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Poetry > Borders

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message 1: by Anthony (new)

Anthony | 140 comments (This is my first poetry post! I don't write poetry that often, so feel free to comment and give advice.)


Clicking heels disrupt the space,
A figure in the quiet café
Rolling in like a black cloud,
Crackling with electricity.

She settles on the center table,
Takes off her leather jacket,
And sits down in the cold seat,
Putting down Macbeth and coffee. Black.

Hazel eyes meet mine and time stops.
An olive complexion, still features, a cascade of dark silk,
Steel-toed boots, a blue sweater and studded jeans.
She is, in a word, enthralling.

A beam of light catches her hand;
A ring casts its reflection over her.
For a moment it twists her image,
Until the truth is in plain sight.

But no one looks past the façade, so carefully built,
To see the scars concealed by long sleeves,
Or the wear of soles from a life of running.
No one sees the plea in her eyes: “save me,” they say.

And then the moment ends, the barista calling,
And I wonder, as she walks, what it’s like
To be worried enough to run away
Yet proud enough to run back.


message 2: by Colby (new)

Colby (colbz) | 3211 comments This is wonderful. I love it. The last stanza is especially beautiful. You are truly talented.


message 3: by Olivia (new)

Olivia | 213 comments This is an extraordinary poem. I love it. I too like the stanze.


message 4: by Taylor (new)

Taylor Huh.

I'll be honest, I'm not sure how I feel about this yet. It's like some movie soundtracks -- I can see the brilliance, but I'm not in love. Does that make sense?


message 5: by Anthony (new)

Anthony | 140 comments @ Colby and Olivia

Thank you so much! I don't write that much poetry, so I am glad you like it.

@ Taylor

I can see what you mean. It's a bit different as far as style goes. Of course, I don't know if I really have a confirmed "style" yet. Some of my poems are more conversational, some are narratives, and some unfold like a story. But thanks for your feedback.


message 6: by Emily Ann (new)

Emily Ann | 78 comments I liked it. It pulled you in and made you wonder what happens to the people in the poem after it's done.


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