First four chapter questions

[Ruth]

We can edit this and post our questions up until chapter four.

[Iseult]

Great, thank you, Ruth 😊

[Ruth]

:)

[Iseult]

Ok, I’ve read the first 4 chapters and here are my questions.

[Iseult]

Q1. Considering how much Monique has gone through in the last 3 years, do you think this book started at the most interesting place to introduce her character?

[Iseult]

Q2. Based on Monique’s voice alone, what can you gather of her character, and do you think first person pov was the best choice to tell her story?

[Ruth]

Iseult wrote: "Q1. Considering how much Monique has gone through in the last 3 years, do you think this book started at the most interesting place to introduce her character?"

I'm not convinced that her pov is the best for this story. I'm not only going to say that I'm annoyed with the number of times she uses goddammit, dammit, bastards, and other harsh languages to express her anger. I will say that the story might've been better in a different pov based on the amount of backstory is given. I found the author struggled to provide the appropriate amount of action and backstory to balance the story.

There were times that I noticed very little action was taking place because the author needed to give backstory, which goes back to the previous question of where this story should have started. I feel based on the first chapters the story would've been better off in third pov and moved between Monique and other characters to better view the story.

A suggestion I thought of is that maybe it would trickle between someone in the Elites and to Monique. This way, we'd get a good view between what she's going through and what the Elites are planning and what purpose they have. It would've been more interesting and grasping for the reader, in my opinion.

[Ruth]

Iseult wrote: "Q1. Considering how much Monique has gone through in the last 3 years, do you think this book started at the most interesting place to introduce her character?"

No, I don't think it started in the best place. I feel that she may have wanted to start with action, as you said before, but it isn't the best place to start. I find the backstory is not developed and if she is trying to show us bits and pieces of it over time, it is going to be a disappointing read. There is a difference between keeping the reader interested and surprised and falling short of telling the story.

The story is incomplete, in my opinion. The nuggets of information provided aren't enough to paint the picture of how bad the kidnapping was and how bad the student sacrifices have been. Her anger isn't properly expressed and her fear isn't present in the words of the story.

I feel it would've been beneficial to start 3 years before in the action of her being kidnapped and maybe skipped ahead later in the book. There are a few different ways that would've been a good place to start.

[Ruth]

Here are my questions after reading the first 4 chapters:

[Iseult]

My thoughts exactly, Ruth. I totally agree with you.

[Ruth]

1. Is Monique a part of the Fairbrother family and she just doesn't know it? Given her foster care status, is it possible she's from the very family she hates?

[Ruth]

2. It could be me but do you think there could be a romantic twist later between Monique and Aventis? At the end of chapter 4, he seems invested in her as a student but there seemed to be a hint fo something more. Was it just the romantic in me?

[Ruth]

3. Do you feel that Monique is greater than all her peers and students at Venton Academy? Based on the author's voice, does she seem greater than all the rest? It is mentioned several times how no student can do things she can.

[Ruth]

4. Where do you see this story going? Can you predict where you think it will go, or is it just me?

[Iseult]

Ruth wrote: "1. Is Monique a part of the Fairbrother family and she just doesn't know it? Given her foster care status, is it possible she's from the very family she hates?" I think this is most likely. She is the most powerful child of the Fairbrother family, perhaps mixed with the next most powerful family's blood, forced to be abandoned by her parents at birth (or her parents killed because of their Romeo and Juliet style union).

[Iseult]

Ruth wrote: "2. It could be me but do you think there could be a romantic twist later between Monique and Aventis? At the end of chapter 4, he seems invested in her as a student but there seemed to be a hint fo..." Aw, Ruth, I love the romantic in you! I don't think there will be a romantic twist between them. Aventis is in his 40's and I am assuming Monique is in her late teens, although her age is vague (she went to the school at age 10 and she has been on the run for 3 years, but I don't know how many years she attended the school for). It is funny, because I read a sinister element to Aventis. He could just be the typical mentor character, but I am hoping that he is really the villain who has been coaching Monique for his own purposes all along. I wouldn't trust a word he says, and I bet he is behind the Elites!

[Iseult]

Ruth wrote: "3. Do you feel that Monique is greater than all her peers and students at Venton Academy? Based on the author's voice, does she seem greater than all the rest? It is mentioned several times how no ..." I may be wrong here, but to me Monique reads like a Mary Sue in a Harry Potter fan fiction. She is the most powerful, the most skilled of all, and she has had very little training because she only got her powers at 10 and then she had to run away. I don't mind this trope if it is done well, but I find Monique's very flippant attitude jars against the trauma we are expected to believe happened in her childhood and that, combined with her incredible (yet humble) skills, make her irritating.

[Iseult]

Ruth wrote: "4. Where do you see this story going? Can you predict where you think it will go, or is it just me?" Lol! I think I know where this story is going, but as it is the first in a series, I doubt much will happen in this book.

[Iseult]

Ok, I’ve read the next four chapters and have some new questions.
Q1. What is Monique’s motivations? She wants to hide herself from magic users, changes course to bring down the Fairbrothers after meeting Aventis and changes course again to save a student, despite doing nothing about the kidnapping and sacrifices for 3 years. Do you think her reasons are clear and well explained? How could this aspect of her character development be improved?

[Iseult]

Chapters 5-8 Q2. Who is Stanford? Do you feel as invested in him and Monique’s experience with him as the author perhaps wishes? Do you think the plot point of Monique’s kidnapping and attempted sacrifice would have a stronger impact on the reader if it had been seen?

[Iseult]

Chapters 5-8 Q3. The first four chapters went to great length to explain how Monique hadn’t been using magic for 3 years, yet now she is using it constantly without detection. What has changed to facilitate this? Do you think the device of her new charm is enough to explain her ability to use magic constantly without being found out by very powerful magic users?

[Iseult]

Ruth wrote: "Iseult wrote: "Q1. Considering how much Monique has gone through in the last 3 years, do you think this book started at the most interesting place to introduce her character?"

I'm not convinced th..."
I love that idea, Ruth. I think it would make the story much more compelling.

[Iseult]

Ruth wrote: "Iseult wrote: "Q1. Considering how much Monique has gone through in the last 3 years, do you think this book started at the most interesting place to introduce her character?"

No, I don't think it..."
I totally agree. I think three years earlier would be a much better place to start. I also think it is important for the reader to see the kidnap and sacrifice, as it plays such an important part of the book. At the moment it’s like starting the book in the middle.

[Iseult]

So for our September book, Magic Born, I rate it ⭐️⭐️. There were elements of the magic system that I liked, and I think the book had potential, but it was too repetitive and inconsistent for me to rate it any higher. Plus, the ending was a cheat.

[Ruth]

Iseult wrote: "So for our September book, Magic Born, I rate it ⭐️⭐️. There were elements of the magic system that I liked, and I think the book had potential, but it was too repetitive and inconsistent for me to..."

Thanks for rating it. I didn't get to the end and I'm sorry for not being able to answer the previous questions. I stopped at the end of Chapter 7.

[Iseult]

Ruth wrote: "Iseult wrote: "So for our September book, Magic Born, I rate it ⭐️⭐️. There were elements of the magic system that I liked, and I think the book had potential, but it was too repetitive and inconsi..." You were wise not to finish it. Life’s too short. Looking forward to Vile Blood.