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Book Discussion & Recommendation > Vaginal Fantasy Theatre 3000

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message 1: by Necrophidian (new)

Necrophidian | 74 comments I just got an idea.

It's really a terrible idea. I strongly suggest you just don't read anything beyond this point...

But if you insist on reading this whole post, please, whatever you do, don't respond to it! You'll only encourage me! The idea might even catch on, and that would be absolutely dreadful!

So, go on, go click on another thread now. There's no shame in it. I won't think any less of you. I won't be offended. It's really for my own good. Go ahead!


Still here?

Well, you can't say I didn't warn you. You're just a dirty enabler is what you are. Shame. Shame on you.

Anywho, sometimes my friends and I will obtain films that promise to be gawdawful bad. We then sit down and watch them, usually as a movie marathon. We do the whole MST3K treatment, relentlessly poking fun at the film, and we typically laugh ourselves sick in the process.

We did this with Twilight. It was hysterical. Tears were streaming down my face. I hit that point where you laugh so hard, you're not even making any noise anymore.

Occasionally, a movie will be so terrible that we're stunned into silence. With our mouths agape, we marvel at how real-live people actually spent money, time and effort to produce this train wreck unfolding before us.

Those are the truly special moments. They're strangely liberating.

I've also read some oh-so-horrendous books. Unlike with movies, I've never done this intentionally. But I had my reasons to plod on through, even after realizing the book was pants. In those situations, I endeavored to persevere and hated every minute of it.

However, it occurred to me just now that such a thing could actually be fun, if we all shared the misery and laughed about it together.

So, I guess what I'm looking for here - heaven help me - are "recommendations" on some of the most bottom-of-the-barrel VF dreck you've ever had the misfortune of coming across. I don't mean the "I didn't really like it" kinda thing. I'm talkin' the real "what is this, I don't even" stuff that made your eyeballs spin and had you thinking that maybe burning books wasn't such a bad idea after all.

This could actually be helpful in that, if we see certain titles cited a lot, some of us (read: F, V, K & B) would have an idea of what to avoid in the future.

This could also be decidedly unhelpful in that those of us who are not entirely right in the head could decide to do a little sub-bookclub and actually read some of these abominations together, share the pain, and laugh about it here.

Yes, that would be a completely irresponsible waste of time and money. Which is why it's such a bad idea. We should not do it.

But I do like to laugh, and I love to laugh with others. So, if you're still here, share with me your romance novel horror stories...

message 2: by Amy (new)

Amy | 58 comments I absolutely love horrible movies and other forms of entertainment.

I for one, support this.

message 3: by Seawood (new)

Seawood Oh, I am *in* for literary masochism: completing the book just to see how absolutely terrible it could get.

If we can't come up with enough books to start with it might be worth plundering Smart Bitches - they're pretty good at rating the terrible.

message 4: by Cory Day (new)

Cory Day (cors36) | 23 comments I'm on the Goodreads app so I can't link to it, but I read a free or close to it book when I first got my Kindle called 'The Brass Bed' (i think!) that I think fits this quite nicely.

message 5: by PointyEars42 (new)

PointyEars42 | 476 comments I think Siren Publishing's mission statement is to inspire bewildered cries of "What? No, seriously...what?! Ewww! Asshat!" with everything they publish. You're so offended and disgusted that you read another one just in case the last one was a rough draft that was accidentally marked as the final version. No such luck. I've had to create bookshelves with titles like "car wreck I have to look at" and "kiddie porn in disguise" for their books.

I second Caroline's suggestion of going to Just the FAQ response to whether you should send them books for review cracks me up.

message 6: by Amy (new)

Amy | 58 comments Cory (Bigler) '00-'05 wrote: "I'm on the Goodreads app so I can't link to it, but I read a free or close to it book when I first got my Kindle called 'The Brass Bed' (i think!) that I think fits this quite nicely."

So I just looked that book up. I don't think I've seen a book rated so low on good reads before.

The Brass Bed

message 7: by Necrophidian (new)

Necrophidian | 74 comments Amy wrote: "I don't think I've seen a book rated so low on good reads before."

Oh really now. Hmmm, that's a promising sign! Consider my interest piqued!


Oh, and look at that. 50% of the ratings are 1 or 2 stars.

And we certainly can't argue with the price!

Houston, we may have a winner!

I think I might subject myself to this one after I get through Kushiel's Dart (which I just started).

Three dubious cheers for Cory! \o/

Re: Wicked Hot. A lot of people seem to like that one. Is the larger Good Reads community especially forgiving? may indeed be way too accommodating for this horrible enterprise, and should probably be avoided at all costs...

*peruses site*


message 8: by Necrophidian (new)

Necrophidian | 74 comments Amy wrote: "I absolutely love horrible movies and other forms of entertainment."

Check out Journey to Promethea. It's sooo bad. ;)

message 9: by Angela (new)

Angela (happi_fishyahoocom) | 7 comments This sounds like a bundle of fun. :)

message 10: by Jess (new)

Jess McHenry (jess721) My husband makes fun of me for my obsession with terrible movies, so why not branch out into terrible books... I'm down!

message 11: by Sarah (new)

Sarah | 89 comments I haven't read it, but I have seen Cum For Bigfoot mentioned several times as a "WTF this is horribly entertaining." Also, Pregnesia just sounds terrible (my boyfriend didn't believe that was an actual book title until I showed him the reviews).

Totally up for this!! It sounds like so much fun!

message 12: by Amber Dawn (new)

Amber Dawn (ginger_bug) | 147 comments Love it. Now if I read the worst books ever I can tell my boyfriend it's "for science" or something... BTW related/unrelated but the MST3K guys are doing something called RiffTrax
basically they make an MP3 that you can play along with a movie that is them making fun of it like they did on their show... I watched the one for Battlefield Earth and it was pretty great. They cost usually 2 or 3 dollars. I am tempted to do the one for Twilight, because I couldn't get through that movie on its own, even though apparently you can see my parents' house from a distance on one of the scenes where they're lazing about in a meadow or something and I really wanted to catch that...

message 13: by Seawood (new)

Seawood So are we doing it? I'm nearly done with this month's book, looking for something short and horrible to laugh at ;-)

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