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1x1 > Morgan இ Кἆяἆ : Not a Disease

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☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Here we go. :)
Not a Disease
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Muse A and Muse B have known each other forever. They grew up in a small town, that is very tight knit and religious. Everyone shows up for Sunday mass and everyone knows everyone. Muse A and Muse B started dating though, when they were fourteen and they managed to keep it hidden for two years before Muse A's parents found out about it. They sent him away, horrified and disgusted that their son had fallen under Satan's spell. That he caught the gay so to speak.

They sent him to a place in Fair Haven that has been known to successfully "cure" people from the sin of homosexuality. It was hell for Muse A, the first four months were the worst he ever could have imagined, but then something happened and everything they were saying some how started making sense. And he started really getting into the program, until he was eventually sent back home "cured". He plans to stay that way too, he didn't want to disappoint his parents again. He couldn't stand the look they had on their faces when they found out. But what happens when a few accidental run ins with Muse B starts to make old feelings resurface. Will he fall back into what started all of this and accept himself or will he just continue to deny it to make his parents happy?

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Did you have any questions or anything?

message 3: by Morgan (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments No, none atm :))

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Okay, awesome. Want to go right into making characters?

message 5: by Morgan (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments Yup! I'll have my guy up soon just have to finish some homework XD

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Okay, I'll have mine up soon.

message 7: by ☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ (last edited May 22, 2017 11:11PM) (new)

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Name: Lucas Eugene Lawson
Nickname: Luke
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Gender: Male
Age: 17
sexual Orientation: Homosexual
Height: 5’10
Appearance: Lucas has dark styled short hair, with brown eyes.
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(view spoiler)
Personality: Lucas' probably the nicest guy you’ll ever met, hardly a mean thing you could say about him. He's pretty easy going and really doesn't get mad or upset all that often. Though when he does get angry it's best to just stay away from him. To put it simply, people have often made the mistake of pissing him off twice. That being said he does generally get along with everyone, though he's not the popular type. He does like participating in sports though, his favorite being hockey. He's been the captain of the team since he was a freshman, one of the first. He's pretty charismatic so he makes a great leader. The saying the eyes are the window to the soul really holds true with Lucas. They often reveal exactly what he's feeling or thinking. Which really makes it hard for him to lie, his eyes always give him away.
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(view spoiler)
History:Lucas' parents sent him to a clinic called Fair Haven hoping they could bring back the son they wanted. The one that wasn't gay. It didn't work at first, he spent several months resisting everything they tried to do to him. A year passed before he finally graduated from the clinic. He was sent back home determined t stay on path, he wasn't gay. He was the child his parents always wanted him to be. He was normal. Least that's what he kept telling himself. ((More details about his time there TBRPed))
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(view spoiler)
Other:He is always wearing this necklace. His grandfather gave it to him many years ago and he has barely taken off since.
(view spoiler)

message 8: by Morgan (last edited May 22, 2017 04:35PM) (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments his personality, eyes & necklace are exactly like Alec's XD

I just have to find a face for my guy and I'll have him up!

message 9: by Morgan (last edited May 22, 2017 06:36PM) (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments

malachi san
goes by Kai

male · bisexual · 19

(view spoiler)
Growing up with an alcoholic parent there wasn’t much Kai could depend on as a young child. For that reason he became greatly independent and practically devoid of most emotions expected from most children that blurt out how they feel every minute of every day. Kai himself was never inquisitive or curious about anything- only knowing that questions were meddlesome and only earned a slap across the face or a knee to the abdomen. The young boy also had to make up fourth grade when he had too many absences. There must have been something in his favor considering that year he was a fresh face to the newly minted fourth years and for that reason he was interesting, and had far less baggage with them than he did with his previous class group. The fact he was learning how to avoid his father’s angry drunken fists only aided him. From there on things seemed relatively normal, Kai was slow in the communication process but learned how to open up little by little. Later in middle school he was quick to find an under the table job in order to start helping out around the house- especially considering his mother’s money left in her will was running out and his father’s bottles were running dry, only causing the man to get more antsy. Nevermind the faulty fridge and the lack of electricity. It was in his junior year that everything changed and he had another monumental shift in his life when Lucas suddenly disappeared- something about a vacation or some shit like that. Of course he highly doubted it but he never looked into it, instead making destructive decisions like turning to alcohol and a number of other choices that’s left him with more than a few hangovers- most of which also ended with him being blackout drunk. Really before the other guy left he didn’t realize how much he depended on his presence for some form of stability. In recent months though he’s pulled some of his act together and he’s doing his best to maintain two jobs so that he can pay for some subpar community college and eventually get out of this town and away from his father.

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments I know I used the same format and forget to change more of the details. I meant to change the personality up a bit more, but was in a hurry. Will do that later haha.

Love your guy by the way.

message 11: by Morgan (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments Haha okie XD


message 12: by ☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ (last edited May 22, 2017 11:14PM) (new)

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Okay, I changed up his personality and changed his necklace.

I'll start us off right away, so it move along a little faster. haha.
If you have any question at all go ahead and ask. :)

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Lucas paced around his bedroom trying to decide if he actually wanted to leave the house today. He's been home for almost a week but has yet to actually leave the house. He knew no one knew why he was away, from what he heard everyone was told that he was with grandparents. He just didn't want to run in to anyone and have to talk to them, he knew it would lead to him having to lie. He hated lying, mostly because he was really bad at it but there are a few moral reasons as well. Though mostly he didn't want to run into him, didn't want to have to try and tell him that they were done. It was going to be painful and hard and it could make him question everything. He was strong in his resolve to stay true to god, to not sway into sin again. He just wasn't sure if he was ready for that much temptation already.

Lucas sighed softly, deciding that he was being a ridiculous wimp and seriously just needed to sack up. He ran around his room for a moment to get ready to leave, finally changing out of his pajamas into some day clothes. He put on some dark blue jeans and a light blue t-shit before dawning a cap and some sun glasses. It was pretty warm and sunny out so he really wouldn't look to ridiculous. He still kind of felt like a wimp because he was trying to half hide his identity, but for now he didn't care. Wasn't like it was going to work in this small of a town anyway. He paused at his bedroom door for a moment contemplating whether he should put on a sweeter or not. One glance down at his arms answered the question immediately, and he quickly grabbed a one out of the closet before heading out.

Lucas left the house and started walking down the street, just really in need of some sun and fresh air at this point. It was hot and uncomfortable in the sweeter, but he didn't want to be seen without it on. Just to self conscious right now. He didn't really have a destination in mind, just needed to get out of the house and away from his parents. They were kind of driving him insane, they just continually asked him if he was sure that he was okay. That he was sure he was actually finished with the program, that he was done having those thoughts. He just really needed to get away from them, try and relax for once since he got sent away in the first place. Though he wasn't so sure walking around this town was going to be the answer for that.

Lucas stopped walking when he realized where his feet had taken him. He really hadn't been paying all that much attention to all of the turns he'd been taking but here he was. He'd just left the town's limits and was standing at this old park near the river. It was where him and Kai had their first real date. They set up a picnic and just spent the entire day together. If he was being entirely honest it was still top of his list for best days of his life. Even with his new conviction it wasn't knocked off it's pedestal. "God why the fuck did I come here" he muttered and shook his head slightly before turning to walk away.

message 14: by Morgan (last edited May 23, 2017 01:56PM) (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments
Honestly… Kai would have had to live under a rock if he didn’t hear the news that Lucas Lawson was back in town every few seconds. It didn’t help that before the guy left the two of them were always seen together at school- so everyone felt it was their business to inform him of what they had heard. None of them knew of the true relationship between the two though. And obviously he wanted to hop in his beat up jeep and go find out if it was true, but it had been a week now and no one had seen him in school or out and about The only way that Kai could cope with the fact he was back in town was doing exactly what his old man had been doing wrong all of these years. So he found comfort in a bottle- showed up to school practically buzzed from the night before and pretended his heart wasn’t being ripped out by the fact Lucas had yet to visit. Hell. He hadn’t even contacted Kia in the last year. Really, he shouldn’t give a shit at all- but he had a hard time turning his feelings off in the same way he did when he was twelve.

Tired of the bullshit from school and the constant reminder of youknowho Kai slipped out one of the backdoors of the school before heading into a light run towards the parking lot. He was almost home free when Vanessa appeared at his side. Looking down at the cheerful four-foot-nothing brunette he faked a similar smile to her own. Instead of greeting her he didn't say anything, only unlocking his car and watching as she welcomed herself into the passenger seat. Well- it was better than day drinking alone.

They made idle conversation as he waited for his jeep to stop rumbling haphazardly after he shoved the keys into the ignition. “Going to our spot?” She asked with both a girly and sensual tone. Nodding his head he did his best not to grit his teeth. He’d practically tainted the place at this point- especially if Vanessa was calling it their spot, as if it was something between them and not something between him and Lucas. He ignored it though reminding himself there was no point in caring what she called it. After all if the other guy hadn’t reached out to him at this point there was certainly no worry of him ever showing up there again and reclaiming the spot as their own. In fact when he got so liquored he could almost get to the point where he was numb enough not to be faced with the heartbreak.

Pulling into the lot he parked the car. It was only after Vanessa had slithered into the back to get the booze that he noticed the figure in the park. Instantly his heart began to hammer in his chest as he recognized the man who stood out against the contrasting autumn leaves. Gathering himself together he let out a long sigh before throwing his gear shift into reverse- not wanting to confront the situation at that moment. The movement threw Vanessa backwards, but he didn’t even think to ask if she was okay as he suddenly slammed on the breaks. No. He needed answers- something more than a pathetic half assed goodbye. Setting himself back into park he silently got out of the car, stumbling a bit before gaining his footing.

Kai was hardly in a rage, but anyone would be a damn fool not to notice the anger that struck his face.
“Conveniently enough, I’m wondering the same thing.” He said, his arms crossed over his chest- standing only a foot away from Lucas as he had just heard the words he’d muttered. It took all of his effort not to curse or go on into a tangent. Somehow he managed to stand there turning his expression into one of stone as he stared down the person across from him.

message 15: by ☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ (last edited May 23, 2017 01:22PM) (new)

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Lucas froze in his tracks when he saw Kai, and shit did he look mad. Anger hadn't been something he had considered when he pictured confronting him, because in his mind he somehow knew where he had actually been. Wasn't fair of him, but he'd just really wanted someone to know what he was going through. "I.... uh.... I need to talk to you" he said a bit awkwardly not really sure how to go about this. Should he lie and just go with his parents story or tell the truth. Either way the conversation was going to suck and end badly. "I'm sorry I didn't call, didn't exactly have access to a phone, or the internet" he said started, but stopped when he saw Vanessa getting out of the car. "Oh.... uh....know what it really doesn't matter....." he said and quickly turned to walk away in the other direction.

Of course he's moved on already, it's been a year with no contact. Who wouldn't have moved on after that much time going by without a word. Guess there wasn't going to be any explanation at all, which was probably for the better. He was a terrible liar and the truth would probably just set back any progress Kai made in moving on. It hurt seeing him with someone else, but it wasn't like they could be together anyway. He'd planned on breaking things off with him, he just didn't know things were already broken. Though he probably should have guessed.

message 16: by Morgan (last edited May 23, 2017 02:09PM) (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments
“So talk.” Kai wasn’t about to coax him into talking or coddle him in any sort of manner. After all it wasn’t like he was the one who skipped out of town without a single world. At the mention of no phone or internet he let out a snort. “Oh, and you couldn’t find some ink and parchment either?” Rolling his eyes he turned on his heels a bit so he wasn’t facing him directly as he waited for him to go on. The worst thing happened though when the other man spotted Vanessa. He stopped talking. Despite Kai’s anger he hadn’t wanted that to happen. He wanted a god damn explanation, and if he wasn’t going to get one… Hunching his shoulders a bit he faced him, grabbing his arm and spinning him around.

“Oh no you don’t.” Kai said, holding him in place by the shoulders. His touch wasn’t really one that would immobilize Lucas but his stare was. Just as suddenly as he was keeping him there he threw his hands up in the air and let out a sharp laugh that he felt like he’d been holding in for a long while. There was nothing humorous about the sound at all. “Here, I’m sure Vanessa would love to know where you’ve been too. The whole bloody school wants to know where Lucas Lawson went off to.” He said, his tone hoarse as he waved over the girl who was by his side in seconds, in spite of her short legs. She seemed to take the brown haired guy in before letting out a gasp when she recognized him. It was an entirely dramatic action and he clenched his fists in his pockets while continuing to watch Lucas, his jaw set at an impatient angle.

message 17: by ☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ (last edited Mar 04, 2019 12:49PM) (new)

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Lucas sighed softly when Kai twirled him back around. In seconds he knew it was a bad idea to try and move again just from the look in his eyes. He shook his head slightly, "It's none of her or anyone else's business where I've been...... But fine you want to know...." he paused a moment. Since Vanessa was there he was definitely going with the lie, he wasn't going to have the truth spread around town. Vanessa was sweet but she had a big mouth. "We were together for what two years before we came out, turns out my parents didn't care for it. They sent me to my grandparents to get away from you. I didn't get in touch with you because they wouldn't let me and believe me I tried" he said and crossed his arms over his chest. "But it didn't matter I eventually met someone else, a girl, I fell hard, but she cheated on me. I was heart broken, grandparents decided I wasn't actually gay so it was okay to send me back here." he said and shrugged slightly. "Happy" he said with a forced smile before quickly turning around to walk away.

Lucas knew Vanessa would buy the story she wouldn't be looking for signs that he wasn't telling the truth. He wasn't so sure Kai wouldn't be though, didn't help that he was a terrible liar. He had about a million different tells and Kai knew everyone of them. He was just hoping the other male was to angry to be paying close enough attention to catch any of them.

Lucas looked down at his arms as he walked away thankful that the sleeves of his sweeter didn't ride up when he crossed his arms. He shook his head before picking up his pace, wanting to get as far away from this place as he could. Wasn't their place anymore, it was just his. It was Kai's.

message 18: by Morgan (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments
Kai held himself steady trying not to flinch, “So it’s none of my business either?” It was hard to believe that standing across from him in this moment that they’d ever even been each other’s business. He continued to stare at him with a steady gaze though as he continued with his story- which mostly seemed like bullshit and lies. He knew for a fact if Lucas was actually sent to his grandparents he wouldn’t have just tried to reach him he would’ve damn well succeeded. Unless of course their relationship meant nothing to him. Automatically he tried to throw that thought away. Sure they’d been a year younger, but they weren’t too young to know what love is. Then Lucas threw the story of the girl in his face. Taking a few steps back and away from him he didn’t even notice Vanessa’s head whipping back and forth between them as if this was going to be the story of the century. “Wouldn’t know anything about heartbreak, but ok.” If he’d been in a more rational mindset he would’ve told him you can’t just turn your feelings off for someone like a switch. If it were that easy he’d certainly be over it by now- and he thought he was, until now apparently.

Shaking his head he didn’t bother with a response as his eyes followed Lucas for a moment as he walked off. Relaxing his shoulders he grabbed Vanessa’s hand. “Come on.” He muttered, doing his best not to so much as haul her back to the jeep. Once there he reached for the booze she had clinged to her chest with her other hand. “Bottoms up.” He said, popping open the lid before taking a large swallow of whatever the fuck it was they had. Kai ignored the burn that went down his throat as he took another huge sip and got back into the car. “Where to now?”

message 19: by ☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ (last edited Mar 04, 2019 12:56PM) (new)

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Lucas ran basically the entire way back to his house, deciding it had in fact been a mistake to leave the house. He hadn't been ready to confront Kai, and he certainly hadn't planned on doing it in front of an audience. Not that it mattered, his parents had been very clear on the matter, he was going to school tomorrow. So he'd just have to push aside any emotional turmoil and just act like nothing happened. Like he had actually been had his grandparents and was just suffering from a broken heart. It was the only way he was ever going to get past this. He'd just have to try and forget his time in Fair Haven, not that that was even remotely possible. The place still haunted his dreams.

Lucas ignored his parents greetings and questions when he got home and just went right up to his room. He plucked off his hat and shades and tossed them onto his desk before peeling off his sweeter. It was way to hot outside for it and he was glad to finally be able to take it off. "Tomorrow will be better" he whispered to himself as he laid back on his bed. The hard part was over, he confronted Kai and now that part could be done. Though he'll still probably have to go over the story about a hundred more times. Something he really wasn't looking forward too. He'd just have to sack up and get through it though, because once that part was done everything could go back to normal. Well close to normal anyway.

As he laid back on his bed and actually managed to relax a little he realized a few things. Things weren't going to be all that bad, he could start playing sports again. He always enjoyed that back before he was sent away. He'd probably be a little rusty, but nothing practice couldn't fix. Then he could also start hanging out with the guys again, which would be nice. Would definitely get his mind of things. He'd just need to figure out how to keep his arms covered, or more so his wrists.

~The Next Day~

Lucas sat in his car just outside of the school, trying to relax a bit before venturing inside. As he sat there he went over the lie he'd told Kai over and over again, tweaking it a bit to make it sound more like the truth. Luckily it would be a lot easier to lie to the rest of his classmates then it was to lie to Kai. Kai knew him way to well, he had to of known he was lying. He couldn't think about that right now though, it made him to anxious.

Lucas sighed softly before grabbing his bag out of the back seat of his car. He pushed all thoughts of Kai aside and just focused on the now. Right now he was going to school, he was going to reunite with old friends, baggage free friends.

message 20: by Morgan (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments Like any other night in the last three hundred and sixty five days plus, Kia spent it living recklessly. Somewhere along the way he passed out at Vanessa’s house, which was far more of a comfort than doing it at his own place. At one point during the night he’d even gone so far as to type out a number of long winding paragraphs to Lucas before he managed to stop himself- which was a godsend considering drunken texts weren’t necessarily something he was a pro at. In fact they were pretty counterproductive in his case. In recent months he hadn’t sent all that many, but he had after Lucas’ disappearance got to him, but at least he could be grateful for the fact the guy didn’t have contact with his phone or else he’d see the pathetic desperation for contact- which clearly hadn’t been a priority the other one had in his life. Kai could only guess and hope that the other guy didn’t have any access to his phone, a true blessing in disguise.

In the morning he woke up on his friend’s couch, running his hands roughly over his face to wake himself up as he let out a deep sigh. Stretching out his limbs he made his way over towards the bathroom he’d frequented more than once- turning on the shower to the coldest setting, another method to wake himself up from his hazy state. Spotting an abandoned beer on the countertop he took a swig before stepping into the shower. Starting his mornings and ending his days with alcohol seemed to be his routine now- he hardly remembered the lunch he had yesterday and his stomach was protesting a shower, insisting on breakfast instead, but he ignored it. After a quick wash down he toweled himself off before welcoming himself to the pantry and pouring himself a bowl of cereal. Going into the fridge he also grabbed the milk- putting it into his bowl until the last drop.

Hunching his shoulders he sat in the kitchen with nothing but his towel, glad that Vanessa’s parents were absent from her life almost as much as his own. Except they were actually productive with their time- on business trips and everything of the sort. Sometimes it took them to different states, different countries, or different continents entirely. It must have been a dream come true to get out of this small town every once and awhile. When Vanessa entered the kitchen he waved a greeting before they fell into a semi-decent conversation. He couldn’t talk to her about anything per se, but at least it filled in the silence. Either way she was a natural gossip and would spend hours talking about some people he hardly knew aside from their names.

After having finished his breakfast he pushed himself away from the counter before grabbing his bag where he had an extra pair of clothes. Shoving his legs into a pair of jeans and then slipping on a loose fitted black t-shirt with his usual jacket he nodded his head. He tried to balance himself in his usual daily routine- he wouldn’t let Lucas throw him off kilter. Not again. He had his shit together… or so he tried to convince himself. Truth be told he skipped his shift at the local diner last night. Luckily he got someone to cover for him, but another act like that and he’d be at risk of losing his job. Pressing a hand against his forehead he tried to mentally will the impending hangover away, whispering a thanks when Vanessa practically shoved a glass of water into his hand. Taking big gulps she also gave him an ibuprofen to take care of some of the issue. It wasn’t a permanent solution, but it would have some effect on him for a few minutes.

Gathering the rest of his things they got back into his jeep and heading off to school. Upon arrival he helped the girl out of the car before slinging the bag over his shoulder and heading into the building with a look of determination. This morning there were no more whispers of youknowwho, and no one even stared in his direction aside from a few friends who greeted him and asked if he was still on for the party this weekend. Hell yeah, he was.

message 21: by ☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ (last edited Mar 04, 2019 01:01PM) (new)

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Lucas walked into the school and paused a moment, it felt strange being back here. Been a long time since he's walked down these hallways, since he's seen any of these people. Definitely didn't feel the same. He just had to stopped a moment to take in the place, before he glancing back down at the papers in his hand. It was his new schedule, with his locker number at the bottom of it.

Luckily he actually knew where he was going so he was able to find the locker quickly rather then having to wander aimlessly. It wasn't until he was at his locker that people start walking up to him, most of them were quick though. Just people who wanted to say glad you came back blah blah, good to see you. blah blah been a long time blah blah blah, just crap like that, which was a huge relief. He thought he'd have to answer more questions then that. But nope only the people he'd been really close with really asked him any questions. Then again they were probably the only ones that cared enough to ask. Rather then just hear it through gossip and rumors that got spread around.

Though everyone had moved on to their classes, he was having a problem being in the crowded hallway, kind of felt like the walls were closing in on him. He could feel his breathing and heart rate start to pick up and just felt like he needed to get out. Like he needed to get away from all these people and just have some space to breath. For that reason he didn't bother with trying to unlock his locker and just hurried to his first class room.

The room still had quit a few people in it, since the bell was about to ring, but he could feel himself calming down. Which was another huge relief. It's happened a few other times since he's been back, and he knows exactly what it was. Though it really wasn't something he wanted to think about right now. Which why he quickly shook the residual feeling off before going to find a place to sit down.

message 22: by Morgan (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments Kai hung out in the hallway with a few of his friends, going over a number of plans for the weekend, all of which he somehow managed to schedule around his work hours. Who knew when he’d even find the time to do his homework, but every day that shit seemed to be less and less of a priority of his. After all, he was a senior. Almost home free. Then, after community college, he’d be out of here fast than anything else, and he would never look back. The thought always brought a smile to his face and made his small town life seem a little less bleak.

Eventually the first bell rang, signalling there was three minutes before the first period. While Kai had rung up a great number of absences he was never tardy or late, and he definitely never missed his first class of the day. English was probably the only reason he bothered to crawl out of bed (or whoever's couch he’d crashed on) in the morning- that and his architectural design class, the only one where he felt he could turn off his brain and just work with his more creative side.

He stopped in front of room 203 on the first floor, saying a soft goodbye Vanassa before he slipped into class. Generally, Kai was the kid who opted to sit in the back and pull a hood over his head so he could avoid any and all attention from teachers and their hackling questions. Fortunately enough this wasn’t the case in Mrs.Dorsey class. She was a young woman who had began working here during Kai’s first year as well. In fact he’d had her for freshman class before choosing to take another two of her classes for senior electives. One thing he enjoyed about her was her openness to interpretation and her patience for all students. That and he may or may not have had one or two mental breakdowns in her presence at the beginning of the year, and after that it was easy enough to say he had a close relationship with her. Sure she might have been just a few years older than him herself, but if anything she was the best mother figure he’d ever had in his life. Or even a parental figure, and he hated to disappoint her.

“Good morning Malachi.” And she was the only one he tolerated to call him by his actual given name. In reality he was actually Malachi junior, named after his deadbeat dad. Usually when she said the name though it didn’t sound so dirty, and it sounded more like it belonged to him rather than something that was tied to his old man. He offered her a smile in turn before saying good morning and sitting down in his usual seat in front of her desk, stretching out his legs and pulling out the assignment that was due for today’s class. Sure he’d gotten shit faced last night, but he’d done this days ago, always willing to work hard and be ahead in this one particular class.

message 23: by ☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ (last edited Mar 04, 2019 01:08PM) (new)

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Though he had his notebook out Lucas didn't spend any of his time in class taking notes. Instead he was kind of hunched over mentally trying to slow his breathing and just trying to calm down. Sure he'd calmed down a bit once he was out of the crowded hallway but he still just didn't feel quite right. It wasn't until he heard the teacher starting to wrap up the lesson that he finally felt more like himself. He'd tried listening a few times but just couldn't make himself focus on the lesson when all he could hear was his heart beating in his ears.

When the bell rang Lucas stayed in his seat for a while, wanting to wait out the crowd a bit before heading out. That was basically how the entire day went, but luckily he never actually had a full blown panic attack or even close to it. He hadn't had one class with Kai yet either, which he'd found kind of surprising. What were even the chances of that happening, seemed kind of unlikely. He was kind of relieved though, and just hoped his luck would hold up for his last class. One that should be relatively easy to get through, gym.

Since it was his first day back Lucas had to stop at his locker before heading to the locker room. Having known his schedule ahead of time he'd brought in extra clothes for the class. He hadn't wanted to be that one kid who had to sit out because they hadn't brought in their clothes. He really just wanted to fit back in as easily has he had before he left. Not that he ever saw that happening.

Because of the extra stop Lucas had been running late to class so he was just about the last one to enter the locker room. The scent of sweat from different men hitting him just as quickly as all the noise. He had used to like being in the locker room, and it wasn't just because of all the half naked men. No it had been a nice place to change and just hang and laugh with the boys. Now it just was loud and crowded, and smelled terrible. It wasn't just that though, Kai was here. Lucas closed his eyes for a moment and just took in a deep breathe before picking a spot a little ways away from the crowd.

With shaky hands he started pulling his gym clothes out of his bag, trying to be quick but failing. He fumbled with the fabric barely able to keep a hold of it as he tried setting it on the bench so he could change. It was hard to concentrate on the task at hand though, when he felt like the walls were closing in on him again. He shook his head a little trying to shake the feeling away before just turning to face the locker. He tried using it to keep himself steady and to ground himself, that was what all the articles he'd read told him to do. It didn't help though, he squeezed his eyes shut and tried concentrating on something else anything else, but it didn't help. It just kept getting worse.

Most of the people in the locker room didn't really notice what was going on with Alec and the ones that did didn't really care to investigate. They were all so engrossed in whatever they were talking about that they barely looked his way as they filed out of the locker room and into the gym.

message 24: by Morgan (last edited Jun 07, 2017 09:29PM) (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments Kia’s day went relatively smooth- granted that was all before third period when the news finally reached his ears. Considering how quickly everyone had interrogated him when Lucas took off he was surprised at how slowly any word of him had reached him. Then again, maybe people were making the assumption that he had already known. But how could he?

Between passing time he practically sprinted down the hall until he found friends, praying he wouldn’t run into the other guy. Yesterday had been bad enough and he did not want a repeat. He didn’t want to hear that absolutely absurd story about him falling in love with some shitty girl while being at his shitty grandparents house and then getting his shitty heart broken. Yup, the pettiness was real, though it was also warranted. Kai didn’t need a reality check for this situation to know that his feelings were one hundred percent justified.

When he arrived to his multimedia art class he stopped dead in his tracks at the door. He didn’t even need to enter to see the back of that familiar dark head. Rolling his eyes towards the ceiling he gritted his teeth and calculated whether or not he had enough days were this absence wouldn’t come back to bite him in the ass. Figuring it didn’t matter whether or not he’d get a two hour detention he turned right back around the way he came. Instead of going to drink in his car or smoke some green with friends he opted for the library. It was only once he arrived that he realized how tightly his fingers had been clenched to his calculus book. Releasing it on the table he let out a heavy sigh. That class was ranked up there as one of his favorites, but he sure as hell wasn’t going in there just yet. He would… sometime next week, but right now he wasn’t too concerned about it. Yeah, he could sit on the total opposite end of the classroom and pretend that Lucas didn’t exist, but he was sure comments would be made and conversation would be unavoidable.

Knowing he needed something to focus on before he got lost in his thoughts and itched for the flask in his bag, he pulled out his English homework. Sure he was a week or two behind in math and astronomy, but those things hardly mattered. Passing grades were still passing grades. Instead he focused on the book they were reading, getting involved with the text and marking particular passages about love as that seemed to be the big theme of the unit. Really, if he was being honest he just wanted to right a whole essay about how none of it mattered and everyone dies at the end of the road anyways, so there’s no point in finding what little love there is out there. Love was fleeting anyways, and these books that preached eternal love were just hyping it up way too much. Clearly he was in an absurdist mood.

From there Kai didn’t make it to many of his other classes, until his second to last period which was gym. Effortlessly he played a game of basketball- two against two with his team in an obvious lead. Once it was all over he laughed with the boys as he headed back into the locker room. He hadn’t really been adamant on changing though, seeing as he was already in a pair of sweatpants, which was his average outfit lately, and way too comfortable to change out of. Kai had the last period free and leaned back against the lockers as his friends changed. After coming out of the closet he’d gotten some shit about being in here, but he’d rolled it off and soon nobody said anything.

While the day had been rather satisfactory, it seemed Kai had some sort of bad luck as a certain dark haired boy showed up. Crossing his arms over his chest he practically drilled his eyes into the floor while muttering to his friends to hurry the f*** up so they could get out of there. Initially he was actually planning on possibly sticking around for a double gym, but that was not happening anymore. No way. Really, if he’d been smart he would’ve left the locker rooms as soon as he’d spotted Lucas.

“Hey, I’ll meet you guys outside.” There was a questioning tone to the statement, but otherwise Kai didn’t stick around for an answer as he made a hasty retreat towards the exit. He shouldn’t have paused, he shouldn’t have looked back over his shoulder, and he most definitely shouldn’t have been concerned with what sort of visible state Lucas Lawson was in. Letting out a mental sigh he rolled his eyes up to the ceiling in the same manner he had done earlier in the day. And… no, his feet were not moving back towards the row of lockers. No, he was not going to make sure that the other guy was okay. No.

Apparently his brain couldn’t comprehend that word today, though, as he suddenly found himself facing Lucas’ back. Hesitantly he reached out, avoiding any possible looks from others as he placed his palm on the others back. “Hey, are you okay?” He hadn’t meant to sound so gentle. Honestly, he wanted to sound detached and like he didn’t give a single shit, but Kai just wasn’t that kind of person- or at least not when it came to him.

message 25: by ☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ (last edited Mar 04, 2019 01:15PM) (new)

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Lucas flinched away from the other males touch the sudden feeling overwhelming his system. The sound of his voice barely making it through the pounding in his ears, he was about to say no, cause honestly he could use some help. But then he saw who it was, and thought better "Yeah, I'm fine" he said, though since he could barely get the words out it was pretty obvious that he wasn't. He shook his head slightly, deciding it wasn't wise to try and use words again. His breathing was too erratic to get any words out, and not only that but he felt like he was getting sick. Like if he even dared to open his mouth up far enough to talk he'd just spew his lunch all over the floor.

Lucas slowly and shakily moved to kneel on the floor still using the lockers to try and steady himself. It was difficult task to achieve with them shaking so much, with his whole body shaking. Even moving slowly be barely managed to make it to the floor before just falling to the it instead.

Though now really wasn't the time there was really just one thought running through Lucas's head right now. It was playing on a loop in his head making him feel worse then he already did. "I'm sorry" he struggled the words out through labored breathing having to pause a while between the two words. Speaking the words somehow made the nausea worse, but for the moment he pushed through it. "I lied" he said, again struggling to get the words out.

Though at this point it made no difference to Lucas, the locker room was empty. Apparently no on but Kai had really noticed what had been going on. The lack of teacher or any other students in the room made that pretty clear.

message 26: by Morgan (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments When he felt the other boy’s reaction to his touch he quickly pulled away, fisting his hand in his pocket as he watched him critically for a moment. Squinting, Kai could barely make out the words that the other was saying- his speech seemed to be broken by his heavy breathing. People filed out of the locker room and his friends walked right on by without realizing he hadn’t left just yet. Lucky for them considering Lucas fell down like a rolled over sack of potatoes. For Kai, though, it happened in slow motion and there was nothing he could do about it. Dealing with this he sort of wish he’d been one of the people to leave so he didn’t have to deal with this. Then again he wasn’t entirely heartless.

Lowering his own backpack to the ground he crouched down beside him, squatting low on the floor. His arm itched to reach out and touch him, maybe reassure himself that Lucas was here and everything would be okay. He ignored the instinct though. He’d seen his fair share of panic attacks, hell he’d had a few himself. Therefore, he knew just how to deal with them, and it wasn’t by staring and waiting it out.

Distantly he heard what the other guy said, but he ignored it for the moment. It was hardly a matter of importance considering the state he was in. His eyes flickered upwards towards where he saw Lucas’ hand was reaching towards the locker to steady himself. This time he didn’t ignore his instinct as he reached for the hand, this time preparing himself to not give a single shit if he flinched away. His grip was steady as his other hand went to the other’s back, rubbing up and down slowly. Kai assured himself he’d do it for anyone else too before he began talking.

“Lucas just breath. Everything’s going to be okay.” Kai said, his voice loud in the empty locker room. All of the words he said after that were some reiteration of what to say when someone’s having a panic attack pamphlet, that he’d read out of pure boredom on his visit to the doctor’s office. When none of it seemed to be working he looked down at the floor before continuing. “Here, breath with me?” He would’ve considered it a direct order, but it came out as a question, of course. Following this he inhaled sharply, loud enough to be heard before exhaling. “One.” He inhaled again while keeping his eyes glued directly on the floor.

message 27: by ☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ (last edited Mar 04, 2019 01:19PM) (new)

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Alec flinched slightly when touched but didn't try and pull away. It may not have helped much but the feeling was sort of comforting, even if it was from him. He heard the words but he couldn't focus on them, their meaning just not sticking in his head. They weren't even words anymore just sounds. It wasn't until Kai suggested breathing with him that he felt anything changing. It wasn't so much the words that got him but the sound of Kai's breathing. In and out in and out, over and over again. He was finally able to just focus in on something and it helped.

Almost ten minutes passed before any real change was noticeable, before his breathing was more controlled. "I'm sorry you had to do this" he muttered after a long moment. Though he was feeling a lot better physically, emotionally he was still a wreck. "And I'm sorry I lied...... I just didn't want her.... or by extension the whole school to know the truth" he shook his head a bit as he slowly moved to sit back against the lockers. His hands were still shaking and his breathing still wasn't quite right, but the worst of it was over. "Just sorry in general........ I suck" he said with a heavy sigh a he lightly banged his head against the lockers behind him.

message 28: by Morgan (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments Somewhere along the way Kai lost count and his hand slipped from Lucas’ back when he finally felt that he was beginning to stop shaking and he heard his breathing becoming less labored. Carefully he listened before suddenly dropping the other’s hand and getting to his feet, his knees popping slightly from being crouched in that position for longer than he’d anticipated. Instead of muttering that it was fine and he’d do it for anyone who was going through it he just brushed off his pants a bit and nodded his head. When the other banged his head against the locker Kai couldn’t help but to let out a snort at his declaration. “That’s an accurate conclusion.”

He was still at a point where he was unable to process the lying part. Either way things between them were never going to be like they used to and it would be for the better if he was just to leave now. Reaching for his discarded bag on the ground he slung it over his shoulders before taking a slight step backwards. “Do you think you’re alright to go to class now? Or should I get the nurse? A teacher?” At one point he would’ve been with Lucas every step of the way, making sure he was stable enough to walk and everything else, but right now he looked to be in fine enough shape and in no need of further assistance.

message 29: by ☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ (last edited Mar 04, 2019 01:23PM) (new)

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments "I'm fine..... don't worry about it..... You've wasted enough of your time" Lucas said with small and kind of forced smile. "But hey, just so you know I really had tried contacting you. Wanted someone to really know where I was, never exactly went as planned though" he said with a heavy sigh. He wanted to tell Kai everything, but it wasn't hard to tell now wasn't the right time. He wasn't sure if there would ever actually be a right time things, between them seemed pretty irreparable. Though he hadn't been planning on them ever being in a relationship again, he had kind of hoped they could still be on talking terms.

Lucas slowly pushed himself back up onto his feet, not wanting to take things to quickly "I know you don't wanna hear it, I just don't want things to be awkward anymore." he said with a small shrug, not really sure what else to say. "I'll just uh..... stop talking now, you can go. I'm fine" he said and nodded slightly. Though he wasn't entirely out of the woods he was doing a lot better then he had been. Now he was just back to the state he's been in basically all day, so it wasn't to big of a deal. Or at least not as big as it could have been. Either way he was fine and definitely didn't want anyone else involved. It was bad enough Kai knew about his panic attacks, he really didn't want it spread around.

message 30: by Morgan (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments Kai was about to claim it wasn't a waste of time to help out a fellow student, but he knew it would be a waste of breath to say so out loud. "To really know where you were?" Now there wasn't a question he hadn't meant to ask. Alas, no matter how much he pressed his lips together to keep himself from talking he couldn't help but to let the question slip. It seemed lie Lucas wanted to tell him anyways, and he'd be in an absolute state of denial if he said he wasn't at least curious. Yesterday he'd wanted answers and been sorely disappointed by the outcomes of his prodding. Now he was more hesitant, but he couldn't help but to be more hopeful. Perhaps the other hadn't actually fallen in love with some girl while he was away? Before he could get too optimistic about that or their possible future he talked himself down. Either way Lucas had lied and seemed to have clear intentions of keeping away from Kai- so a future with them together definitely wasn't in the books.

Momentarily he leaned back against one of the lockers as he waited for the other to respond. Even with the dismissal he stayed where he was. Things were going to be awkward no matter what the circumstances. His boyfriend had disappeared without notice a year ago and now he was back. Sure, a lot of stuff had changed but it didn't change the fact that Kai was desperate to know the truth. What they had was fine and he knew it couldn't be his fault, but the weeks and months of radio silence ate away at him.

message 31: by ☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ (last edited Mar 04, 2019 01:28PM) (new)

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Lucas was a bit shocked that Kai hadn't just dismissed him again, it was kind of what he deserved. That and probably more if he was being honest. "Oh well, I" he said a bit awkwardly as he let out a heavy sigh trying to get a hold of himself enough to actually get this out. "Well I mean what I said about my parents not like us being together was true, and they did send me away. Just uh... not to my grandparents house" he said and shifted a bit uncomfortably before continuing. "They sent me to this clinic, where I guess the idea is to talk the gay away. Least that's what I hope my parents thought would happen. That thought is the only thing allowing me to actually maintain any kind of relationship with them." he said a small shudder traveling though his body as memories started flashing through his mind.

"I mean I don't really want to talk about my experience but I did try calling you. Three times actually" Lucas said with a small smile, though the expression quickly faded into a slight frown as the memories rushed back. "The first time was about three months in, at least that was my calculations couldn't really tell. I had been able to pick the lock in my room using a..... well it doesn't matter what, but I was able to gain access to a landline. I so excited to call you, to hear your voice after so long but before you could answer I was caught and dragged back to my room. I won't go into details, because honestly it's not something I like to think about let alone talk about, but there was a reason it was another two months before I was able to try calling you again. That time you answered, god it was so nice to hear your voice. You sounded kind of drunk but it didn't matter it was still you, but before I could actually say anything I was caught again, and was dragged back to my room for another punishment"

"Anyway my point is you were one of the only things keeping me going in that place, but eventually I just couldn't take it anymore, and I kind of gave in. Then not long after that I just started believing what they had to say" The last part wasn't exactly the full truth, the real story is a lot darker then that, but Kai didn't need to know about that. No one did, which was also why he left out his third attempt at trying to call him. "I'm sorry I lied, but you can understand why I didn't want to talk about it in front of her right? I really don't want this stuff to get out, ya know."

message 32: by Morgan (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments An uncomfortable silence seemed to be settling around them and he couldn't help but to wonder if he was actually going to get an answer or if it was just some on the spot shit Lucas was making up on the spot so they'd never have to talk to each other again. Right as he was about to give up entirely the other man spoke and he shuffled on his feet for a bit, entertaining himself with the loose thread at the end of his shirt as he listened patiently. Already his hand had balled into a fist as the other mentioned some bullshit about a pray the gay away sort of place. Or correctional facility. Whatever they called that sort of garbage. At first he was inclined not to believe him. He'd only met the Lawson's on a few occasions and he couldn't imagine them being that harsh. Sure they were avid members of the church, but in this town who wasn't? Aside from his father of course the whole lot of them were bible. Thumpers. Kai could easily fill up an entire notebook of the list of friends and their families who had tried roping him into going to church. When he was younger he had been into the idea of such a community. Needless to say he sort of fell away from it when his father's alcoholism became worse and everything else sort of fell apart with that. Despite the seriousness of the situation Kai couldn't help but to let out a snort. Anyone who wanted to change something that was so fundamental to who another person was clearly didn't care about sustaining a relationship. Still he did his best not to interject. Maybe Lucas was even happy living with such a deluded idea, and he wouldn't want to ruin that even with all that he had just witnessed just moments ago.

As he mentioned attempting to call he looked upwards for a brief period before his eyes fell back to the floor at the appearance of a slight smile. He didn't need to see that right now. His eyebrows knitted together slightly as an uncertain feeling washed over him. Yeah, the people probably were trying to keep him from contacting Kai- the person he'd been sinning with- but it seemed a little extreme that they would keep their phones locked up so carefully. When Lucas recalled the times he'd dialed Kai's number he did his best not to blame himself. Really, he couldn't remember the second time at all considering, from the little evidence there was, that he was shitfaced. The memory he had any recollection of though was that one mysterious phone call from an unknown number. He'd been hungover and barely recognizable as himself. That day when his phone did go off so did he. That had been the one time he pressed decline before throwing the piece of shit against the wall. It was also the reason for his currently shattered screen. It wasn't his fault though, Lucas had been taken away anyways. Kai could tell himself that over and over, but it still felt like a punch to the gut when he talked about receiving a punishment. The word in of itself held a darker tone and he didn't want to get into that.

At the end he shook his head. How could they really break someone like that. Not just Lucas, but anyone? Were they proud of themselves for it? They had to be, especially considering his ex was probably a success story for them. Rolling his shoulders back a bit to loosen them up he pushed himself away from the lockers. "Of course." Kai's reply was hoarse and he quickly cleared his throat. With all that had been said it was still odd to him that the other could even talk to him. Wasn't there some type of aversion therapy for that shit? Maybe that's why the panic attack happened? He couldn't really answer that for himself and he didn't really want to pry in any deeper as it would only lead to another round of internal questions. "Thanks for telling me though, but I guess it's all good now since it worked." Kai finished, trying not to spit out the words too harshly.

message 33: by ☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ (last edited Mar 04, 2019 01:35PM) (new)

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Lucas shuddered at the slight harshness of his tone, "I didn't want it to work, planned on holding out till I was eighteen, couldn't legally keep me then least I hoped they couldn't. Made it eight months, just couldn't do it anymore............ couldn't go back to the room........ not again" he said his face kind go glossing over, as if his mind was wondering off somewhere else, somewhere not great. After a long pause he shook his head a bit violently, "Anyway, it doesn't matter you're right, kind of sold out" he said and flashed a kind of awkward sad smile. "Anyway........ I'll uh see you around" he said and quickly gathered his things and rushed out of the room. Though it really wasn't to get away from Kai, it was just to get out of that locker room. He had started to feel the panic attack to start up again, started feeling the walls start to close in around him again and just really had to get out of there.

Lucas didn't bother going to talk to the coach, since he really didn't want to try and explain what had happened. Instead he went to his locker and quickly grabbed all his stuff before leaving the building and heading to his car. Leaving was probably the best thing for him to do right now, he just really needed to get away and calm down. He's been on edge since he pulled up to this god forsaken place and he just needed some peace. Just a little bit of peace. He was just about to pull out of the parking lot when he saw Joe, one of the lowlife druggies that go to the school. Lucas would usually just ignore such an individual but right now for some reason he paused.

Lucas stared at Joe for the longest time as he walked across the parking lot, probably skipping out on his last class as well. A few things that he's never thought about crossed his mind as he watched him. Thinking maybe he could solve a few of his problems, just maybe. No, I can't do that, would just make things worse. he quickly thought to himself before pulling out onto the street, trying to avoid drifting his gaze back to Joe.

message 34: by Morgan (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments With the sudden dismissal Kai nodded his head and managed to keep himself rooted in one spot until the dark haired boy left. A number of different questions continued to make a mess of his brain, but he kept himself quiet. Eventually after he left Kai made his way towards the exit in the locker room that led directly out onto the soccer field. Spotting a stray soccer ball that had been left behind he kicked it swiftly as he let out a loud string of curse words- all directed towards the Lawson's and whoever the hell else was out there who was listening. Pressing his fingers to his forehead he massaged his temples lightly as he tried not to dwell on it. The task wasn't so simple considering just yesterday he'd had some stupid story thrown his way and now there was this. Kai wished Lucas was lying more than anything else. It was one thing to experiment with someone for a year and then decide - ok, maybe this isn't for me, but it hadn't been Lucas' choice. Keeping himself from going down that road he made the silent decision that if the other guy ever needed him he'd at least be his friend. Heck, maybe this was even his chance to straighten up his own act.

Making his way towards the bleachers that were shrouded in sunlight he laid himself out on the top row. Being in the midst of autumn Kai was sure there wouldn't be too many more days like this. In fact it was best he soaked up this sun right now before he had to bundle himself up in too many layers and coats. He thrummed his fingers against his chest as he tried to think about anything other than what had just happened. Needless to say it was a difficult task. Somehow he managed though after a few swigs from his flask and the blaring of some random music from a playlist on his phone. Every now and again his fingers would stray towards his keys as he debated taking off. Considering he didn't have class it was rather tempting to leave Vanessa here and just go anywhere else but here. Kai was a good enough friend, though, not to abandon her. With all of her gossiping tendencies and other crap she had at least stuck with him over the last year, and helped him piece himself together enough to get a job after weeks of binge drinking. It was even better that she managed to fill in the silence that never seemed to leave. Skipping a few songs he began to think about the night shift he had to pull, and about having to return home to get his uniform. The task of returning to that hellhole wasn't something he was looking forward to, but if he was lucky his father would be passed out in his own pile of vomit and barely register his presence.

message 35: by ☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ (last edited Jun 29, 2017 04:00PM) (new)

☽❣≾KraFish≿❣☾ | 3769 comments Lucas pulled up to the curb in front of his house and paused a moment, not wanting to go inside to face his parents questions yet. They never stopped questioning him, he just really couldn't take it anymore. It he was being honest he could probably use a break from both school and home. Being back was nothing like he thought it would be, like he dreamed it would be for those first eight months that he was in treatment. Thinking back to before treatment, or even at the start of treatment, when he had some semi-balance of sanity was almost relaxing. Before treatment everything was perfect, he just wished it could have stayed that way. That he'd just stayed in the closet for just a few more years.

Lucas grabbed his bag out of the backseat before heading inside, once again heading straight up to his room. At the moment he couldn't even stand to look at his parents so he moved as quickly and as quietly as he possibly could.

Once behind his locked door Lucas relaxed a bit and decided to just work on some homework, since he hadn't been able to concentrate on anything in school. He tried working it for well over an hour, but his mind just kept drifting back to Kai. He kept finding himself glancing over at his closet, a spot he's kind of been avoiding ever since he'd returned home. Before he was sent away he found everything that reminded him of Kai and put it in a shoe box. He hide the box in his closest so his parents couldn't find it and throw it all away while he was gone. He'd always planned on coming back and just going right back to him but things had changed. He hated it but they did.

Lucas eventually gave up on his homework and just gave into temptation. He hurried over to his closet and dug through it for a moment before finding what he was looking for. He slide back on the floor to sit in front of his closed door, not wanting to be caught with it by his mom or dad. He didn't open it right away though, to afraid of all the memories it might bring back. "God I'm such an idiot. I shouldn't be doing this" he mumbled to himself before flipping the box of his lap and onto the floor, having decided to not open it after all. Unfortunately the action caused everything to scatter across the floor. "Fuck" he grumbled before moving to clean it up.

Lucas' grumbling quickly stopped though as his eyes scanned over the photos he was picking up. Him and Kai kissing, others of them just sitting close attempting more selfies. There were so many happy memories in this box. He paused though when he came across it, a bracelet. There was nothing special about it, just a cheap whole thing but it was probably the best thing in the box. "Oh Jesus" he chuckled before picking it up and sitting back against the door. He stared at the bracelet for the longest time moving his fingers over the plastic beads for what seemed like just minutes but could have been well over an hour.

message 36: by Morgan (new)

Morgan | 1554 comments (view spoiler)

Eventually the last bell of dismissal rang through the courtyard and the girl found him exactly where he had been resting on the soccer field for almost the entire last hour. Kai flicked out his cigarette before tossing it to the side and forcing himself back to his feet. On the walk back to his car he refrained from saying much even as Vanessa asked him about his day. All he wanted to do was be a sarcastic shit and say oh, it was splendid, but he managed to keep his mouth closed all the way up until she was buckled in his passenger seat. Maybe for her it seemed to be just the perfect time to mention the person he wanted to talk about least of all. At first her questions were innocent as she asked him whether or not he knew about the other man's return, but it wasn't soon before she began prodding even deeper into more inquisitive questions that required more than a yes or no head shake, It wasn't all too long before she told her to drop it and they fell into a far more comforting silence as she hooked her phone up to the aux cord and scrolled through a number of different songs before finally managing to settle on one. At least she only lived a few blocks from school so he didn't have to deal with listening to Justin Bieber's, Despacito for too long. Dropping her off he prepared himself for the longer ride home and having to deal with his father if he was even somewhat conscious.

When he walked through the front door his original assumptions had been true and he let out an overdue sigh as he saw his father passed out on the floor. Trudging past him he paused briefly and nudged him with the toe of his boots before shaking his head at the pathetic excuse that was supposed to be his dad. He managed to continue forward and into his room. Taking a look at the mess he analyzed where exactly he would've left his spare uniform before rooting through his drawers. After finding them he settled down onto his bed for only a short time he headed off onto his job. The one he had more hours for was the local diner- the locals tipped well enough and he certainly made more income during those hours. The other job he kept up with was his one at the movie theater. It was a small place and didn't hold more than a few new movies at a time, but it was frequented by a lot of people from school, especially on the weekends. Unfortunately that was the place he had to be tonight. Just before leaving he scraped together the little warmth in his heart to help the deadbeat on the floor up into one of the reclining chairs before he took off.

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