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message 1: by [deleted user] (last edited Mar 20, 2013 01:18AM) (new)

As you all know, the beginning of a novel is what makes or breaks you. It's what makes the reader decide whether they are going to keep reading or shelf it.

BUT the synopsis is what gets a person to open the book and start reading the first page.

I'm going to offer up a synopsis for a couple of my works in proogress for discussion. I encourage you all to do the same if you're feling brave!


message 2: by [deleted user] (last edited Mar 19, 2013 03:49PM) (new)

Fake it by Jessica Marie Gilliland

Breeta is a self indulgent kleptomaniac who loves anything sparkly and expensive. Harlow is a short tempered badass with few morals and even fewer inhibitions. Evee would be a normal eighteen year old girl if it wasn't for the other two swimming around in her brain and occasionally taking over her body.

Jonathan has no idea that his girlfriend Evee has a personality disorder and she wants to keep it that way, but after an incident involving Harlow, a rapist and a big knife, Evee and Jonathan find themselves on the run. The longer they are on the lam, the harder it is for Evee to keep Harlow and Breeta in check.

When Jonathan figures out what’s really going on with Evee, he proposes a way to cure her of her extra personalities, sending Evee on a journey to discover a past Harlow and Breeta have tried to keep hidden from her and Evee begins to question everything she’s ever known.


message 3: by [deleted user] (new)

Little red lies by Jessica Marie Gilliland

Celia has told so many lies the past few weeks that even she doesn't know what the truth is anymore.

Last month Tyler Matthews disappeared. Even before Tyler went missing, everyone knew his name. He was quarterback for the Summerfield Titans and had broken the heart of nearly every Summerfield High School girl with his attentions or lack thereof.

But no one knew Celia.

Which meant they didn't know about her trysts with Tyler by the lake in the weeks before his disappearance. They didn't know about the bodies beneath Tyler's father's cabin and they didn't know what went down the night Tyler disappeared.


message 4: by Cassandra (new)

Cassandra Giovanni | 35 comments Jessica wrote: "Little red lies by Jessica Marie Gilliland

Celia has told so many lies the past few weeks that even she doesn't know what the truth is anymore.

Last month Tyler Matthews disappeared. Even before ..."


Now, that, THAT, I have to read...


message 5: by Cyndi (new)

Cyndi Goodgame | 35 comments So agree on Little Red Lies. Looking forward to that one right now.

Fake it sounds great cuz' I am PYAF-Paranormal YA Freak and will like it either way.

I will probably like anything you or any paranormal writer...writes. I'm that versatile in my likes. My moods, for one thing, change week to week,...so it depends on what mood you catch. I hope that others are like this at least some of the time so that a book that doesn't sound good one day may the next. With that said, I can't wait to post one tomorrow and see others.

lol

My student had a fabulous idea for a book and I begged her to let me write it. Her 12 year old nose wrinkled up and she looked sideways at me, "Copyright, Mrs. G. Not a chance."

These kids are growing up too fast.


message 6: by [deleted user] (last edited Mar 19, 2013 06:11PM) (new)

Thanks guys and LMAO at the copyright part. I love that hahaha!


message 7: by Cyndi (last edited Mar 21, 2013 09:00AM) (new)

Cyndi Goodgame | 35 comments Here is my current NEW project intended for junior high and up.

DENIAL (Goblin's Kiss Trilogy)

Emma has a secret. A power she can’t control.

Emma started her first day of senior year. The new guy in school catches the eye of all, including hers. He has a single target though. Emma.
She stopped frozen in her step the moment she saw him in the hallway walking with the gaggle of cheer girls following behind him. Her lack of reaction is noted by him with a smug chuckle under his breath that she herself notes and breaks the semi-standoff with a roll of her eyes aimed straight at him. But something happened in that moment. Something dangerously close to magical like the power hidden inside her.

Ames Cahn is not good. He has a past.

A dark past that isn’t natural. But is it darker than Emma can handle? On one hand he doesn’t care, he has to have her. On the other, can he taint something so pure and good even if she couldn’t help her heritage? But the king wants her. She is untouchable and not to be tampered with. In the beginning he denies every single incident leading to what she really is. Secrets he isn’t ready to share.

Caught between two different worlds, Emma must make a choice that isn’t easy. When she faces the finality of the truth, she is confronted with the fear that even Ames cannot save her from a fate worse than death in her eyes.


message 8: by [deleted user] (new)

ooooh! Ok I'm usually turned off when I hear the story is about a new guy/girl in high school buuuuuuut...

"She stopped frozen in her step the moment she saw him in the hallway walking with the gaggle of cheer girls following behind him. Her lack of reaction is noted by him with a smug chuckle under his breath that she herself notes and breaks the semi-standoff with a roll of her eyes aimed straight at him. But something happened in that moment. Something dangerously close to magical like the power hidden inside her."

This part felt more like a sample than a synopsis but I have to say that the last line "But something happened in that moment. Something dangerously close to magical like the power hidden inside her." is what hooked me!

I really like the conflicts brought up in the second to last paragraph and that is what would have gotten me to actually read a few pages, but there is something off about the way they are formatted. I think "Ames Cahn has a past." is great because it mirrors the part with Emma at the start, but all the questions are throwing me off I think. "Ames Cahn has a past. A dark and unnatural past that Emma may not be able to handle, but Ames doesn't care. He was to have her." or something like that may be a possible solution.

Then bring up the king and the fact that Ames isn't ready to share her secrets.

And the last paragrah is perfect.

My last question... When can I read it? lol!


message 9: by Cyndi (new)

Cyndi Goodgame | 35 comments I on it now. Will revamp and get back! Love the feedback! This is what our group will shine in the most, I think! =)


message 10: by [deleted user] (new)

Phew! I get kinda nervous when I offer critique like that :P


message 11: by Cyndi (new)

Cyndi Goodgame | 35 comments Ha, you sound just like my editor. She worries too much. I guess I only like advice from those who offer suggestions. The teacher in me thinks of how others see it....no one wants not to be told it's WRONG, but how to improve it. You were great.

Besides...we are all on the same team....Team Edward that is!!!!!!!


message 12: by [deleted user] (new)

Hahahaha! Ok cool ;)


message 13: by Hazel (new)

Hazel West | 107 comments Mod
Jessica wrote: "Little red lies by Jessica Marie Gilliland

Celia has told so many lies the past few weeks that even she doesn't know what the truth is anymore.

Last month Tyler Matthews disappeared. Even before ..."


This is definitely a gripping synopsis that would make a reader want to find out what happens. I actually particularly like it because you don't offer a plethora of information. I always hate synopses that practically tell the whole story before you read it. I always have a hard time with the line between too much info and not enough.


message 14: by Hazel (new)

Hazel West | 107 comments Mod
Cyndi wrote: "Here is my current NEW project intended for junior high and up.

DENIAL (Goblin's Kiss Trilogy)

Emma has a secret. A power she can’t control.

Emma started her first day of senior year. The ne..."


This isn't exactly my kind of read, but I really like the style you used for the synopsis. It almost feels like the beginning of a story instead of a breakdown of what happens in one.


message 15: by Hazel (new)

Hazel West | 107 comments Mod
Okay, so here's the synopsis from my WIP A Case of Poisons that I'm looking for opinions on:

Anthony Maxwell is a private investigator, a consultant for the mostly incompetent inspectors at Scotland Yard, on occasion a writer, and always a lover of coffee. He has been working small cases for several years to pay the bills when he’s introduced to the first multiple murder case of his career early one morning, when a witness catches a man trying to unload a body to bury in a nearby graveyard. Soon the first body is joined by three more in the course of a single morning and Anthony knows this is no ordinary serial murder case. And why is the murderer targeting beggars and urchin children? If that wasn’t cause enough to worry, all the victims are covered with horrible wounds and show signs of exotic poisoning. Anthony, along with his partners Tobias—an ex-broadsman and well-know charmer—and Scamp—a street smart and talented young woman—work to find out who is murdering the helpless beggars and children in such horrifying ways. The first book in this new Victorian steampunk series takes the three companions to the limits of their abilities as they go up against canny murderers, bruisers who appear invincible, anarchist groups, and even ancient British royalty in the biggest case Anthony Maxwell has ever worked in his career.


message 16: by Cyndi (new)

Cyndi Goodgame | 35 comments Hazel, I like it. The characters already stand out to me and have complexity from just the synopsis. I would love to see it in a movie too. LOL

My brain autos on paranormal, but this book could go either way in my eyes. Bone Collector kind of book. I like!


message 17: by Natasha (new)

Natasha (natashasnow) Jessica wrote: "Little red lies by Jessica Marie Gilliland

Celia has told so many lies the past few weeks that even she doesn't know what the truth is anymore.

Last month Tyler Matthews disappeared. Even before ..."
This sounds fantastic!!


message 18: by Hazel (new)

Hazel West | 107 comments Mod
Cyndi wrote: "Hazel, I like it. The characters already stand out to me and have complexity from just the synopsis. I would love to see it in a movie too. LOL

My brain autos on paranormal, but this book could..."


Hehe, I'd love to see it as a movie too, I've already picked my Anthony ;)

Well, I can't say the series will hold actual paranormal happenings, but there might be things that are thought to be ;) And it is a steampunk so not everything is exactly true to the actual Victorian era.


message 19: by [deleted user] (new)

Natasha wrote: "Jessica wrote: "Little red lies by Jessica Marie Gilliland

Celia has told so many lies the past few weeks that even she doesn't know what the truth is anymore.

Last month Tyler Matthews disappear..."


WoW! thanks everyone. I guess I should get to work finishing this one up first ;)


message 20: by Cassandra (new)

Cassandra Giovanni | 35 comments Jessica wrote: "Natasha wrote: "Jessica wrote: "Little red lies by Jessica Marie Gilliland

Celia has told so many lies the past few weeks that even she doesn't know what the truth is anymore.

Last month Tyler Ma..."


Do you write your synopsis before writing the actual book?


message 21: by [deleted user] (last edited Mar 23, 2013 03:01PM) (new)

Yeah for a lot of them I do becuase the process starts with an idea (roughly a synopsis) then a series of outlines, then a gradual building of the chapters. I rarely write something chapter by chapter... Actually, I've never written anything chapter by chapter. Little Red Lies is not complete yet but all the outlines are done and some of the chapters are fleshed out... I'd say its only about 40% there.


message 22: by Sandra (new)

Sandra Bennett | 22 comments Hi everyone, sorry It's been awhile since I've had a chance to write, but I have been trying to keep up with the updates. All of your synopsis sound amazing and I believe it has all been said about them. Can't wait to read Jessica's "Little Red Lies" and I thought the same thing as I read yours Hazel. "A Case of Poison" would make a fabulous movie!

Ok so, here is my synopsis for book 2 of my children's short chapter book series, this one is called "Alien Shenanigans"

There is trouble afoot in Mr Haggardy's clasromm. An unexplainable explosion in a science experiment wreaks havoc once again and Principal Penwright knows exactly who to blame! Can Brian and his brothers solve the mystery before the snooping Mrs Witherbottom discovers the unbelievable truth behind all the shenanigans?

Brian, David and Simon Bradberrie return in part two of their alien adventure. Mischief and mayhem abounds whenever they are involved. The school is a disaster zone but is it really their fault this time?


message 23: by [deleted user] (new)

I really like this one, Sandra :) Its short, sweet, has intrigue and personality. I'd read it!


message 24: by Cassandra (new)

Cassandra Giovanni | 35 comments Jessica wrote: "Yeah for a lot of them I do becuase the process starts with an idea (roughly a synopsis) then a series of outlines, then a gradual building of the chapters. I rarely write something chapter by chap..."

I don't write my synopsis until the book is done...and I've never written anything but English papers with an outline! Interesting.


message 25: by [deleted user] (new)

I'm actually writing a blog about outlines and my writing process so I won't go into super detail about it here. I'm not saying it has to be a super detailed outline but more of a focusing of your ideas and what the point of the story is... just like you'd do with an english paper, actually.

I can't imagine you just sit and write a story without having even the slightest idea what the end will be (whether you change the ending or not) you know what you're working toward. I bet you do something similar in your head during your writing process and maybe don't even realize it.


message 26: by Cassandra (new)

Cassandra Giovanni | 35 comments Jessica wrote: "I'm actually writing a blog about outlines and my writing process so I won't go into super detail about it here. I'm not saying it has to be a super detailed outline but more of a focusing of your ..."
I'm extremely organized with things like English papers and technical writing (I wrote procedures for the financial institution I work at for a few years but then switched positions, and just recently they started asking me to write them again). My novel writing has always been a bit different. It's interesting that it comes out so cohesively (or what I hope is).

I actually don't outline anything.I write scenes as they come to my mind--I don't know where I am heading until I am about half-way through sometimes--other times, like with In Between Seasons, the last scene was the first scene I wrote. I call it sporadic writing. I don't write in any order--After I have about 20 scenes I start organizing them so they flow. I just write the scenes as they come and then I "tie" them together afterwards. I think someone once referenced it as "pantser" writing style.
I have to write the synopsis for Just One Cup now...which is going to be fun. I hate writing the synopsis--I'd much rather write a whole other novel. Now I'm off to spend two hours writing a 20 line synopsis when I normally could write 10,000 words of a book...


message 27: by [deleted user] (new)

What you call "sporadic writing" is exactly what I mean by outlining. You tying your ideas together is forming an outline of a novel that you will (hopefully) continue to mold and sculpt into the final novel. I'm telling you, if you looked at all of your little chapters and snippets that you tied together, you'll have a workable synopsis without having to think about it. I never spend more than a few minutes thinking about a synopsis, and if I do say so myself, our synopsis' have been pretty successful at getting a reader's attention ;)


message 28: by Cassandra (new)

Cassandra Giovanni | 35 comments Jessica wrote: "What you call "sporadic writing" is exactly what I mean by outlining. You tying your ideas together is forming an outline of a novel that you will (hopefully) continue to mold and sculpt into the f..."

Ummm...This is what I managed in an hour:
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but your words...they'll destroy my soul.

Emma Walker was a writer who'd lost herself to someone else's anger--who had given up on ever feeling like herself again.

Evan Levesque was a rock-god--the one all the woman wanted, but he'd never gotten used to the loneliness between the stage and real life.


with just one cup of coffee they will begin a journey together where they face who they are, who they've been and who they can become if they only let one another in.

I'm not ready to synopsize it yet...I guess my cover reveal host will have to wait...


message 29: by [deleted user] (new)

I think that's great!
Catchy, short, just enough back story and a little but of intrigue at the end ;)


message 30: by Cassandra (new)

Cassandra Giovanni | 35 comments Jessica wrote: "I think that's great!
Catchy, short, just enough back story and a little but of intrigue at the end ;)"


It's sooo short, though! I just don't know what to put in between. It's a love story about a musician, and a woman whose not famous--she's a journalist because she can't bring herself to really write anymore. The main reason--an abusive ex-boyfriend.


message 31: by [deleted user] (new)

You're pitching the idea to a reader and youve accomplished that already.Too much detail ruins it. Don't over think it. If you want to come up with a couple more that are a little more detailed I'm sure the group will weigh in and tell you what they like and what they don't but I'm a big fan of a short sweet pitch ;) honestly I like this better than any of your other ones!


message 32: by Cassandra (new)

Cassandra Giovanni | 35 comments Jessica wrote: "You're pitching the idea to a reader and youve accomplished that already.Too much detail ruins it. Don't over think it. If you want to come up with a couple more that are a little more detailed I'm..."
Test...1.2.3:
Emma Walker was a writer who'd lost herself to someone else's anger--who had given up on ever feeling like herself again.
Evan Levesque was a rock-god--the one all the woman wanted, but he'd never gotten used to the loneliness between the stage and real life.
With just one cup of coffee they'll begin a journey of self-discovery at each others sides, but can Emma handle Evan's fame while dealing with her own demons? Emma's checkered personal past, a bad relationship that haunts the edges of her memories, threatens to make everything implode on them when Evan takes matters into his own hands.
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but your words...they'll destroy my soul--Can Emma handle being put back together, and facing who she's become because of it?


message 33: by [deleted user] (new)

Also this is supposed to get people to want to read it. I don't want to read a book that's pretty much spelled out for me in a synopsis. This seems to be a character piece so all you need is a little bit about who the characters are and some intrigue about what they are going through in the story and you've got that here in spades!


message 34: by Cassandra (new)

Cassandra Giovanni | 35 comments Jessica wrote: "Also this is supposed to get people to want to read it. I don't want to read a book that's pretty much spelled out for me in a synopsis. This seems to be a character piece so all you need is a litt..."
You made me feel better! Looking at your synopsis made my jaw drop--you make it look so easy!!


message 35: by [deleted user] (new)

Aww thank you. You did an awesome job in barely an hour so give yourself some credit too! I think it's great but like I said if you want to tinker with it an repost something we can all give some input until you are satisfied. That's what I wanted for this group :)


message 36: by Garrison (new)

Garrison Kelly (cybador) Of all the things I write, there are two things I consider to be my Achilles Heels: signing high school yearbooks and writing synopses. Whenever I signed a yearbook, I just put an ellipses in quotation marks and then my name. Whenever I write a synopsis, getting out of it isn’t that easy. Bear these things in mind as I present to you the unofficial synopsis for my three-part novel WIP: Brawl-Mart:

Mitch McLeod is a professional wrestler who scratches and claws for the main event spotlight. Wes Edwards and Jacob Kruger are clam fishermen who want a clean place to do their work and a hot meal every night. Lillian Floyd is an office jockey who wants freedom from obnoxious and annoying debt collectors calling her every night. Despite these things being the most reasonable requests in the world, there’s always someone from the higher ups telling them to wish in one hand and shit in the other to see which one fills up first. When these four working class heroes are faced with the possibility of living on the streets, they do the one thing that makes the most sense: fight the machine with bare knuckles and laced-up boots. The 99% are bringing 100% justice to an economy that threw them overboard a long time ago. Live the revolution with a copy of Brawl-Mart!


message 37: by M.M. (new)

M.M. John (mmjohn) | 17 comments Jessica, your stories sounds soooo interesting!
I'm on my phone, but well be back to read the rest and hopefully comment, and post my own!


message 38: by [deleted user] (new)

Thanks! Hopefully I can fix my computer and get back to work soon. Excited to read what you've got :)


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