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David Walliams
“In Britain, a cup of tea is the answer to every problem.
Fallen off your bicycle? Nice cup of tea.
Your house has been destroyed by a meteorite? Nice cup of tea and a biscuit.
Your entire family has been eaten by a Tyrannosaurus Rex that has travelled through a space/time portal? Nice cup of tea and a piece of cake. Possibly a savoury option would be welcome here too, for example a Scotch egg or a sausage roll.”
David Walliams, Mr Stink

David Walliams
“Adults always ask kids how they are doing at school. The one subject kids absolutely hate talking about. You don't even want to talk about school when you are at school.”
David Walliams, Gangsta Granny

David Walliams
“No more watching that show Small England or whatever it's called where those two idiots dress up as 'laydees'. It's a bad influence.”
David Walliams, The Boy in the Dress

David Walliams
“But children nowadays don't believe in magic. They are forever watching TV and playing computer games. They never look to the skies any more.”
David Walliams, Demon Dentist

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