Kids/Teens Book Club discussion

Members' Writing > Avery's writing comment please!

Comments Showing 1-5 of 5 (5 new)    post a comment »
dateDown arrow    newest »

message 1: by Avery (new)

Avery .

message 2: by Avery (new)

Avery Chapter1

This morning was a total disaster. I was supposed to be packing up my stuff and my seven year old sons stuff because my father kicked us out and we have absolutely no where to go, plus I had to bail my father out of jail because while he was drunk he peed on a police car and when the officer asked if I wanted to go out for dinner I said “no.” so he added an extra $500 which I had no money to pay off!
Stupid drunk fathers, you would think with grandchildren they would have some respect for themselves but according to my father he does and he says to me
“Your a stupid spoiled brat who shouldn’t even be in this world!”
My mother died four years ago, she ran away from my father to help me raise my son, Malcolm, after she was able to get away from my father, but she had health problems and got cancer, earlier when she was first diagnosed for lung cancer the doctor said she had around two months to live but she kept fighting for two years and then died.
What I never understood was why she left my real father and ran away from him with me and married this joke of a man, I mean yeah sure he took care of us but he abused my mother and me still. My mother was so kind and fragile but my father didn’t respect her at all, he woulds sleep with other women and he treated her like his personal maid plus if she said ‘no’ to anything he asked he would hit her. If I did anything wrong he would slash me across the face with a pair of scissors or a knife and when he found out I was going to have a child when I was sixteen he would hit me with what ever he could find even a week before my delivery he hit me. He never even did one little thing to help with Malcolm’s birth or childhood
So I do everything on my own with a small budget.

Malcolm’s father, Nathan, which I rarely speak about joined the army and a year ago two months before he would come back him and twelve other men were killed in a bombing.
I just wish that my mother was there to comfort me after that happened.

Malcolm was very mad , he would just sit in the guest room (Malcolm and my room at my fathers house) and would lock the door. When I told my father about Nathan’s death he was all happy like he didn’t care about him but I was expecting that from him.

message 3: by Avery (new)

Avery Chapter 2
So tonight I decided to leave my fathers house and stay at a motel in Ohio.
So a drive from Missouri to Ohio is from 9-10hours I calculated so I will leave early in the morning, carry Malcolm into the car, and throw the suitcase in the back and drive.
I packed all of our clothes in two big suitcases and some in Malcolm’s smaller suitcase, I packed some food for us and drinks. I’ve been saving money for this since my mother died and finally made the choice of leaving my father when Nathan died, so I saved all the money I could within a year and a half and put it towards leaving for good.
I have an old ’97 Ford F-150 that I found in my towns junkyard, I also got it for really cheap price which was really helpful.
I’m also bringing a bunch of blankets, coats, a pair of boots for each of us, a bunch of gloves, hats, and some new clothes for winter since its the end of November I say its better to be safe then sorry. I also got a cooler with sandwiches, crackers, water, some chips, pretzels, fruit, and some extra food I took from my fathers cabinets(I hope he doesn’t notice)
So tonight since my father is out at some club and usually doesn’t come back ‘till noon the next day I told Malcolm to go and sleep in the truck while I finished packing up everything in our room, when I was finished I went to the truck where Malcolm was sleeping got in and started driving away.
The drive was okay I mean there were somethings that could of been better but Im happy that we made it ok, we would stop at gas stations for gas and some food or snacks and water or milk and then we would be on our way.
When we got to the motel it was around ten in the morning so I didn’t feel to bad about waking anyone up too early. So I got a room for one cause Malcolm and I can share a bed, while we where bringing everything in this nice man from next door asked if he could help but I said ‘no’ because there was one more box left in the truck and that was the box with all of Nathan’s stuff in it and I didn’t want anyone except Malcolm or I touching that box.
When everything was set Malcolm and I took a long nap because Malcolm tried to stay up with me every minute of the ride so I wouldn’t feel tired but he ended up falling asleep most of the time but he deserved a nice nap.
When we woke up it was around five at night so I decided to make some dinner, because we still had some meat cheese and bread left we had sandwiches for a couple of days.
Then I went out to look out for a job because I thought that we could stay out here for a couple months but I didn’t want to send Malcolm to school because he has never been to school and I just didn’t think that now would be the best time for him to go to school anyway if he were to go to school.
So I ended up getting a job at Applebee’s during the day(and they said Malcolm could help out too!) and at a bar at night to earn extra money.
At the bar I met this really nice guy named Jake and he seemed really interesting, he left me his number, I kept it but I knew I would never call him.
Then the next night he came back at the same time and asked why I didn’t call and I said I was too busy getting ready for my day job and taking car of Malcolm and sleeping I just didnt have time and then he said.
“whats your name?”
“Trinity” I say in reply.
“Thats a name I haven’t heard of before.”
“I know, thats why my mother chose it for me.”
“So Trinity will you call me tomorrow then? Maybe during your lunch break or I can come buy if you want?”
“Whatever you want. But if you could just let me know before you leave so I know.”
“Okay.” He said in reply.
So about two hours later he stops buy me before he leaves and says he’ll wait for me to call him during my break.
When I went home (the motel, I made a deal with the manager that I would be able to live there if I could work every now and then) and Malcolm was still asleep where I had left him that night I went to work.
The next morning I got up, took a shower, brushed my teeth and got dressed. I got Malcolm’s clothes out for him and set them on the end of the bed for him for when he wakes up. I had some cereal and got my uniform ready work later.
When Malcolm got up he got dressed and I drove us both to Applebees.
When we got there it wasn’t that busy so I could wait while before I started working.
Malcolm helped with some of the dishes while I went out to take orders.
When it was time for my break Jake came in and sat down at one of my few tables ( I had a few tables only because I was new) I told Ali that I had him and she could take a break for a while, so when I got there I asked him what he wanted to order and he said,
“I’ll have the Chicken Fried Steak with a water, thank you.”
“That will be right up” I said now thinking he was probably like super drunk when he asked for my number and name, but I didn’t have to worry because he came with a friend so I didn’t have to worry about taking his keys away thankfully.
I brought him his water and then walked away, then came back with his chicken steak whatever,I didn’t really care because he was on his phone so I just set it down and walked away to my next table and forgot about him for the rest of the day.
Later Ali came up to me and asked why I took her shift.
“That was just someone I met but I don’t think they remembered me.”
“Oh, sorry honey you must be upset.” she said very sincerely
“Ya but it’s ok, don’t worry about me.” And that was the end of our conversation for the rest of the day.
It was time for Malcolm and I to leave it was about seven thirty and I brought home some dinner for Malcolm where I can just eat at the bar.
Malcolm went to bed around nine and thats when I left for work at the bar.
I got to the bar, it was so busy like there was a festival out back.

message 4: by Avery (new)

Avery Chapter 3
After I got to the bar Ali told me i could go back home because I took her shift earlier.
When I got back to the motel there was a man, tall and slender but muscular, with short but shaggy brown hair and was drenched with water.
He was banging on the owners door, yelling and screaming and shouting.I walked up to him slowly and cautiously, knowing he was unable to see me because his focus was on just getting the owner to open his door. I came up behind him, then moved over to his side where I knew he would be able to see me.
He stopped banging.
"Did I wake you up?" he asked kindly.
"Well if I don't sound to rude, what do you want?" he asked intentionally rudely.
"I was just wondering if you needed a room to stay in, but I guess not." I said then walked away quietly to my room.

When I came through the door Malcolm was up. Well he was watching T.V. in bed.
I walked over, put my stuff down then sat next to him. I could tell he was about to fall asleep so I stayed quiet as he shut the T.V. and went to sleep.
About 15 minutes after MAlcolm went to sleep, the same man banging on the owners door was at my door wondering if he could stay in my room for the night.

"I'm sorry if I lashed out on you earlier." he said so quietly I could barely hear him.
"It's okay, I''m quite used to it so it was no big deal." I said in a quick reply.
"O-Wa-wait, a lady like you should not be used to men lashing out on her."
"Do you need a place to stay or not?" I said trying to change the subject.
"Uh, Ya."
I motioned for him to come in and showed him to the couch. He looked at it with what seemed disgust.
"I can put sheets on the couch or I can give you blankets to sleep on the floor." I said giving him his limited choices.
"The couch, with sheets please."
"Sure." I said as I went to get blankets and sheets.

After the couch was set up as a 'bed', I told him that if he needed anything he could wake me up if he had any questions. Hoping he wouldn't have any questions in the middle of the night and would ask them all now he just said one thing.

"What's your name?"
"Trinity. Goodnight."

And I shut the light off and climbed into bed with Malcolm who was at the opposite side of the bed which was usually my side but I i didn't make a fuss because there was a strange man on my couch.

I woke up the next morning to find the strange man still there, sleeping.
Of course I thought lazy men sleeping at 10 a.m., But I didn't want to wake him up or disturb him so I let him be and got some cereal.

message 5: by Avery (new)

Avery Chapter 4
After I finished my cereal I went back and took a shower, after shampooing my hair I got out and dried myself, making the choice to change in the bathroom rather than take any chances that Sleeping beauty was awake and saw me.

After brushing my teeth and brushing my hair I went out to get Malcolm's breakfast ready.

I woke Malcolm up and put his cereal on the small circular table in the corner.

I walked infront of the couch to see Sleeping beauty still fast asleep, but he ended up on the floor within the twenty min it took me to shower, I started to laugh to myself a little, i realized. Then looked over to Malcolm who was about a quarter of the way done with his breakfast.

I went and set his clothes on the bed for him, for when he was done eating.

After Malcolm got dressed he went to the owner's door to see if he need anything he could do.

I trusted John, the owner, he was good with kids and never showed stress or anger when around them, so I knew that Malcolm would be okay.

Going through the week in my head it was Saturday, I had every Saturday and Monday off and every other Wednesday, so I could spend time with Malcolm when we both weren't at Applebee's.

I put on my sneakers and walked over to John's door, and saw Malcolm help organize some of the mail.

"There was some one bangin' on your door last night John." I said when I walked in.

"I wasn't here, I was at the bar, you know they had their anniversary celebration last night." he said a little distracted.

"No, Ali told me to go back home, it was too crowded for me so I just went home."

"That's okay, so who was at my door last night dumpling?"

"Uh...I'm not sure, but I offered him to sleep on the couch in my room when I walked by him banging on your door, but he ignored me. Then about five minutes later he came to my door asking if he could stay for the night, in fact he's probably still sleeping on the floor now, if you want to go over and see for yourself." I said out loud then again in my head to make sure it made sense.

"He's in your room?" John asked getting worried, then walked over to my door.

I went to ask him what was wrong but i got hushed by him. He went inside and saw the guy on the floor, squatted down and whistled right in his ear, waking him up and causing him to smack his face against the couch.

"Yeah, yeah I'm up." he mumbled

"Damnit Rob! You can't just keep coming here looking for a room from me" John yelled.

"I wasn't lookin' for a room, i was coming to appologize, then ask for a room." 'Rob' said as he rubbed his jaw.

"Oh...Uh...I'll get you some ice for" I said quickly as I went to get a small bag of ice.

"Here." I said quietly, handing him the ice.

"Thanks." He mumbled

"What was that Rob?" John asked, as his voice rised.

"Thank you for the ice." He said very loudly and clearly.
I winced in reaction to how loud his voice suddenly became.

"John, I'm gonna go get Malcolm now." I said as I walked towards his door.

"Okay, you both can come back, I just need to talk to Rob, here for a second." he said sounding very angry.

As I went to get Malcolm I figured that John and Rob must be related somehow, because of their strikingly similar features.

I waited for Malcolm to finish organizing the rest of the mail, then left with him back to our room, John and Rob were still there but both were on the couch sitting in silence.

"Do you mind if we have breakfast here?" John asked, much more calmer now then he was earlier.

"No, not at all, just let me get you guys some bowls right quick."
After setting the bowls on the table next to the milk and cereal already sitting on the table I went to close the door.

John and Rob went to eat, and Malcolm and I took their spots on the couch. John finished before Rob, and got up and asked if everything was working okay.
I nodded.

back to top