Weekly Short Stories Contest and Company! discussion

Weekly Poetry Stuffage > Week 170 (June 10-17). Poems. Topic: Florescence

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message 1: by Kristen (new)

Kristen Marincic Hiestermann | 519 comments haha, nice Belly

Christa - Ron Paul 2016 (christa-ronpaul2012) | 1365 comments Belly, do these just pour out of you at every opportunity? You are so good at it!

Christa - Ron Paul 2016 (christa-ronpaul2012) | 1365 comments Hahaha!!!

message 4: by Edward (new)

Edward (edwardtheresejr) | 2434 comments So ... is the topic florescence or fluorescence? Because they're both different words.

message 5: by Edward (new)

Edward (edwardtheresejr) | 2434 comments I doubt that's a problem, with our loose rules, but I thought I'd point out that florescence means "the act of flowering." Might give y'all new ideas, or y'all can stick with a type of glow.

Christa - Ron Paul 2016 (christa-ronpaul2012) | 1365 comments Belly A.K.A The Goat......

message 7: by Edward (new)

Edward (edwardtheresejr) | 2434 comments That was baad. (This was worse.)

Christa - Ron Paul 2016 (christa-ronpaul2012) | 1365 comments Haha, very classy Al! Finally a happy-ish one.

message 9: by [deleted user] (new)

Lol! Nice one captain :))

message 10: by Ryan (new)

Ryan | 5332 comments Ahahahaha...the Captain's been into the rum... ;o)

message 11: by Hanzleberry (new)

Hanzleberry (Doughboyissweet) | 1065 comments Oh, dear. I don't know if I like this very much. Oh, well. It's way better than that haiku I had, huh, Al? ;)

By Han

My heart melted in the warmth of your hands as you held it close,
my eyes closed with the swoon delivered as words poured from your lips,
my feet stood firm on the rock you secured me to as the sea crashed against it,
my soul found solace when your constant presence was vowed with no conditions to blight or taint it.

The sun that pushes up against the fortress of clouds ignites my passion and warms the tenderness found in my breast.
The mist that sweeps through the meadows paints dew on the grass that cools my tempestuous thoughts and actions that come with torrents of despair.

What is arrayed before me reveals to my tired and torn spirit the mystery of the florescence of life in origin, experience, and what is to come.
Visible in the vast sphere of this life it is evident you loved and formed with a heartbeat heard in thunder and words read in the stars.

Since the emergence of time and breath, now, and forevermore,
a world is placed in front of me that is not made of clay and air,
but of a realm seen only in the waters of your eyes and the light of your beaming face.

Seen above the sensuality of the earth,
beyond the flat and distant horizon.

message 12: by Hanzleberry (new)

Hanzleberry (Doughboyissweet) | 1065 comments Aww, thanks, my loverly. :) <3

message 13: by Ryan (new)

Ryan | 5332 comments Belly-what a fantastic visual!

Hi, Hanz! You've been missed. I have no idea why you don't post more-your writing is beautiful. The 'fortress of clouds' sent a shiver down my spine-stunning!

message 14: by Hanzleberry (new)

Hanzleberry (Doughboyissweet) | 1065 comments Lol, Al. People are so kind. Feedback means so much to me. Thanks, Ryan! :)

message 15: by Rikki (new)

Rikki | 45 comments Imagine

Absorbing every light
Sparks every thought
Ideas are glowing
And illuminating every possibility

( Pretty short for my usual poems but I guess it'll work for this week.)

message 16: by Ajay (new)

Ajay (ajay_n) | 1135 comments :) Just for fun..

Funnels look Flowers look Flutes . . .

If the funnel of a flower is indeed a flute,
It could be blowing kisses to the bees
When they fly in to munch on the pollen.

Wooly molten pollen sheathed in whorls,
Woven together when carpels curl-
Their fingers nuzzling stamen swirls.

Smoothen your bristles Mr. Bee and
Settle in, you must be tired from rubbing
Shoulders with our hot morning's cheeks.
Don't ask the Daisies about it. They're shy.

The foliage, just a lazy girl with outstretched toes.
She ll probably break a knuckle against every scuttle.

Look, I see a crown! Probably just a shard of ice.
Or may be one of Shakespeare's recruits.

Funnels look flowers look flutes,
Tunnels look showers look chutes.


message 17: by Kristen (new)

Kristen Marincic Hiestermann | 519 comments I really like it Ajay. Very cute and springy :) I'd love to hear it recited out loud...

message 18: by Roshan (new)

Roshan Ahmed Untitled

He stared at the black wallet, again,
Lieing, listless, whispering his name.
Dark Clouds gather.

His fingers twitch, lost in lust and greed's itch,
While she beckons with her full bosom; the black witch.
Truth falls farther.

And yet it prevails.
The rain holds.
As he walks away
The clouds part.. The sun breaks through..
He glows.


message 19: by Ajay (new)

Ajay (ajay_n) | 1135 comments Thank you, Kristen and Alex! :) Sure, I ll try and record this. Hmmm. Not too sure though, I'm really awful at stuff like reading aloud and all. It would probably sound like a chimp trying to play the saxophone!

message 20: by Ajay (new)

Ajay (ajay_n) | 1135 comments Haha! You're the sweetest, Alex!

message 21: by Caitlan (new)

Caitlan (lyonessrampant) | 2867 comments I agree with Al, you should definitely record this!

message 22: by Ajay (new)

Ajay (ajay_n) | 1135 comments :) I' ll give it a shot, Kat! Thanks.

message 23: by Christa - Ron Paul 2016 (last edited Jun 14, 2013 09:01PM) (new)

Christa - Ron Paul 2016 (christa-ronpaul2012) | 1365 comments At the risk of sounding like a follower I also agree. I really liked your poem Ajay, it seemed to light hearted and fun. I have a thing for bees. I am sure the meaning of it went totally over my head, but it was fun missing it :D

message 24: by Guy (new)

Guy (egajd) | 11079 comments Belly wrote: "Edward, I know. I've been hanging around with Guy too much lately."


message 25: by Guy (new)

Guy (egajd) | 11079 comments Ajay, I would also love to hear this. Hmmmm. What if we all record it?

the price of flowers for lunch

Ebullient goats
Befit their bellicose reps
By belching blue bells.

message 26: by Guy (new)

Guy (egajd) | 11079 comments Robyn wrote: "Terribly Cheesy Villanelle

The world inside my head expands
It pushes out increasingly
Until it spills into my hands

I sow my world into the land
It grows and blossoms pleasantly
The world insid..."

LoL. This may be a little cheesy, but it is a good effort. The villanelle is TOUGH, and this isn't a bad effort at all.

message 27: by Ajay (new)

Ajay (ajay_n) | 1135 comments Thank you Christa, Belly, Guy!

Belly, you're welcome to it. I'm sure it would be better than any of my attempts! :)

Guy, I loved 'the price of flowers for lunch'! Perfect with my morning tea! Very witty too! And yes, all of us can record it.

message 28: by Guy (new)

Guy (egajd) | 11079 comments Hello, Ajay! I'm glad you enjoyed it. I tried to work 'belied' into it, but I couldn't make it fit. I may try again.

message 29: by M (new)

M | 10802 comments Ryan wrote: “Hi, Hanz! You’ve been missed. I have no idea why you don’t post more-your writing is beautiful. The ‘fortress of clouds’ sent a shiver down my spine-stunning!”

I agree with Ryan!

message 30: by M (last edited Jun 17, 2013 08:13AM) (new)

M | 10802 comments Reversion to Swamp

Moss hangs, unticked hours’
sun and shade.
Huge irises’ flowers
crowd a glade

where, under dark water,
her carved stone,
Judge Lane’s long-haired daughter,
long thought thrown,

lies, pulled from her black steed.
Riding boots,
jodhpurs sleep with duckweed,
cypress roots.

Here she, clad in fine lace,
dreamy eyed,
kept our tryst. The staircase,
rot-sagged, wide,

of the vine-entombed Hall
leads to glooms
of arched doors, plaster fall,
mouldered rooms.

message 31: by C. J., Atm Seeker in the "Lin Kuei" (last edited Jun 16, 2013 10:39AM) (new)

C. J. Scurria (goodreadscomcj_scurria) | 4198 comments Mod

Stars that shine in the daytime
Open to life they give off their hues in gentle yet eye-catching color
I am vastly amazed by their beauty
Little, astounding, beings of nature
A "maker" gives his love of florescence so easily.

message 32: by C. J., Atm Seeker in the "Lin Kuei" (new)

C. J. Scurria (goodreadscomcj_scurria) | 4198 comments Mod
This might be the last time I will be able to post for a while. I will (hopefully) be back soon!

message 33: by M (last edited Jun 16, 2013 11:03AM) (new)

M | 10802 comments Wow, Alex! Thank you. I’ve had to do quite a bit of patching on it.

CJ, where are you going?

message 34: by Guy (new)

Guy (egajd) | 11079 comments We look forward to your return, CJ, and wish you good luck and God speed on your journey where ever you are going.

M, HC that is so powerfully described!

message 35: by M (new)

M | 10802 comments Thank you, Guy!

message 36: by Guy (new)

Guy (egajd) | 11079 comments You're welcome, M.

I have made a recording of all the poems. I will post them in soundcloud for all to listen to. But only if you give me your okay. I'll not upload any without your permission.

By the way, I'm not the best reader, but I love how they all sounded! Nice work everyone!

message 37: by M (last edited Jun 16, 2013 04:10PM) (new)

M | 10802 comments Belly’s “light bleating” wryly capitalizes, for its idea, on the growing trend to lease goats rather than to hire lawn services; and to my delight, he couldn’t resist the temptation to put a spin on the topic.

Alex says that “Eating” is not her entry. However, she posted it in the contest, so I feel at liberty to subject it to commentary. It was a matter of time before somebody put “Belly” and his curious obsession (“goat”) together, and the honor goes to Alex.

Something about the style of Han’s “Beyond” reminds me at once of Whitman and Sandburg, while the wild landscape makes me think of Wuthering Heights. It’s beautiful to read. The images are clear and deliver emotion that’s all the more powerful because it’s controlled.

Rikki’s “Imagine” vividly encapsulates in four lines the mystery of the creative process.

When Ajay picks up the palette knife and starts mixing image and analogy, it won’t be long before another dazzling, impressionistic piece hangs in this little gallery! This week, it’s “Funnels look Flowers look Flutes.” A couple of the lines that really grabbed me are “Don’t ask the Daisies about it. They’re shy” and “The foliage, just a lazy girl with outstretched toes.”

The black witch’s intended victim unexpectedly escapes in Roshan’s untitled poem! The dramatic contrasts of light lend a powerful undercurrent to the narrative.

For me, a villanelle is a difficult form to write, and I think Robyn has done a beautiful job it! “Terribly Cheesy Villanelle” posits, as an intriguing analogy to arriving at inspiration, a cycle of sowing, of pulling up plants that have bloomed then died, and of untangling then drying the roots for future use. I found nothing “cheesy” about this fascinating, beautifully written piece. It’s perfectly tied up by the concluding lines: “The world inside my head expands / Until it spills into my hands.”

Guy’s verse is so loaded with the metaphorical and implied, that I’m almost afraid to touch this one. I thoroughly enjoyed “the price of flowers for lunch”! I have a feeling, though, that I’d best not appear too ebullient or I’ll wind up barfing blue bells.

After reading CJ’s “Flowers,” I’ll forever think of them as “stars that shine in the daytime.” Very nice, CJ!

message 38: by Guy (last edited Jun 24, 2013 06:53AM) (new)

Guy (egajd) | 11079 comments M, would I write a three lined thing so loaded? (LoL!) Fun to write.

I finished reading all poems for this week.

I have been given the okay to share that from:
AJ (from earlier comment - but please confirm),

Thank you everyone! Will take a couple of days (from 2013.06.24) to complete. Announcements to follow.

If you would like my reading of your work to be heard by, potentially, the world, please give me the okay. Note: if you would like to hear if my reading would interest you, you can sample my reading poetry in SoundCloud, at Kat's 'Not Everything' and Koeeoaddi's 'Migraine'.

message 39: by [deleted user] (new)

Guy, that is no nice! Though I must admit, it made me want to go back to bed and sleep :) Can't wait to hear the other poems.

message 40: by Guy (new)

Guy (egajd) | 11079 comments Hopefully all will share. I have it as one recording but will edit out those who don't want me to upload their recording.

message 41: by Rikki (new)

Rikki | 45 comments Permission granted, Guy!

message 42: by Guy (new)

Guy (egajd) | 11079 comments Thank you, Rikki!

message 43: by Guy (new)

Guy (egajd) | 11079 comments Excellent option Al! And thank you for letting me do the recording thing.

message 44: by Ajay (new)

Ajay (ajay_n) | 1135 comments Hello, Guy! Yes, please! Anything I write is up for reading/sharing/critique :)

message 45: by Ajay (new)

Ajay (ajay_n) | 1135 comments Wow. Thank you, M! I've never had a better start to my day. Your commentary always brings me truck loads of motivation. Thank you!

message 46: by Ryan (new)

Ryan | 5332 comments Can't wait to hear them, Guy. This is a very strong week of poetry...

message 47: by Guy (new)

Guy (egajd) | 11079 comments Thank you Ajay! Robyn's given the okay, now all I need is for Roshan and CJ to come forward. Cross my fingers!

message 48: by Roshan (new)

Roshan Ahmed Hey, sorry I didn't get back earlier, Guy. Please feel free. Feels great to be included in such wonderful company.

message 49: by Paula Tohline (new)

Paula Tohline Calhoun (paulatohlinecalhoun) | 493 comments Belly wrote: "light bleating

new lawn treatment chemicals
yield fluorescent goats"

The nighttime feeding
Makes even the blindest goats
happy and obese.

("I'll take that pill now doctor.")

message 50: by Guy (new)

Guy (egajd) | 11079 comments LOL! Nice Pauline! And may I read it and upload it with the others?

Thank you Roshan.

Now just M! M, is it okay to upload my reading of your poem?

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