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Feeling Nostalgic? The archives > Yo Ho Ho this is not/What would a goodreads cruise be like?

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message 1: by Sally, la reina (new)

Sally (mrsnolte) | 17319 comments Mod

Pirates off the coast of Somalia have free reign over the waters. There is no government functioning in that country, thus there is no military patrol of the waters. I have this misty-eyed and dreamy Johnny Depp-esque vision of piracy, and the events of the past year in this region don't seem as scary as they should because of that.
It all became more real when it was a cruise ship that narrowly escaped the pirates. But what will it take to end this? Should it be brought to an end?

I'm not saying that US military presence is needed in yet another region of the world. Nor do I believe that "safety" is an attainable reality everywhere.
But I remain fascinated by the old-school bandit lifestyle of pirates.
Seriously, this is what they do for a living.

message 2: by RandomAnthony (new)

RandomAnthony | 14536 comments That pirate thing scares the shit out of me. These pirates aren't fucking around. I don't condone any piracy, of course, but I also wonder if for some of these people in East Africa how many other options they have to survive. I think you're right about the US military presence, though, and I'm not sure what can be done.

Slight sidebar...and I was just talking with a guy I know about this tonight...I am never going on a cruise. First off, I'd be bored as hell, second, people keep falling off the damn boats, and three, pirates may attack. I'm staying home.

Except if Kiera Knightly is involved. She can be my pirate anyday.

message 3: by Kevin (new)

Kevin  (ksprink) | 11469 comments the whole deal just seems so hokey to me. a handful of starving guys with a few weapons ride up in an inflatable boat, board enormous, technologically advanced ships laden with millions of dollars of cargo (in one case $100 million in oil), demand a ransom, get the ransom (sometimes weeks later) and then get back in their raft/boat and disappear? do they use a cloaking device?


how do they get away? why would a company send a ship now-a-days with a cargo worth multi-millions guarded only by a crew with a flare gun and forks through these waters? here is my solution:

"You know, I have one simple request. And that is to have sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their heads!"

message 4: by Meen (last edited Jan 16, 2009 07:06AM) (new)

message 5: by Meen (new)

Meen (meendee) | 1733 comments Just because that book is what I think of when I think about pirates now.

message 6: by Kevin (new)

Kevin  (ksprink) | 11469 comments thanks mindy - going online to see if my library has that book

message 7: by Meen (new)

Meen (meendee) | 1733 comments Re: the real modern day pirates, this whole thing has been intriguing to me. How we glorify the old pirates, it's part of the cultural myth of this country... But they were doing exactly the same things these guys are doing (though with a lot better equipment). So, yeah there's the whole race and class thing going on here... And the problem with these pirates is that Somalia is so totally economically devastated, there's not a whole lot else to do to make money.

message 8: by Kevin (new)

Kevin  (ksprink) | 11469 comments yeah these guys don't exactly look swashbuckling. at least put a cannon and a jolly roger flag on the rubber dingy for gosh sakes !

message 10: by RandomAnthony (new)

RandomAnthony | 14536 comments Wow. Sarah, that's awesome. An NKOTB cruise? The mind reels. Heh.

What if they did a goodreaders cruise? What would it be like?

message 11: by [deleted user] (new)

Nobody would be reading.

message 12: by [deleted user] (new)

Plus, from what I've learned, it would be hella slutty.

message 13: by RandomAnthony (new)

RandomAnthony | 14536 comments Damn. And I thought it would be all calm and sedate. What am I missing?

message 14: by Kevin (new)

Kevin  (ksprink) | 11469 comments so don't pack any books?

(cruise ships have L-A-M-E libraries btw)

message 15: by RandomAnthony (new)

RandomAnthony | 14536 comments Cruise ships have libraries? I really don't have any interest in going on a cruise...although a goodreads cruise sounds interesting, even without the sluttiness. Somebody tell Otis:)

message 16: by [deleted user] (new)

I think a goodreads cruise should include a new book on your pillow each day (title generated by careful analysis of your goodreads reviews).

There should be mandatory silent reading hour each day (just like in school)!

Calm and sedate? Even the Palahniuk crowd?

message 17: by RandomAnthony (new)

RandomAnthony | 14536 comments I think Sarah should read to us. But would that feel too much like work, Sarah?

Hm. Maybe there could be theme rooms/nights, where the Palahniuk people could meet...and maybe the, I don't know, Jane Austen people could go somewhere else...

message 18: by [deleted user] (new)

message 19: by RandomAnthony (new)

RandomAnthony | 14536 comments Heh. I love that essay...part of the reason I don't want to go on a cruise...

message 20: by [deleted user] (new)

There could be a Never-Ending Pub Quiz!

message 21: by Meen (new)

Meen (meendee) | 1733 comments I would go on an Olympia cruise, just to be around that many woman bodies all in one place!

I really don't like being on the water, especially not where you can't see land, but I think I would enjoy an Alaska cruise. And maybe the Mediterranean.

message 22: by [deleted user] (new)

My friends are always bashing cruises and I definitely see why. My parents love them and you can't believe the dorky photos and anecdotes.

However. I'm just easy-going enough that I probably could enjoy the hell out of a cruise. I love the ocean, water, swimming, the sun, drinks, food, dancing, etc.

Even if you blocked everything else out, you could still read on the deck while occasionally swimming and/or ordering from the Cantina. I could live with that.

message 23: by Kevin (new)

Kevin  (ksprink) | 11469 comments i have been on two cruises and loved them. i didn't think i would because most of my vacations and travels are of the adventure variety but it was great. i took a bunch of books and told me family to leave me alone and let me do what i wanted. they were way cool with that so while they did their thing i sat in a beach chair and read books. i slept when tired, ate when hungry and did as little or as much as i wanted. i never wanted to leave the boat. i read jimmy buffet books the last time. perfect.

and yes, they have libraries but they are lame. a nice try but mostly just best seller stuff.

i would def sign up for a goodreads cruise

message 24: by Gus (new)

Gus Sanchez (gussanchez) I'm fine with a cruise, as long as no one decides they're going to murder me and toss me overboard.

Cruises are scary things...

message 25: by Kirk (new)

Kirk | 154 comments With Philip Roth as Captain Stubing.

message 26: by Meen (new)

Meen (meendee) | 1733 comments Ooh, a murder mystery thing would be fun. I don't think I'd want to be stuck on a ship for it, though. Maybe just in an old hotel.

message 27: by Félix (new)

Félix (habitseven) I've found cruises to be fun and relaxing.

Usually, though, my conscience starts bothering me when I think of the long hours the staff work, and the length of time they are away from home every year. Their on board living conditions are not exactly wonderful, either. For most of them, it's the only alternative to a life of abject poverty at home in The Fillipines or Haiti, or the like.

I guess I'm just conflicted about the whole set up.

message 28: by RandomAnthony (new)

RandomAnthony | 14536 comments With Philip Roth as Captain Stubing.

And Tucker Max as Issac...

message 29: by Kevin (new)

Kevin  (ksprink) | 11469 comments larry - the crew is partying like it's 1999 down on the bottom deck every night. gettin' the freak on. they signed on for the deal and they get to go to pretty nice locales and be in the sun quite a bit. i don't really feel bad for them. poor sucks could be slingin' refried beans at a Taco Bell in Moscow or Weifang City for less money and a lot less exposure to the world. i just tip em good and treat em right

message 30: by Sally, la reina (new)

Sally (mrsnolte) | 17319 comments Mod
I've never been thrilled with the idea of hanging out on a boat of any size for any length of time. I've never been on a cruise because I feel that there is so much more of the world waiting to be explored. In my perspective, going on a cruise is akin to going to Mexico and never leaving the resort, or going to Vegas, the most artificial of all places.

As for the cruising in open waters vs. seeing land idea, my mom has recently become a fan of going on these reduced rate cruises where you fly to a region and then board the cruise while they move the boat from one part of the world to another, you know, seasonally. She's now been on more than five of these cruises. I like the idea of cruising to get somewhere - crossing the Atlantic has a mystical appeal for me. I'd like to see just how big it really is.

message 31: by Kevin (new)

Kevin  (ksprink) | 11469 comments it's not that big really

message 32: by Sally, la reina (new)

Sally (mrsnolte) | 17319 comments Mod
oh? Just a pond?

message 33: by Dave (new)

Dave Russell My dad was a captain in the Navy. I used to love it when he would take me out on his ship, even the time there was a fire on board.

Last year I took a cruise to Mexico on Carnival cruise lines. I had more fun on the ship than in Mexico.

message 34: by Chloe (new)

Chloe (countessofblooms) | 347 comments I think the Somali pirates are getting big heads due to all the exposure they've been getting in the press. Now the Malacca Straits, that's been Pirate Hub #1 since the days of the Dutch.

I don't think that I would enjoy a cruise too much, but I certainly wouldn't ever turn one down if someone else were paying. My family lives over in the South Pacific and every few years or so they'll fly my wife and I out and we'll rent a sailboat and tool around the islands. It's definitely one of the most relaxing yet at the same time exhilarating things we've ever done and makes up more than a little for never being around them for holidays.

message 35: by Kevin (new)

Kevin  (ksprink) | 11469 comments i think their heads only look big due to the malnutrition as the rest of their bodies are shrunken from hunger

message 36: by Meen (new)

Meen (meendee) | 1733 comments One of the many things people in poverty lack is social status, so yeah, I imagine all this attention is feeling pretty good for them right now.

message 37: by Dave (new)

Dave Russell So when is Disneyland going to come out with a ride called Pirates of the Red Sea?

message 38: by Sally, la reina (new)

Sally (mrsnolte) | 17319 comments Mod

message 39: by Kevin (new)

Kevin  (ksprink) | 11469 comments yeah, it is a rubber dingy with an outboard and the smell of diesel fuel and body odor pumped in. you ride in a wave pool with massive swells and try to grab onto a rope ladder all the while having a 1971 AK47 in one arm. the background music is Deliverance played on the sitar

message 40: by Cyril (new)

Cyril | 493 comments I don't feel sorry for these guys. Sometimes they get what they deserve.

message 41: by RandomAnthony (new)

RandomAnthony | 14536 comments A certain moderator is going on a cruise soon. It's not me.

message 42: by Kevin (new)

Kevin  (ksprink) | 11469 comments :)

message 43: by Lobstergirl, el principe (new)

Lobstergirl | 23815 comments Mod
I've never been on a cruise and am not keen on the idea, especially now that there are so many stories of rogue waves, salmonella, backed up toilets, and electrical outages. Renting a cabin on a lake and going out in a canoe is more my taste.

message 44: by Kevin (new)

Kevin  (ksprink) | 11469 comments i do that too but a family vaca on a cruise ship is terrific and much needed by me. gonna sit in the sun and read for week. eat when i'm hungry, sleep when i'm tired and have some nice entertaining evenings at shows and such.

as for the cruise problems that have recently been publicized, there are thousands of cruises taken every year buy lots of ships and cruise lines and a couple a year have issues. i'll take my chances

message 45: by Lobstergirl, el principe (new)

Lobstergirl | 23815 comments Mod
You're right, the chances of bad stuff happening are small. Still, if I'm just going to sit in the sun and read and fall asleep I'd rather do it on some pristine nearly deserted beach.

message 46: by Félix (last edited Jan 01, 2011 01:27PM) (new)

Félix (habitseven) The part I like about a cruise is that it's as if you're staying in a traveling full service hotel.

message 47: by RandomAnthony (new)

RandomAnthony | 14536 comments I'm going to visualize an action movie in which Kevin rescues a group of dancers from a rogue wave and then joins them in the kick-line at the end of the revue.

Stacia (the 2010 club) (stacia_r) Cruises are awesome if you have kids. You can see them as much or as little as you like.

message 49: by Mary (new)

Mary (madamefifi) I never thought I was a "cruise person" until I actually took one, now I'm a loyal convert. We're going on our third one in March and I can't wait.

Speaking of bizarre cruise ship "mishaps", on our last cruise the aft deck was closed down most of the day during our last day at sea because they were waiting for a Coast Guard Medevac helicoptor to airlift a sick passenger to the nearest hospital which happened to be the military hospital at Guantanamo Bay. We watched the whole thing, it was incredible and made me feel very patriotic for some reason. Tricky to hover over a moving ship in windy conditions and conduct an airlift but they did it.

message 50: by RandomAnthony (new)

RandomAnthony | 14536 comments Heh. Can you imagine the poor sick guy?

"Sir, we know you're very sick. We're taking you straight to Guantanamo Bay."

"Um, no, actually, that's ok, I'm starting to feel better...false, uh, alarm, really, I think I'll just head to my cabin..."

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