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Stories! > Poetry!!

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message 1: by [deleted user] (new)

For...well, poetry! (Wow, I'm so great at explanations...)


message 2: by Ivon (new)

Ivon Drew (agentid) well then ill explain

this section is for poetry and the poetry lovers, place it in here and you can all read and comment about it, you can then do a group session so one person thinks of a line then the next helps out and gives the next

that better halsey


message 3: by [deleted user] (new)

Ok, this poem I wrote a little while ago, and it's about depression.

Here's the link: http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...

I like to use a lot of metaphorical language so if there's ever anything in any of my poems that you don't understand please ask, I love questions! And I'm totally up for constructive criticism!


message 4: by Tara-Jayne (♥ I Read, I Love ♥) , Helps ivon, because he helps me! (new)

Tara-Jayne (♥ I Read, I Love ♥)  Bell (tjchocolate) | 32 comments Mod
im sure i have read this before!! and im sure i liked it!! my memory is so rubbish!!


message 5: by [deleted user] (new)

This is another poem of mine, it's pretty short so I'd love if you'd give it a quick read and maybe offer some constructive criticism!

Here's the link: http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...


message 6: by [deleted user] (new)

Ivon wrote: "well then ill explain

this section is for poetry and the poetry lovers, place it in here and you can all read and comment about it, you can then do a group session so one person thinks of a line t..."


Haha thanks, yeah.


message 7: by [deleted user] (new)

Tara-jayne wrote: "im sure i have read this before!! and im sure i liked it!! my memory is so rubbish!!"

Oh trust me mine is the same way!


message 8: by Ivon (new)

Ivon Drew (agentid) well where to begin, i know, first off the techniques and the rhyming go along perfectly making it so easy to get your point of view across and creating a deppressing effect as you were aiming for that feeling, that is then good as poetry then also uses a lot of different feelings, though the one thing i say you would need to work on is not the lengh but the emotion then, i do get the feeling of depression but when doing this you really need to make people sad


message 9: by Tara-Jayne (♥ I Read, I Love ♥) , Helps ivon, because he helps me! (new)

Tara-Jayne (♥ I Read, I Love ♥)  Bell (tjchocolate) | 32 comments Mod
lol!! wow!! i lie meetin people with bad memorys!! i dont feel left out!!


message 10: by [deleted user] (new)

And this is the last poem I'll post today, I promise! (Sorry to completely dominate the topic, it won't happen again! ...Ok so maybe it will but...you know. Bear with me here.)

http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...

And this poem is by far my personal favorite. It was inspired by the Paramore song Brick By Boring Brick.


message 11: by [deleted user] (new)

Ivon wrote: "well where to begin, i know, first off the techniques and the rhyming go along perfectly making it so easy to get your point of view across and creating a deppressing effect as you were aiming for ..."

Alright thanks! I wrote this one a bit quickly than I should have so I didn't give it as much thought as I should have so I really appreciate the advice!


message 12: by Ivon (new)

Ivon Drew (agentid) i had already read all three from the first hyperlink so the review came from that one, and dont worry about it, i want as many stories/poems as you can get on here, it helps and i can give some very good feedback sometimes


message 13: by Tara-Jayne (♥ I Read, I Love ♥) , Helps ivon, because he helps me! (new)

Tara-Jayne (♥ I Read, I Love ♥)  Bell (tjchocolate) | 32 comments Mod
yes you can!! hence the story i am working on!!!
(ivon) i know 3 ways which to improve, but ill only tell you 2!!
omg"" i cnt beleive you did that! lol


message 14: by Ivon (new)

Ivon Drew (agentid) you need to learn, poetry is a different topic all together, in a story you need to learn techniques on your own, you can get help and tips, but that does not truly help you become an auther


message 15: by Tara-Jayne (♥ I Read, I Love ♥) , Helps ivon, because he helps me! (new)

Tara-Jayne (♥ I Read, I Love ♥)  Bell (tjchocolate) | 32 comments Mod
thanks Ivon!! lol, what theme should i do after the one i am doing!


message 16: by Ivon (new)

Ivon Drew (agentid) right, i decided to do a bit of poetry, its pretty rubbish but i did it in ten minutes :P

all the poetry that im doing (probably wont be many)
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...


message 17: by Ivon (new)

Ivon Drew (agentid) its called broken wings by the way


message 18: by Tara-Jayne (♥ I Read, I Love ♥) , Helps ivon, because he helps me! (new)

Tara-Jayne (♥ I Read, I Love ♥)  Bell (tjchocolate) | 32 comments Mod
lol, ill look


[*GirLy_tricksy*]! (chhayaluvbooks) | 3 comments hey guys..myself chhaya....i'm posting a poem hope u all like it..


LIFE

Life is to live,
learn to forgive.
Life is full of ups and downs,
sometime happiness,sometimes frown.
Life is a struggle,
but not a muggle.
With so many events taking place,
with some dullness and some grace.
Life's statistics cannot be told,
no'one has the power to hold.
Sometimes scoldings,sometimes praise,
it's a life's single stage.
Sometimes unwanted things,
this is what the next stage brings.
Sometimes life's glorious,
sometimes mysterious.
Some incidents bring change,
devlopment of nature very strange.
Life bring challenges,
pretense of mere inches.
Sarcastic things happening,
it is a onset of new beginning.
For everyone life has different meaning,
for me its the melody to sing.


[*GirLy_tricksy*]! (chhayaluvbooks) | 3 comments this is my another poem


U FOR ME
Oh!My dearest possesion.
I love you so much,
I can feel you in every touch.
You are always mine,
For me you are my sunshine.
You are in my dream in night,
and in morning in every sight.
You are so special for me,
that in every sight i want you to see.
If you are with me i am always strong,
without you i feel i am wrong.
I am always there for you,
towards you i'll be true.
for me you are like glowing sun,
I'm sorry if anything wrong i've done.
for you i can climb a hill,
or forever stand still.
at last I love you the most,
hope our love ever grows.


by-chhaya


message 21: by Ivon (new)

Ivon Drew (agentid) well, where should i start, hmm, alright, it really does rhyme with the pattern of AABB and really does consist of slice of life standards, so it really is quite real, just keep it up, what i would say not to improve, but try different styles of rhymes, like half rhymes


[*GirLy_tricksy*]! (chhayaluvbooks) | 3 comments Ivon wrote: "well, where should i start, hmm, alright, it really does rhyme with the pattern of AABB and really does consist of slice of life standards, so it really is quite real, just keep it up, what i would..."

thnks and ya sure


message 23: by Ivon (new)

Ivon Drew (agentid) [spooky_light]! wrote: "Ivon wrote: "well, where should i start, hmm, alright, it really does rhyme with the pattern of AABB and really does consist of slice of life standards, so it really is quite real, just keep it up,..."

yeah, it usually keeps things different, but you could have something that has one half with a AABB rythym and then a CDCD kind of rythym, all im saying is to try and mix things up a little bit


message 24: by Andrea (new)

Andrea  (andreaorva) All my poems are in here: http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...

I don't have that many and I'm no pro, I just started writing poetry :)


message 25: by Tara-Jayne (♥ I Read, I Love ♥) , Helps ivon, because he helps me! (new)

Tara-Jayne (♥ I Read, I Love ♥)  Bell (tjchocolate) | 32 comments Mod
yeah! i randomly started!! lol


message 26: by Andrea (new)

Andrea  (andreaorva) I started cause there was a contest here on goodreads and I said, "why not give it a try" and i just loved it


message 27: by Tara-Jayne (♥ I Read, I Love ♥) , Helps ivon, because he helps me! (new)

Tara-Jayne (♥ I Read, I Love ♥)  Bell (tjchocolate) | 32 comments Mod
hehe!!
Ill post my poems in a sec


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