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1×1's > What Are Rules- Jay x Billie

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Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments What Are Rules?

Nowadays, it's hard to find a church willing to accept you for who you love or what you identify as, sometimes they'll tell you that you're going straight to hell or they'll tell you that being gay is a deadly sin and then slam the church door in your face. However, for Muse A, he found his calling as a priest within a church that fully supports the LBGTQ+ community and recognises those who identify as a gender that is not their birth gender. Muse A is a middle-aged, homosexual man who prefers his lovers between the ages of 18 and 25; he began working at _____ since he was 21, after discovering that he liked men and finding that he wouldn't be accepted at any other church, he went to _____. Muse B and his family have been going to _____ ever since Muse B was a baby; his parents didn't want him subjected to the teachings of the other churches, as they didn't believe in their teachings, as they didn't want their children to be told they weren't valid just because they were a different gender or liked the same gender or all genders. When Muse B began to realise that he liked guys more than girls, he turned to his priest, Muse A, a "professional" homosexual man. Muse A readily agreed to help Muse B understand himself, and after a few weeks of teaching the young boy, Muse A began to realise that he's fallen for the boy. Afraid to confess his feelings in fear the boy didn't feel the same, and because the boy's father was in one of the most deadliest biker gangs in Grimsby, California, he decided it was best to let his feelings fester. However, Muse B began to notice the rapid decrease of affection that he had once been receiving from Muse A, and decided to confront Muse A about it. But, it seems fate has other plans and Muse B ends up in the bed of a man he never thought he'd bed with, will Muse A continue to push Muse B, or will he cave into his desires and pursue something with the young boy?

— Jay ( you ) to play Muse B ( who will be 18-25 in age )
— Muse A, played by Billie ( me ), should be at least 25-35 in age

message 2: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments Thanks for making the thread, shall we create our characters?

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Sure, I'm thinking of making my character 27, if that works.

message 4: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments That totally works!

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments || Finn Patrick Walden ||

| Basic |

Age: 27
Birthday: December 23rd

Gender: Male

Orientation: Homosexual

Occupation: Pastor at Grimsby Inclusive Church

Education: Bachelors of Science
Major: Psychology
Minor: Religion

| Appearance |

Eyes: Deep Blue
Hair: Black & Curly
Height: 6'3" 190.5 cm
Weight: 160 pounds 72.7 kg
Build: Athletic

| A Little More Personal |


Heavily tattooed, gay, and possessing a bachelors degree in Psychology, not exactly what most people think of when they hear "Pastor." Still, Finn doesn't see any problem with who he is or how he portrays himself to his congregation. It wasn't something he expected, to be the pastor of a church. Growing up, his father was an ultra conservative religious zealot, turning Finn away from the life of faith.

Within his first two years of college however, Finn found himself yearning for something more. Psychology had always interested him, but he felt the need to do something more, to be something more. It wasn't until he had already graduated that he found himself working at the church and within a year they had hired him as their lead pastor. It was quite a lot to take on, giving the sermon and caring for the members, but Finn loves it more than anything.


▪︎ Observant, Focused, Driven
▪︎ Trusting, Loving, Compassionate
▪︎ Self-Aware, Giving


✔︎ Quiet evenings
✔︎ Outdoors; Woods, Mountains
✔︎ Caring for Others


✘ Not Knowing What to Do
✘ Arguments, Violence
✘ Crowds of People


↑ Curiosity, Creativity, Intelligence
↑ Passionate, Open-minded, Dedicated
↑ Hard-Working, Resourceful


↓ Complicated
↓ Fixated, Idealistic
↓ Self-Critical

| Family Ties |

Family Members:

Jessica: Mother Deceased

Carson Sr. : Father 57

Carson Jr. : Brother 34

Hunter: Brother 32

Angelica: Sister 25

Family Relations:

Finn came out to his older brother Hunter when he was a teenager. Hunter proceeded to tell their father and Carson Sr. gave Finn a beating he would not soon forget. Ever since that day, the relationship has been strained. Once Finn moved out and went to college, Carson Sr. cut off contact with his son completely. Sometimes his younger sister will text him, but even that is limited.

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Also, I put in a random name for the church, and I can change it later.

message 7: by j a m m e s (last edited May 29, 2018 04:55PM) (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments


Full Name: Lucian Simon Mael
Nicknames: Lu, LuLu, Luc, Luci, Lucia, Lui, Cian, Si, Sims

Age: 18 years old
Birthday: 05/07
Zodiac: Taurus

Ethnicity: Australian, British, American, Greek
Nationality: American
Languages: Greek, Latin, English ( US ), English ( UK )


Hair: Blonde
Eyes: Blue
Height: 5' 9"
Weight: 128 lbs
Build: Lithe

Honestly, most people would kill to have a really religious family who accepts their children for who they are and accommodates to their children's new lifestyles, for Lucian Mael he didn't need to kill to have that kind d family as he already lived within one. Sara and Ashton Mael were religious people who did indeed believe in God, and in Jesus; however, the thing that set them apart from most of their fellow peers was the fact that they didn't follow in the teachings of most churches. They believed that Jesus and God loved all, and that homosexuals and people beyond male and female, were not sinning nor would they go to hell. They believed that everyone, homosexual or not, female/male or not, should be allowed to live in peace and love who they wish to love.

When Lucian was born on May 7th, many people asked the parents whether or not they'd have him baptised, Ashton informed them that they do not wish to push religion onto their children; many were amazed and others were disgusted, most people believed that children should be taught religion as soon as possible. As Lucian grew up, he had to be taken to the church as his family did not wish to leave him at home. However, Sara never took her son into the actual Nave, and instead used the babysitting services provided by the church for parents who didn't wish to take their babies or young children into the church. When Lucian was five years old, he was asked what he wanted to do now that he was able to understand so much, ( more than what kids are supposed to understand in his age ), and he said he wanted to attend the services with his family. So, starting at age five, Lucian Mael, along with his eight older siblings, began to attend service at the Grimsby Inclusive Chruch.

His childhood was quite alright and he began to learn things about his family, his once brother now sister was just transitioning into a beautiful woman; his second brother was happily in an relationship with two men; his third brother was living a single life and attending bars around the city; his fourth brother was now a freshman in college just realising that he is agender and is bisexual. His older sister is just about to marry a girl and have a baby with said girl; his second sister met her musical idol and is now attempting to follow her dreams of a music career; his third sister has dropped out of high school, has started dealing drugs and getting piercings and tattoos; his fourth sister is now a sophomore in college in Hawaii, and constantly calls him to check in on him.

High School was deemed the hardest part of Lucian's life, treated as if he was a god in his own home and at school, he had hoped it would be the same entering High School. However, as soon as he stepped foot into that school, he was pulled in every direction known to mankind. Starting freshman year, he made friends with a large group of friends known to have major relationship issues, aka the popular kids; getting into constant screaming, and constant drama pertaining love and crap, you'd think they'd take a hint and stop dating one another al together.... but then again most of them aren't too bright. Starting sophomore year, he ditched his popular friends and started hanging out with the weird crowd, the people who had tattoos everywhere and piercings in every part of their body; people hoped he didn't start doing that, and were happy when he didn't. Starting junior year, he began to drift away from those friends too, settling instead with people who were different from everyone else, those who were deemed sinful for their preferred terms and preferences... the LBGT+ community.

Starting Senior year, he can't help but wonder if the reason behind his sudden connection with his friends was because he was somehow a part of their community... coming out to his parents and family was hard, but with the help of his sisters, and his brothers, he realised that it was okay to be different. However, he decided to get more help with his sexuality, and who better then his favourite Pastor, Finn Walden? Grimsby High's sexiest and hottest pastor according to his friend Gabriel.

Lucian Mael is known to dress like he's this quiet little boy who does nothing but listen to his parents all day and plays Für Elise on the piano as soon as he gets home from school... however, that's not Lucian Mael at all. Lucian Mael is a stubborn, hard-headed, sarcastic little shit bag, who does nothing but constantly makes shitty jokes, and uses sarcasm to get out of most things. He could honestly care less about people who treat others like crap, and he tends to beat up those who harm others, ironic I know, but who wouldn't do that? He's been dubbed the Violent Saviour at High School, protecting his LBGT+ friends by punching people in the face for the derogatory comments they used, and threatening girls that he'd tell their deepest darkest secret to their parents and their boyfriends/girlfriends. He's the most caring, and loving person you'd ever meet, some would advise you to just not get on his bad side and everything would be fine.

↳ Hair Dye, Tattoos, Piercings
↳ Beaches, Oceans, Islands
↳ Chocolate, Ice Cream, Cake
↳ Hugs, Kisses, Sex
↳ Men... just Men

↳ Bullies, Pain, Blood, Crying
↳ Sitting, Being Still, Unmoving, Sleeping
↳ Cereal, Bread, Butter, Milk
↳ Insects, Arachnids, Pests, Urchins
↳ Cats... just Cats

↳ Caring, Loving, Compassionate
↳ Creative, Intelligent, Brilliant
↳ Open-Minded, Level-Headed, Likable

↳ Sarcasm, Violent, Strange
↳ Vunerable, Weak, Depressed
↳ Hollow, Stubborn, Awkward


Sara Mael (neé Anderson) - Mother
Ashton Mael - Father
Alexander Mael Grandfather
Julia Mael - Older Sister
Abraham Mael - Older Brother
Thaddeus Mael - Older Brother
Jordan Mael - Older Brother
Hanna Mael - Older Sister
Jaqueline Mael - Older Sister
Annalise Mael - Older Sister
Victoria Mael - Older Sister

Shiloh - Male Beagle named after the dog in Shiloh
Isle - Female Black Pug
Winnie - Old Male St Bernard, fiercely loyal to Lucian

— Gabriel Asther ( Best Friend / Brother )
— Bertha Asther ( Best Friend / Sister )
— Mackenzie "Mack" Debian ( Best Friend / Brother )
— Zachary "Zee" Fernandez ( Best Friend / Sister )


Sexuality: Homosexuality
Crush: Finn Walden
Virgin: Sorta...
Kinks/Position: Blasphemy Kink, Choking Kink, BDSM, Submissive

— never really believed in God, but respected his families beliefs so much that he began to believe in the man just a little bit.
— has this cute little mole under his left ear, people compliment him on it and says it looks like a heart
— never goes anywhere without Winnie, unless he has to go to school, or he's with friends, or he's with Finn, or his family ( mostly goes everywhere with his father rather than anyone else )

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Oh, I love him!

message 9: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments And I love yours! So where shall we begin with this?

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Did you want to start when Lucian first comes to him for advice, or do you want to start once they've already been hanging out a little?

message 11: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments It doesn't matter to me, we can start wherever you're comfortable starting or where you imagine them starting off

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Hmm, maybe we could start once they've met a few times and they are comfortable enough that Finn starts having the meetings at his apartment instead of the church?

message 13: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments Okay! Could you start us off?

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments It had been a fairly long day at the church; sorting through sermons and plans, consulting with members of the church, preparing for a wedding. Of course Finn loved his job and wouldn't have stayed so long if he hadn't, but it could be draining. Tonight he had an appointment with a young man who he had been talking with about the things that troubled him. Lucian was a very smart young man and seemed to really have his wits about him. Finn was glad that in his position he could help younger people find there way, and Lucian was no exception.

There had been something stirring in Finn, however. He wasn't sure what it was, but it had started when he first began counseling the boy. Ignoring whatever it was, Finn had set up their time today to be after he got home, around dinner time. Walking into his quaint apartment, Finn hung his jacket on the coat hanger, revealing the tight black t-shirt underneath. Seeing as the boy probably hadn't eaten dinner yet and Finn hadn't either, he began cooking some pasta. Cooking was one of the things Finn was relatively good at, but he rarely had a time to do anything with it.

message 15: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments
Lucian had been surrounded by members of the LBGT+ community for as long as he could remember... there hasn't been a day that goes by that someone of a different gender or sexuality comes up to speak with him. Ever since news of his coming out had reached the ears of Grimsby's very own teenage gossiper, Ellie Barns, people have been approaching him non-stop to either congratulate him on coming to terms or to simply ask him how he came to figure himself out. As soon as he began to deal with these things, he began to turn to his pastor, Finn Walden. He didn't understand all this excitement over his coming out and he didn't know what to do about it, he didn't want to tell people to leave him alone if they asked how he came to figure himself out, he could help someone if he knew how to explain it.

Most boys usually kissed a boy and that's how they knew, others found their sister's or mother's magazine full of half naked men and wanked to them, and others simply realised it on their own. Lucian had found out on his own and after being kissed by his best friend's older brother, and he was now stuck in a loop of what the hell he should do now.

For weeks he's been talking to Finn about all of this, telling him almost everything that led up to this sudden realisation. They had become somewhat closer now, equals if you may, they share similar qualities and similar backgrounds, except Finn was beat by his father, and Lucian by the hands of his one of his old friend's father. He found solace in Finn and hoped Finn found solace in him too, he didn't seem them as friends or anything, acquaintance more likely.

He informed his parents that he was heading out, his mother stopped to ask if he'd be home for dinner, he informed her that he'd be eating at Finn's. She saw him off to his car and told him to try and be home by midnight, which had been his curfew since he was eleven years old. He promised her he'd would and drove off, stopping at all stop signs, waiting for every green light, pulling over and helping an old man or woman across the street, and he even helped a woman carry her babies and grocery bags up to her apartment. He finally made it to Finn's and headed up to the apartment, car keys in hand and backpack on his shoulder. Feeling his phone vibrate, he pulled it out and turned off his phone, no reason to be disturbed while talking about serious matters at hand.

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Finn honestly couldn't remember when he realized he loved cooking so much. Throughout his childhood, his father had insisted it was women's work and he shouldn't do it. The man thought cooking could 'feminize' his son and disallowed his son from doing it. Still, his mother had died in childbirth with his younger sister, and Angelica was a pretty lousy cook. It wasn't uncommon for their fire alarm to go off any time she was left to make meals for the family. When their father wasn't home, Angelica would let Finn sneak in to do the cooking, but Finn was pretty sure his father knew the entire time.

It had been somewhere around seven months since he had heard from his little sister. Of all of his siblings, she was the only one who still spoke to him, but it wasn't like it was before. Growing up, they were each other's best friends. Now they were casual acquaintances, wishing each other happy birthday or Merry Christmas. He should be grateful for that, he knew. It was more than anyone else in his family communicated with him. He missed them, despite all that his family had been through, he still loved them and missed them with all of his heart.

Finn had known what the consequences would probably be before he had come out. Carson Sr.'s stance on homosexuality was very well known in his family. The first time Finn had ever heard of homosexuality was in the context of a lesson his father was teaching them about "the worst types of sinners." It still was somewhat surprised to Finn that he chose to become a pastor after everything he had gone through with his family, all the indoctrination, hate, and violence.

After some time, the meal was almost completely ready. The smell of the dish had grown to fill the entire apartment. All of the utensils, plates, and cups were already sat out, ready for when Lucian arrived. Living alone, there weren't many occasions that gave Finn the excuse to cook up a nice meal, so he was glad to have a reason now.

message 17: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments
At least three people had stopped to ask him if he was alright, considering he had been standing on the doorstep of the apartment building for the last eighteen minutes now. He couldn't quite understand what brought this sudden fear came upon him, it's not like it ever stopped him from entering the apartment of his friend's older brother. He pushed open the door to the front door of the apartment building, he took a deep breath and sighed heavily as he began making his way towards Finn's apartment. He couldn't believe that this would be the second time he's been in this man's apartment, he didn't really remember the first time, as his father explained that he was a baby when he had first been within the apartment. He found the apartment number easily by smell, as he knew Finn liked to cook; there was no way he could really know that Finn liked to cook, he just oddly remembered hearing the pastor talk about it a couple times to his parents after service.

He knocked on the man's door and stood patiently outside of it, he saw a cat walking aimlessly around the hallway and wondered if it belonged to anyone, not seeing a collar or tag, he had to assume it belonged to the building as a whole. He crouched down, fully aware that that Finn could open the door at any point and see him making noises while staring at possible nothing. The cat intrigued him to a point where he had to touch it to make sure it was real, when the cat cautiously came up to him, he gingerly let his fingers through it's fur, smiling when it began purring at the contact.

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Hearing the knock at his door, Finn quickly cleaned up the little bit of mess he had made in the kitchen before heading to the door. Suddenly there was some amount of nervousness in the air, though he couldn't quite put a finger on it. It was odd, Finn hadn't felt nervous about anyone coming over in quite some time. There was really no reason to be nervous, he was simply counseling the boy over what he had been going through. Brushing past any feelings he might have been having, Finn quickly opened the door; revealing the young man bent down petting the cat.

Smiling widely at the sweet boy playing with the cat, Finn found himself overcome with what some might refer to as the 'warm and fuzzies.' Keeping the door open, Finn only momentarily let his eyes wonder over the skinny blonde male at his doorstep. "Evening Luci, I see you've made a new friend there. Cat's name is Cheshire, which if you ask me is a bit on the nose." Finn spoke with his deep baritone voice that carried fairly far, even without any of the microphones.

message 19: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments
It was quiet within the hallway and the cat was enjoying the attention, quickly marking the blonde boy as his new object of affection as he does with certain building tenants. When the door suddenly opened and dull orange light pooled the dimly lit hallway, the cat gave Lucian a gentle nip on the hand before dashing to the safety of the dark. The blonde boy now squatting stupidly in front of his pastor's door was blushing quite embarrassingly, "Quite fitting," he managed to murmur before standing to his full height which wasn't much compared to Finn who was so much taller.

He also realised that the older man had called him Luci, which was something that no one else has ever called him, they called him everything else and every curse known to man, but never Luci, that he realised had been reserved for Finn. He didn't know when the nickname started, but it had always been Finn who called him that.

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Lowering his eyes to meet the shorter male's Finn gave him a warm smile. In typical friendly greeting, Finn wrapped an arm around Lucian, embracing him before letting him go. Once more there was a tinge of something that Finn couldn't quite place, but he ignored the thought and stepped back into the apartment, allowing Lucian to enter. Unlike many pastors, Finn was fairly casual, wearing a semi-tight black t-shirt, black jeans, and not really worrying too much about how his hair looked. Without his jacket on, his tattoos were much more prominent.

Some in the congregation had issues with his body art when he first started at the church, but they had long since resolved them. Finn was pretty unapologetic in his lifestyle, not feeling like he owed anything to people who would judge him from his appearance. As he allowed the boy to enter, Finn smiled slightly, "Hope you're hungry, I made a bit too much pasta honestly... So, how was school today?"

message 21: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments
When Finn hugged him he had went rigid in his spot, unable to comprehend that his pastor just hugged him until a moment into the hug when he wrapped an arm around the older male to return the friendly gesture. He picked up his bag and walked into the apartment, glancing around as he entered the home; it was spacious and gave off a homey vibe. He set his backpack down on the coffee table and then began to pull off his black hoodie that he had been wearing for most of the day.

Lucian was an observant boy and knew when something was off, he knew when someone was flirting with him, and he knew most people's emotions before they could even exclaim it themselves. He set the hoodie down over his backpack, "Is that Pasta I smell?" Lucian questioned.

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Shutting the door behind them, Finn moved into his apartment and smiled slightly, "Yeah, I think I may have made a bit too much, so I hope you are hungry!" Walking back into the kitchen, he stirred the pot and gestured to the bar stool next to the table in his kitchen, "Come on in and have a seat, Luci." The food was now ready, just needing to be served.

Taking a ladle, Finn dolled out a portion for each of them, then pouring the sauce over top of it. Placing one plate in front of each stool, Finn spun around to get drinks. Pulling Lucian's favorite soda out from the fridge, he sat it in front of him, "So, how have things been since we last spoke?"

message 23: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments
Lucian stretched his arms above his head for just a moment before approaching the table and taking a seat where Finn had gestured too, he chuckled as Finn explained to him that he may have made too much of the pasta. "I would imagine so, cooks tend to make as much as they think they'll need instead of what they actually need," he said with a small shrug as he glanced around the kitchen.

He messed around with a loose string on his band-tee and focused on a small spot within the tabletop, he thanks the older male when the food and drink is set out in front of him. He sighed and picked up the fork, "Its going better then usual, people are questioning me less, and congratulating me less, I'm finally able to walk down the halls without people oggling me and asking me how it feels to be out and proud," he answered with a shrug. "I've finally come to terms that I have a crush on my best friend's older brother too," he said.

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments As the younger male started to speak about his crush, Finn felt something inside of him growing. It wasn't until he was almost passed the thought that he realized what it was that had been happening. He had feelings for the young man. The realization hit him like a ton of bricks, bringing blush to his cheek bones. How could he not have known that was why he had been feeling the way he was? It was so clear now! Pushing the feelings aside, Finn knew he would have to deal with them later.

Moving to sit next to the boy, Finn smiled, "That sounds good. I'm glad you aren't feeling so much pressure now. Now this other boy..." Taking a bite of the pasta before continuing, "How much older is older?" It was more of a genuine concern rather than a jealous thought, but it might have been a mixture of the two.

message 25: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments
While Lucian was observant in many, many, many different ways... when it came to feelings it usually took an bad accident or incident to take place before he realised what he was feeling and why he was feeling it. As of right now, he was unsure about how he currently felt about Finn, but was damn sure about how he felt about his best friend's brother. He shoved a forkful of pasta into his mouth, and almost choked on it when asked about his crush on this boy .

He managed to swallow his forkful of food and then glanced beside him at Finn, "Well, I recently went to his birthday party that his college friends were throwing up, and if I remember correctly, he just turned 25," he replied as he looked at Finn. He blushed, "Uh... for my birthday present to him... we made out for like four hours, and he gave me so many hickeys along my neck......" he said and then trailed off, knowing the hickeys faded but were probably still noticeable. He felt so uncomfortable now without his hoodie.

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Finn was surprised at the other boy's age, but not too shocked. Whenever he had discussions with his flock members, he tried to never judge them, but offer council. Upon hearing about the birthday, Finn nodded, taking a bite of the food himself. Once he had finished the bite, he commented, "So, the feelings are mutual, I take it?" The room's temperature seemed to have dropped since the oven went off, and Finn wasn't sure when it had happened.

Standing as he continued his conversation, Finn walked over to the thermostat and turned it up a little, making sure they wouldn't be too cold. Upon his return, he noticed the slight marks were he could presume the crush had been sucking on the boy's neck. Taking his seat back, Finn added, "Now, does the brother know about any of this?"

message 27: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments
Lucian didn't pick up his fork again, it's not that he didn't want to eat, it's just that he didn't want to eat while talking about his stupid crush on some body who probably didn't like him for who he a actually was... despite the other older boy saying quite the opposite. He sighed, and rubbed the back of his neck, "If you're talking about if he knows about my crush.... and that I like him, I'm going to go with yes, as he literally marked me a couple days ago," he said pointing to his neck.

He began to grow even more uncomfortable if that was even possible, he stood up and walked over to where he left his hoodie, he pulled it back on over his head and glanced over at Finn before returning to the man's side. He sat back down and shoved some food into his mouth, it was a little cold, but he actually didn't mind it as much.

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Finn realized he hadn't clarified what he was asking, but didn't say anything immediately. Seeing the boy get up and grab his jacket, Finn wasn't sure if the boy had been cold or just uncomfortable with the fact his marked neck was now visible. Again, Finn elected to say nothing, just eat until the boy returned to the seat. With both of them now sitting back down on the chairs, Finn looked over at him, "Yeah, sorry, I meant your friend, the one who's your age. Does he know you have a crush on his brother, and that you made out with him?"

Finn made his glances to the boy even shorter than before, now aware he had been looking for possibly too long. It needed to be clear that they were just a preacher and someone who he was counselling, he needed to keep any other thoughts out of his head. Now more than ever he needed to keep up his professionalism

message 29: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments
Lucian nodded when Finn asked the proper question that he had meant to ask, he finished eating what was left on his plate, creating a silence between them until he was finished. "Mason is actually the one who's encouraging this entire relationship between me and his brother, most people would be disgusted to learn that their best friend has a crush on their brother, but not Mason. No, he's actually quite okay with it, and claims that his brother and I are OTP, whatever that means," he said quietly. He cleared his throat ( I guess throat isn't a body part nor does it exist because my autocorrect always changes it to something else, it pisses me off! -_- ), and took a drink from the glass in front of him, "Harrison has been through so much, and it's so hard for him to find anyone that loves him for who he is, and wants to be with him for more then just sex. When he met me, he told me that he was sure we'd be together for a long time," Lucian continued.

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments (( How do you want this to play out? They have a dinner talking about his crush and then Finn cuts off contact? ))

message 31: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments (( Yeah, that works. ))

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Finn nodded, taking in the information the boy was giving him. To buy himself some time to come up with a response, he took the assortment of plates that were in front of the pair to the sink, beginning to rinse them off. Looking over his shoulder to Lucian, Finn started, "It sounds like everything is going well, I think. So why do you call him a crush if it's mutual? Are the two of you not dating?" As he waited for the response, Finn cleaned off the plates and set them in the dishwasher which was practically empty at that point. He didn't often have company, and he sometimes preferred to use disposable plates.

message 33: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments
Lucian shook his head when asked if he and his crush were dating, "No... I told him that I needed some time before I decided to actually start going out with him. I wanted to be sure of my feelings before I actually got with someone... I don't want to be the kind of person who goes out with someone but then realises they don't love them like that," he replied. He stood from the stool, "I... that's why I came here... because I needed some kind of help or something, coaching I guess," he added on.

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Finishing up the dishes, Finn turned around to hear what Lucian had to say. Leaning against the counter, he crossed his arms across his chest, understanding now. "Oh, okay... You need help finding out if you have more than just a crush on him?" Running a hand through his jet black hair, Finn thought about how he could help the boy. "Well, when you think about him, what do you feel? The first thing you feel, don't think about it too much."

message 35: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments
People usually warned him that if he paced too much that his eyesight was going to go wonky and his body was going to be very sensitive to every turn or stop he made, and honestly, he wished he could stop. But when Lucian paced, he thought, and when he thought, he made beautiful words spew out of his mouth or whatever crap people say about that. He sighed, and began to pace, "When I think of him... I think of how happy he makes me, of how different it feels to be with him than a girl, of how happy I make him... that's what I think when I think of him," Lucian said.

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Finn took in the information he was given from Lucian and watched him pace back and forth. It was a habit he had noticed the boy had some time ago, but it didn't bother Finn at all. "That sounds really great, Luci..." Fin said. Often people already knew the answers in their own minds before they came to talk to him, they just needed reassurance. "If you're looking for a guarantee that it'll last forever, I can't give you one, but you should trust yourself. If it makes you happy to think about him, it's probably a good choice to be with him." After another moment to thing, Finn breached an awkward thought, not only as an older friend to the boy, but as his pastor.

Uncomfortable with what he felt he had to say, Finn ran a hand over his face, "Uh, just... If you're going to be with him in an intimate sense... I mean, you know to use protection right?" It was a very awkward subject, but one many young gay men didn't talk about. Still it was important.

(( I had an idea; what if this Harrison guy does something to hurt Lucian and that is why he tries to get Finn to talk to him again, but Finn is pulling away because of his feelings? And then maybe Harrison does something worse that makes Finn have to come back? Just an idea, let me know what you think. ))

message 37: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments
When Finn began to mention protection, he put his hand up to stop him and shook his head vigorously, "Please don't bring that up! It was bad enough that all three of my brothers, and my parents had to explain all of that too me, and it was really embarrassing too since I already knew about all of this. The school district made it a must for Sex Ed classes to teach us about gay sex between two boys or two girls," he said as he shook his head. "I know to use protection, and I also know the dangers of anal sex and all that," he added on to reassure his pastor.

"And... I think I knew that it probably won't last forever like he wants it to. I'm not one for long term relationships really, I find that too cliche, but sometimes I wonder if I find the right person, if that will change for me," he said, replying to when Finn mentioned that he couldn't give a guarantee for a long term relationship.

message 38: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments (( that sounds like an awesome idea.... well awesome in a sense that it would bring Finn and Lucian closer together ))

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Finn nodded with a slight smirk on his face at the boy's embarrassment about protection. For Finn, it had been important to mention because he had grown up in a very isolated conservative town, nothing like the one he lived in now. It hadn't been so obvious in his youth that there was a real need for it. In response to the boy's pleas, Finn gave a small chuckle, "You know, you're lucky your school is so inclusive, but I won't mention it again."

Hearing Lucian's thoughts on long term relationships, Finn nodded, "I think that is a very healthy way to think about things. Who know, it might change in time what you want. Do you have any other concerns about it that would keep you from dating him?"

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments (( Cool! ))

message 41: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments
Lucian narrows his eyes when he noticed Finn's smirk, obviously entertained by Lucian's embarrassment about sex talk; pouting, he looked down at the ground. When talk moved along to his school, Finn saying that Lucian was lucky, he had to agree as most schools weren't so inclusive. "Well, Grimbsy is not like most towns, in fact, according to research, Grimbsy is the only city in the world that is so inclusive and accepting," Lucian said.

Lucian had to think about the question for a moment, "Not at the moment, but Im sure something will come up," he said with a shrug.

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments Finn smiled over at the young man, happy at how much he had grown over their sessions. Running a hand over his face, he sighed, thankful he didn't have to be in his teenage years again. "So, anything else I can help you with or you want to talk about?" It was one of the first times Lucian hadn't come with a whole slew of things to talk about, but that was a good sign. It meant he was doing better.

Finn, of course, hadn't had a super easy time adjusting, but he knew times had changed. Lucian was so young and his generation hadn't had the same experiences, even if there was only a nine year difference. Things were really looking up for young LGBT people, and Finn couldn't be more happy about it.

(( OMG! I am so sorry!! I didn't get this notification! ))

message 43: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments
(( No worries ))

Lucian stood there for just a moment as he looked at Finn Walden, he couldn't help but wonder when the obsession or infatuation started, but all he knew was that he hated lying to almost everyone about who he really liked, and who he really wanted to be with. Finn Walden was the only person that Lucian ever trusted with information like this, because he knew that Finn would never ever reveal this information to anyone, not only would that completely go against confidentiality. In this exact moment, he wanted to confess everything that he's ever felt for Finn, everything he's ever imagined, all the sexual fantasies he's had of Finn pressing him against every furniture of his house and taking him right then and there.

"I don't really know if I should talk about it or not, there's something inside of me that's trying to tell me that what I'm feeling is wrong, and that if I like someone else, I shouldn't be thinkinig about someone else...." Lucian said, and he just stared at Finn. He began to think that perhaps he shouldn't be here, talking to his crush, talking to the man he's fallen in love with in such a short amount of time, he sighed and quickly began to leave. "I-I-I'm sorry, but I have to leave, I can't stay here longer or I'll say something I regret... I'm sorry. But I think we shouldn't talk anymore, Aiden doesn't like it when I talk to other guys," he murmured and quickly left, closing the door behind him.

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments When they were looking at each other, Finn could almost have sworn he saw something in the boy's eyes. But just as soon as he thought he was saying something, the boy was running off. He didn't even have a chance to say a word to the boy. Rushing after him, Finn opened the door and started to call out, "Luci, I-" But he cut himself off when he saw the boy was no where to be seen.

Heading back into his apartment, Finn kicked a pile of unsorted things in his living room, frustrated with himself. What had he said to set the boy off? Grabbing his phone, he shot the boy a quick text, "Hey Luci, just wanted to tell you I'm sorry I upset you. You know you can always talk to me about anything. Any time. If you feel like talking, feel free to call or text, or even swing by if you need something."

message 45: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments
Multiple tenants who were sitting outside their apartments talking to their neighbours, watched as Lucian ran down the halls and hurried down stairs, they watched as he gently sidestepped so he didn't trip over the building cat, and noticed hot tears streaming down his face; worst of all, they heard Finn calling out to the boy, and began to make assumptions, to which most of the tenants would probably ignore Finn by tomorrow morning including to tonight. There was nothing more that Lucian wanted to do then to throw himself off the tallest building in the north side of California.

When Lucian Mael was depressed for as long as anyone could really remember, he was diagnosed at age thirteen, just before he entered middle school and it was very hard on his family considering that many middle schoolers loved to make fun of him for how many of his siblings were "gay" and how he was going to turn out to be just like them. His family had moved him from school to school for most of his middle school life, and finally he attended Grimsby Middle School, a private school in which a pastor at the church had helped the Mael family enroll Lucian into. He began to learn how to deal with his depression and how to handle it, but now after what happened with Finn, he didn't think he was going to be okay, and he knew that if his father found out.... Finn would either have to skip town or get killed, by a 6' 5" tall, 293 pound man who beat people for a living.

He turned on his phone to see who texted him, he noticed fifteen missed calls from his best friend Gabriel; 45 missed text messages from said best friend, and a recent text message from Finn. He read the text, and sighed softly, 'Finlay.... he sent, using the nickname he recently came up with for the older male. I'm not upset at you, I could never, I just... my brother needed me today, said he wanted me to be there when he got his first tattoo' Lucian sent, which wasn't actually a lie.

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments It didn't make a lot of sense, what the boy had said compared to what he was now saying in text. It was obvious that wasn't the real reason he had fled, but Finn didn't want to embarrass the boy. The fact that he had mentioned that Aiden didn't like when he talked to other males was a bit disturbing, but he pushed past it. Instead, he replied simply, Wish him luck for me.

With that, Finn decided it was time to turn in. His mind was all over the place; wondering what everything had meant, but mostly shocked that he hadn't realized his own feelings earlier. This was not good, he would need to bury those feelings down deep inside of him. Keep them secret, even from himself. They were not acceptable thoughts to be having for the barely legal man who had trusted him implicitly.

message 47: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments
Lucian had taken his father's motorcycle here considering that his own had been taken to the shop to be modified and to be upgraded with better parts. However, when he glanced up from his phone, he noticed that his father's motorcycle was not where he left it, and he began to freak out until he spotted two familiar red-heads standing beside their truck. "Gabriel, you little asshat... you almost gave me a heart-attack," he snapped as he walked over to the male red-head and hugged him tightly before turning to the female. He pinched her cheeks, "and how's my favourite strawberry?" He teased, managing to dodge her punch as she raised her fist to punch him.

'I will,' Lucian sent before getting into the passenger side of the truck, first allowing Bertha to get into the truck first. When they were all buckled and comfortable, Gabriel drove off to the tattoo parlor, where he would be receiving his first tattoo.

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments (( Want to skip to when they boyfriend/ fried with benefits does something to Lucian? ))

message 49: by j a m m e s (new)

j a m m e s  (thepanbigensister) | 12431 comments (( Yeah, sure, if that's what you want to do ^u^ ))

Billie [ Hiatus ] | 68 comments

It had been somewhere near a week since the last time Finn had spoken to Lucian. Finn figured it was probably for the best that they spend some time apart from one another. Especially once Finn realized he had feelings for the boy. It wasn't right, and he knew that. He could not have such feelings for the boy- well man- he was mentoring. He was of legal age, of course, but he was far too young. Not to even mention the fact that he was the man's pastor first.

The clock read about four o'clock and Finn was working in his office, preparing the sermon for the next day. He wasn't sure what all he still had to do for the day, organizing a few things on his desk.

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