Gillifans discussion

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message 1: by Danni, Spoogegirl / Mrs Brown (new)

Danni | 136 comments Mod
Where are my manners? I forgot to post the ever important welcome thread. So welcome all, help yourself to a cup of tea (let Gilli have some time off this chore), and a hobnob, and introduce yourself.


message 2: by Macky (new)

Macky (mactut) | 142 comments Hi sorry you caught me dunking a ginger ( wince) biccy in my tea because I hate f****ing hobnobs, actually Ive never f****ed one because that would be impossible ( lie detector says TRUE) .... But I'm digressing.. Sorry miss!
I am a massive fan of the Houseboy books and have just recently finished them so Gilli has firmly wormed his way into my heart.... Its thanks to our lovely moderator that I got hooked . One book and I had to read the lot back to back. Happy to support our lovely boy! Anyhoo- back to my tea and biccy. Catch you later!


message 3: by JustJen "Miss Conduct" (last edited Mar 18, 2013 05:39AM) (new)

JustJen "Miss Conduct" | 16 comments Thanks for the invite, Danni. Sad to say I've had these lined up in my TBR for like ever. I'm going to start on them today! :D


message 4: by Danni, Spoogegirl / Mrs Brown (new)

Danni | 136 comments Mod
JustJen wrote: "Thanks for the invite, Danni. Said to say I've had these lined up in my TBR for like ever. I'm going to start on them today! :D"

Ah, a Gilli virgin - I'm so jealous.


message 5: by Danni, Spoogegirl / Mrs Brown (new)

Danni | 136 comments Mod
Oh my word, we have 7 members already! It seems I can only invite people I am friends with on GR without resorting to emailing or facebooking, so if you know any Gillifans hiding somewhere, please invite them to come join us.


message 6: by Tina (new)

Tina (whitemooony) Thx for the invite, Danni.
I hope you all are patient with me and my English... :)

@JustJen: You are a Gilli virgin? I hope you change that soon. He's so adorable. I'm sure reading his diaries is going to be a very emotional roller coaster ride for you. Don't forget to buy tissues! :)


message 7: by Danni, Spoogegirl / Mrs Brown (new)

Danni | 136 comments Mod
Hi Tina, this is likely to be a very patient and laid-back group (or lazy perhaps, depending on how you look at it) so don't worry about your English - it's lovely to see you here.

Us Gilli old-timers may need to support Jen through her deflowering just in case it all becomes too much for her emotionally.


JustJen "Miss Conduct" | 16 comments Ok. You guys have me all excited to jump into this finally, but I have to work! I'm really hoping to get going this morning though. :D


message 9: by Macky (new)

Macky (mactut) | 142 comments Hi Jen, be prepared to lose your heart :)

@ Tina... Your English is fantastic Mrs!! :D


message 10: by [deleted user] (new)

Thank you for the invite, sorry still need to read them and know now that all your books are on my to buy list next month, after reading about Gilli I can't wait to have the money to buy them :-)

Then I can talk with you all about them, but I do not know if I agree with or not


message 11: by Macky (new)

Macky (mactut) | 142 comments Hurray Helle is here! I think you'll be a Gilli fan girl too. Tissues at the ready. :)


message 12: by Danni, Spoogegirl / Mrs Brown (new)

Danni | 136 comments Mod
Nice to see you here Helle, even if you haven't read the books yet, there's no reason you can't pop into the xmas summer house to snuggle under the blankets and enjoy a nice cup of tea and a chat :) Make yourself at home.


message 13: by [deleted user] (new)

Thank you and love to see your xmas summer house with crystals and meditation corner and kitten :-)


message 14: by [deleted user] (new)

Hi Macky I think you are right about that and thank for warning me about the tissues, I will have that ready when I read the books :-)


message 15: by Julia (new)

Julia | 21 comments **SPLASH!**

Another duck lands in Lake Gillibran....

Thanks for the invite!


message 16: by Julia (new)

Julia | 21 comments Danni wrote: "Oh my word, we have 7 members already! It seems I can only invite people I am friends with on GR without resorting to emailing or facebooking, so if you know any Gillifans hiding somewhere, please..."

Give us time...we'll MAKE some....


message 17: by Danni, Spoogegirl / Mrs Brown (new)

Danni | 136 comments Mod
Julia wrote: "**SPLASH!**

Another duck lands in Lake Gillibran....

Thanks for the invite!"


Aww what a lovely image. That really made me smile. Welcome Julia, oh wondrous review writer.


message 18: by Julia (new)

Julia | 21 comments Tina wrote: "Thx for the invite, Danni.
I hope you all are patient with me and my English... :)

@JustJen: You are a Gilli virgin? I hope you change that soon. He's so adorable. I'm sure reading his diaries is ..."


You know, this brings up a burning linguistic sort of question, actually.... I was wondering while I was reading these books, how much the experience would be affected based on whether the reader was English (or at least British) vs American or Aussie or Kiwi etc.

When I read Gilli's prose, in my head, the words were American accented. But when I read the dialogue, the words "sounded" Brit to me. And the whole exposition is SO unmistakably British...that was part of what made some scenes to hilarious to me, an American reader.

We Americans find British humor a whole sub genre unto itself. Sometimes, it's almost like reading a foreign language...I keep popping up to bang out "chuffing" and "chippy" on Google, lest I get the oh-so-wrong idea and wind up with my brain twisted into an episodic pretzel. For me, personally, I find it harder (at least initially) to see the prat in some characters because their elegant Britishness conveys an inherent assumed poshness that an Englishman or Scotsman would find absurd. I, perhaps, gave Dick and Shane more leeway initially than I should because surely they were too classy to be such knobs.

Uh huh.

I ADORE British humor and surely some of the appeal of these books was their spot on feeling of a "day in the life" of a British guy...and effervescent quality that only words like "tin" and "roger" and "bin" and "it all went Pete Tong" can bring. I try to imagine the same book written by an American guy and I wonder if it would have been quite as funny.

So...how many Brits do we have here? Just curious. If we're going develop a cunning plan to take Gilli global, it's good to know where we start from.

(I don't even know what I'm asking here...just rambling. I had a hysterectomy three weeks ago and my brain hasn't figured out what to do with the extra space yet.)

Cheers!


message 19: by JustJen "Miss Conduct" (last edited Mar 18, 2013 05:09PM) (new)

JustJen "Miss Conduct" | 16 comments I recced it to my twink loving friend, and she is already in love with Gilli. I invited her to the group as well.


message 20: by Macky (new)

Macky (mactut) | 142 comments *holds hand up* .... I'm a Brit! :D


message 21: by Macky (new)

Macky (mactut) | 142 comments Snap on the hysterectomy... I've had open planning there for about 7 years! Sympathies :)


message 22: by Julia (last edited Mar 18, 2013 05:44PM) (new)

Julia | 21 comments Macky wrote: "*holds hand up* .... I'm a Brit! :D"

That's two!

Macky wrote: "Snap on the hysterectomy... I've had open planning there for about 7 years! Sympathies :)"

That's two, too!

It was actually fairly easy, except that I am what they call a "single mother by choice" with 7 year old twins. It was like a David Attenborough "Wild" special at home for a couple of days, but what the hell...nobody died, drank Drano or found my secret stash of Kettle Cooked potato chips...I call that a successful convalescence.

I am still haunted, though, by the thought of my bewildered uterus being ceremoniously escorted from my body, blinking in the light. "What? What did I do? Where are you taking me?"

It all HAS been an excellent time to re-re-re-re-read my "pantheon" collection on my Kindle, which includes a generous assortment of Mr. Gillibran.

Of course....


message 23: by Danni, Spoogegirl / Mrs Brown (new)

Danni | 136 comments Mod
Julia wrote: "(I don't even know what I'm asking here...just rambling. I had a hysterectomy three weeks ago and my brain hasn't figured out what to do with the extra space yet.)"

Fill the extra space with Gill-love Julia! Hope you're feeling bright eyed and bushy tailed after your recuperation :)

I love your description of your poor, bewildered uterus. I'm a total weirdo and I have to admit that when my son had his appendix out, I was devastated that the hospital thoughtlessly threw it away, instead of giving me the chance to view it in all its gangrenous glory :( Not to mention the fact that it must have felt sad and unloved, constantly being referred to as useless, redundant and superfluous to requirements.

Oh, btw, another Brit here {waves to my northern chum, Macky} - I do wonder about how Gilli translates, in fact so much so I will start up a thread about it - sorry Julia, I will have to copy and paste your remarks because I am a very dozy moderator and have no idea how to move a comment.


message 24: by Macky (new)

Macky (mactut) | 142 comments Good morning my Gilli friends! I might be a bit scarce today and tomorrow. Today the migraine headache of doom is threatening in the background and I want to nip it in the bud because tomorrow is our "wrinkly day out" ... A weekly lunch and shopping day out with my aged parents ( I say aged but they've more energy than me! ) older sister and moi! Hence the term wrinkly because there's nobody under the age of 53!! Its my only day out a week because of my 'confinement' due to the dreaded M.E that has plagued me for the last 7 years! So If i don't get out cabin fever starts and I get terribly grumpy... OMG Id be turning into Shane! nooooooooooo!
Well my lovely Gilliflowers I'm hoping I don't miss too many fantastic threads. Catch you all later!


message 25: by Sucajo (new)

Sucajo Hi everyone! I saw this group in my updates thread and had to join. I am British (well, Scottish) and it must be almost 3 years since I first started reading Gilli's books and I have been addicted since the first page. Nice to meet you all :)


message 26: by Danni, Spoogegirl / Mrs Brown (new)

Danni | 136 comments Mod
Susan wrote: "Hi everyone! I saw this group in my updates thread and had to join. I am British (well, Scottish) and it must be almost 3 years since I first started reading Gilli's books and I have been addicte..."

Hi Susan, lovely to meet another Gillifan :) Thanks for joining the group - make yourself at home.

Macky wrote: "Good morning my Gilli friends! I might be a bit scarce today and tomorrow. Today the migraine headache of doom is threatening in the background and I want to nip it in the bud because tomorrow is ..."

Take care Macky :)


message 27: by Laura (last edited Mar 19, 2013 04:24AM) (new)

Laura (mingaboxer) | 5 comments Hi! So happy to see I am not alone in my love for Gilli...though really how could anyone resist his bratty charms?!?!


message 28: by Danni, Spoogegirl / Mrs Brown (new)

Danni | 136 comments Mod
Laura wrote: "Hi! So happy to see I am not alone in my love for Gilli...though really how could anyone resist his bratty charms?!?!"

Hi Laura, great to see you here. And to think that I was unsure about starting a group in case no one was interested! I should have realised how universally adorable Gilli's bratty charms are :)


message 29: by Fangtasia (new)

Fangtasia | 8 comments Hi everybody! Just like Susan, I saw an entry for this group in my updates and ran to join. I am guaranteed great company if everyone here loves the house boy and his Daddies like I do.

Gilli's books are a blessing. Not only do I find them funny every time but they are deeper and more complex than they appear at first glance. Each reading is successively better.

I fervently hope Mr. Brown continues to write his memoirs. They've been a great help to keeping me marginally sane this past year.


message 30: by Danni, Spoogegirl / Mrs Brown (new)

Danni | 136 comments Mod
Fangtasia wrote: "Hi everybody! Just like Susan, I saw an entry for this group in my updates and ran to join. I am guaranteed great company if everyone here loves the house boy and his Daddies like I do.

Gilli's bo..."


Hi Fangtasia. Great to see you here.

I agree about how complex the books are. They sound like they should be a frivolous read but there's so much going on below the surface.


message 31: by Tina (new)

Tina (whitemooony) Welcome Laura and Fangtasia :)

LOL So many Gilli loving girls are already here. That's awesome! :D


message 32: by Danni, Spoogegirl / Mrs Brown (new)

Danni | 136 comments Mod
Tina wrote: "Welcome Laura and Fangtasia :)

LOL So many Gilli loving girls are already here. That's awesome! :D"
Isn't it just!


JustJen "Miss Conduct" | 16 comments Alert, alert! I'm almost finished with book 1, thought I had book 2, but can't seem to find it. I'm concerned about Gilli withdrawals!


message 34: by Laura (last edited Mar 19, 2013 11:46AM) (new)

Laura (mingaboxer) | 5 comments He hasn't updated his diary lately so I can understand the withdrawals!

And it's good to see you here as well Fangtasia!


message 35: by Sucajo (new)

Sucajo Laura wrote: "He hasn't updated his diary lately so I can understand the withdrawals!"

He had posted to say he didn't think he would publish anymore books but that he would keep updating his diary entries but I see that it no longer says that on his webpage. Hopefully this means he will go ahead and publish more :)


message 36: by Danni, Spoogegirl / Mrs Brown (new)

Danni | 136 comments Mod
Susan wrote: "Laura wrote: "He hasn't updated his diary lately so I can understand the withdrawals!"

He had posted to say he didn't think he would publish anymore books but that he would keep updating his diary..."


I don't follow his online diary because I like to take one big Gilli hit all in one go. I'll be devastated if he doesn't publish any more books :(


message 37: by Sucajo (new)

Sucajo I don't really read his online entries either but I like to go by his page every couple of months just to satisfy myself that he is still writing.

He has removed the links for his 2009 and 2010 diary entries so hopefully he at least intends to publish these two as books.


message 38: by Julia (new)

Julia | 21 comments I remember reading somewhere in his diaries entries that he though he "had a book or two left in me."

I must admit to impertinent curiosity about the night D&S decided to take Gilli into their bed and change the whole relationship structure of the household. He's said he's not ready to write it yet. He's said it's too intimate and too personal to write yet. But he's also said that it's a story that "deserves" to be written. And he gave one specific detail about it, in that he mentions being embarrassed and terrified he was going to be fired the morning after.

there's a BUNCH of unanswered questions here: 1. was this something D&S talked about between themselves beforehand? 2. Was the initial attraction just Dick's to Gilli? 3. Was Shane merely humoring Dick at the start? Humoring your lover's crush is one thing, but Shane mentions something about "you knew what the rules of this relationship were the first night you came into our bed." So that implies forethought on both sides and some kind of general commitment from Shane. 4. Did Gilli embark on a deliberate seduction, as a sequel to his original "con" (to use Shane's word) that got him into the household? Did he really understand what he was getting into...he was apparently pretty desperate to find a place to belong. 5. Did things develop in stages following the first night, or was everyone in for a pound rather than a penny from the get-go? 6. Was there a trial period? 7. What did Gilli think he knew about D&S's respective feelings for him? 8. Did he go into it "knowing" that Shane didn't feel as strongly for him as he wanted?

The kid was, what? 22 when he went into this? This is a LOT for any young adult to assess and handle, particularly when one barely knows oneself yet. I'm still figuring shit out and I ain't no 22.

I have wound up loathing Shane for a lot of reasons (that's another essay, due at the end of the week -- Sorry, Miss) but near the top of my list is his constant, unfair expectation of a level of maturity from Gilli that is unrealistic and somewhat cruel. Shane crushes the extraordinary by relentlessly treating it as ordinary. It's very "pot, meet kettle" because he blisters Gilli's backside for letting the infamous "whatever" slip, and yet most of Shane's reaction to Gilli's various resisting or upset for some very-hard-to-swallow life situations is a big fat "Get Over It," in everything he says and does.

Not sure how this is any different.

More thoughts to come, but I have to redraft my outline and make sure my footnotes are in order first.


message 39: by Julia (new)

Julia | 21 comments Macky wrote: Today the migraine headache of doom is threatening in the background and I want to nip it in the bud because tomorrow is ..."

How's the head, Macky? I'm assuming that wasn't a metaphor....


message 40: by Tina (new)

Tina (whitemooony) Susan wrote: "I don't really read his online entries either but I like to go by his page every couple of months just to satisfy myself that he is still writing.

He has removed the links for his 2009 and 2010 di..."


Yes, I've seen that and I hope with you... :D


message 41: by Macky (new)

Macky (mactut) | 142 comments Hi Susan. Hi Laura. Hi Fangtasia and all the rest of us Gilliflowers.

@ Julia... You nailed it! I think there's a lot of things we would glean from Gilli- the prequel. I think you're spot on about Shane accepting Gilli for Dicks sake, I've said that before and LOL on the head metaphor!! :D


message 42: by A.B. (last edited Mar 20, 2013 01:33PM) (new)

A.B. Gayle (abgayle) | 18 comments Thanks to Fang for inviting me in and Danni for forming the group. I gather there is a fourth book out, so I have some catching up to do. Has anyone invited Gilli to be a part of it?

And I so totally "get" Shane. Not sure what that reveals of me?


message 43: by Macky (new)

Macky (mactut) | 142 comments Hi A.B .
You can have Shane, he's all yours! lol! :D Nice to see the Gilliflowers are growing.... Amazing how one bratty ( but adorable) sub can get us all ' fan girling'. No sign of a fourth book that know of but someone did say some of his diary entries have been taken off the web site so perhaps he's getting set to start a new one! Fingers crossed :)


message 44: by A.B. (new)

A.B. Gayle (abgayle) | 18 comments I thought Gilliflowers was the fourth book? And I'm happy to have Shane. But then I'm also a Dan fan in Special Forces. Support the underdog, that's me!


message 45: by Julia (last edited Mar 20, 2013 03:59PM) (new)

Julia | 21 comments A.B. wrote: "Has anyone invited Gilli to be a part of it?

And I so totally "get" Shane."


Okay....NOW you have to put out! I think I get what you're getting at when you say you get what you're getting. Got that? But I could be wrong. Do you get Shane because you have tendencies or behaviors like his? Or because you know somebody who does and you've figured them out?

I'm definitely in the latter camp myself, and I have me some powerful reactions to some of Shane's actions and choices...and I have some equally powerful reactions to Gil's attempts to rationalize and accept blame for some of it. I admire the attempts and appreciate the willingness to take on responsibility for his actions...but I really dislike it when along with his own share, he takes on responsibility for Shane's reactions too. Nuh uh.

I'll elaborate on this more when I get my head screwed on straight here. There's too much world and too little of me in it.

Also...I'd be veeeerrryyy leery of extending an invite to the Man himself to peek at this group. Remember, this is a real person (apparently) and these are real people in a real relationship. We can't really ask a partner to come into a group that spends half its time pounding on one of his loves. He can rip up on Shane all he likes because Shane is HIS. But that doesn't mean he'd be comfortable with a bevy of Gillifans ripping Shane a new one, no matter how well intentioned. Sort of a "love me, love my big alpha, arrogant asshole Daddy Dog" situation.

He might be quite startled to discover our vehemence. It's a monster he's created, of course, but knowing it's out there is different from experiencing "Hate Shane" and "Dick is a wussed out pussy Daddy wannabe" first hand.

Maybe there's a way to integrate our love/hate fest with the emotional well being of the author. I'm so not qualified to come up with that solution. I'm just not nice enough, though I pretend when I have to. Spare the snark, spoil the Julia.

Anyway, my two cents/pence. Anyone else have a different take?


message 46: by Macky (new)

Macky (mactut) | 142 comments A.B. wrote: "I thought Gilliflowers was the fourth book? And I'm happy to have Shane. But then I'm also a Dan fan in Special Forces. Support the underdog, that's me!"

Sorry meant to say Fifth... I'm a bit brain dead at the mo! Course Gilliflowers is the fourth! DUH! :)


message 47: by A.B. (new)

A.B. Gayle (abgayle) | 18 comments I'm not saying everything Shane does is right. Far from it. None of us are perfect. But he is the right man for the job. Have you checked my reviews of the books? What he says and what he does are not always the same thing. I think he is a big softy underneath.

Is it healthy to be the big bad all knowing Dom who is never wrong and knows what is best for the sub? That's the question. And are they like this because they have no control over other aspects in their lives and need one part where they feel they are? People who work with the public or are at the beck and call of corporate bosses, maybe second rung of the ladder who have all the responsiblity but can't make the decisions. They're the sorts of people who need an outlet and could find it in a relatonship where someone needs constancy.


message 48: by A.B. (new)

A.B. Gayle (abgayle) | 18 comments Macky wrote: "A.B. wrote: "I thought Gilliflowers was the fourth book? And I'm happy to have Shane. But then I'm also a Dan fan in Special Forces. Support the underdog, that's me!"

Sorry meant to say Fifth... ..."


Glad you said that. I just bought Gilliflowers and was worried that I'd bought the wrong thing.....


message 49: by Macky (new)

Macky (mactut) | 142 comments Julia wrote: "A.B. wrote: "Has anyone invited Gilli to be a part of it?

And I so totally "get" Shane."

Okay....NOW you have to put out! I think I get what you're getting at when you say you get what you're ge..."


Its funny Julia because I highlighted a passage from book two where Gilli talks about the lifestyle they practice and his love for his two daddies.

" Shane was sitting on the couch, laptop open on his knee, a frown of concentration on his face. Butterflies invaded my gut again but with a different agenda. I love him even at his very harshest. He means the world to me and so does Dick. The discipline lifestyle I practice with them can be difficult and sometimes I do just want to shove it in a box out of sight and please only myself, but most of the time I truly want to serve it to the best of my ability because it not only excites and stimulates me, it also comforts and nurtures me. I am bound to them not by chains or ropes, but with all my heart and soul."

How can you argue against or trash that sort of honesty? If Our lovely Gilli is a real person I would hate to think that our harsh words where actually hurtful, but it doesn't stop me from getting all worked up for him when troubles brewing , which leads to very negative thoughts towards a certain person, its only human! That's what these books do to you... Emotions all over the place.


message 50: by Julia (last edited Mar 20, 2013 04:30PM) (new)

Julia | 21 comments A.B. wrote: "I'm not saying everything Shane does is right. Far from it. None of us are perfect. But he is the right man for the job. Have you checked my reviews of the books? What he says and what he does are ..."

These are really interesting questions and stuff I hope to explore with you guys more as time rolls by. A large part of what I loved about these books was that they forced me to really work to analyze the characters. There's what he gives us on the surface and then a whole lot of unwritten clues that one has to experience differently on separate read throughs. There are also significant holes where we just don't know, and have to bring our own perspective to bear and hope we're right, and therefore just in our judgment.

There's only one other series I've ever read that has drawn me in as deeply to the subtle analysis of multiple characters interacting with each other in the complexities of a domestic discipline relationship, and that's the Falls Chance book set. And perhaps, because I've read and re-read and then read those books again, I have a highly tailored view of what constitutes honesty and trust and responsibility between a top and brat. Of course, Falls Chance is idealized, but it has a central psychological integrity that leaves me breathless. So when Gilli behaves the way he does sometimes, I see something obvious and really, easily dealt with, directly and with compassion and care for who Gilli is naturally, rather than the role he's supposed to fill. And when Shane reacts to Gilli's provocations, it's kind of like a fist on a piano keyboard. It's jarring and emotionally discordant. Sometimes, it's just plain ugly. The structure is there, the relationship is there, the roles are there, the willingness is there...but the trust is missing in key areas...and in my book, that's Shane's fault. Certainly, a Falls Chance ranch top would say so.

I'm just bouncing around the edges of this, and I know brevity makes me cryptic, but i've a seven year old who has stretched 20 minutes of homework into an hour, and I'm feeling a bit toppy myself. More later.


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