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General Discussion > LOL Quotes - beware of reading these authors in public

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message 1: by Rye (new)

Rye | 37 comments “Props?”  She was almost afraid to ask.
“Just the usual.  Stethoscope, tongue depressor... scalpel, bone saw, rib spreaders… just the normal stuff.”
“Maybe in future you should ditch the props, be less Nurse Ratched and more soft porn first day on the job candy striper.”
Darcy look genuinely puzzled for a brief moment. “Where would the fun be in that for me?”
Jane Cousins, To Thrill A Thief

“So, hoss. Have you actually told her you’re in love with her?”
“She won’t let me. When I tried, she threw me down a flight of stairs.”
“And you’re not concerned about that?”
“There weren’t that many steps.”
Shelly Laurenston, The Mane Event

“Nothing drives home a win more absolutely for the Sanctuary than a severed head delivered in a Hello Kitty box, topped with a big gingham bow.”
Jane Cousins, To Handle A Hellcat

“Didn't we talk about this?"
"That isn't an answer." I planted my hands on my hips. "Was there a reason for shoving the gummy bears off the counter? Did they tell you they were suicidal? On second thought," I raised a hand, palm out, "don't answer that. If the candy is talking, I don't want to know.”
Seanan McGuire, Discount Armageddon

“You bought a prostitute on our date!”
Jane Cousins, To Shackle A Shrew

message 2: by Amy*skye.rhyme (last edited Apr 19, 2019 04:21AM) (new)

Amy*skye.rhyme | 58 comments "Hey." Levet gave a sharp flap of his wings.
"It is supposed to be farts before tarts."
"What the -" Santiago made a sound of disgust.
"Oh, for god's sake, it's bros before hos."

- Alexandra Ivy, Darkness Everlasting (Guardians of Eternity #3)

"She's one of those people who are like Slinkies."
"Yeah. Basically useless, but they make you smile when you push them down the stairs."

- Suzanne Wright, Feral Sins
(The Phoenix Pack #1)

My cell phone rang, and I tried to dig to the bottom of the sweat pants pockets to find it. Grabbing it with two fingers, I glance at the screen once I got it out. It was my best friend, Margo. Crap, I was supposed to call her about going to the spa. She dared me to go when I refused to in the first place. Unless I was going to get some hot dude rubbing up on me, there was no way in hell I would go voluntarily. He would have to put out, and I don’t think they have massage parlors like that for women.
“What up, yo.” I said, answering the phone. Trent glanced over at me with a raised eyebrow.
“Dude! What the hell? We were supposed to meet up at Man Hands Spa,” Margo immediately whined.
“A spa named Man Hands that is employed by mostly women isn’t something I want to deal with right now. Like I said, they need to have a man that is willing to put out.”
“Their last guy left last week. Plus, I don’t think they have guy spas like that.”
“Wave enough money at them and they will.”
Margo snorted. “Isn’t that like prostitution? Paying for sex.”
I was appalled with my BFF. “Seriously? You have to make them feel worth it. Money just makes them do a better job.”
“True, but still...”
“Say no more. I will pay for you, too.”
Laughing, Margo said, “Heck no! Dude, just promise to come over tomorrow night for dinner. I have someone you should meet.”
“Look, it’s not a blind date.”
"Do you have a dinner date?”
“Well, yeah.”
“So, the other guy is meant for me.” I made some crackling noises and then paused between every few words to make it sound like I was losing the connection. “Got. Go. Talk. Some. Bye.”
Hanging up the phone, I sighed in relief. Good thing I got out of that. Margo and her blind dates would be the death of me. She would have to try and trap me some other way. Pleased with myself, I look over at Trent who is smiling and shaking his head. “Don’t judge me.”
He raised both hands. “No judgment here."

- N.L. Hoffmann, Shadow Cursed
(The Daughters of Darkness #2)

message 3: by EmmaMay (new)

EmmaMay | 30 comments Rye wrote: "“Props?”  She was almost afraid to ask.
“Just the usual.  Stethoscope, tongue depressor... scalpel, bone saw, rib spreaders… just the normal stuff.”
“Maybe in future you should ditch the props, be ..."

Have to agree that some of my fave quotes comes from Jane Cousins and her amazing Southern Sanctuary Series.
But my all time number one would have to be.

“And you’re overthinking things, Charming. Do the math. Naked, interested man, check. Wet, willing woman, double check. Now insert part A into slot B and we can move on to the engineering portion of our quiz today.”
To Fight A Fate To Fight A Fate (Southern Sanctuary, #11) by Jane Cousins

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