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message 1: by Aynge (new)

Aynge (ayngemac) | 1202 comments I recently read that Sean Connery was the first choice to play Gandalf in Lord of the Rings. He passed though, because he "didn't understand the script." He was offered 15% of the worldwide box office receipts, which would have eventually earned him FOUR HUNDRED MILLION DOLLARS.

Everyone has regrets, but do you have a major one?

message 2: by ms.petra (new)

ms.petra (mspetra) when I was in my early 20's, I worked at a small hotel near Red Rocks. A couple that was visiting offered me a job at their lodge in Alaska. I wish I would have done that.

message 3: by Michele (new)

Michele bookloverforever (lovebooks14) | 1970 comments My biggest regret is not finishing college. A degree might have made a huge difference in my life. I regret all the lost knowledge and college experiences I missed.

message 4: by Cynthia (new)

Cynthia Paschen | 7137 comments Shortly after the fall of communism in the Czech Republic, we looked into spending a couple of weeks there. We had a sitter lined up for the baby and a little cash from an advance from hubby's new job. We were daunted by the slim pickings for hotels. There was of course no Holiday Inn in Prague yet, and we chickened out. We should have just gone. I understand from our visit there a few years later that it was no big deal to just rent a room from a friendly local grandmother.

message 5: by Brittomart (new)

Brittomart Someone told me that I was valuable. I believed him. He's gone, and I feel worthless. I shouldn't have believed him.

message 6: by Félix (new)

Félix (habitseven) You are valuable. There. Now someone else is telling you and meaning it.

message 7: by Brittomart (new)

Brittomart Thanks, Larry.

message 8: by Phil (new)

Phil | 11694 comments Twenty-five years ago I had a chance to make out with the hottest girl in the dorm. She wanted me to kiss her, but I chickened out. Not really a major regret, since we did hook up later. I think she eventually got hooked on coke (not the drink), and I have no idea where she ended up. So my life since then is not a regret at all.

message 9: by Natalie (new)

Natalie (aquariusnat) About 7 years ago I was offered a temporary clerical position in healthcare and I turned it down , because I was nervous about paying bills . So I waited for a permanent position to open up (never happened) . Have been stuck in retail ever since . I seriously regret not giving it a chance in hopes of it changing into permanent . Lesson for everyone ! If you're offered any position in your favored industry , take it ! You never know what will happen !

message 10: by Aynge (new)

Aynge (ayngemac) | 1202 comments I took two years of Spanish in high school and I can't speak it. I can still read it but when it's spoken it's just too fast for my slow brain. I have friends who've gone to S. America for 2 weeks and come back fluent.

I should have taken 2 years of auto shop or a/c repair, and later a long vacation to Cancun.

message 11: by Michael (new)

Michael First, I agree with Larry up in message #6. One of my major regrets is not getting married when I had the chance to marry someone who was amazingly able to tolerate me.

message 12: by Sarah (new)

Sarah | 13815 comments I guess I wish I had gone to grad school immediately after college, but I don't really, since that would have meant I would never have given music a real go.

message 13: by Michele (new)

Michele bookloverforever (lovebooks14) | 1970 comments Britt, please notice that most of these regrets involve things we did not do and not things we did and then later regretted doing.

message 14: by Félix (new)

Félix (habitseven) Huh wah?

message 15: by Stina (new)

Stina (stinalee) | 750 comments I wish I had gone to NYU instead of Arizona... I was 17 and in love with palm trees when I made that decision. Poor, poor choice.

message 16: by Sarah (new)

Sarah | 13815 comments I think Michele is saying that most of us are acknowledging that the path we took was not a worse one, merely a different one. None of us have said "I regret having had kids" or "I regret having studied history."

message 17: by Félix (new)

Félix (habitseven) Either way it's a valid regret, though, right?

Lyzzibug ~Still Breathing~ (lyzzibug) | 708 comments I regret dropping out of high school my senior year...I later got my GED, but it would have been so easy to just finish.

Stacia (the 2010 club) (stacia_r) I did the same exact thing Elizabeth. Yeah, it would have been nice to do things the right way, but then again I've never done anything the right way.

message 20: by Sarah (new)

Sarah | 13815 comments Every time I see this thread Queen starts running through my head.

And bad mistakes
I've made a few
I've had my share of sand kicked in my face
but I've come through

Lyzzibug ~Still Breathing~ (lyzzibug) | 708 comments LOL of course there are things I wouldn't have done if I had so... It's these decisions that make life have fun twists and turns

message 22: by Brittomart (new)

Brittomart Michele wrote: "Britt, please notice that most of these regrets involve things we did not do and not things we did and then later regretted doing."

Yes, Michele, I'm glad I didn't have sex with him.

message 23: by Félix (new)

Félix (habitseven) Ah. Now I get it.

message 24: by Sally, la reina (new)

Sally (mrsnolte) | 17346 comments Mod
i wish I had just stayed in the education program at Portland State when I was there in 2001 and not moved home. Of course, Leah never would be if I had not come home, but it would be so much to better to have been teaching for the last 9 years than hair.

message 25: by RandomAnthony (new)

RandomAnthony | 14536 comments This is a hard question for me to answer because, as some of you implied above, the decisions I made/didn't make opened doors to opportunities I wouldn't have discovered. And some of what I didn't do at, say, twenty I'm glad I didn't do then because I wasn't ready.

message 26: by Félix (new)

Félix (habitseven) Learning from bad choices is one thing. Regretting choices, I find, is a waste of time and energy.

message 27: by Cosmic Sher (new)

Cosmic Sher (sherart) | 2234 comments Bravo Larry! I completely agree with that.
There are things I wish I had done, like actually settling on a major (culinary or archeology or writing/english or ...?) and finishing college. Or another wish is that I'd met my dh 10 years earlier.

But this last year I've learned that regrets just bring disharmony & make you stuck in the past and not able to easily move forward. Once you learn from the past and find value in that education, you can use it to move more easily into the future, that's what makes it all worth it. It helps you let go of negative aspects of yourself and find some semblance of peace and wisdom in the present.

Lyzzibug ~Still Breathing~ (lyzzibug) | 708 comments Cosmic Sher wrote: "Bravo Larry! I completely agree with that.
There are things I wish I had done, like actually settling on a major (culinary or archeology or writing/english or ...?) and finishing college. Or anothe..."

Nicely said! Something to meditate on ;)

message 29: by Sally, la reina (new)

Sally (mrsnolte) | 17346 comments Mod
Myles, I don't know if it is possible to come out any sooner than when the stars are aligned just right. I mean, aren't you kind of shedding old skin, undergoing a sort of metamorphosis if you will?

Then again, there are a lot of gay boys in high school nowadays, I don't remember anyone openly out in the early/mid 90s in my town. Times are different, must be nice, and it makes things a lot more fun.

message 30: by Phil (new)

Phil | 11694 comments The people I knew in HS who were openly gay were generally flamboyantly so. This was '77-'81. There were probably many more gay students, but they were tightly closeted.

message 31: by Sarah (new)

Sarah | 13815 comments I know what you mean, Myles.

message 32: by Dr. Detroit (new)

Dr. Detroit | 6031 comments I wish I could have convinced the old man to get me in at Ford as a test driver right out of high school. I'm glad I went to college and all, but I could've been retired by now.

message 33: by Jim (new)

Jim | 6485 comments Barb wrote: "I have a hard time regretting things I've done ... they've all shaped my life, and I like my life."

Me too, and I've made plenty of mistakes.

message 34: by Jammies (new)

Jammies My first apartment was pretty horrible, and later in my life, I thought I regretted not having a nicer place, then I realized the following:

If the landlord of the crappy apartment hadn't kept piling late fees on late fees, I wouldn't have had to take a second job.

If I hadn't had to take a second job, I wouldn't have been working the drive-through at McDonald's when the lady came through with the puppy she was taking back to the pound.

If I hadn't adopted that puppy, I'd have missed out on fifteen years of love and companionship and laughter and exasperation and fear and never known my beloved heartdog.

message 35: by Félix (new)

Félix (habitseven) That's just wonderful, Jammies.

message 36: by Jonathan (new)

Jonathan Lopez | 4728 comments That's one of the nicest stories I've heard in a long time, Jammies. You have a terrific attitude.

message 37: by Scout (new)

Scout (goodreadscomscout) | 3447 comments Jammies, your story made me think of something that's always fascinated me: We make hundreds of decisions every day, and each one determines the path the rest of our lives will take. Small decisions, such as whether to take the easy route or the scenic one; whether or not to let the person behind you who only has three items go ahead of you in the checkout; whether to hit the snooze alarm or not. Each decision puts us on a path, and we make these decisions without thinking of their outcomes. We think and think about the big decisions and do the best we can, but those little ones we don't really consider have just as much impact on our lives.

Lyzzibug ~Still Breathing~ (lyzzibug) | 708 comments That reminds me of that movie with Will Ferrel...Can't think of the name of it...

message 39: by Brittomart (new)

Brittomart Stranger than Fiction?

message 40: by Carol (new)

Carol | 1679 comments Aww, Jammies! That is a wonderful story.

Scout - that reminds me of Hummingbird's Daughter. She saw glass globes filled with all the universes based on each different decision.

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