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Authors Seeking FREE Betas > Group of betas for YA/NA FANTASY (no dwarfs or elves)

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message 1: by E.M (last edited Jul 27, 2016 12:18AM) (new)

E.M Redshaw (emredshaw) | 3 comments Hi! I’m writing a high fantasy novel for all ages (the characters are 16-50 years old). What I need help with is plot holes and opinions on characters and events.
Here is my “blurb”. I hope you’re interested!

The world is shaking, crying, burning. Death will come to those who don’t prepare to fight.

Before her birth, the king ordered every Aruel to be captured and killed. Every time Emery thinks she is safe, she has to escape again. But then she meets Ayess, a little girl who sees straight through her, and everything changes. Ayess is not made for escaping. If Emery wants to run, she has to leave her behind.

Her decision gets a whole new meaning when a group of her own kind gather their forces against the king. If she stays, she will be crushed, but if she runs, she’ll be a traitor.

Emery has to figure out whether or not her worst fate is death, before the earth takes its last labored breath.

(This story also follows a soldier and a princess, whose separate story-lines and battles strongly affect Emery's, but I haven't yet figured out how to include them in the blurb, haha.)

my e-mail: author.e.m.redshaw@gmail.com (or reply to this post)

I look forward to hearing from you! :)


message 2: by Zero (new)

Zero (jl_sanchez) | 75 comments Wow, the blurb really got my attention. I would love to help if you are okay with a 3 - 4 day return period for a 3 chapter review.


message 3: by Martin (new)

Martin Rinehart Good blurb, E.M.

Major: don't fix what ain't broke. Don't add more plot/characters. It's a blurb, not a synopsis.

Minor: Maybe give the king a name? Add should that be "her worse fate"?


message 4: by E.M (new)

E.M Redshaw (emredshaw) | 3 comments Martin wrote: "Good blurb, E.M.

Major: don't fix what ain't broke. Don't add more plot/characters. It's a blurb, not a synopsis.

Minor: Maybe give the king a name? Add should that be "her worse fate"?"


Thanks for the advice, Martin! I really appreciate it.


message 5: by E.M (new)

E.M Redshaw (emredshaw) | 3 comments Zero wrote: "Wow, the blurb really got my attention. I would love to help if you are okay with a 3 - 4 day return period for a 3 chapter review."

That would be great! You can send me an email with some information about yourself (age and occupation for example) and I'll send you some chapters. Thank you :)


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