Water World

[Manuel]

I had heard about this film before I actually sat down to view it. Sometimes you run across an old carton of milk in your refrigerator, and even though you see that the expiration date has come and gone, you still take a whiff to see how bad it really is. That is what watching this movie meant to me.

Its 500 years since the polar ice caps have melted and flooded the earth. Humanity is reduced to a feudal system made up of survivors' who have built up communities on floating atolls made from the refuse and recycled parts saved from the 21st century.

What I supposed happened was that someone thought it would a good idea to make a Mad Max type movie, "but on water". The only thing more ridiculous would have been to put Mad Max on ice. In any case, this is a perfect example of someone putting too much money on a really bad idea.

Unlike Mad Max, where you actually like the brooding, stoic hero; Kevin Costner's hero character is unsympathetic and quickly becomes lost whenever Dennis Hopper appears on the screen as the villain leader of the ravaging "Smokers".

500 years after the flood, some people are convinced dry land never existed, but a young girl has appeared with a mysterious tattoo on her back, that might be a clue or map to dry land. Dennis Hopper is determined to get the girl, while Kevin Costner is equally determined to protect her. This is pretty much the premise of the entire film.

The end, when if finally arrives, seems anti climatic. I would have thought that if you have never seen land and you finally got to see and stand on it, there would have been a little more magic and reverence and possibly something spiritual and joyous? Our hero shows as much emotion as someone who is stepping off a plane in Fresno.

If you see this turkey, keep an eye open for Kevin Costner's gills. Yes, after only 500 years, evolution has produced a human being with gills. The gills look very much like female sex organs located behind his ears. Never mind dolphins, who were once land mammals and evolved a blow hole.

[Alex DeLarge]

Nice write-up Manuel! I've never felt the need to watch this film but have caught glimpses on TV. Sometimes movies are so bad they're fun to watch...but I couldn't take this one for more than a few minutes at a time.

[Shannon]

I loved this movie when I was 9. I'm afraid to watch it now. My husband also loves and agrees with your review, Manuel!

[Victoria]

I like bad male actors like Costner & Keanu Reeves; my taste whatever. So I liked Waterworld and its message that some people might adapt so well to a different Earth that the old beloved (to us) one would be strange and eery. I like your dolphin example, Manuel.