A Concise Chinese-English Dictionary for Lovers
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Is the boyfriend an artist or a jerk?
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Although, I felt like the book fluctuated too drastically between her wanting her growing self-awareness of personal independence with her wanting to suffocate him with her all-consuming love.

I think he was a bit of a jerk, yes, but they were as bad as each other. She was smothering, and wouldn't contribute a penny, he seemed to use her for cleaning and sex. He didn't really take an interest in her as a person at all. Mid-book he shows a reluctance to even have any conversation with her!
I think a more interesting question would be: who was the victim or the villain?

I also think there is an intended irony in the fact Z's boyfriend was incredibly Zen-like. He wanted to float above everything, both emotions and the material world. Z went to England as a Chinese person embracing Capitalism, and found a lover going in the opposite direction.

This book/story is very truthful and close to realistic, which is why I enjoyed it very much.
The artist loved Z very much, but in a different way and approach. This can be seen in the last chapter of the book, from his last letter to her.
Sweet :)
I think it's interesting that he was really into her when she could hardly speak English, but gets really annoyed when she starts to be able to speak and show herself. He tells her again and again to stop talking. He comes across as a complex character, but there are many signs in the book that he only wanted this young woman when she was a tiny, quiet object and not when her humanity started showing. For me, this was the huge theme of the book.
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(that's coming from an artist)