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Poem of the Day > 108 Bloody Orkney - Captain Hamish Blair

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message 1: by Hilary (new)

Hilary | 2082 comments This bloody town's a bloody cuss
No bloody trains, no bloody bus,
And no one cares for bloody us
In bloody Orkney.

The bloody roads are bloody bad,
The bloody folks are bloody mad,
They'd make the brightest bloody sad,
In bloody Orkney.

All bloody clouds, and bloody rains,
No bloody kerbs, no bloody drains,
The Council's got no bloody brains,
In bloody Orkney.

Everything's so bloody dear,
A bloody bob, for bloody beer,
And is it good? - no bloody fear,
In bloody Orkney.

The bloody 'flicks' are bloody old,
The bloody seats are bloody cold,
You can't get in for bloody gold
In bloody Orkney.

The bloody dances make you smile,
The bloody band is bloody vile,
It only cramps your bloody style,
In bloody Orkney.

No bloody sport, no bloody games,
No bloody fun, the bloody dames
Won't even give their bloody names
In bloody Orkney.

Best bloody place is bloody bed,
With bloody ice on bloody head,
You might as well be bloody dead,
In bloody Orkney.


message 2: by Hilary (new)

Hilary | 2082 comments I heard this poem for the first time at my poetry group yesterday and laughed so much I had to share it with you. Apparently it was written by a sailor stationed at Scapa who obviously wasn't impressed! It was set to music and eventually attributed to Captain Blair. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. One of the people in the group who writes and has had poetry published told us it was technically brilliant - I just think its so funny.


message 3: by Lee (new)

Lee I love this - I guess there's only so much time you can spend admiring the beautiful scenery.


message 4: by Tracey (new)

Tracey | 304 comments Hah, that's really funny. I've never been to Orkney, but it's certainly reminiscent of some bits of Scotland I've been to, especially the reference to the weather!


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