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Support Chat > Anxiety and the news

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message 1: by Marina (last edited Jul 15, 2016 12:55AM) (new)

Marina (sonnenbarke) Sadly, there has been a lot of terrorist attacks lately, as we all know. The news is obviously full of it and sometimes the details are very graphic, with many terrible photos, too. Luckily I don't own a TV, but I read online newspapers and they can be just as bad. Of course we need to know about what's going on exactly, but I feel this has a huge impact on anxious people. For instance, I've planned this trip to Edinburgh just yesterday morning, and I'm extremely anxious that something might be happening, what with the city being full of people on the occasion of the festival.

How do you all cope with this? Especially people out there suffering from anxiety? I've always suffered from anxiety, but lately it's been quite bad and more generalized than ususal.

I don't know if any of you ever heard of Debbie Corso, she's a recovered borderline, very famous in the BPD community. She's a great inspiration for many of us. She's just written this post on Facebook: I find it very helpful and encourage you all to read it, even though you don't have BPD, it's very important for all people suffering from anxiety of any kind and high sensitivity, as well as for many other people who are deeply affected by the news.

message 2: by Martha (new)

Martha (marthais) Hey Marina,

I know exactly how you feel, it's starting to feel like the terrorist attacks are everywhere all the time. My boyfriend's taking me to Paris for my birthday in a couple of weeks, so yesterday's attack in Nice did concern me.

I can't say "don't worry about it" - a) because that's the worst thing to say to people like us and b) because it doesn't work. However, the only way I've learned to deal with it is to try to accept what is in and out of my control. Unfortunately these things are completely outside of our control - no matter how many things we avoid doing, we could still get caught up in something awful like this.

I live in London, and everyday I think I could get on the tube and it could explode. When I'm in a calmer frame of mind, I say to myself "yes it could explode. So either I'll be injured or I'll die. If I die, I won't be around to worry about it! If I'm injured, then I'll have to deal with it. People get injured everyday and they make it work".

It doesn't completely rid me of any worry, but when I have avoided doing things because of anxiety, I've usually regretted it later. So if I didn't go to Paris, I would massively regret it - my boyfriend has planned this lovely trip, and I've been so excited about it!

With the Edinburgh festival, you're right that it will be full of people so it could be a target. However, it's not such a big event on a global scale. While Edinburgh is the capital of Scotland, Scotland must be a relatively low priority. An attack there would cause damage and claim lives, but it wouldn't make such a statement - it's not the capital of the UK, or any kind of political epicentre. Of course, Nice is not a capital, but then it was Bastille Day, so arguably it was more about that day rather than which French city (plus they already attacked Paris this year so perhaps there it would have been harder to reach a second time).

I know that with anxiety, logic goes out the window. However, I've found that trying to introduce logic back in can sometimes help. None of us can guarantee that Edinburgh will be completely safe, but no where is completely safe.

I also find that when I'm worrying about something so huge, it helps to minimise the everyday things I could be anxious about. I always get stressed at airports, so I arrive really early (2.5 hrs usually), go and get myself a nice breakfast and coffee, read my book and get to the gate in plenty of time to be on the plane. I plan how to get from the airport to my accommodation (rather than my boyf's approach of "ah there'll be a train or something"). I might buy a ticket for a bus tour that will double as transport so I don't need to worry about negotiating local transport that can be confusing. Stuff like that - if I know I've got the small things sorted, then I just have to work on accepting the big things.

At the end of the day, I think it'd be better to die in Paris, having an amazing time than holed up in my flat scared of what might happen!

Sorry that's a bit of a ramble, I hope it helps a bit!

message 3: by Marina (new)

Marina (sonnenbarke) Thanks, Martha. I believe the terrorists' aim is actually to scare us so much that we end up not doing things we would like doing. That's just what they want, for us to live in a constant state of fear.

Obviously this fear is kind of irrational, as we could die or be injured in lots of other ways that are actually more likely, as in a domestic accident or whatever else. For instance, a couple days ago there's been a massive train accident in Southern Italy with lots of deaths and injured people, and it wasn't a terrorist attack at all. Now I wouldn't avoid taking trains. Anxiety is always irrational.

I'll try to keep in mind what you say, I can't avoid living my life just because of fear and anxiety.

message 4: by Martha (new)

Martha (marthais) Hey Marina, have you been to Edinburgh yet? Or is that coming up?

message 5: by Marina (new)

Marina (sonnenbarke) Not yet, I'm going next Saturday. I'm so excited, but also anxious!

What about you, how did you like your trip to Paris? Was it your first time there? I went there twice, the second time visiting a friend who was living there, so I had a bit of an "insider view" of the city. I must asmit it's not really my favorite city in the world, though. Obviously it's beautiful, just not the best, IMHO.

message 6: by Martha (new)

Martha (marthais) Ooh exciting! My work mate is there the same time as you I think.

Paris was gorgeous! It was my third time and I still love it :) we did a lot more walking this time round, so I really appreciated it. We didn't do too much sightseeing which was just what I wanted - plenty of time sitting in parks reading books and stuffing our faces with macarons :D

message 7: by Marina (new)

Marina (sonnenbarke) That sounds good, Martha! I think sightseeing is fine the first time you visit a place, afterwards (especially the third time around!) walking etc. is very nice. I think that's probably what I'm going to do in Edinburgh, apart from going to the Fringe of course. I was there four years ago and did most of the sightseeing that time. I really love the city :-)

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