of salad dressings will dazzle and delight you.”
― Caprice Crane, Stupid and Contagious