Goodreads Choice Awards Book Club discussion

Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking
This topic is about Quiet
257 views
Archive - Award Winners > Quiet - June 2013

Comments Showing 1-50 of 70 (70 new)    post a comment »
« previous 1

message 1: by Savanes, Moderator (last edited May 31, 2013 01:31PM) (new) - rated it 3 stars

Savanes | 1997 comments Mod
Goodreads Choice Award Winner - Nonfiction

Subject:
At least one-third of the people we know are introverts. They are the ones who prefer listening to speaking, reading to partying; who innovate and create but dislike self-promotion; who favor working on their own over brainstorming in teams.

This extraordinary book has the power to permanently change how we see introverts and, equally important, how introverts see themselves.

This book promises to be quite interesting and we have the whole month to discuss it.

I'm not sure this book needs spoiler alerts (I'm planning to read it with you). However, please use spoiler tags if you think they are appropriate.

I will post questions throughout the month but feel free to post your thoughts right now if you've read the book.

Happy reading!


Cathie (catitude) | 1511 comments I am so looking forward to reading this with you all :-)


message 3: by Savanes, Moderator (new) - rated it 3 stars

Savanes | 1997 comments Mod
Cathie wrote: "I am so looking forward to reading this with you all :-)"

Me too, it looks very interesting and from the summary, I have a feeling I might be an ignored introvert!


Cathie (catitude) | 1511 comments Maybe.

She has an excellent talk on Teds Talks based on this book. I'll see if I can find the link later on when everyone has finished reading the book for this month.


message 5: by Savanes, Moderator (new) - rated it 3 stars

Savanes | 1997 comments Mod
Cool!


Shruti | 1 comments I have read this book.. Must say it is an excellent read!for all the introverts - you will make some great discoveries about yourself.. For all the extroverts- it will surely help you understand the introverts around you.. A must must read :)


message 7: by Carrie (new)

Carrie Rubin (carrierubin) This book is my 'bible.' Reading it made me understand I wasn't weird--I was just an introvert. Well, okay, maybe a little weird...

I look forward to the discussion!


message 8: by Savanes, Moderator (new) - rated it 3 stars

Savanes | 1997 comments Mod
Carrie wrote: "This book is my 'bible.' Reading it made me understand I wasn't weird--I was just an introvert. Well, okay, maybe a little weird...

I look forward to the discussion!"


Weird is good Carrie! ;)


message 9: by Carrie (new)

Carrie Rubin (carrierubin) Vanessa wrote: "Weird is good Carrie! ;)"

Not according to my kids...


message 10: by Savanes, Moderator (new) - rated it 3 stars

Savanes | 1997 comments Mod
In the introduction of the book, you can take a test to assess whether you're an introvert. What are you: Introvert, Extrovert or Ambivert? Are you introvert in some situations end extrovert in others? Were you surprised by the results?


message 11: by Stacey (new)

Stacey (monkeymom1120) | 2 comments I am mostly introverted with some extrovert tendencies. I agree with the assessment.


ElvenRaven | 244 comments I'm an introvert, not that I didn't know that LOL
I like the book so far, it's very interesting :)


message 13: by Savanes, Moderator (new) - rated it 3 stars

Savanes | 1997 comments Mod
I guess a lot of people on GR must be introverts. I was both...


message 14: by Lynn, Moderator (new) - added it

Lynn | 4021 comments Mod
I hadn't actually planned to read this but I'm really interested in taking the quiz!


Cathie (catitude) | 1511 comments Vanessa wrote: "In the introduction of the book, you can take a test to assess whether you're an introvert. What are you: Introvert, Extrovert or Ambivert? Are you introvert in some situations end extrovert in oth..."

I am definitely an introvert; scored like 14 out of the 17 (? ~ books not in front of me at the moment) questions as true.

I think most people on Goodreads and Social Media sites are introverts (or at least latent introverts). It's so much easier to be gregarious and outgoing online than it is face-to-face.

I like how the book points out that just because you are not shy does not mean you are an extrovert and that shyness is a social phobia not a sign you are an introvert.

I'm reading this one slowly :-). I'm only at the Anthony Robbins chapter but I'm really liking it. I went to an UPW weekend conference and have walked on the fire with Anthony Robbins and his rah-rah people. I did it after I had broken my back and was on the mend and it was one of the best thousands I ever spent simply because it got me past the mindset of "I have/had a broken back and I can't do much/anything now." I burnt my feet walking on those searing hot coals because I couldn't move fast enough; I still have a scar on my right foot today from it, that I lovingly touch every so often, to remind that I can do things that terrify me. (As a side note, Robbins said to participants that only those who can't believe it can be done will experience any pain or feel hurt and yep, in my head, I kept thinking I can't do this, I'm different then everyone here; I've just learned how to walk again and you want me to run!"...but I did it!)


message 16: by Carrie (new)

Carrie Rubin (carrierubin) Cathie wrote: "It's so much easier to be gregarious and outgoing online than it is face-to-face."

The Internet, text messaging, and caller ID are dreams come true for introverts. It's interesting in the book that Cain mentions many introverts loathe talking on the phone or answering the door. As an introvert, I understand that.


message 17: by Cathie (last edited Jun 03, 2013 07:41AM) (new) - rated it 4 stars

Cathie (catitude) | 1511 comments I'm the same way Carrie. I just thought there was always something "wrong" with me, lol.

I have worked in the motivational seminar field and have put on public speaking/motivational seminars and being in front of a room full of people does not knot my stomach as much as picking up that stupid phone and making initial contact without a face. I remember when I was doing phone sales calls to clients in the U.S. and I would literally have to practice over and over again how and what to say on the phone without my voice sounding like it was trembling.

The written word and written communication has always been my stongest point.


message 18: by Carrie (new)

Carrie Rubin (carrierubin) @Cathie So nice to hear I'm not alone in my phone aversion!


Cathie (catitude) | 1511 comments I also like how the book says that just because someone is social does not mean that they are not an introvert. The Culture of Personality that we have seen since the 1920s is so true.


message 20: by Kristie, Moderator (new)

Kristie | 5821 comments Mod
Cathie wrote: "Vanessa wrote: "In the introduction of the book, you can take a test to assess whether you're an introvert. What are you: Introvert, Extrovert or Ambivert? Are you introvert in some situations end ..."

Wow Cathie! Congratulations. I always think that I'd be too frightened to walk the coals. That's quite a story.


message 21: by Kristie, Moderator (new)

Kristie | 5821 comments Mod
Carrie wrote: "@Cathie So nice to hear I'm not alone in my phone aversion!"

I used to be an office manager and would procrastinate on making phone calls until I absolutely had to. i was fine with getting calls, but making them is always hard for me. Even now, I do therapeutic mentoring and the family has to request my services, but the first call and especially the first visit always cause me anxiety because I have to make the call and go to their house (initiate the contact). You are definitely not alone!


Cathie (catitude) | 1511 comments I don't think anyone would be too frightened to walk the coals Kristie, because the environment lends to the mentality that you are the odd one out if you DON'T walk the coals. Besides, I paid to walk those coals, lol


message 23: by Kristie, Moderator (new)

Kristie | 5821 comments Mod
Cathie wrote: "I don't think anyone would be too frightened to walk the coals Kristie, because the environment lends to the mentality that you are the odd one out if you DON'T walk the coals. Besides, I paid to ..."

I know...you'd stand out like a mad woman if you DIDN'T walk them, which is fairly ironic to me. The peer pressure would be intense. I suppose the reality is that I wouldn't sign up for it because I know I'd do it. lol

I had to take the test because you guys have me so curious!! (I'm planning to read the book a little later.) I turned out to be an ambivert. Though some of the questions were a bit tough for me. Do I prefer A or B....I don't know, sometimes I like A, sometimes B. I guess it depends on my mood.


message 24: by Cathie (last edited Jun 03, 2013 08:33AM) (new) - rated it 4 stars

Cathie (catitude) | 1511 comments While I was taking the test I also thought my answers would have been a whole lot different in my 20s, 30s and even 40s. So...maybe we become introverted as we age?

Either that, or more life experiences that tend to make us realize that we are not as "unique" as we once thought we were (or as wonderful! lol) and that can make someone more reticent in their approach to life?


message 25: by Lynn, Moderator (last edited Jun 03, 2013 08:41AM) (new) - added it

Lynn | 4021 comments Mod
I don't suppose the questions could be posted on here? I really don't have time to fit this one in this month (I've had to be quite ruthless with my choices) but I am really interested in the quiz.

Edit - Is this it or some variation of? http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/q...


message 26: by Kristie, Moderator (new)

Kristie | 5821 comments Mod
I think that's the same quiz Lynn.


message 27: by Savanes, Moderator (new) - rated it 3 stars

Savanes | 1997 comments Mod
Lynn, I'm not sure we can do that... :(


message 28: by Kristie, Moderator (new)

Kristie | 5821 comments Mod
Cathie wrote: "While I was taking the test I also thought my answers would have been a whole lot different in my 20s, 30s and even 40s. So...maybe we become introverted as we age?

Either that, or more life expe..."


lol Cathie - I think I've gotten more extroverted as I've gotten older. I was very shy and insecure when I was younger. As I've aged I've become more comfortable with myself and therefor I am now more comfortable with others and putting myself out there a bit more. Still not an extrovert though.


message 29: by Lynn, Moderator (last edited Jun 03, 2013 09:04AM) (new) - added it

Lynn | 4021 comments Mod
Kristie wrote: "I think that's the same quiz Lynn."

I'm an extrovert..... I'm not surprised really.


Anima Miejska | 1698 comments I did the quiz, although I plan to read the book later in the month.

It not surprisingly turns out that I'm an introvert, although I also notice that I've headed more and more toward an extrovert end of the scale as I've gotten older. Still, I'm definitely an introvert.

And I also dislike making phone calls, I prefer email or txt messages, but most of all, one on one communication.


message 31: by Jojo (new) - rated it 3 stars

Jojo (jojosbooknook) | 717 comments I'm an introvert. But I knew that before I did the quiz! Lol!


Cathie (catitude) | 1511 comments I'm just the opposite Kristie. I was brash and brazen and was so full of myself when I was younger and thank God as I got older have more humility. I agree my confidence level is much higher now, which is why I am comfortable with acknowledging I am an introvert these days. As a younger person I always had to be "out there" and would have felt ashamed if anyone called me an introvert, probably due to the mistaken assumption that introverts are insecure. Like the book says and like you said Kristie, being introverted has nothing to do with self-esteem or insecurity.


Cathie (catitude) | 1511 comments I should probably add that it didn't have anything to do with self-esteem or insecurity until the 20th century when so much focus started to be valued on the "public" side of life, and less on the "private".


message 34: by Kristie, Moderator (new)

Kristie | 5821 comments Mod
Agreed Cathie. I haven't read the book yet though. I'm hoping by the end of the month, but as usual I have so many books to read this month!


ElvenRaven | 244 comments Carrie wrote: "The Internet, text messaging, and caller ID are dreams come true for introverts."
So true! I avoid making calls as much as possible, so text messages are really useful for me.


Brooke Bryan | 8 comments I'm an introvert all the way. I'm excited to read this book, I just have a few more to finish before I can start. Ok I have a huge list I need to read...


Cathie (catitude) | 1511 comments lol, yep, I know about that huge list to read Brooke. I think you will enjoy this book when you read it.


message 38: by Agustin (new)

Agustin (dantooine) | 1 comments lol...looks like most of you are introverts! I wonder if you guys are not answering exactly what you need to match the image you have from your own selves. I didn't read this thing but couldn't help asking...
I might join though, looks fun! :)


Cathie (catitude) | 1511 comments Well Agustin, it definitely is an internal quiz. It asks how you feel and what you prefer.

Everyone, who doesn't know me really well, would say I was an extrovert and they would probably add a definitely to that :-). On the outside I am very social, have a very large group of acquaintances, (but a small group of close personal "I let people in" friends) do public speaking and event planning seminars, lead community and therapy groups, etc. Over the years I have just started to listen more to my internal side and I have had a couple of life experiences where the social aspect of my life has been curtailed so I got to really know what I was like without all the social happenings in my life.

Pick up the book; it's a very interesting read :-)


message 40: by Carrie (new)

Carrie Rubin (carrierubin) I found the chapter where Cain discusses introverts in the educational system interesting and reassuring. As a mother of an introvert, it's difficult to hear well-meaning teachers tell me year after year that my son needs to 'come out of his shell.' As an introvert myself, I know one doesn't ever really 'come out of his/her shell.' Many introverts, however, learn over time how to don the social mask, though for most, this social immersion comes easier in a professional setting than a purely social one.


message 41: by Savanes, Moderator (last edited Jun 05, 2013 01:07PM) (new) - rated it 3 stars

Savanes | 1997 comments Mod
I really don't mind, I even love it!!! But I HATE, HATE, HATE leaving voice messages. I also can't make a phone call when someone is in the same room (esp. work related). I feel so self-conscious, I start stammering, I can't find my words... The recipe for the worst phone call ever!


Cathie (catitude) | 1511 comments Susan Cain did a video chat on here yesterday. I missed it live, as I've been sick with a migraine and sinus head pain all this week, but caught it this morning. This is the link for anyone interested:
http://www.goodreads.com/topic/video_...


message 43: by Savanes, Moderator (new) - rated it 3 stars

Savanes | 1997 comments Mod
Cathie wrote: "Susan Cain did a video chat on here yesterday. I missed it live, as I've been sick with a migraine and sinus head pain all this week, but caught it this morning. This is the link for anyone inter..."

Thanks Cathie!!


Anima Miejska | 1698 comments Cathie, thanks for the link, I hope you feel better.


Cathie (catitude) | 1511 comments Thanks Anima :-). Me too; it sure has cut into my reading.


Anima Miejska | 1698 comments Then, I hope you are back on track soon, being ill and unable to read is the worst combination of circumstances for me.


message 47: by Savanes, Moderator (new) - rated it 3 stars

Savanes | 1997 comments Mod
Cathie, can you at least settle for a TV show?


Cathie (catitude) | 1511 comments Not very well Vanessa; light and sound hurts. Feels like I've been punched repeatedly in the head and cheek area. So sore...even the light from this computer screen is hard to look at for any length of time :-(.

just shoot me now....


message 49: by Savanes, Moderator (new) - rated it 3 stars

Savanes | 1997 comments Mod
Cathie wrote: "Not very well Vanessa; light and sound hurts. Feels like I've been punched repeatedly in the head and cheek area. So sore...even the light from this computer screen is hard to look at for any len..."

A hot bath (in the dark and without music) with a lot of bubbles might help...
I don't own a gun so I can't help with your request ;) I would suggest getting away from the computer screen though! Take care of yourself Cathie!


message 50: by LB (new) - rated it 4 stars

LB (lbandj) | 12 comments Ambivert! I had 11 of the 20 true. I am not surprised, but I never knew such a term existed. I love being around people, and I feed off their energy, but when it comes to working, I like my solitude and hate talking on the phone. DH is a definite introvert, and it has been interesting to read this with him in mind. (Like if we are out somewhere, when we come home, he has to unwind for a bit, and I never understood that, but now I do a bit better!)


« previous 1
back to top