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message 1: by Aviva (new)

Aviva (newtimelord) Prologue
I saw it coming. The blackness creeping into my vision. The ice coming up to meet me. I tried to fight it, I did.

I lost.

message 2: by Aviva (new)

Aviva (newtimelord) Chapter One - Waking to a New World ~Sera
A man sits in a chair. A woman sits on a couch with a child, another is in a doorway that leads to her room. Suddenly the man stands, his eyes wide, staring at the outside door. The older child, the one standing, is frightened and runs to her mother. The little one whimpers softly. The mother is alert, rigid, with an arm around each child. "Jaiju?" she whispers, so quietly that they can scarcely hear her. No one answers. Then an urgent whisper. "Lyda, take Sera and Lio. I will follow."
"Jaiju!" Lyda protests in the same tone. A pause. "Surrounded," she whispers, her eyes wide and frightened. She holds the children close.
The door Jaiju is staring at crashes open. It falls to the floor with a loud bang in the scared silence. Ugly men, beasts really, walk in. They are all muscle. Jaiju and Lyda have seen them before from the looks they wear on their faces. Pure hatred. No fear.
"What do you want?" Jaiju snarls. "You are not welcome here."
They do not speak, but one pulls out an object. He points it at Jaiju, who falls to the floor in anguish. On Lyda's face there is a mixture of fear and hatred. "Leave us," she says commandingly though her voice shakes with fear.
"Make me," smirked the leader. He walked up to Jaiju and lifted him from the floor. He shook him. Hard. "Just hand over the girl!" he said loudly. "And we won't harm you ever again."
Lyda shook with anger, no fear anymore. "You want us to just hand over our child?"
The beasts growl, furious. The leader drops Jaiju to the ground and walks over to Lyda and the children. He mutters something incoherent, but Sera, the young girl, gasps as though she understood. He smiled a wicked smile that seemed to be saying, That's right. Now come with me.
"No!" Sera shouts. "Never!" Her voice is full of anger and disbelief that he would even think that. She feels no fear, though she is a seven year old facing a massive beast. Everyone else in the room holds their breath as they waited for what girl and beast will do next. It comes from the girl.
She pointed to the open doorway. The beasts did not control themselves. They walk out the door. The leader is last. He swings his head around to face the girl that is more power than him. "You have not heard the end of this! We will get her in the end!"
The door slams back onto its hinges and the girl runs to her mother shaking with fear.
"It's all right, Sera," Lyda consoles her. "It's okay now. You're a very special girl.

The scene dissolves and another takes its place;
A twelve year old girl sits by a desk reading in a classroom. The teacher is nowhere to be seen, someplace outside of the room. A boy walks over to her. "Sera." The word sits in the air. It falls to the floor with a thud. All the other children in the room look up from their work.
"What are you reading? Anything good?" When the girl doesn't look up, he spits in the book. The girl, Sera, looks up and spits into his face. She continues reading after a muttered, "Idiot."
"Ewww!" the boy shouts. "Get it off me!"
Sera, bewildered, looks up. "What?" she asks. "It's just spit."
The boy is furious. He grabs her hand and smears a glob of 'spit' on it. "Just spit?" he asks before stomping back to his seat.
The scene turns to that afternoon. Sera is walking in the door of her home. She sets down her things, sheds her coat to the rack on the wall. She sits down in a chair. "Lyda?" she calls up the stairs. A pitter-patter of feet come down from the floor above. Lyda comes into view. "Ah, Sera," she says. "you're home."
Sera tells her mother about the boy and the spit. One sentence from her mother stands out. "You're very special, Sera."

The scene dissipates and one more comes.
Sera, now fifteen, walks home. Weird things had happened around her all day at school. It is a nice day, the sun showing and the temperature just right. She kicks a pebble. Instead of skidding across the grass, it flies upward like a bird into the clouds. Sera stares for a moment before continuing on her way. She hears a boom and stops in her tracks. She sees a small expolsion in the direction the pebble. She walks faster toward home.
The door is standing open when she reaches it. Inside, Sera can see the chairs and couch all where they were tha morning, the table in the same place. Everything seems normal. Then she finds the note.
Our dear Sera,
We have left our home for reasons cannot say in a letter,
but I can tell you we very much wanted to take you and your
brother. Take care of him, and watch out for enemies. Please
do not come after us, for we are in a place you could never find
us, no matter how you tried and with all you power.

Sera imagines her mother sighing and looking at her in that sad way of hers. She reads on.
I should have told you before, I wish I could have told you in
person what you need to know right now. You are unique, Sera
more than you think. If When we see you I will tell you
more: if someone else reads this I do not want them to know. We
have to go, I'm sorry.
Love your parents,
Lyda and Jaiju

Sera slumps into a chair clutching the letter in her hand. She sirveys the room. After reading the note it seems barren and empty. The beautiful day seems to taunt her. Lio walks into the house. He drops his pack by the door and looks around the room.
"Where's Lyda and Jaiju?" he asks, nervous. He is only nine.
"They've…left." Sera's voice seems empty, blank, void of feeling. She hands Lio the paper.
Lio looks up after reading the letter through twice. His green eyes are filled with a mixture of emotions. Sera sees determination dominating them. She agrees with him.
"We go find them," she says, both their thoughts. Even though the note said not to, she has a feeling inside her that she can, and will. The past words of Lyda that she has been told many times come to her. "You're more special than you realize, Sera."
I come to conciousness enough to think two thoughts: Where is my brother? And why am I so special?

message 3: by Steven (new)

Steven (tbones) | 7 comments Aviva wrote: "Chapter Two - Waking to a New World ~Utr
"Is she ever going to wake up?"
"Who is she, anyway?"
"What motivated you to bring her?"
"I think she's important."
"She had a cert..."

I haven't read all the way through but saved for reading later.
I would find a way to describe the characters but you can do it so many ways. You seem to like dialog and want a lot of interaction which is awesome. Maybe have someone say something that helps paint a picture of you characters. You could even create a narrator?

message 4: by Aviva (new)

Aviva (newtimelord) The narrator switches. First its Sera, then Utr (who will be explained later) and Radte. it will be one of the other 5 next

message 5: by Elizabeth (new)

Elizabeth Cool. You should send this in to an editor and publisher. This could get published. It seems a bit like Artemis Fowl, blended with Harry Potter and Grimm's Fairy Tales. And I should know. Read all three.

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