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Mabel's Adventures
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Free new kid's book. Please leave a review.

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message 1: by Lia (new)

Lia Tern | 2 comments Hi everyone,

My new children's book is available for free on amazon for the next few days. Please don't forget to leave a review and let me know what you think. Have a great weekend and week ahead. https://www.amazon.com/Mabels-adventu...


message 2: by Jina (new)

Jina Gibbs Dear Lia,
I downloaded and read your children's book, Mabel's Adventures. As far as " the bones" of your book (sentence structure, puncuation etc.) I found only one spelling error, bagan should've been began on the page where the crab makes it's first appearance. Also as far as your storyline goes, its a good lesson to learn but I can't promote a book where the child defies the Moms rule and sneaks around behind her Moms back to skip school. You never "taught" the lesson to mind your parents or that it's bad to lie or how dangerous it is to not be where you are supposed to be. You chose a talking crab to "scare" her into going to school. I felt it ended too fast and didn't address being held accountable for lying or not doing as she was told. It ended without the Mom finding out that she had skipped school. I wish you luck in the future telling your stories but I can't promote this one and won't write a review since I would give a 2 star rating. I would rate it that due to the beautiful illustrations and your point of a child needing an education.
Sincerely,
Jina Gibbs
Ps I am sorry if I hurt any feelings or if you felt I was too harsh but I am being totally honest with you in the hope you may go back and rewrite the story better.


message 3: by Lia (new)

Lia Tern | 2 comments Hi Jina,

Thanks for your feedback. I appreciate it. And no you did not hurt my feelings at all. It's refreshing to get constructive criticism and that's exactly what I wanted, to see the views other people have about it. I agree with some of your points too. However for a kid, I think I wanted them to know that sometimes we can learn lessons by the things around us, or from the situations we find ourselves in. I know for a fact that as a kid, I did some really naughty things but learned my lessons via other avenues. I did not want to perpetuate the idea that it's only bad if your parents find out. I think sometimes we just learn from our mistakes. I have noted the point about it ending too fast and other valuable things you've pointed out. I completely understand not promoting something you don't agree with and I think that's fair enough. Have a blessed and good weekend.

Lia


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