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Gentle Rogue (Malory-Anderson Family, #3)
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Book Advocacy > Book 26

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message 1: by Mark (last edited Jun 05, 2012 01:22PM) (new) - rated it 2 stars

Mark (mark_krebs) | 168 comments Mod
How about a bodice ripper!
I was recently introduced to "Shades of Grey" to my horror. It is So bad it defies description. Still worse ("What, even more worse?" Yes.) it's plagarism of some kind of comic book novel series,apparently. Literary scorn for the thing is as boundless as the guilty pleasure praise on the other side of the aisle. It gets only one or 5 stars.

What about the genre though? We've got to expand our scope, I say, else be labeled a bunch of stodgy intellectuals. No danger of that here: I'm suggesting a far better alternative, because it's Naughtical! (Don't worry, it's still badly written!) C'mon book club, summer's here, time to read some beach pulp. Who's with me?

message 2: by Gina (new) - rated it 1 star

Gina Sirois (gina_sirois) | 63 comments Mod

message 3: by Adam (new) - rated it 1 star

Adam | 115 comments Mod
Begrudgingly in.

message 4: by Gina (new) - rated it 1 star

Gina Sirois (gina_sirois) | 63 comments Mod
I purchased "Gentle Rogue" on my Nook last night for $3.99 (I now have that, Pride & Prejudice, and a pirated copy of "Fifty Shades of Grey" on the Nook, and I'm not sure what to say about that.)

I also read Chapter 1 before switching back to 1000 Autumns. It's a lot easier to read Nook formatted books on the device - I may not lament keeping it. Maybe I'll let it become a cesspool of books I'd never consider having on my shelves.

message 5: by Ben (new)

Ben (benroberts) | 85 comments Mod
I'd be willing to read it. I am unwilling to acquire it.

message 6: by Gina (new) - rated it 1 star

Gina Sirois (gina_sirois) | 63 comments Mod
I will go to Bookworm and see how many copies I can get. Then y'all can borrow them and pay me a dollar, and then I will return them to the bookworm when done and keep the credit. :)

Mark (mark_krebs) | 168 comments Mod
If I can score a copy with an unstained cover I'm NEVER giving it back.

message 8: by Gina (new) - rated it 1 star

Gina Sirois (gina_sirois) | 63 comments Mod
I have an extra copy now, and Mark and Adam both have a copy too.

Ben - let me know where you wanna meet to exchange. The 711 near your place is close enough to my work...

message 9: by Ben (new)

Ben (benroberts) | 85 comments Mod
That would work, but I work from 7:30 to 5:30, so it would need to be before or after. Also, I just moved, but it's only another block away. I'd be happy to arrange a different location and time if that works better.

message 10: by Gina (new) - rated it 1 star

Gina Sirois (gina_sirois) | 63 comments Mod
7am on Tuesday would work for me. I usually have breakfast early that day, and could pass by your place.

message 11: by Gina (new) - rated it 1 star

Gina Sirois (gina_sirois) | 63 comments Mod
update: on ch 9 now. ch 8 is so horrible it should be skipped all-together.

message 12: by Williwaw (new)

Williwaw | 193 comments Mod
Received following email from unknown sender:

"so we are having an ad hoc meeting of the book club disgusting book 27, I decided you need to attend a meeting in approx lee 1 month the book as you know is dental rogue."

It was so illiterate and nonsensical that I presumed it could not have originated from a member of this distinguished group; therefore, I marked it as "spam."

message 13: by Ben (new)

Ben (benroberts) | 85 comments Mod
It wasn't me, that's for sure.

message 14: by Mark (new) - rated it 2 stars

Mark (mark_krebs) | 168 comments Mod
Ok, I am about done. Halfway through, but about done.
I'd better tell a short story...

There I was, at the pool early, with an hour to kill reading, and Gentle Rogue tucked in my swim bag.
Deeply tucked.
I realized, it's because *these* people only know me casually, and not well enough to understand or forgive this vapid indiscretion. Little would they know, I'm only reading it for the anthropology of it all. (Yeah sure.)
I'll post again when I'm a little more sure what I actually DO think. Overall, I'm embarrassed: so very chick, superficial. Funny in spots though. The place where she... well, I'll leave that one as a surprise for you.

message 15: by Gina (new) - rated it 1 star

Gina Sirois (gina_sirois) | 63 comments Mod

"Dirk Eric Pitt is a renowned adventurer. He's described as tall, 6 ft 3 in (190.5 cm) with craggy looks, dark wavy hair, and possessing a rangy build. His most striking feature is his opaline green eyes, which can be both alluring or intimidating, as need be."

message 16: by Mark (last edited Jun 04, 2012 03:53PM) (new) - rated it 2 stars

Mark (mark_krebs) | 168 comments Mod
This book is Just Like The Thousand Autumns of Jacob deZoet!
Long lost lover across the sea? Check.
Frigates & such? Check.
New hottie eclipses the old? Check.
Troubles abound, but they can rely on each other? Check?
However neandertal, he's all alpha male, so she can't help herself? Not so much...

He's got stained glass windows an oversized tub, a linen 4-poster and shag carpeting in his boat? ...ok, that's just silly, but at least we know what it takes to get the girl.

message 17: by Mark (last edited Jun 03, 2012 04:01PM) (new) - rated it 2 stars

Mark (mark_krebs) | 168 comments Mod
No no no, no no.
The closest thing to a Boxer Ripper is Lt. Richard Sharpe. See wikipedia where "He is described as being six feet tall, having an angular, tanned face, long black hair and blue eyes. His most obvious physical characteristic is a deep scar on his right cheek, which pulls his right eye in such a way as to give his face a mocking expression when relaxed, but which disappears when he smiles, which is not too frequently."

Now THIS character is the boy version of what we've got here in Gentle Rouge (sic), only more shooting and less feelings. Oh they're there, but Dick keeps 'em to himself, 'cause he's a man's man, he is. I can sort of recommend Sharpe's Trafalgar and Sharpe's Tiger, though I put down my third, unread, and tossed those two, I fear. On quickly googling, I see Sean Bean (Boromir) played him in some TV series, or something...

message 18: by Mark (new) - rated it 2 stars

Mark (mark_krebs) | 168 comments Mod
Write your own alternate ending contest?

message 19: by Adam (new) - rated it 1 star

Adam | 115 comments Mod
Finished! 5 Stars for sure!

message 20: by Adam (new) - rated it 1 star

Adam | 115 comments Mod
The statistics for this book from Goodreads -- 4719 reviews:

5 stars: 2046 (43%)
4 stars: 1625 (34%)
3 stars: 875 (18%)
2 stars: 135 (2%)
1 stars: 35 (0%)

Really??? REALLY????? Five stars from all those people!!!???

message 21: by Williwaw (new)

Williwaw | 193 comments Mod
Wow, I think I picked up the wrong book! "Dental Rogue" is SO warped and exciting: it's about a dentist who anesthetizes unwitting victims in their sleep, and removes all their teeth. They are all forced to go on liquid diets, and together they plot their revenge, which involves a plan to drown the villain in a vat of slowly rising excrement. It's getting so suspenseful that I can barely put it down. No time to finish this message. Gotta keep reading. More later!

message 22: by Mark (last edited Jun 05, 2012 12:24AM) (new) - rated it 2 stars

Mark (mark_krebs) | 168 comments Mod
Ok done. Not quite finished but done. With just 50 pages to go, the tet-a-tete around the breakfast table is just too pregnant with innuendo and saucy remarks for me to pay attention. It's cute how the boys fight over anything. Ahh, men! Sigh! Blush, titter, moan giggle, and arch one eyebrow...

Excuse me I have to step outside and hit my thumb with a hammer.

It'll still get 2*s though, because it made me angry. I'd expected it would be so vapid I couldn't bother to finish, but instead the same irksome urge to throw it against the wall as with McCarthy, so there's got to be something there. What is it? The Formula.

Gina asked if we could distill it, so here goes: "against all judgment, she picks the alpha male." This bothered me in the scene with the brothers, it bothered me when she accepted him however angry she was (just turning to putty, eh?) because she didn't have a second thought. So the point is (and I meant to learn a lesson from this book so if there's another, do tell) a rapist/murderer who ignores her is what women want, so long as he's big and powerful. Dawkins, I feel sure, would agree.

Yeah, I can see that. How frustrating, and, one would think, insulting all round. It's worse for me of course, I've got the copy with the cover and it just makes me want to punch him.
"What Mark, threatened by a book cover? (titter, titter)"
"Err, only if it's working on you!"
See how powerful this cycle of chemistry is? It's like we're siamese fighting fish without volition.

Anyway, it does get very tedious towards the end, so if you get tired (say at the breakfast table?) then you can read MY ending, which follows, and is much briefer!

See how the cycle goes round and round?

message 23: by Mark (last edited Jun 05, 2012 06:09AM) (new) - rated it 2 stars

Mark (mark_krebs) | 168 comments Mod
Genteel Rouge: an alternate ending.

In the heat of June, Georgiana thought to take a dip, and perhaps after to sip some peach tea by the Thames, which was a lovely burbling stream here in the country estates where George’s virile husband prowled. On her way down to the river, wearing a scandalous swimming petticoat tied just below the throat and knee (both her calves were brazenly bared), she saw Reggie laying on a rock.

it was difficult to understand: had she been slain? Her back was arched over the broad low curve of Connecticut marble, burnished by highwater floods all these years, her head was thrown back, exposing her throat, soles of her bare feet planted on the gritty stone, knees bent, legs akimbo.

For a swimming costume, for she had virtually none. All that remained of her modesty was a brief panty of white laquered leather and a narrow strip of finely linked silver chainmail sprung across her nurturing mounds, sufficing to cover them above, but not below where cream swellings, fingerprinted with mud strained to make good their escape.

Georgiana’s cheer of greeting turned to a cry of succor: “Is she dead?” she raved at her brothers, each of them standing awkwardly near poor Regan, looking not at her charms, but not quite away, either.

Reaching her friend, she saw the dialated pupils rolled far back, faint shallow heaves of her delicate chest, rose pink of a nipple nudging aside two faithless links of mail. The woman was obviously in shock. Before Georgiana could breath the sweet breath of life into Regan’s parted lips she smelled salt, sea foam, flying fish and kelp and fresh sanded English oak, turpentine and rat piss, doubloons of old gold, brie and brandy and something more.... Him!

He rose from the river like John Bull, every inch the Englishman, his haughty nose sneering it’s unconcern. Reggie, she did not notice, flared her nostrils in time with his heavy breathing. How they could both smell him when he was Way Over There mystified Georgie, at first.

Water sheeted off his brick abs and his brick pecs as he easily backhanded her darling but hopelessly overmatched brother Wimble into the creek with a bricklike fist that exploded slowly across her brother’s face with jolly a snap-crackle and pop of shattering teeth. Wimble fell, silent and face down in the muck, his neck probably broken. Still, Georgie could not scream or even care too much because he was here at last. Yes, HE was here and she felt that familiar slippery twinge, and also now a wave of jealous anger towards Reggie, who, she began to suspect, didn’t get that opalescent smear on her eyebrow from ice cream.

Georgia’s remaining three brothers were yelling brave epithets, but James was having none of it. Though naked, clean, smelling like all that other stuff except not the rat piss, and sparkling in the turgid sunlight, beloved James chortled, unafraid of the three swords arrayed against him..

Those tiny American blades against a foot of stolid english lumber? You can’t be serious, gentlemen?

“Hurry James! Ohh...” that was Reggie, panting now.

Screaming, Georgie tore at the mesh shirt, but it only slithered up, exposing still more of the pillowy softness that had hoisted her lover’s boom.

“How COULD you!” James, and Reggie.

“Let’s kill him!” the boys, to each other...

“Har-har!” James taunted, his eyebrow arching to its sardonic peak. With a giant spring of his mighty yet narrow and beguiling buttocks, he executed a perfect backwards dive and began backstroking strongly towards his ship. His bricklike shoulders alternately parted the sea whilst a rooster tail of foam spumed around that delectable hook in his his cannon, plainly recently fired though half loaded again already.

“Noooooooo...!” cried little Georgia as she melted into a small puddle of linen and tears on the sand.

message 24: by Gina (new) - rated it 1 star

Gina Sirois (gina_sirois) | 63 comments Mod
I finished last night too. IT WAS REALLY AWFUL.

But still gets two stars - 1 because I read it to the end (and I think you have to start with 1) and 2 because the plot was Okay. I think a better book is hiding in the shell. Maybe Mark could write it.

Will review later.

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