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Archived Author Help > Would you be offended?

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message 1: by Shannon (new)

Shannon Reber | 181 comments So I've been an author for a year, a writer for my lifetime. I publish under my maiden name, which is listed on my cover photo along with all my books on all my social media sites. Along with the fact I post frequently with links to my books etc. So it should be easy, if you're interested, to find my stuff.

I just got a message from a woman I've known most of my life, who is in the process of publishing a children's book. I suggested self-publishing, but she chose the traditional route. So her message was saying that her publisher won't even consider publishing her unless she has 1000 likes on her FB page and she wants me to ask my people to like her page, but she gives this long speech she wants me to copy and paste. (Way too wordy and irritating, IMO)

So she starts the message out with, your support means the world to me, would you please send me a link to your books, because I'd love to read one. She started out with that, then went into the sales pitch. Now, I'm an indie author, obviously. I just posted the link to the Hash's Bash on all my pages etc, where if she had ACTUAL interest in my work, she could've gotten my books for free. I also have the link to my newest book pinned to the top of my author page.

Is it unreasonable of me to be offended by her? I know I should be supportive, but it irritated me. Should I just suck it up and be the better person, post her link and all, or ignore her since she's really just pretending interest in my work so I'll help her??


message 2: by Dwayne, Head of Lettuce (new)

Dwayne Fry | 4353 comments Mod
Ugh. Another reason to be glad I didn't go the traditional route. Can you imagine having to solicit for a thousand likes on Facebook just to get your book considered for publication? Seems pretty stupid to me, since most of these "likes" she's probably going to gather will come from strangers just doing a good deed.

I guess if I were in your shoes, it would come down to how much I care about his person and how much I believed in their work. As for being offended, we probably all know people who want our support for this and that but won't give us theirs. It's tacky, but I don't find it that offensive.


Tara Woods Turner Her behavior feels self-serving and insincere. I would gently explain to her that I would be happy to support her efforts but blasting my fb followers with unsolicited promos wouldn't help either one of us.

Offer to
A) introduce her to your fb followers in your own way and in your own discreet style
B) send her links to different author support sites and boards so she can learn the ropes and pick up useful tips just like the rest of us had to do in the beginning
C) offer her a promo download of one of your books to show there's no hard feelings


message 4: by Shannon (new)

Shannon Reber | 181 comments Was thinking about just posting the link, cutting her speech out entirely. That is only one of the reasons why I think self-publishing is the only way. Thanks for your advice!


message 5: by P.D. (new)

P.D. Workman (pdworkman) If you want to send people to her, then do. Use whatever message you like. If you want to suggest some kind of joint or reciprocal promo, then let her know.

If you don't want to, then don't.

I wouldn't be offended, but I wouldn't feel obligated.


message 6: by Riley, Viking Extraordinaire (new)

Riley Amos Westbrook (sonshinegreene) | 1510 comments Mod
I'd support her, and then tell her to prepare for the realities of being an author, indie or trad. More and more publishers are asking for authors to market and strategize. It's up to her if she wants part of her royalties going to a publisher.

Btw, that may seen anti-trad publishing, but it's not. A publisher can/will help with a lot(and I have used one), but she's still going to end up doing a lot of marketing


message 7: by Christina (new)

Christina McMullen (cmcmullen) Well... yes, I would be offended. But then, I'd also be skeptical and ask her to examine this 'traditional' publisher a little more because I have never heard of a FB like quota. Granted, last time I had any dealings with even a small press publisher, the hamster dance was a popular website, but it still sounds fishy.


message 8: by Shannon (new)

Shannon Reber | 181 comments I did it. I didn't post her speech, but just a little blurb of my own. I'm still offended simply because I don't give a crap about insincere purchases, 'I'll buy your book if you promote mine.' Maybe I'm easily offended. 8-) But whatever. I did it. Look at me, being all nice and junk. 8-)


message 9: by Joe (new)

Joe Jackson (shoelessauthor) Tell her that if she has over 1000 facebook likes, she probably doesn't need a traditional publisher. Ask her if the publisher is "Cart Before the Horse Press."


message 10: by Shannon (new)

Shannon Reber | 181 comments Christina wrote: "Well... yes, I would be offended. But then, I'd also be skeptical and ask her to examine this 'traditional' publisher a little more because I have never heard of a FB like quota. Granted, last time..."

So glad I'm not alone in the offended dept! And I consider all publishers fishy, so not planning on opening a conversation with her. Have no interest in talking to her anymore. *Shrugs.*


message 11: by Shannon (new)

Shannon Reber | 181 comments V.M. wrote: "Shannon wrote: "Christina wrote: "Well... yes, I would be offended. But then, I'd also be skeptical and ask her to examine this 'traditional' publisher a little more because I have never heard of a..."

LOL, point her in this direction after I delete this thread? !-)


message 12: by Shannon (new)

Shannon Reber | 181 comments Joe wrote: "Tell her that if she has over 1000 facebook likes, she probably doesn't need a traditional publisher. Ask her if the publisher is "Cart Before the Horse Press.""

*Snorts out a laugh.* Something like that. It's a children's book that she's going to a Christian publisher for. VERY small market, IMO.


message 13: by G.G. (new)

G.G. (ggatcheson) | 2491 comments Honestly, I don't know if I would be offended or not, but I also probably would not do it. I think it is rude to ask such a request, especially when you don't know the author personally.

I bug people enough with books I believe in, without bugging them with everything that comes by just because a total stranger asked. Honestly, the more you bug your fans, the less they feel inclined to read your posts. Is it worth the risk?


message 14: by Shannon (new)

Shannon Reber | 181 comments G.G. wrote: "Honestly, I don't know if I would be offended or not, but I also probably would not do it. I think it is rude to ask such a request, especially when you don't know the author personally.

I bug peo..."


I DO know her, which is what offends me most. I would have done it happily if she hadn't put the fake, 'Would you send me the link to your books, I'm so interested in your books.' I do not mind helping other authors at all, but feigning interest when my links are available everywhere if she was genuinely interested, just because she felt she had to do that just to get me to help her...I should probably let this go, since I already helped her. 8-)


message 15: by G.G. (new)

G.G. (ggatcheson) | 2491 comments Yikes... sorry, I read too fast and missed the 'known all my life'. Then yes, I'd be offended. Not because she asked but for the same reason you stated. It almost sounds like bribing lol
In your case, I think I'd still have helped her but I would have had to tell her that I don't accept bribes and that she didn't have to pretend to be interested in my books. :P (Nah, I don't think I would have been able to say that but I would have sure thought it. hehe)

You've done a good thing helping her then. Try to get over it...until she asks you to read and review her book. /ducks


message 16: by Joe (new)

Joe Jackson (shoelessauthor) Shannon wrote: "It's a children's book that she's going to a Christian publisher for. VERY small market, IMO."

Hmm, not to sidetrack or hijack the thread, but though Christian books are a small market, they're pretty loyal and rabid for content for that very reason.

Carry on. Yes, I would be offended, and mostly because of the fake interest lines.


message 17: by Grace (new)

Grace Crandall | 79 comments I would be extremely offended. That kind of message doesn't really even merit a reply. Asking you to promote her sight unseen is bad enough, but asking you to do it with a copy-and-paste version of her words (not yours!!) is just plain rude.


message 18: by Annie (last edited Jul 05, 2016 12:09PM) (new)

Annie Arcane (anniearcane) | 629 comments @ Miss Shannon

Hmm. I think it's simply human nature to want something for nothing or a handout, if ya know what I mean? Not to say that people are malicious or anything because I don't imagine that most are at all! I just reckon that very few people are willing to give before they receive, ya know? So just that you're even considering it is quite sweet of you because you owe her zippo, imho :)

Truth be told, I had a number of authors (outside of SIA) reach out during the event this weekend and ask me to promote for them. None of them had ever PMed me prior. Was I significantly "offended"? Nah, it's cool beans. But I'll admit I was a sorta taken aback by the first email. With that being said, after the 3rd one rolled in, I thought, "Huh, it's just people being people, Ann. No biggie." I replied to every request (cuz I can never ignore ppl haha) and politely declined.

As for being the bigger person, ugh, I might ruffle some feathers with this one, but...

I'm not entirely convinced that helping her actually makes you a bigger person. What I mean is, not helping her doesn't make you a smaller person either. And it *cough* enables bad behavior *cough*

I love (seriously, LOVE!!) helping people but there are only so many hours in a day, ya know? Personally, I've found that if I'm not selective then 1) I get taken advantage of and 2) I totally burn out. While I am 100% committed to backing fellow indies, my efforts will always go to those who pay it forward. Because then the community benefits as a whole. Just my 2 cents.

*slowly backs away from ledge*

So, yep. You're very kind. She's lucky that you helped her. Hope she realizes that.

Hugs,
Ann

P.S. - Wow. I think that was my most serious-sounding post ever! Sorry, Miss Shannon!! haha.


message 19: by P.D. (new)

P.D. Workman (pdworkman) I hate to say it, but part of the issue may revolve around the Christian fiction genre as well. I find that folks who are of my religion, which will remain unnamed, tend to think of themselves as a family or brotherhood and that because we're all part of this family, we should give each other goods and services for free, or at least at a significant discount. And we should feel free to ask each other for whatever we think we deserve. Because we're family, you know? We all have to stick together. And no one should be offended by a brother or sister asking you for something, you should be happy to give it.

Hmm. I hope that comes across as good-humoured, and not as bitingly sarcastic as it sounds in my head when I read it back. The fact is, I do love my church brothers and sisters. And I help them out and help to refer their businesses and do what I can for them. But there is a line, and I won't support something I don't believe is a good product and I don't feel like I 'owe it' to any of them.

Nuff said, I hope.


message 20: by Teresa (new)

Teresa Smokes (smoksytess) | 5 comments P.D. wrote: "I hate to say it, but part of the issue may revolve around the Christian fiction genre as well. I find that folks who are of my religion, which will remain unnamed, tend to think of themselves as a..."

I could say you speak my mind P.D. The people of my religion also does that and what I find to be extremely annoying is when you're told to 'never complain." Gosh, it's so annoying and the same goes for pretense.

If this woman is truly interested in other people's book then she would read Shannon's book, but it's like she's only looking for stepping stones to get her needs satisfied.

I won't be offended if it happens to me because I'm already accustomed to the psychology of how people operate. At least if you need help you must give something in exchange, something I offer to people who would help me with my book.

If you want to get more you gotta give more. Simple. End of story.

And no one should ever fake interest, 'cause sooner or later you get outed.


message 21: by Missy (new)

Missy Sheldrake (missysheldrake) | 252 comments I would have been hurt that she only showed interest in my work when she wanted something from me, and I probably would only have posted the link with a short blurb, like you did.

Some people are just selfish, and it's up to you to decide whether they're toxic to your well-being or not. :( It stinks.


message 22: by Christina (new)

Christina McMullen (cmcmullen) Annie wrote: "Truth be told, I had a number of authors (outside of SIA) reach out during the event this weekend and ask me to promote for them. None of them had ever PMed me prior. Was I significantly "offended"? Nah, it's cool beans. But I'll admit I was a sorta taken aback by the first email. With that being said, after the 3rd one rolled in, I thought, "Huh, it's just people being people, Ann. No biggie." I replied to every request (cuz I can never ignore ppl haha) and politely declined. "

I got offended for you, Annie. ;p


message 23: by Annie (new)

Annie Arcane (anniearcane) | 629 comments Christina wrote: "I got offended for you, Annie. ;p "

ROFLMAO, Miss Christina! You really did!! And I reeeally appreciated it!!! >_<

Hugs,
Ann

#alwaysworriedaboutpeoplesfeelings


message 24: by Martin (new)

Martin Wilsey | 447 comments I am offended by the initial demand. The only reason to sign with a traditional publisher is so they can handle the PR!


message 25: by Charles (new)

Charles Hash | 1054 comments Yep, sure would. But I might still help them, depends.


message 26: by Rachael (new)

Rachael Eyre (rachaeleyre) | 194 comments I think her demand is even more unreasonable if you actually know her. Such crassness would be forgivable (just about) in a stranger, but using your work to promote hers? Ugh.

And yes, I've never heard of this "1000 Facebook likes" thing either. Sounds iffy to say the least.


message 27: by Tina (new)

Tina McCright (tinamccright) | 14 comments It really isn't worth your energy to be offended. I would post a link and wish her well. Her intention was not to offend you.


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