Critique needed for CR and PNR excerpts

[texxie-PRUFreads.blogspot.com]

Hi everyone! I am an aspiring author/writer who, at the moment, has two WIP's.

While neither is complete, I have a PNR and a CR. I am in need of an excerpt critique for either or both.

Thanks for you time.

[texxie-PRUFreads.blogspot.com]

*your

-Sorry! The GR app isn't as user friendly as I would like. lol