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YouWrite > FEEDBACK on your writing

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message 1: by Amna (new)

Amna | 15 comments Mod
I noticed a lot of members joined because they wanted more feedback on their writing, so did i. So, you can all either link us to some of your writing that you have already wrote or something you have been thinking to write. Enjoy~

Here is a journal i have been wanting feedback on:

http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...


Kayla ~The Mirthful Messiah~ (Chucklevoodoos142) I REALLY want feedback on this story. Well...me and my brother. It's the one we're writing together and is in no way assosciated with Sonic, so no need to worry about it being a fanfic. XD!
Heres the link if anyone's interested: http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...


message 3: by Brooklyn (new)

Brooklyn (thebridge) I don't have time to read them now, but I will in the near future! (hopefully) :P just please let me know if there is swearing/other bad stuff, I'm kinda picky about what I read. Thnx! :P


Kayla ~The Mirthful Messiah~ (Chucklevoodoos142) Mine has absolutely no swearing what so ever or any "suggestive" material. It is apporpriate for all ages...well, there might be sme violence and possibly a death, but it's not gory or anything.


message 5: by Brooklyn (new)

Brooklyn (thebridge) Awesome! Will read...today?


message 6: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
LOL I don't know if I want people to read mine or not..... >_< I have issues with people I don't know all that well reading them......


message 7: by Amna (new)

Amna | 15 comments Mod
Mines doesn't have cursing, at least i don't think so..


message 8: by Brooklyn (new)

Brooklyn (thebridge) That sounds awesome!


message 9: by Brooklyn (new)

Brooklyn (thebridge) I'll try to read them soon...XD


message 10: by Alec (new)

Alec (downearth) i will read them right away!!
after a piece of pie!
lol no pie i finished it all.
XD


message 11: by Brooklyn (new)

Brooklyn (thebridge) GOODBYE PIE! WE WILL MISS YOU!!!!!! XD


Kayla ~The Mirthful Messiah~ (Chucklevoodoos142) NOOO!!!! THE PIE IS GONE!!! *Sobs* poor pie.


message 13: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
XD JERRICK ATE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! o.O AHHHH FLUFF.......RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN


message 14: by Alec (new)

Alec (downearth) do you mean to have a funeral, peoples???


message 15: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
lol that reminds me of one of Kayla's stories.
"What did I miss?"
"Your funeral...nothing big!"
XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XDX D XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XDXD XD XD D XD XD DXD XD XD X D XD XD XD XD XD XD XD X D XD XD DXD XD


message 16: by Alec (new)

Alec (downearth) thats funny! lolololololololololololol!!!!!!!!!!


message 17: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
XD


message 18: by Alec (new)

Alec (downearth) XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXD


message 19: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
:P OMG I WANT TO WATCH THE EPISODE OF PHINEAS AND FERB SOOOOOOOO BADLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GIANT PHINABELLA MOMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! XD


message 20: by Alec (new)

Alec (downearth) YOU IS SO RANDOM!!!!!


message 21: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
LOL I KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *JUMPS UP AND DOWN TO THE SONG SHE'S LISTENING TO* OOOOHHHH MICKEY MOUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D


message 22: by Alec (new)

Alec (downearth) ???


message 23: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE THIS SONG.......................and I'm not talking aboutthe Phineas and Ferb theme song (which happened to come on right as I typed that sentence....)


Kayla ~The Mirthful Messiah~ (Chucklevoodoos142) Lol. That's one of my favorite lines.


message 25: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
XD


message 26: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
OH YEAH AND THE GUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D Sonic is awesome :D


message 27: by Alec (new)

Alec (downearth) . You people confuzzle me...


message 28: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
go read her stories and it wont be confusing XD


message 29: by Alec (new)

Alec (downearth) Okay...


message 30: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
:P


message 31: by Alec (new)

Alec (downearth) You are so weird! :P


message 32: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
gladly ^^


message 33: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
BOOKLAND!!! BOOKLAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HIS FACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D HIS FACE WHEN THE DOCTOR STARTS TO SING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! XD I LOVE HIS FACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M GONNA GO WATCH THAT VIDEO JUST TO SEE HIS FACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 0.0 XD


Kayla ~The Mirthful Messiah~ (Chucklevoodoos142) XD!!!! OMS SONIC YOU ARE SUCH AN IDIOT!!!! WHY WOULD YOU GIVE ANA A GUN!!!???" Sonic, "Well, it seemed like a good idea at the time." "YOU GAVE HER A GUN!!!!" XD! He was so lucky you shooting Sage in the kneecap put me in a good mood.


message 35: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
XD :)


message 36: by Alec (new)

Alec (downearth) XDXDXD


message 37: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
:P


message 38: by Alec (new)

Alec (downearth) XDXDXD XDXDXD XDXDXD XDXDXD XDXDXD XDXDXD XDXDXD XDXDXD XDXDXD XDXDXD XDXDXD XDXDXD X D XDXDXD XD XD


message 40: by Alec (new)

Alec (downearth) :p:p:p


message 41: by Brooklyn (new)

Brooklyn (thebridge) :P:P:P?????!!!!!:P:P:PXD


Kayla ~The Mirthful Messiah~ (Chucklevoodoos142) Lol, are we having a smiley face contest? XD!


message 43: by Brooklyn (new)

Brooklyn (thebridge) XDXDXD idk, but my cheeks hurt from all this smiling! XDXD:P:P:P:P


Kayla ~The Mirthful Messiah~ (Chucklevoodoos142) OMS MINE TOO!!!!!! XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDDXDXD!!!!!!!!


message 45: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
XD


message 46: by Alec (new)

Alec (downearth) XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXD
My cheeks NEVER hurt from smiling! although that might be because i never smile...


message 47: by Brooklyn (new)

Brooklyn (thebridge) I'm sorry...I LOVE to smile!! :P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P!!!!!!!!


Kayla ~The Mirthful Messiah~ (Chucklevoodoos142) SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


message 49: by Anastacia *gaining love*, You know from TV (new)

Anastacia *gaining love* Asbury | 15008 comments Mod
WHY DON'T YOU EVER SMILE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


message 50: by Alec (new)

Alec (downearth) because thats just who i is...


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