1st Chapter YA Fantasy

[Maya]

Hi! I'm currently trying to decide between two versions of a first chapter. I'd love all the feedback I can get!

My novel is high fantasy, and the villain is the main character (although he doesn't start out that way). Each chapter version is around 2000 words.

PM me or reply below!

Thanks!
Maya

[Randall]

Send it my way at rdavis060@gmail.com and I'll have a look.

[Maya]

Thanks! I sent an email.

[Crystal]

Maya wrote: "Hi! I'm currently trying to decide between two versions of a first chapter. I'd love all the feedback I can get!

My novel is high fantasy, and the villain is the main character (although he doesn..."

Hi Maya,

I'd love to take a look at your chapters. Pm me if you're interested :)
Crystal

[Maya]

As it so happens, I've picked a version. Thanks to everyone who helped! :)