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Covers, Blurbs, 1st Line, Query > Blurb for THE GRAVE TENDER

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message 1: by Eliza (new)

Eliza Maxwell At ten years old, Bailey Dixon's life was irrevocably altered. Since those few tragic weeks, she's tried to keep the past buried, but old bones have a way of rising up.

Grown now, with children of her own, Bailey can't hide any longer.

Haunted by a boy who never made it home, a woman who sings in moonlight and dances in flames, and the strange, scarred recluse who watches it all from the shadow of the pines, the time has come for Bailey to answer for her sins.

They say the truth will set you free, but sometimes it extracts a terrible price along the way. Is it a price Bailey's willing to pay?

At 70K words, THE GRAVE TENDER is women's fiction. It's the story of a family where no one is what they seem, the women at the heart of that family, and the extraordinary lengths they will go to protect the ones they love.


Any feedback? Would you buy this book? Brutal honesty, please.

Thanks so much!
A. Carter


message 2: by Eliza (new)

Eliza Maxwell Actually, I suppose I should clarify, not a blurb, but a query. Sorry about that.


message 3: by Elizabeth (new)

Elizabeth Davies | 43 comments I like this! It's not too long, contains lots of mystery and doesn't give much away.
I would certainly buy it based on this blurb.


message 4: by Allison (new)

Allison Newchurch (allisonnewchurch) | 18 comments I'd certainly look at it.

Personally I'd like a little more 'hint' at the events that changed her life, particularly as you also mention she has to answer for her sins.

Overall though, it's intriguing enough to make me want to know more.


message 5: by Shaeri (new)

Shaeri | 6 comments Okay, you got me wanting to know more about this one! :)


message 6: by Zach (last edited Oct 28, 2014 06:30AM) (new)

Zach Tyo (ztyo) | 55 comments It is definitely an intriguing query.


One thing that stuck out to me is the second paragraph. Keep in mind I'm no grammar king, but it seems like a mouthful. Grammatically it may not be bad, but I would consider maybe rewriting it just for that reason.


message 7: by Mocha (new)

Mocha Pennington | 55 comments Since this is an query, I would change the last paragraph to:

THE GRAVE TENDER is women's fiction completed at 70,000 words. Thank you for your time and consideration.

The link to the blog below has helped me a lot with the query letter process. In an entertaining but helpful manner, the blogger, who is a successful literary agent, critiques query letters.

http://queryshark.blogspot.com/

Mocha


message 8: by Eliza (new)

Eliza Maxwell Thank you guys so much for the help/ advice! I will take another look at that second paragraph and see if it can be clarified, Zach. And I'll definitely check out the link. Thanks again!


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