Fringe Fiction Unlimited discussion
Fun & Games: Worst Muse/Others
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Let's play The Worst Muse
Absolutely never waver from proper grammar, word usage and punctuation.Each line of dialogue should be tagged with he/she said.
Fragments are the enemy. ESPECIALLY in first-person POV.
That weird, wacky plot idea you've just thought of involving penguins and toothpaste isn't because of the flu, it's because you're a genious! It needs to be at least 500 pages!
Deus ex machina are the best way to wrap up any plot. Readers cannot identify with characters that save themselves.
Don't bother writing. Get an online group of strangers to write everything for you.
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Don't stress yourself over coming up with an original idea. Just file off the serial numbers and call it your own.
Don't bother with research. It stifles the imagination.
Use wikipedia as your only source for research, because you know wikipedia is never wrong.
Don't be afraid of hyperbole. The more adjectives, the better.
"If you are going to use the word 'but' to contrast what's already been said, make sure you start a new sentence every single time. Cardinal rule. No exceptions."
The same cardinal rule applies for "and."
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Courtney, I think you're pushing it. Everything you do is fine ;)
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Hehehehe...Okay, back to the game.
"Maybe you should use a thesaurus instead of a dictionary."
Courtney wrote: "Yeah I'm just going to take everyone's advice after this for my novel :p"Actually, this is shaping up as a really good satire.
Write yourself into a corner? No worries, throw in an extraneous character to solve the problem.
"Don't worry, no one ever expects your characters to have any real choices. It's only fiction."
"Make sure to follow every piece of dialog with an adverb. How else would we know you wanted to convey the character said something breathlessly, enthusiastically, or even angrily?"-Socrates
---Michael Scott
(Couldn't help the reference from The Office.)
"If you're writing romance, the heroine must be a virgin.Always.
I'm serious.
Like, she never even knew sex was a thing before she met the hero."
"Don't worry, horror doesn't have to involve anything actually scary."
Rachel ~ SnapDragoness wrote: ""If you're writing romance, the heroine must be a virgin.Always.
I'm serious.
Like, she never even knew sex was a thing before she met the hero.""
Painfully funny. As in "I laughed so hard I hurt myself."
Also, the hero must be a super-stud sexpert at twenty-five.
Courtney wrote: ""Isn't 'unbidden' a great would? Make sure to use it twice a chapter. ""Hahahaha! *dies* I just used that less than an hour ago!
Courtney wrote: ""When describing the eyes of characters always use gemstone analogies. Who cares if nobody has irises the same shade as an emerald or sapphire? It's fiction and authors are entitled to an artistic..."This one too!
@EG"Also remember to make your romance hero filthy rich. Women only like billionaires."
Don't want to make this a romance bash fest, though. Every genre has its tropes. : )
"Don't use commas. Commas are for overachievers."
"Not sure how to use a semicolon? Meh. Just wing it."
Rachel ~ SnapDragoness wrote: "@EG"Don't want to make this a romance bash fest, though. Every genre has its tropes. : )"
Don't be afraid to bend the laws of physics. Alternate universes have their own laws.
@Eva, my alternate universe is breeding 'sparkly wombats.'
You will fascinate your readers if you use several homonyms in one sentence. For instance: Despite the beer he could not bear to bear the bare bear on a bier with his bare hands.
E.G. wrote: "@Eva, my alternate universe is breeding 'sparkly wombats.' "Yay for alternate universes! Bah-humbug laws of physics!
@Lily "If you're writing about real places, make sure what you're writing is a travel book."
Lisa wrote: "Berry bad indeed :D"Breaking bad bear.
"Real settings only belong in non-fiction. Stop being so creative."
It's not necessary to research the history of the places in the travel books - take the locals' word for it.
Find your locals online, in random chatrooms or dubious corners of the Internet.
If you have an Asian character he/she must be smart. African American female? Must be sassy! Follow all the racial stereotypes! Your characters don't need dimension...really.
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Never mind continuity. If you forgot to make plot points line up in your book it's okay to assume the reader will either figure things out or forget about it entirely.Also, skip vast amounts of time with no explanation.
No one is going to notice if your heroine changes her name, after all don't we all have a middle name or two?
1 - post outrageous/audacious/awful suggestions or pointers on writing like you're 1000% serious. Also use "_" so we know you're giving sage-like advice.
2 - Keep it short - like 2-3 sentences.
3 - feel free to lol or express your appreciation but don't get off-topic discussing the bad advice you read here. Start a new thread please :)