Indie Book Collective discussion
Banned words
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She was cute. Very cute. Very very cute. She was the Fort Knox of cute, if Fort Knox smelled like shit and spit up on its bib every five seconds.
or:
He gently slipped the knife between her ribs. Her eyes widened and together they were silent for a single moment, a moment in which the love in her eyes died even if the light of her life refused to.
A thick knife in her gut would never snuff that light. She was immortal. But he wanted her to feed off of his hate. He had fallen in love with a dark goddess, not the lovestruck cow in front of him, dribbling blood on the rug.
"Dammit, Grey," She said, as she tore the blade from her side and threw it on the floor. The wound sealed up as quickly as it was made. Her voice trembled, whether in pain or lust he wasn't sure. "Not you too..."
Just hate me already, he thought. Remember what you are.
Sometimes for contrast or a weak form of affirmation or negation, the passive voice and those "weasel words" can work well. There's a difference between "she slapped his face," "she lightly slapped his face," and "she playfully slapped his face." There's also a difference between "I hate you," and "I very much hate you, you know."
It's good advice to any writer to be aware of all of those words and how you use them. Those words are dangerous because we use them unconsciously, and they add a lot of needless bulk to your writing. I know after reading your blog post I am going to do another editing pass to catch those words. There are proper uses of even the worst words, though.

Also, the ubiquitous misuse of lead for led. (As much a peeve as an avoidance, I suppose.)
Since I write fiction, "because" is verboten, though it might slip into a line of dialogue if that's the way the character speaks.


Seeley, I'm not sure that I agree that adverbs are always a plus in thrillers, either. If I creep into a room, you can be pretty confident I did it silently, and no need to say so.

One of my recurring subtexts is Language, ítself.
I mix a lot of poetry into my prose. Sometimes I include words ín the poetry I would normally leave out of the prose.This double standard helps the poetry have a natural, conversational cadence.
Whatever works!


“Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very;' your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.”
― Mark Twain

One thing though. Some phrases have the same words, but the way they are placed makes all the difference eg.,
Take your clothes off vs. Take off your clothes. The second is far more erotic.

Jayne, we aren't necessarily talking about worrying about those words when first writing. This is edit country. Thus the joy of the search-and-destroy button.
What words to you try to avoid in your writing and why?