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The San Diego Zoo
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Sarah
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Mar 19, 2008 06:03PM

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Someone told me
It's all happening at the zoo.
I do believe it,
I do believe it's true.
It's a light and tumble journey
From the East Side to the park;
Just a fine and fancy ramble
To the zoo.
But you can take the crosstown bus
If it's raining or it's cold,
And the animals will love it
If you do.
Somethin' tells me
It's all happening at the zoo.
The monkeys stand for honesty,
Giraffes are insincere,
And the elephants are kindly but
They're dumb.
Orangutans are skeptical
Of changes in their cages,
And the zookeeper is very fond of rum.
Zebras are reactionaries,
Antelopes are missionaries,
Pigeons plot in secrecy,
And hamsters turn on frequently.
What a gas! You gotta come and see
At the zoo.
It's all happening at the zoo.
I do believe it,
I do believe it's true.
It's a light and tumble journey
From the East Side to the park;
Just a fine and fancy ramble
To the zoo.
But you can take the crosstown bus
If it's raining or it's cold,
And the animals will love it
If you do.
Somethin' tells me
It's all happening at the zoo.
The monkeys stand for honesty,
Giraffes are insincere,
And the elephants are kindly but
They're dumb.
Orangutans are skeptical
Of changes in their cages,
And the zookeeper is very fond of rum.
Zebras are reactionaries,
Antelopes are missionaries,
Pigeons plot in secrecy,
And hamsters turn on frequently.
What a gas! You gotta come and see
At the zoo.
Zoo Keeper's Wife
I can stay awake all night, if need be —
Cold as an eel, without eyelids.
Like a dead lake the dark envelops me,
Blueblack, a spectacular plum-fruit.
No airbubbles start from my heart. I am lungless
And ugly, my belly a silk stocking
Where the heads and tails of my sisters decompose.
Look, they are melting like coins in the powerful juices —
The spidery jaws, the spine-bones bared for a moment
Like the white lines on a blueprint.
Should I stir, I think this pink and purple plastic
Guts-bag would clack like a child’s rattle,
Old grievances jostling each other, so many loose teeth.
But what do you know about that
My fat pork, my marrowy sweetheart, face-to-the-wall?
Some things in this world are indigestible.
You wooed me with the wolf-headed fruit bats
Hanging from their scorched hooks in the moist
Fug of the Small Mammal House.
The armadillo dozed in his sandbin
Obscene and bald as a pig, the white mice
Multiplied to infinity like angels on a pinhead
Out of sheer boredom. Tangled in the sweat-wet sheets
I remembered the bloodied chicks and the quartered rabbits.
You checked the diet charts and took me to play
With the boa constrictor in the Fellows’ Garden.
I pretended I was the Tree of Knowledge.
I entered your bible, I boarded your ark
With the sacred baboon in his wig and wax ears
And the bear-furred, bird-eating spider
Clambering round its glass box like an eight-fingered hand.
I can’t get it out of my mind
How our courtship lit the tindery cages —
Your two-horned rhinoceros opened a mouth
Dirty as a bootsole and big as a hospital sink
For my cube of sugar: its bog breath
Gloved my arm to the elbow.
The snails blew kisses like black apples.
Nightly now I flog apes owls bears sheep
Over their iron stile. And still don’t sleep.
- Sylvia Plath
I can stay awake all night, if need be —
Cold as an eel, without eyelids.
Like a dead lake the dark envelops me,
Blueblack, a spectacular plum-fruit.
No airbubbles start from my heart. I am lungless
And ugly, my belly a silk stocking
Where the heads and tails of my sisters decompose.
Look, they are melting like coins in the powerful juices —
The spidery jaws, the spine-bones bared for a moment
Like the white lines on a blueprint.
Should I stir, I think this pink and purple plastic
Guts-bag would clack like a child’s rattle,
Old grievances jostling each other, so many loose teeth.
But what do you know about that
My fat pork, my marrowy sweetheart, face-to-the-wall?
Some things in this world are indigestible.
You wooed me with the wolf-headed fruit bats
Hanging from their scorched hooks in the moist
Fug of the Small Mammal House.
The armadillo dozed in his sandbin
Obscene and bald as a pig, the white mice
Multiplied to infinity like angels on a pinhead
Out of sheer boredom. Tangled in the sweat-wet sheets
I remembered the bloodied chicks and the quartered rabbits.
You checked the diet charts and took me to play
With the boa constrictor in the Fellows’ Garden.
I pretended I was the Tree of Knowledge.
I entered your bible, I boarded your ark
With the sacred baboon in his wig and wax ears
And the bear-furred, bird-eating spider
Clambering round its glass box like an eight-fingered hand.
I can’t get it out of my mind
How our courtship lit the tindery cages —
Your two-horned rhinoceros opened a mouth
Dirty as a bootsole and big as a hospital sink
For my cube of sugar: its bog breath
Gloved my arm to the elbow.
The snails blew kisses like black apples.
Nightly now I flog apes owls bears sheep
Over their iron stile. And still don’t sleep.
- Sylvia Plath


I recall going to the Brookfield zoo, near Chicago, when I was a little nipple nibbler. Back in the early 80’s they use to let some small rodent mammals run free, Squirrels, chipmunks, ferrets, and so on. Me and my sisters thought it would be fun to chase (I think it was a flying squirrel). At first it was great, until the little bastard decided to fight back. It must have chased me halfway around the zoo… Where were my loving parents, rolling around in animal shit laughing their asses off. I don’t think I have been to a zoo since… mental scaring and all.

http://www.sandiegozoo.org/wap/index....
It's only a bit north of the Zoo, and is dedicated to providing enough space for the animals to roam around in something like a natural habitat, and tours are provided on a tram.

Meghan, if we go to the zoo Jade just might get a present in the mail!
I like how everyone studiously ignores the Plath. It's like a big, tumorous rock in the middle of the room.

Giraffes are one of my favorite animals and I won't be able to see them at the regular zoo. :( Plus the cages will probably make me a little sad.


Actually they have online shopping at sandiegozoo.org. But that's not really the same as bringing home a souvenir.
Of course, I need to use up all of my stamps since the postage is going up again. Maybe I could stuff an elephant in an envelope and put fifty stamps on it, Mrs. Weasley-style. Heh.
Aren't you impressed though? You got your birthday and Easter stuff on time this year. Nay, early.

We saw a monkey try to hump an otter and the otter was having none of it.
After the zoo we went to see my friend Mara star in Dancing In The Dark with Scott Bakula at the Old Globe Theater. After the show Mara introduced us to Scott and I was perfectly able to resist the urge to say "Ziggy says there's a 75.8% chance that you're here to make sure the show makes it to Broadway." He was very nice and we got a picture with him, too.