Aussie Readers discussion
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You have a great rating system, Sally!I like your approach for dealing with unhappy authors or publishers too.
I'm glad most authors I've encountered have been good people as well.
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A 96-year-old woman's note to her bank! Priceless!
The following is an actual letter that was sent to a bank by a 96 year-old woman. The bank manager thought it amusing enough to have it published in the New York Times.
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To whom it may concern,
I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month. By my calculations, three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his depositing the check and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honor it. I refer, of course, to the automatic monthly transfer of funds from my modest savings account, an arrangement which, I admit, has been in place for only thirty-one years.
You are to be commended for seizing that brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account $30 by way of penalty for the inconvenience caused to your bank.
My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused me to rethink my errant financial ways. I noticed that whereas I personally attend to your telephone calls and letters, when I try to contact you, I am confronted by the impersonal, overcharging, pre-recorded, faceless entity which your bank has recently become.
From now on.., I, like you, choose only to deal with a flesh-and-blood person.
My mortgage and loan repayments will therefore and hereafter no longer be automatic, but will arrive at your bank, by check, addressed personally and confidentially to an employee at your bank whom you must nominate.
Be aware that it is an offense under the Postal Act for any other person to open such an envelope.
Please find attached an Application Contact Status form which I require your chosen employee to complete.
I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in order that I know as much about him or her as your bank knows about me, there is no alternative.
Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be countersigned by a Notary Public, and the mandatory details of his/her financial situation (income, debts, assets and liabilities) must be accompanied by documented proof. In due course,
I will issue your employee with a PIN number which he/she must quote in dealings with me. I regret that it cannot be shorter than 28 digits but, again, I have modeled it on the number of button presses required of me to access my account balance on your phone bank service. As they say, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
Please allow me to level the playing field even further. When you call me, you will now have a menu of options on my new voice mail system to choose from.
Please press the buttons as follows:
Press 1: To make an appointment to see me.
Press 2: To query a missing payment.
Press 3: To transfer the call to my living room in case I am there.
Press 4: To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping.
Press 5: To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature.
Press 6: To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home.
Press 7: To leave a message on my computer, a password to access my computer is required. Password will be communicated to you at a later date to the Authorized Contact.
Press 8: To return to the main menu and to listen to options 1 through 7.
To make a general complaint or inquiry. The contact will then be put on hold, pending the attention of my automated answering service. While this may, on occasion, involve a lengthy wait, uplifting music will play for the duration of the call.
Regrettably, but again following your example, I must also levy an establishment fee of $50 to cover the setting up of this new arrangement. Please credit my account after each occasion.
Your Humble Client...
(Remember: This was written by a 96 year old woman!)
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Well, that certainly brought a smile to my face.😁
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Brenda wrote: "This is brilliant 🤣 A 96-year-old woman's note to her bank! Priceless!
The following is an actual letter that was sent to a bank by a 96 year-old woman. The bank manager thought it amusing enoug..."
I love this! Well done her!
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This is classic, Brenda! Love it. The PIN number had me laughing out loud ☺️
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Gave a number of us a laugh Brenda. I read it out to my dh and he cracked up too.
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The debut novel by QBD Books CEO, Nick Croydon, doesn't seem off to the best start:
The Turing ProtocolAnother book already due next year. Makes you wonder that maybe some people get book deals for other reasons besides writing.
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Brenda wrote: "Goodness Rowan, it sounds horrific from the few reviews there!! I hope you don't have it to read... so many one star reviews!! "Did AI write it" in one..."Yes, Brenda! It has been a while since I saw a novel bomb like this on release. I was sent a copy, though I will probably skip it due to these reviews! That AI comment makes you wonder how much AI could be making its way into books these days.
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Brenda wrote: "I definitely would skip it - not everyone could be wrong, surely! Yes, AI scares me; I don't like it at all!"I don't like it either, Brenda! It seems everywhere now unfortunately.
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On the up side, ChatGPT created me a lovely book cover for the Aussie Lovers of Crime/Mystery/Thriller/Suspense Winter Challenge!
Rowan wrote: "Brenda wrote: "Goodness Rowan, it sounds horrific from the few reviews there!! I hope you don't have it to read... so many one star reviews!! "Did AI write it" in one..."Yes, Brenda! It has been ..."
Interesting that the only five star review comes from someone who also works for QBD. Hmmmm ...
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Krystal wrote: "Rowan wrote: "Brenda wrote: "Goodness Rowan, it sounds horrific from the few reviews there!! I hope you don't have it to read... so many one star reviews!! "Did AI write it" in one..."Yes, Brenda..."
Yes, Krystal. The other five star review comes from someone at Affirm Press - his publisher.
Rowan wrote: "The debut novel by QBD Books CEO, Nick Croydon, doesn't seem off to the best start:The Turing ProtocolAnother book already due next yea..."
I happened to be in a local QBD store on the weekend as I had a gift voucher to spend. I had two different staff members from the store approach me and upsell this book. One I turned away politely and the other I had an earnest discussion with about the book, then letting her know that I was ultimately declining to purchase. To which she replied that the books I had decided to purchase were, in her opinion, much better written. I felt sorry for the staff - they have obviously been primed to upsell this one!
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Brenda wrote: "That's bad! They shouldn't be pressured like that!"Not to mention incredibly unethical!
Sorry you had that experience, Ange! It sounds awful.One of the "selling points" for the book said:
"...Nick is going to use every connection he's gained over his time in bookselling to make this a smash hit."
It would seem all the negative reviews for this book have now "disappeared" - along with the five-star one from an Affirm Press publicist.
Everything about this book is shady.
Rowan wrote: "Sorry you had that experience, Ange! It sounds awful.One of the "selling points" for the book said:
"...Nick is going to use every connection he's gained over his time in bookselling to make thi..."
You're right - all those 1-star reviews have gone. There were some beauties in there too! I guess if you have the power to do that all well and good, but nothing can stop "word of mouth" and that might be his downfall.
I hate it. Just another case of someone in power using that to control a narrative.
There were some thoughtful, well-written reviews among those removed.
Starting to feel like we can’t leave negative reviews these days without consequences.
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Just another case of someone in power using that to control a narrative.
There were some thoughtful, well-written reviews among those removed.
Starting to feel like we can’t leave n..."
All I can say Rowan, is don't read your copy!!!
Brenda wrote: "Rowan wrote: "I hate it. Just another case of someone in power using that to control a narrative.
There were some thoughtful, well-written reviews among those removed.
Starting to feel like we..."
Don’t worry, Brenda! I have already donated it 😂
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Rowan wrote: "I hate it. Just another case of someone in power using that to control a narrative.
There were some thoughtful, well-written reviews among those removed.
Starting to feel like we can’t leave n..."
That is just so wrong to remove well written negative reviews! Totally unethical!!
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Brenda wrote: "Lol!! He's obviously a new author and doesn't know the protocol!! If he keeps it up he's likely to lose any good benefits; readers don't like authors who interfere with the reviewing process!! Good..."Oh, I don't want to go anywhere near that book, Brenda! Lol I've never seen so many fake reviews - both negative and positive ones. Such a circus!
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I have finally changed my Amazon US account to Amazon AU and yes everything transferred over but now I can't leave any reviews because I don't meet the guidelines :( which I think is because I now haven't spent $50 doesn't seem to matter how much I have spent over the years while with Amazon US :(It might take me a while before I can post reviews.
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The press have now latched onto the debacle which is The Turing Protocol 🙈https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti...
https://qnews.com.au/outrage-as-novel...
Rowan wrote: "The press have now latched onto the debacle which is The Turing Protocol 🙈"Did you read at the bottom of the 'qnews' link where it reads:
"– Given there’s supposedly a sequel in the works (!), and that the book has been sold internationally, I imagine the Turing family, and UK historians, will have strong views."
A sequel?? Obviously this is not the end....
Angela wrote: "Rowan wrote: "The press have now latched onto the debacle which is The Turing Protocol 🙈"Did you read at the bottom of the 'qnews' link where it reads:
"– Given there’s supposedly a sequel in th..."
Yes, Ange! Part of the craziness is how the CEO landed a two-book deal - right out of the gates.
I'm intrigued whether that sequel will happen.
Rowan wrote: "Angela wrote: "Rowan wrote: "The press have now latched onto the debacle which is The Turing Protocol 🙈"Did you read at the bottom of the 'qnews' link where it reads:
"– Given there’s supposedly..."
Ah yes, astonishing that the CEO scored a two book deal...
Aussie Readers
Books mentioned in this topic
The Funeral Crashers (other topics)The Funeral Crashers (other topics)
The Turing Protocol (other topics)
The Turing Protocol (other topics)
The Salt Path (other topics)
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Authors mentioned in this topic
Joanna Nell (other topics)Joanna Nell (other topics)
Verity Bright (other topics)
Verity Bright (other topics)
Verity Bright (other topics)
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I have my own star rating system which is different to the Goodreads rating - my 2 star ratings are not the end of the world ratings either!
5★s – Excellent Stuff – a real page turner and hard to put down. I carved out extra reading time just so I could finish it. This book got carted into the bathroom with me, read over meals, read at work, and/or kept me up late at night. If this author has more work, I will certainly read it
4★s – Great - I really enjoyed reading it and it is a book I will be recommending to all my friends who like this genre
3★s – Above average - was very readable and I really liked it but was easily able to put it down and walk away for a while
2★s – Average - it was OK, but for one reason or another I found it a bit of struggle to stay focused and finish.
If an author/publisher spits at my rating I direct them to my Goodreads profile “About me” where I have it written - saying to click “more”.
Then I quietly blacklist the author/publisher - because they need me more than I need them.
I have some doozies of “Karen” authors in the past - but thankfully 99% of authors I have dealt with are just amazing people.