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critique corner > Ideas Wanted (critique of novel 2).

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message 1: by Dana (new)

Dana Miranda (unmoored) To begin with I don’t use any form of punctuation online except for periods and commas.

I would like to know if this idea is intriguing to some.

I’ve been writing a novel called Nostalgia based Trompe-l'œi, which is optical illusions in paintings and for my writing deals with the false illusion presented by the notion of the novel and of words. It’s written in the style of the 'stream of consciousness' detailing the life of a Russian man and his friends who in dealing with a society that is just as mad and confused as the people that compose of it. These changes of psyche as well as perceptions of people, society, and the mind are frequently shifted into by dream segments as well as the eccentric happenings, sometimes delving into the erotic of impotency and potency, that so often arise with living in the ‘Real’.

Through the process of memory and forgetting, as well as obsessions with objects, the characters inevitably fail to connect with life. Whether by the main character’s obsessions with dandelions, teeth, eyes, and words one sees the reality of life to be composed at his loveliest of obsessions and love, the greatest of which is self-love.

The narration is told through the ramblings of a man whose psychosis is so strong it pulls his closest friends into the mute lives of the citizens around him, these men being mere objects with only hope and security to cling onto. Here there are men in love with objects and the swiftness of motion attributed to their static; the inanimate still of our times leads to the literal love of stagnant decay and inertness, the literal obsessions of matter. Even women become debased as auto-icons, women who so frequently change appearance and personality that they transform into anything that will be desired, they are interchangeable and exchangeable.

It is in this confused society that the setting takes place, seemingly Russia and seemingly nowhere, a misshapen pattern of America stretched on a canvas of Russian cloth. There is nothing to cause so much confusion as the intermingling of cultures and generations.

Extract from Precept of Work: Rough-Draft
(What of light on a stream, if not a reflection, perhaps a brief impression? perhaps a fluidity of substance so embossed upon the mind that a fleeting, picturesque scene with the dynamics of a motion reel is overawed into being; in parable, the conscious mind, simply a torrent in which images pass uninterrupted, entrapped at times in eddies, only to break away again into st-reams? of this adaption and evolution of introverted thought materializes new modes of perceiving the suffusive (impressions) and with it the digesting of eternal becoming into the presence of eternal recurrence: in that of duration and flux, however I perceived a standstill and a distortion… for in nature the modern man has become just so hollow and ineffectual, he has proscribed a treatment towards his own imbalance without proper diagnosis; life thus became not the realization of flux indebted in all minds, but instead a fundamental novelty in suffering and in the assertions of the long past, of the constant static, purported by the stock-still, of the ancient thinkers (tinkers)… they who have ascertained that is it more rational to think than to feel? those that have pierced the air with the call to look at existence reasonably! but why reason? why not unreason? if this then is the mindset, or rather the philosophy, that man has ascertained for himself is not this mindset fundamentally estranged from life? if perceptions are based on countless impressions then what of conventions for practical purposes (truths), have they not limited potential? the bounded rationality of the concurrent and the bygone have sought through dissection the binding of all things into truths, yet what have these objective laws taught but to reject the way in which man perceives and understands: time as a relative mode of perception, the individual mind expresses changing’s moods, thoughts, and impulses, these memories tie us to the most distant of feelings.) End

The story is mostly about the hypocrisies of life and how one embraces them to feel 'Real', as well as the philosophical questions that arise and are sometimes unanswered.
As Tomaselli once stated, “Framed by artifice but motivated by the desire for the Real – has turned out to be the primary subject of my work”, and my work is the Synthetic Philosophy.
Criticism is appreciated greatly as well as thoughts or discussions. If you want to know more as well simply ask it of me.




message 2: by WL (new)

WL Robinson | 4 comments Hey Dana, its nice to meet you. Your idea is good. If it interests you, then go for it. But personally I dont find that interesting but I would read it when it is finished. Its a good idea. If I started something like that I would never finish it. What im more interested in is the Gods and Goddessess (is that how you spell goddessess?) of Olympus. I find them really interesting.


message 3: by Dana (last edited Jul 21, 2009 12:27PM) (new)

Dana Miranda (unmoored) well then we are both interested in the same things, since i was ten i have been interested in mythology, specifically greek, roman, japanese, and nordic gods & goddesses.

i use to carry around a dictionary of greek mythology, telling you the lives and details of every little known person. also, i've taken latin for seven years so it does interest me personally, however in writing about the gods it seems overdone unless adapted into modern times like ulysses and mourning becomes electra.


message 4: by WL (new)

WL Robinson | 4 comments well i guess we are interested in the same things. and you took latin? wow, ive always wanted to learn latin. thats cool. do speak it well? or better than well?


message 5: by Dana (new)

Dana Miranda (unmoored) well the thing about latin is that unless your a teacher of it speaking it is quite hard, well its not fluent. however, i do know how to translate english to latin and vice versa. but first and foremost mythology is my favorite subject.


message 6: by WL (new)

WL Robinson | 4 comments i like mythology too. do you speak any other languages? i dont. but when i get in high school i am taking spanish. from there im gonna try to learn french.


message 7: by Dana (new)

Dana Miranda (unmoored) well ik some of latin, and a language called portuguese creole. other than that though i want to learn french, japanese, russian, and german.


message 8: by WL (new)

WL Robinson | 4 comments i also want to learn german. i never heard of any language called portuguese creole. i can hardly even spell portuguese. i have to look were you typed it to know how to spell it.


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