But, seriously, folks,

[Tentatively,]

I was standing by a street recently when someone walked their dog up & the dog lifted its leg & peed on me. I sd "Hey! Yr dog just peed on me!" & the human sd to the dog "That's odd, a talking tree!" - to wch the dog replied "BARK!" & I realized that at least the dog & I spoke the same language.

[Tentatively,]

Hey! I thought it was pretty remarkable that I awoke at 5AM (to pee - after dreaming about being in a public space w/ alotof people around & its being winter & not being able to find a tree to pee behind b/c all the tress were small & bare) & then thought of that TREE & DOG joke. I mean, I made that one up while I was half-asleep &, LOOK!, it's already held up to the test of time these looooooonnnnnnngggggggg hr&1/2s passed/past.