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message 1: by John (new)

John (noel_efturn) | 110 comments Frequently said and overheard are remarks such as "I don't give a damn," or "I don't give a shit," or even "I don't give a rat's ass" (rosy or otherwise). Such utterances simply beg the question:

What is it that you DO do with the damn, or shit, or rosy rat's ass that you do not give?

Do you have one special rat's ass that you do not give, or do you have several against the possibility that someday you may well actually have to give one or more?

Do you believe it is possible to regret the ass of the rat not given?

Despite the fact that this thread is contained in the general "fun stuff" topic, I expect some scholarly discussion on this very important social topic. Of course, all that is bullshit because I have a whole dresser drawer full of rats' asses, some rosy and some not, that I do not and will not give regarding the scholarship or lack thereof in this discussion.


message 2: by Melki (new)

Melki | 3515 comments Mod
I've never heard the term "rosy rat's ass".
Does that make them more valuable, and therefore more difficult to give than a regular rat's ass?

And shouldn't you keep your rat's asses in the freezer, rather than a dresser drawer?


message 3: by Mathew (new)

Mathew Smith | 686 comments Me? I don't give a flying F*&%, not just a regular F***, but a flying F(bomb)


message 4: by John (new)

John (noel_efturn) | 110 comments Bookworm wrote: "Me? I don't give a flying F*&%, not just a regular F***, but a flying F(bomb)"

I don't give those at a rolling donut.


message 5: by Hazel (new)

Hazel | 309 comments I couldn't give a monkeys chuff what other people do with their rats asses, or shits, or damns....


message 6: by John (new)

John (noel_efturn) | 110 comments Chris wrote: "Something I don't give, in addition to all those already mentioned, is a tinker's damn. These are in any case hard to come by, now that there are so few tinkers.

The kind of rat's ass I usually do..."


Hazel wrote: "I couldn't give a monkeys chuff what other people do with their rats asses, or shits, or damns...."

I haven't seen, much less been able to not give, a tinker's damn in a coon's age. Mostly this modern world is an improvement over the old, but sometimes old and comforting things just disappear. But then again, who gives a monkey's chuff?

Speaking of which, don't you find it odd that if you come across a slang term with which you are unfamiliar, particularly if it starts with the letter "c", that you are pretty safe to assume that it is a reference to female genitalia? Worked perfectly in this case anyway, though I wouldn't have given a tiny little rat's ass if it didn't; the fact that I don't have one not to give notwithstanding.

Last thing: Hazel, is it possible that you have a spare monkey's chuff that you might loan (certainly not give) me against the eventuality that I may have an occasion not to give one? And by the way, are they smelly? Is sealing it in plastic de rigueur?


message 7: by Hazel (new)

Hazel | 309 comments JOhn, have a freeze dried one, that way there's no issue with smell, and it lasts longer.


message 8: by John (new)

John (noel_efturn) | 110 comments Chris, I fear your re-write of GWTW would have run afoul of the Hays Office and would have came to its demise on the cutting room floor -- more's the pity.

Hazel, you are too kind by half. I am ever in your debt; at least to the value of one freeze-dried monkey's chuff. Perhaps we should make enquiry to Sotheby's to attempt to put a number to it, what?


message 9: by Rebecca (new)

Rebecca Douglass (rdouglass) | 2420 comments Mod
Clearly I need to improve my cursing vocabulary. "I don't give a hoot" is way too prosaic.

Of course, the original question dealt not with what phrases we use to express our complete and utter indifference, but with what we do with the item we are unwilling to give.

Thus: if the item in question is a rosy rat's ass, I save it to fling at annoying dogs when running in the park. While they battle over a fistful of rats' asses, I can make my getaway,

Of course, that does suggest I do, in fact, give a rat's ass about drooling beasts prepared to either bite chunks from my leg or trip me (and THEN bike chunks from me).

Perhaps it would be safer to stick with tinkers' damns, the scarcity of which is sufficient explanation for our refusal to give them to anyone.


message 10: by John (last edited Jun 12, 2012 09:18AM) (new)

John (noel_efturn) | 110 comments Rebecca wrote: "Clearly I need to improve my cursing vocabulary. "I don't give a hoot" is way too prosaic.

Of course, the original question dealt not with what phrases we use to express our complete and utter in..."


But is it really a Tinker's Damn? Is it possibly a Tinker's Dam? In such case we could take threads to the discussion off in several directions, such as 1) are they flood-control or hydroelectric? or 2) Ah Ha! Another sign that we are becoming a feminist dominated society: Why aren't Tinker's Sires acknowledged and validated? or even 3) What is the reason for the elevation of a Tinker's Damn (or Dam for that matter) over the Dam(n)'s of other equally important professions, such as Butcher, Baker, or Candlestick maker?

To continue would risk beating a dead horse; another thing I wouldn't give under most circumstances.


message 11: by John (last edited Jun 13, 2012 05:24PM) (new)

John (noel_efturn) | 110 comments Rebecca wrote: "Clearly I need to improve my cursing vocabulary. "I don't give a hoot" is way too prosaic.

Of course, the original question dealt not with what phrases we use to express our complete and utter in..."


I would say that 'prosaic' is apt, at least in the sense of commonplace since owls give them all the time, well all the nighttime anyway, and so there is a virtually endless supply not to give if one is so inclined.

Giving a hoot must NOT, under any circumstances, be confused with giving a pair of hooters -- hardly anyone does that (breast augmentations outnumber breast reductions by something like 50 to 1).


message 12: by John (new)

John (noel_efturn) | 110 comments Chris wrote: "John wrote: But is it really a Tinker's Damn? Is it possibly a Tinker's Dam?...What is the reason for the elevation of a Tinker's Damn (or Dam for that matter) over the Dam(n)'s of other equally im..."

Chris,

I find your analysis cogent, scholarly, and utterly unassailable; at least within the ludicrous milieu in which it was created.

On the other hand, I really don't give a flying f**k at a rolling donut.

John


message 13: by John (new)

John (noel_efturn) | 110 comments Chris wrote: "Well, ludicrous milieux is what I am all about. Ask anybody who knows me.

By the way, that would be a waste of a good donut."


Chris,

I have to respectfully disagree with you on this one. I believe it would be a waste of a good donut if I GAVE a flying f**k at one. But since I am not giving the flying f**k, I am not, in fact and indeed, wasting the donut. I ate it; it was glazed.

Warmest regards,
John


message 14: by John (new)

John (noel_efturn) | 110 comments Chris wrote: "I stand corrected (as the porn star with the bent willy said, after the operation).

It's a pity you didn't both give the flying f**k and then consume the donut, because this would have proved that..."



Porn star with a bent willy...very clever. Brings to mind the fellow from Kent.


message 15: by John (new)

John (noel_efturn) | 110 comments Chris wrote: "I believe the fellow from Kent got together with the girl from Devizes, and they lived happily, if somewhat kinkily, ever after."

I hear they would take their holidays in Nantucket. She being, at first, a disbeliever, and later an aficionado.


message 16: by Hazel (new)

Hazel | 309 comments [image error]


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